Chapter 6 – No Shame if You've Got Game

-:-:-:-:-:-

"But seriously?" Carlos asked, wading around the shallow area of the lake by the pavilion in his new long sleeve swim shirt while Chad soaked up the sun. "Why are you single? People seem to like you."

Chad opened his mouth to reply (he'd learned that Carlos wasn't intentionally insulting with these things, he just had a very blunt way of speaking, likely to do with how little he'd been socialized) but was interrupted by Audrey. "Because everyone knows he's a slut."

All good things had to come to an end eventually, and this particular end had Audrey abandoning cheerleader traditions to slum it with them at the Enchanted Lake after their Tourney win that Friday. Jane had tried to run interference for about five minutes before the princess' tongue had become too sharp for her, and Chad had waved her into the lake so he could take up the task of being Audrey's punching bag himself. He wasn't sure how all of this was supposed to win Ben over, but to each their own.

Carlos was frowning now. "I don't think that's true."

"No, she's right," Chad said lightly, because the best way to end an argument was to not put up one in the first place. "What can I say? I'm a wild stallion."

"Don't try to make it poetic," Audrey muttered, stretching out on her pink beach towel. "He's so desperate for affection he'll accept from anywhere." She shot Carlos a meaningful look over the edge of her blue-tinted sunglasses, lips pulled in a smirk. "Anywhere."

Chad pretended to get mock offended, even though he'd had this conversation with Audrey half a dozen times already. "There's nothing wrong with sampling the fields as long as everyone's onboard with it."

She leveraged an unimpressed look his direction. "There is something wrong with it if you can't land a single princess." She gestured back to Carlos, as though to commiserate. "Not. A single. One."

Chad was sort of glad that the others were out of ear range at this point, though he caught a few concerned glances from Doug and Jane, both of whom Chad waved off with a large smile. "We're still in school, Audrey. It's not like we have to worry about getting married anytime soon. I mean, I know you do- oh wait." He made a show of smacking the side of his head. "I guess you don't anymore."

With this, he casually turned his gaze to where Ben was trying to coerce Mal into jumping off the large boulder on the other side of the lake, Jay and Evie paddling in the water below, trying to let her know everything would be fine.

"Guess somebody decided to opt for an upgrade," he mused.

Audrey ratcheted into the sitting position. "She is not a-!" She cut herself off with a scowl. "I don't know how you can be so calm about this."

Because Chad was also attracted to Ben, though unlike Audrey's desperate thirst for power, it was an unfortunate thing he wished didn't exist.

Chad fluttered his eyelashes. "With beauty and grace, I suppose."

"You fuck," she hissed, and from the corner of his eye Chad saw Carlos tense. "You're actually enjoying this. I mean, of course you would- you're too stupid to understand the implications-"

"I can understand that when a guy doesn't want to get back with his girlfriend," Chad began with a drastic flick of his hand. "It's generally because she's a power-crazy psycho he didn't want to date in the first place."

At this point, Chad was making a show of studying his nails to demonstrate how little he cared about her reaction, which was why he missed Audrey bodily launch herself at him until they both ended up in the lake.

"You fuck," Audrey hissed sweetly when he came back above the water, a strained smile on her face. "You dumb fuck. You don't know anything."

"Yeah-" Chad spat out a mouthful of water. "Think I might know more than you-"

Her nails were burrowing into his shoulders, and she made another lunge to dunk him underwater. "I bet you were the one that wrote that note in the first place," she snarled, likely referring to whatever Aziz had done to set her off. "Forging Ben's handwriting-"

"That sounds far too smart for a 'dumb fuck' like me-"

"-to see me suffer," she snarled. "Lower me to your level. Like I would ever be you-"

They scrambled again, Chad doing his best to ward her off without leaving any marks because Audrey had a light trigger finger when it came to issues of harassment and Chad was Chad, which stacked the deck against him. Meanwhile, Audrey did his best to drown him, nails scraping against his throat, his back, and generally any area of skin she could reach. Normally Chad's body was weird about that kind of shit, except in the instances where someone was actively trying to end his life, whereupon the flight or fight response kicked in.

