"It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone."
― Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
Clarke was not prepared for the vertical drop she fell into. Beneath the drain there was a tube that ran down into darkness, Clarke could not see where it led, only that there was a breeze that she felt when Finn brought the grate to the side for her to get into it. It scooped at the bottom as Clarke was pushed by her own velocity into the air and into the open. To her surprise she softly landed, as the forest floor was covered with a thick layer of moss, a little wet from the nights' rainfall before. She laid her hands down on the soft, wet moss. She turned her hand to see her palm, a thick scar visible through the middle of her hand. She squeezed it tight, as she did her eyes, once again trying to dispel the pain. Something in her told her to open them however, something told her the scar was soon to be healed.
She could hear Finn clinking from the noise of the drain she had just come out of. He could quite easily be shutting the lid and leaving her to fend for herself out here. Not that she hadn't once done that before, she could do it again. She looked up a hill behind her, Camp Jaha sitting at the top as she realised the drain travelled down the hill to the sea of moss at the bottom. Soon realising that it was quite literally a sea of moss and that the moss was not wet from rainfall, Clarke got up to walk towards the forest floor, suddenly smelling the contents of the drain. She rested her hand against a tree whilst waiting for Finn to appear, stepping once again on a foreign item, Clarke looked down to see a notepad resting at the bottom of it, a pen attached to the first page. She couldn't believe anything so Ark-like could be sitting outside the camp's walls. She picked it up, unsure as to open it or not, she knew more than anyone the contents of a notebook, sketchpad, diary was something that should stay closed unless you are to one it belongs to. It can't be anything special she thought to have been discarded so easily and outside the camp's walls. She opened the first delicate page, the pages were old and worn, she could tell it was made since the landing, as it wasn't as perfect as the notebooks they made on the ark, albeit few were made due to lack of resources.
To her delight, the book was filled with drawing of princes and princesses, a boy with long floppy hair a little like Finn's. They were all such simple and delightful pictures. She soon realised it must be someone's from the children's quarter as the bunk beds she recognised were also drawn, a hand dropping off one of them. She smiled at the sentiment of the sleeping child, at peace. One drawing however was a scene which Clarke was too familiar with, it was simply a square, but it had numbers squiggled all over it and oak tree markings and rings from where the bottom of a bunk bed showed it's marks and history. She let out a little breath as she realised her 002 and 097 love heart had been outlined a few times and was still in the same place as she had drawn it 17 years ago. It was her bunkbed from the child's quarter. Meant for children but would house the outcasts of the camp, as she was 17 years ago. Clarke had a sudden revelation of it being one of the children that escaped that morning, realising they must have dropped it, feeling extra anxious at the thought of the sketchbook belonging to Hera. It wouldn't be a surprise if she had inherited Clarke's flair for art. She felt another pang of anxiety as she visioned something happening to her if she had to leave such a precious belonging on the forest floor.
Finn finally appeared and with a smile smacked upon his face went to hug Clarke, only to realise the smell and the look of the two was too bad. They camped a few yards from camp that night in case they had to suddenly go back, using all the same tricks they had used 20 years ago when they landed.
"Just like old times," said Finn, using his water bottle saved from Camp to cheers Clarke. She didn't want to admit it was exactly like old times, just the two of them, vulnerable to the working of the forest night. Instead, she just gave a soft smile. "What we gonna do with our new-found freedom?"
"I thought I got new-found freedom once before Finn, and you know as well as me it doesn't last long." Finn tried to find amusement in her words, but she wasn't kidding.
"At least it's a clean slate," He further tried to lighten to mood.
"Not really Finn if Prince Roan finds me, he'll know that I've escaped soon." Clarke worried. Prince Roan had made sure she stayed within the walls of Skaikru camp for 17 years. She had once before made the mistake of having her cake and eating it; it had a sour after taste. Finn just pushed a smile and kept quiet, he wanted her to feel safe and happy, the only thing that had kept her really in the Skaikru walls for so long was the prospect of her daughter, Finn had too many chances to leave without her, the time had finally come and she wasn't sharing his feeling of joy.
"We need to move away from this forest as soon as we can," she warned.
"This is was once your forest Clarke, you don't want to revel in it for at least a minute?" Finn asked.
"You know perfectly well why I wouldn't want to revel in it Finn," again the silence struck, Finn's attempts at light-heartedness with Clarke had failed, a pastime he was all too familiar with.
"Well we'll have to go tomorrow after we've washed. We are a trackers dream smelling like this," Finn expertly advised, pulling his t-shirt away from his skin as it wreaked of the contents of the drain.
