I couldn't believe my eyes. Horror and shock filled my body as quickly as the the tears left. I came home from a long day of working on the docks as a cabin boy and walk into the room to see Tony and his best friend having sex. His dark blue member bulging from the throat of the midget usually dressed in green but now covered in nothing but his sweat. His eyes replaced with hearts...and stars and horseshoes and clovers. The tiger pushes the head to the base of his furry schlong and growls aggressively "oh fuck~ yourrrrr great!!" as he vibes on the leprechaun. Milk on his red hair, leaking from his mouth and pouring onto his hands in a bowl shape. He pants and smiles swallowing as much as he can. "I-It's magically delicious." This was the last straw. In a fit of rage I yell "UHUHUHUH" and slam the door shut leaving. Only at that point do they notice that I was there Witnessing the whole show of horror. I shivered in a fit of rage. Was this what they were doing? Everytime Tony said he was visiting a friend. I don't think I can take this anymore. I needed to see a friend of my own.
My knocks at the door were cut short by it opening almost as if he was waiting for me. I sheepishly smile trying to hide my pain but it did no good. Obama was a dear friend of mine and I trusted him even more than I trusted Tony. But this time something was off. His usual tall and almost lanky stature was replaced with a thick hourglass like figure of wide hips and Voluptuous breasts. But...his face was still the same old Obama. I wanted to question the sudden change but my issue was more pressing. "What's wrong, my fellow american?" he said in his deep american voice. I came in and sat down on the couch explaining the situation. I explained how I felt so alone and as if my purpose in this world was gone, as if I didn't belong. It was sure signs of suicidal thoughts and most people would be too bamboozled by the events leading up to this visit to respond, he knew just what to say.
"Now Sans. you uhhhhh need to get over him. He has broken the uhhhhh sanctity of your uhhhhhhhh...Relationship. You need to get back...in the game. His dick probably not even that good"