"Guys!"

Ben's voice cut through the tussle like a lightning strike, freezing Chad and Audrey in place (thankfully, she had her hands on his shoulders this time, instead of his neck where she really wanted them). Lagging behind him was an out-of-breath Carlos (who must have swum for Ben in the first place) and the others, who looked on the spectacle with expressions varying from unreadable to concerned.

"…Hi, Ben," Audrey said, voice tinged with a sickly sweetness that would have made Chad shiver were he not busy trying to breathe.

For once, Ben did not seem to be buying the innocent act. "What's going on?"

"Um…" Chad subtly tried to cough up some water. "…leeches."

He could feel the incredulity emanating from the group in waves.

But again, improvisation, Chad could do this. "There were leeches," he decided. "Audrey was helping me get them off."

"Yep," Audrey stepped in, not missing a beat. "They were… everywhere."

"Except now," Chad said. "Because they're gone. Because we got rid of them."

"Dude," Carlos huffed. "Audrey totally tackled you-"

"Because of the leeches," Chad interrupted smoothly. "I didn't see them. She did. What a pal."

"Just, you know- being helpful," Audrey shot back, fluttering her lashes. "Sorry if we made you worry, Benny-boo."

"Are you sorry for trying to drown Chad?" Carlos asked. "Because you totally were trying to drown Chad."

"We've been over this," Chad gasped, wishing he could take a moment to just- make himself vomit up the water. "What's a little drowning between friends, Carlos?"

"That was more than a little-"

"Thanks, Audrey," Ben cut in, expression unreadable. "That was really… helpful, but um- maybe we've held you up long enough. I'd hate to keep you from your cheerleader traditions."

"Oh." Audrey blinked. "No, that's okay-"

"I insist," Ben said, and that was it, that was the death sentence, and Chad could feel Audrey's nails digging into his back but he didn't care because he sure as shit wasn't going to defend her.

At this point, there was no choice for Audrey but to concede with grace. "Alright, Benny-boo," she purred, arranging her hair in some form of elegance that didn't reflect 'drowned cat'. "I'll catch up with you next time."

"In her dreams," Jay muttered, not as softly as he'd likely intended, if he'd intended to be subtle at all.

Audrey ignored them, deftly gathering up her things before gliding away, dripping water in her wake.

"Bye, Audrey!" Chad shouted, waving at her back because he was a petty soul. "Pleasure talking to you!"

He used the goodbye as an excuse to get out of the lake, wandering off of the stone dais and onto the grass so he could cough up the rest of the water. He expected Jane to keep the others in the lake with a well-timed distraction, except apparently not because by the time he'd finished spitting out water the others were all gathered in a circle behind him.

"Just um- got some water in my throat," he muttered, plastering on a bright grin.

Carlos was not impressed. "Why did you let her talk to you like that?"

Jay frowned. "Like what? What did she say?"

"She kept calling him a slut, dude," Carlos said, and then everyone was frowning, including Jane, who was more than aware of the slut rumors.

"Um-" Chad pressed his hands together as though bidding for peace. "That's because I am a slut? It's not a big deal, guys." He turned his attention to Ben, who was getting frighteningly still. "We were just joking around."

"It didn't sound like a joke," Carlos pressed.

Mal wandered closer, inspecting the angry red lines Audrey had dug into his skin. A few were bleeding. "And these don't look like joking scratch marks," she muttered.

"You have obviously never tangoed with magic leeches," Chad said, just to be a douche because before she'd come here, she hadn't dabbled with magic anything. "She was doing me a favor."

"This is a favor?" Jay asked.

Behind them, Doug rummaged through his bag before returning to the group, first aid kit in hand.

Chad sighed. "It's fine-"

"Sit," Doug ordered, motioning to a fallen column. Mal stood beside him expectantly, arms folded across her chest in a bid of silent warning. One way or another, Chad would be sitting.

