Being called back to Earth like a dog on a chain by Mickey the Idiot had been irritating at first, but Rose's ex (was he her ex? The Doctor still wasn't quite sure what that situation was) surprised the Doctor by being incredibly useful in stopping a dangerous Krillitane invasion.

Even more surprising than that, however, was Sarah Jane Smith - in the flesh, standing before him doing what she always did and investigating. She was older, that was true, but the Doctor always saw his companions as he remembered them, when they were at their best.

He could never regret getting to see his old friend again, but Sarah Jane's untimely appearance did have some unfortunate consequences in that it had caused Rose to begin doubting herself. The Doctor agreed to take Mickey on board with them, thinking that perhaps that might please her and offer her some comfort, but, of course, his brilliant plan ended up having the opposite effect and Rose was more irritated than ever.

It was an unspoken routine for the Doctor and Rose Tyler to be with one another whenever they retreated into the time vortex between adventures for a few hours of rest before the next planet or civilization needed rescuing - it was just another one of the comfortable habits that they had formed during their travels together. They never planned or discussed where they would meet up, they always simply seemed to gravitate towards each other in one way or another. However, for the first time since she had come on board the TARDIS, Rose was avoiding him.

"What's with that face, then?" Mickey asked after the Doctor had gone out of his way to show him the galley and everything that he would need in order to get around on his first night onboard the Doctor's magnificent time ship.

The Doctor had been scowling at the floor between his shoes when Mickey broke him out of his self-flagellation, but now he turned the scowl on him. "What face? This is my normal face," he insisted through clenched teeth.

"Ah, I get it," Mickey replied knowingly. "You messed up. Is she giving you the cold shoulder, then?"

"Don't know what you're talking about," the Doctor grumbled irritably

"Want my advice?"

"No."

"Talk to her," Mickey offered anyway.

And the Doctor decided then that he really had made a mistake in bringing Mickey along. What had he even been thinking? Mickey was nosey and useless and nothing but a nuisance.

As though he had read his thoughts, Mickey narrowed his eyes on the Doctor and asked, "Why did you agree to let me come along, anyway?"

"Dunno," the Doctor lied.

"Fine, be that way," Mickey huffed in annoyance. "Doesn't matter. I already have a pretty good guess anyway. You know, I'm not as dumb as I look."

"No?" the Doctor asked challengingly.

The young man squared his shoulders indignantly as he met the Doctor's glare and accused him simply, "You wanted a distraction, a buffer, a ... an excuse."

"Oh, what are you talking about?" the Doctor snapped irritably.

"You're afraid of being alone with her because you're afraid of what might happen," Mickey continued haughtily. "Or maybe, now, what won't happen, since she refuses to even talk to you."

"You don't know what you're talking about," the Doctor insisted stubbornly.

"No? You don't think I can see the way that you two look at each other?" Mickey asked snidely. "They way you've always looked at each other? It's changed, you know - since you went and did that vanishing act on Christmas. Everything has changed and you still don't know how to handle it, but the look in your eyes when you're with her is exactly the same."

"So, what are you trying to say?" the Doctor snapped, fighting very hard to keep his tone level and to not shout at Mickey outright. If Rose heard them having a row, she would just get even more upset ...

"What I'm saying, mate," Mickey said calmly as he stepped forward and clapped his hands on either side of the Doctor's shoulders, "is talk to her."

And the Doctor really, really didn't want to be shamed into taking Mickey's advice, but what else was he supposed to do? Rose was hurt and he needed to know how he could possibly fix this mess that he had put them in.

The TARDIS was as helpful as she always was when it came to Rose, and she led him right to her door, where he took a deep breath, steeled himself, and quietly knocked.

"You can come in, Doctor," Rose called out to him.

He smirked and shook his head as he opened the unlocked door and silently allowed himself entry into her room - a place that he had never ventured before (not in this body, at least).

"How did you know it was me?" he asked curiously.

"It's always you," Rose sighed, not meeting his eye as she sat on her bed and fiddled nervously with her hands. "Besides, Mickey wouldn't have knocked."

"Rose, I ..." the Doctor began.

"No, Doctor, I'm ... I'm sorry," she interrupted him awkwardly. "I know I'm overreacting, it's just ... it's been a long day and I wasn't expecting you to just ... let Mickey on board like that and I was hoping ... Well, that doesn't matter. What does matter is that I'm fine - really, I am. You don't have to worry."

"No?" he asked quietly, watching her intently as she tried and failed to hold his gaze. "Rose, there is something very, very important that I need for you to understand," he insisted, stepping further into her room but keeping his hands firmly stuffed into his pockets so that he wouldn't be tempted to do anything reckless (like rush forward and throw his arms around her). "I will always worry about you," he informed her resolutely.

That, finally, won him a small smile and she shook her head as she continued to stare at her hands in her lap. "How many, Doctor?" she asked quietly.

"What?"

"How many of us have there been? How many people have you traveled with over the years?" she elaborated. "Can you even count them? Do you even remember?"

"Yes," he replied, his voice barely more than a whisper. "Yes, I remember."

Rose watched him for a moment before standing to her feet and stepping forward to throw her arms around his shoulders in a tight, desperate hug. The Doctor sighed wearily and wished that the sensation didn't feel so much like coming home.

Please don't leave me, Rose begged him silently, pressing her cheek hard against the side of his face as she pushed her thoughts into his head. Please, just promise me that.

The Doctor found that he couldn't formulate a response to that, so instead he finally forced his hands out of his pockets and wrapped his arms tightly around her middle, bringing her even closer until there wasn't even a breath of space left between them.

He buried his nose in her hair and was attempting to organize his thoughts so that he could show her even the tiniest glimpse of all that he felt concerning Rose Tyler when something between their vague mental connection clicked and fell into place. This was the third time, now, that he had experienced this strange sensation - and finally, he began to recognize it for what it truly was.

The Doctor immediately flinched away from her as though he had been burned, staring down at her hurt expression with wide, frantic eyes.

"Doctor?" Rose asked curiously. "What is it?"

But how could he possibly tell her? He had never experienced this before - not with a human, anyway, and certainly not with someone who he cared about. The Doctor realized that the strange, reoccurring feeling that he had been experiencing with Rose ever since his regeneration was none other than the beginning of a bond - the first, fragile ground works for something that was infinitely precious and infinitely dangerous.

"Doctor, what's wrong?" Rose tried again. She took a hesitant step closer in an attempt to erase the space that he had put between them, but the Doctor's mind was already overloaded with his own thoughts, and he knew that he couldn't risk adding hers into the mix.

"It's fine," he lied breathlessly, twitching nervously away from her. "Everything's fine, I just ... forgot something. I'll just ... go and check on that, then. Be right back. Don't worry, everything's fine!"

The Doctor flashed her his most convincing smile before he turned and ran from her room as fast as his legs could carry him. Her answering expression, though, haunted him for the rest of the night. She was so filled with worry (concern for him) and hurt (her own emotions coming last, always putting herself last). She didn't understand, though she desperately wanted to, but the Doctor had no way of explaining it - not yet, anyway.

He had so many, many words and it still always came down to those five - the five words he couldn't force himself to say, not out loud, not even to himself. All of his ridiculous Time Lord senses were alerting him that the time for telling her was fast approaching - he just wondered if he would be able to make it until then.