Clarke softly chuckled at his face pulled at the smell, Finn innately returned the smile as he had finally made her laugh. "We need to find Hera first though." She reminded him.
She pushed her body up against a tree opposite Finn, dampening the fire they had lit. Her body shook as it suddenly felt the sharp cold of the night, she closed her eyes reminiscing on the first night they had landed of the 100 being freezing cold in their thin clothing from the arc and having to all bundle together in order to create heat from each other. Finn went to push his back against hers. Both slept terribly, with one eye open. Plenty of times had they had to learn from the mistake of falling asleep in a vulnerable situation, "If were found together this time Clarke, tell me you won't go flush red again," Finn joked resting his hand on his face. She kicked him in the calf,
"You can't make fun of naïve me like that, especially when you were the one two-timing, you were the one who should have been embarrassed,"
"Hey, I think I have earned my fair share of embarrassment since I was caught," he joked, turning his body to face her, Clarke doing the same.
"It's good we can joke about this now you know; I don't know how I would've coped all these years in that camp without you."
"Well you didn't forgive me until about 10 years ago,"
"Hey!" she said, playfully slapping him on the arm, "I had good right not to forgive you after betraying the 100 by telling Skaikru our location,"
"How many times can I say I'm sorry Clarke!" the tension began to rise a little, "Please, let's not dwell on it because we've been through too much to argue over it for the rest of our life,"
"Fine, yes of course you're right," she giggled, "The worst still had to be when you played me and Raven though, I can never forgive you for that!" she joked, she didn't really care that much when Raven had come down to earth, revealing Finn's big secret. It hurt like hell for a few weeks, but then she got over it, she was just adapting to life on earth, whilst also trying to grow up. It was Finn who took longer to get over it, he moped around her for the next year, trying endlessly to make up for playing her. "Imagine Raven or even the 100 now seeing us friends again, I wonder what they'd say," she continued to smile, until she saw Finn's drop and once again the silence drown the night.
"Imagine what he'd say." Finn simply stated, staring into Clarke's eyes. They both realised where their conversation had gone, of the man that still stood between them. Clarke realised what Finn insinuated to how he meant a reaction to everything that had happened over the last 17 years, how he would react to Hera, never mind the fact that she had befriended one of his worst enemies.
Clarke couldn't bare to look at Finn anymore, memories of the past flooding her mind as she turned away and squeezed her eyes shut. "Goodnight Finn," she said, leaving the tear that was rolling down her face, aware the Finn would see her movement of wiping it away.
"Come on Clarke, you can't avoid him forever, what if he's still out there, what if they're all out there? What would we do if we happened to come across them? He would kill me Clarke you know he would." Finn sat up.
"I said Goodnight Finn," she snuffled.
"Clarke you realise Hera could've found him on her own?" She stayed silent. This thought had of course crossed her mind. If the 100 were still out there, they would know most things moving in the forest, they would know that there were three teenagers, unintelligible of the forest, roaming around like children in the chocolate factory. And Hera would have met him. "Surely that's not a harder thought than knowing they've ended up with the grounders, or worse Prince Roan?"
"Go to sleep Finn." She stayed lying on her side her head resting on the tree, possible situations racing through her head. Finn finally gave in and laid down beside her.
The two woke up to the sun rising and began their search for Hera. They knew she couldn't have gone far, she hadn't been outside the children's quarter yet and the three teens, as the 100 did 20 years ago, wouldn't have known what to do with themselves as they would come across the forest's wonders. It was when Clarke came to a familiar stream that she knew where she was,
"This way Finn, there's a lake at the bottom of this stream," she led the way as the two made their way through the familiar forest, Finn had made shift some daggers out of fallen branches and the two kept close awareness of their weaponry in case they should need it. Finally, the two came across the familiar waterlily swarmed lake. Clarke soaked her eyes in the view as the pinks and the greens brought her back to the first time, she saw it, the beauty of the mountain looming over it, the reflection of the flowers on the lake. She watched Finn as he immersed himself into the water,
"Oh, you forget how good this feels!" he excitedly shouted
"SHH!" she beckoned, not forgetting the exposure the lake brought with it, but still beckoned with a smile on her face as she readied to join him.
She was about to dive in when she saw a small wreath made out of twigs, 20 or so were carefully intertwined together, resting on the rocks where she used to sit with the 100 when they used to come all together. She held her breath as she realised what the wreath meant, this only deepened as she realised there was only one possible person who could've made it.
"What you looking at?" Finn asked, dripping wet as he came out the water to lay on the rocks to dry.