He yielded gracefully. "Okay, okay. Geez." He sat down and let Doug get to work, Evie picking at the first aid supplies so she could help too, until they were both carefully cleaning at Chad's scratches.

"Who?" Ben hovered near their column, seeming lost in thought and overwhelmed all at once. "Who says you're a slut?"

"Everyone?" Nearly everyone, and anyone who didn't got the gossip passed to them by Aziz or Lonnie. It was a helpful way to control his image. "Ben, I'm telling you it's fine-"

"It's not fine," Evie said, rubbing carefully at his back. "It's not fine to be reduced to your looks and your- enjoyment of certain activities for the amusement of others. That's not fine."

It surprised Chad, how eagerly Evie argued in his defense, and he didn't know what to make of it. Didn't know if she was speaking from experience or simply trying to win him over. He didn't know.

"Exactly!" Ben snapped before Chad could really think about it. "You're more than just- that."

Chad lifted a brow at the prince, because he'd worked very hard for a reputation that entailed just that.

"And why did you let her mess you up, anyway?" Mal pressed, still lingering nearby. Jay and Carlos were just over her shoulder, watching but not engaging, like they were studying from a distance. "You're stronger than her."

"Because she was helping me." And Chad didn't want to get slammed with trumped up assault charges. He sent a pleading look to Jane, who seemed to get it.

"Forget that," she declared quietly, getting more than a few skeptical looks. "Audrey's gone now, there's no reason to let her spoil the rest of the evening."

"Here, here!" Chad chirped, relieved that they could finally let the subject go.

He knew he likely imagined how much Ben seemed to not want to do that, but the impression was there just the same. Curse his traitorous heart.

-:-:-:-:-:-

Doug was waiting patiently outside the bathroom when Chad finished up his shower, first aid kit cradled in his hands like a silent warning, letting Chad know that escape was impossible.

With a sigh, Chad shrugged out of his sleep shirt, sitting on the edge of his bed so Doug could start rubbing whatever creams he had into Chad's scratch marks. Doug's movements were light but sure, careful smears against the long, narrow cuts, and it took a dedicated effort on Chad's part not to respond to the thorough treatment. It kind of sucked with Doug being this close, just- touching him. Touching Chad's back.

"Are you afraid of Audrey?" Doug asked out of the blue, fingers massaging careful patterns into Chad's spine.

The question admittedly took Chad by surprise. "Pardon?"

"Audrey," Doug repeated. "She did this to you and you didn't even try to fight back. You didn't even press charges." Chad opened his mouth to spout off the cover story from before, when Doug continued, "And don't say anything about magic leeches; we both know that nothing lives in the Enchanted lake. She assaulted you."

It was a fucking shame that Doug had discovered the truth to Chad's cunning, because now it made this unapproachable thing even more desirable. "It's her against me, Doug. And with two kingdoms backing her, I'd get crushed as collateral easy."

As the sole heir to Sardinia's monarchy, Chad was important, yes, but there were many who were unhappy with his mother's quick ascension through the social classes. Many who thought that Chad was a political mutt and would be better suited to be replaced by someone of a more royal pedigree, whose parents were both of high social stature. So he may have advantage against the Auradon common man, but against another royal he wouldn't be the one given the benefit of the doubt. Especially if that royal was Audrey.

"This isn't right." Doug's fingers stilled against his shoulder blades, and his body was so close Chad could feel the heat emanating from him. "She shouldn't be allowed to get away with hurting you just because-"

"She's a princess?" Chad offered. "But she can, and she will." He felt Doug begin to put up another protest and stilled it with a shake of his head. "Even if I did press charges, my grandfather would have them wiped before they could be served against her. It would look weak - me, a strapping prince, openly admitting to assault by a princess. He'd bury it."

And then bury Chad, but that didn't need to be mentioned.

"It's wrong," Doug pressed. He even sounded choked up about it, which was a kind of sweetness Chad didn't actually need. "It's not fair."