She held up the wreath, Finn stared blankly at her. "What is it?" he tried to mimic her enthusiasm at what he saw as a few twigs in a circular shape. A rustle came from behind the clearing and twigs snapped as the two heard low voices approaching, but with nowhere to run, the two tensed as they waited for their fate. If it was grounders they were done for, if it was the ice nation they were done for, and Clarke really didn't want to know her fate if it was the 100.
Two tall men came out of the trees, freezing when they saw the blonde and the laid down Finn, followed by a skinny boy, too old to be a child, too young to be an adult.
"Clarke?" Jasper's whole face melted as he realised who stood in front of him.
"This can't be happening," Monty raced towards her as he went in for the hug, Clarke semi-willingly returning it, not quite realising what was happening whilst still holding tightly to the wreath in her hand.
She finally came to her senses when Jasper joined them, and she held onto them so tight, she felt like she might explode. Tears streamed down her face, which only tightened her stance around them.
They stepped back for a moment, examining the blonde before them, who had hardly aged from the 17 years before when they last saw her.
"Wow, what skin cream do they use at Skaikru?" joked Monty, Clarke tapped his arm,
"I can't believe you two are still up to your old tricks roaming the forest by yourself?" Clarke joked and half questioned, aware that there may be more of the 100 with them.
"What did you expect?" Monty replied.
"Except for our new recruit, Clarke you may even know him, 420!" Jasper's eyes lit up and licked his lips as Clarke glared at him for making a big deal out of his number.
"I'm afraid I don't," She said, shaking his hand. "You must have a lot of questions right now 420." He nodded his head, confused as to why the two were so friendly with who he guessed Clarke from the stories Bellamy had told. "I just can't believe you two are alive!" she was like an excited puppy. She couldn't believe her luck, seeing such good friends after so long.
"Can't believe we're alive?! We always land on our feet!" Monty laughed, "You on the other hand Clarke are the one we thought gone forever,"
"Perhaps I am, perhaps I'm a ghost!" Clarke said, before commenting, "would explain the hell I'm living," she instantly regretted saying it as the excited reunion suddenly focused on what was actually happening, and the situation at hand. There was a reason Clarke had to be away from the 100 for so long, and no one was safe standing, joking in the woods.
The attention soon went to the wreath Clarke still held in her hand.
"So, you figured we're not the only ones up to our old tricks." Said Jasper, pointing to her wreath. She pushed a smile and held up her wreath,
"I thought he only made these when I was around, guess lots has changed." Clarke muttered.
"Well, actually that's the first one we've seen him make in a while. But he made it while talking about you if that makes you feel any better."
"He was talking about me? Recently?" A warmth spread through Clarke like fire, to know he still thought of her, as she endlessly did of him. Even after all this time.
"Well, we've had a few curious limpets at camp recently," said Jasper, gesturing his head towards 420 who was a few steps behind the trio, looking over the lake, pretending not to listen. Suddenly it all clicked and 420 was one of the teens who had escaped with Hera, they were alive after all. They were with the 100 after all.
"Hera." Clarke let out in a breath,
"What?" said Jasper, until the shadow of Finn on the rock soon came into the light beside Clarke. Jasper and Monty tensed up as they realised who Clarke was with.
"What the fuck are you doing still out in the woods?" Monty eyes filled with rage and both men's arms bulged as their blood quite literally boiled.
Finn held up his hands, Clarke pushed the distance away from the men to Finn as they began to square up on him.
"He's with me, don't hurt him," she warned.
"Clarke you've got to be kidding," Jasper held his hand to his forehead in disbelief. "After all he did."
"Yeah well I've had a lot of time to forgive," she replied. "Just leave him." Finn backed down, a little annoyed at his familiar inferiority in the group. She linked the arms of the two men and began to walk in the direction to what she used to call home. "Now take me to Hera."
"What?" asked Monty.
"403." She stated.
"How do you know-"
"-We've got a lot of catching up to do." Clarke eagerly replied, her daughter finally in her grasp, her life finally falling together. All she needed to do was find Hera and leave the forest that dug up too many memories Clarke had worked hard to bury in the last 17 years. A flurry of excitement and anxiety came over her, she wouldn't know how to act when she met her. This moment had been thought of too many time to be perfect in the last 17 years. She envisioned her finally uniting with her daughter, she envisioned that she had been waiting for her just as Clarke had been for her for so long. She did, however, forget that at the camp, there was someone else who had been waiting impatiently all this time too.
AN: Thank you so much for reading this far! I can't thank you enough, I understand there is a lot of ambiguity in the story so far, so do please tell me if it is too much to understand?! But there are lots of secrets soon to be revealed!... Please review, I would love to hear suggestions, constructive criticism, and of course if you like it (the best form of review!) Bonus points if anyone understands the title of this chapter? If not it will all soon make sense..