"Life isn't fair." Chad had long gotten used to that. In the grand scheme of things, this was nothing. Hell, Audrey's assault had made her look worse and gotten Doug's hands on Chad, so if anything, he should be thanking her. "It's just the way things are, Doug."

There was likely some sort of argument that Doug would have attempted had the window not creaked open in the next moment. A second later, Evie slid into the room, Jay following on her heels, closing the window behind them.

The princess took in Doug's first aid kit and the treated scratch marks with a knowing look, crossing the room to sit on Chad's free side. "I see you were one step ahead of me," she murmured, unloading a series of homemade ointments out of her purse.

Chad could feel Doug tense ever so slightly. "It seemed like the prominent thing to do."

"You guys didn't have to come," Chad said before things could get weird. Or, weirder. "I mean, I appreciate it, of course, but-"

"I have a few herbal remedies that used to work wonders back on the Isle," Evie interrupted, making quick work of unscrewing a few of her jars. "Jane showed me where I could get ingredients to make better stuff here. I was hoping it could help."

"It couldn't hurt," Chad shrugged, feeling off balance by the way she studied his chest so intently.

"What did the doctors say?" Jay asked, curling up on the window seat and staring off into the night.

"That I should be less enthusiastic in the bedroom," Chad said with a wink, even though none of his audience seemed willing to buy it, an unhappy frown marring Evie's pretty lips.

"Don't," Doug said, his voice tight. "This isn't a joke."

"Obviously," Chad scoffed, shivering when Evie began to dab ointment against the hollow of his throat. "Since none of you are laughing."

"Should we be?" Evie asked. It wasn't a cruel question, he didn't think, more like a genuine probe. "Is anything about this supposed to be funny?"

"The look on Audrey's face was pretty funny," Chad mused, because it had been, seeing her perfect hair plastered to her head in wild disarray while she dripped water like an angry cat was going to be one of his fonder memories. "And that's more than enough for me."

He kept his tone easy, casual, even when Evie's hands probed downwards, attending to the harsh lines slashed across Chad's pectorals. One of them grazed the side of his nipple, but Evie didn't allow that to deter her, her dainty fingers rubbing into the reddened skin with an attentive care that made Chad shudder. He hated it, hated himself, mostly, for getting lost so easily in the feel of Doug so close to him, of Evie taking care of him. Hated that a gentle touch was enough to kindle a distinct heat in him, nipple hardening into a fine pebble with barely any contact. Fuck.

"She doesn't like you," Evie said lightly, pretending not to notice the way her touch affected Chad. "Why is that?"

"People say I'm prettier than her," Chad managed, letting his fingers curl into the blanket beside him to keep from doing something stupid, like touching Doug or Evie. Jay was right there. "So she's probably jealous."

"Think you're right on that one," Jay muttered, propping his head on his knee and watching their work with a lazy half-lidded stare. "But not right about what she's jealous of."

"I have literally n-nothing else that could-" Chad swallowed hard because Evie's hands drifted lower, tracing across his abdomen that refused to hold still under the touch. "Nothing worth envying. Besides my good looks," he added, belatedly.

Doug's hands drifted to his low back, kneading at the skin just above the waist of his pajama pants. "You have plenty of stuff worth envying," he said quietly. "I think Audrey didn't figure that out until too late."

Evie's thumb accidentally dug into one of the scratches on his lower abdomen and Chad hissed, legs spreading reflexively wide when an electric current pulsed through his chest, pooling low in his groin. He flushed, realizing his responses were getting a little more difficult to hide, and hated himself again.

Evie blinked at him. Then slowly, ever so slowly, did it again.

Chad whimpered.

He could feel Jay and Doug's immediate attention; Doug's concerned while Jay was- hungry, probably. Dude seemed horny all the time.

Chad tried to ignore Evie's knowing look, realization spreading across her features, then offered her a sheepish shrug. "What can I say?" He grinned. "There's a reason they call me a slut."

"Don't." Evie's tone was firm and brooked no room for arguments, a steady sort of domination that made Chad tremble. "This isn't that. This is-" She started massaging small circles on his abdomen regardless of where the scratches were, and Chad had to swallow a whine at the careful exploration, at the feel of Doug's arm draping across his shoulder. "This is trust. You're trusting us to take care of you."

Her hand shifted lower, deliberately cupping his groin before giving it a firm squeeze that made his toes curl. He could hear Doug's sharp inhale beside him, but didn't dare look at this roommate.

"You don't," he swallowed, forcing his hands to stay in place. "You don't have to do this, Evie. You don't owe it to me."

"No, I don't," she agreed and it was a relief until she started moving her hand, shifting and grinding her palm between his legs. "But I want to do this. I want to take care of you, the same way you take care of us."

"I- I don't-"

"You do a lot for us." Her gaze was warm and heavy at the same time, pinning Chad in place even as she urged his hips forward into her palm. "You've given us anything we could want. Anything we could need, and you didn't ask for anything in return."

Chad was too aware of Doug's hands on his shoulders, the other teen watching as Evie worked him over, not objecting, not even running away.

"We kept expecting you too," Evie continued. "But you didn't. Carlos practically had to beg you to help with kissing practice."

Doug stilled beside them. "…k-kissing practice?"

Chad flushed. This was not- helping with the anti-slut movement they were trying for here.

But Evie was grinning. "Yes. Chad taught Carlos how to kiss. And I'm sure he'd help you too, Doug, if you asked."

There was not a lot in the world Chad wouldn't do for Doug, but he was pretty sure kissing practice would absolutely ruin him forever.

"And if you did," Evie pressed, hand moving faster. "There would be nothing wrong with it. It would be a- a healthy exploration of intimate relations-" Chad really didn't need to picture him and Doug intimately relating in any capacity, but now he was stuck with that image. "And that is something Audrey would be jealous of. Because she doesn't have anyone she could trust like this."

"And she won't," Doug said, emboldened by Evie's ferocity. "That's what makes her so mad."

"Could we um-" Chad bit at his lip to keep a broken moan from spilling out. "-stop talking about Audrey?"

"Okay," Evie said, speeding up her pace. "This is just about you. We're here for you, and we're going to take care of you, okay?"

"F-fu- Evie," Chad whined, then felt himself come undone, arching into her hand as delicious throws of current ripped through his body.

When he came back to himself, Doug was holding him up and Evie was carding her fingers through his hair in gentle movements.

"Fuck," Jay groaned. Chad had almost forgotten he was there, but it was obvious the other teen had been watching them, his cheeks flushed and breath coming heavy. "Evie-"

"Go get something to clean Chad up," Evie ordered, never taking her eyes off Chad. "And take care of yourself while you're at it."

"Fuck," Jay repeated, and then disappeared into the shadows.

That was- wow.

"I um… think the ointment's dry," Doug said quietly.

Evie nodded, and between the two of them they navigated a mostly boneless Chad back into his shirt. It felt better to be covered, though he was horribly aware of the mess he had made in his pants, the shame of it burning a flush into his cheeks.

"It's okay," Evie soothed as though she knew what was running through his head, working with Doug to guide Chad to lay back down on his bed between the two of them. It was a bittersweet sort of horror to have two such substantially attractive people right there, and the situation only got sort of worse when Jay climbed up between his legs with a wet washcloth.

"Um," Doug said when Jay just- casually pulled down Chad's pants and underwear, cleaning him with careful methodic movements that made Chad flush with the ease of the exchange. They said nothing when the thief pulled his clothes the rest of the way off and tossed his underwear aside, pulling his pajama pants back in place with such efficient movements that Chad could only ruminate in his humiliation for maybe ten seconds before it was over.

Okay, so- not exactly how he'd wanted Doug to see his dick for the first time. Not how he wanted Evie or Jay to see it either, but especially not Doug. At least most of the bruising had faded.

"Not a slut," Evie murmured, curling into Chad's side.

"Nope," Jay agreed, letting his head rest on Chad's stomach, hand lying possessively on his hip because he actually wanted to kill him or something.

"Thirded," Doug murmured, never one to back down from a challenge as he settled in close, pulling his glasses off and setting them to the side. "Motion carries."

"Nerd," Chad whispered, but no one paid him any mind, Evie content with turning off the lamplight and leaving them in darkness, cuddled beneath the blankets that Jay passed them. Like this was a thing.

Maybe it was.

-:-:-:-:-:-

"Benny-boo," Chad heard Audrey's coo drift out the window. "I promise, it wasn't what it looked like."

"It wasn't?" Ben shot back, and Chad knew the only reason either of them spoke so freely was because they thought they were alone in Ben's office. Unfortunately, Chad had needed to sneak some paperwork into the outgoing box on Ben's desk and this had supposedly been the best time to do it, which led to him crouching in some familiar bushes while they hashed whatever out in the room above. "So you didn't call him a slut?"

Ben had her there, but Audrey wasn't one to be easily shaken. "I was joking," she huffed, sounding exasperated that he would even bring it up. "I mean, did Chad seem upset by it?"

"No, because Chad agreed with you." Ben's tone was too difficult to discern, maybe a thread of anger mixed with something else unreadable. Chad was grateful he didn't have to deal with it. "Why didn't you tell me about those rumors?"

"Because I thought you knew them?" A fair enough defense. "Ben, everyone knows it. It's like- breathing. It's just a thing."

"Chad's so-called promiscuity shouldn't be inherent," Ben shot back, and that time, Chad could hear the tension in his voice. "And why did you scratch him up so badly?"

"I told you, it was an accident," Audrey sighed. "Did we argue? Yes, but I'm not going to go ballistic on the guy because of it."

A very well executed lie, Chad almost wanted to applaud her.

"You're not?" Ben challenged- actually challenged which was not a thing Ben did. "Because you've never liked him-"

"He's dumb and shallow, Ben," Audrey sighed. "I know you're old friends, but there's like- no substance there."

"Which is why he doesn't have to be your friend." It sounded like Ben was barely holding onto his composure, which was a strange thing, for Chad. He hadn't realized the other teen had cared so much, but then again, it was Ben they were talking about. And they had been friends a long time. "But he is mine, and you should be able to respect that without trying to drown him."

"I wasn't trying to drown him!" Audrey shot back. "I already told your inspector that." Hold up, there was an inspector? Ben had authorized an inspection? How had Chad missed that? Granted, Jane had forced Chad to have a medical exam to make sure all of the water was out of his lungs after the fact, but that was supposed to be a sealed file. "Can't you accept the fact that I made a mistake?"

"Your mistake hurt my friend, Audrey!" Ben wasn't backing down either. "And you scared Carlos-"

"As if I could scare him," Audrey snapped.

"See?" Ben was pacing now, walking a line behind his desk. "This is why we don't work, Audrey. We don't care about the same things-"

"No, we don't work because you're thinking with your dick, Ben." Wow, Audrey had totally given up on the sweet act to cut straight to the point. "You want to fuck Chad so badly, but you don't realize is that sex is all he'll be able to offer you! That's it, Ben! It's why he sleeps around so much! He knows it's all he's good for!"

What the hell did Audrey have against a healthy sex life? Was she just jealous? Chad was pretty sure she was jealous.

"Don't say that, Audrey," Ben warned, voice a low gravely threat, equivalent to a beast's growl. "Don't-"

"You could have him," Audrey pressed. "You ask and he'd be there in a second, but he can't help you rule the kingdom, Ben. He can't do anything besides look pretty and take dick. You see the way he ogles those VKs-" Alright, at most he was ogling Evie, not all of them. "-he obviously has no shame. Letting Jay feel him up all the time."

Okay that was just- harmless. And sort of who Jay was. And it wasn't like Chad cared.

"You know, I bet they've already had sex," Audrey continued. "Bet he let Jay take him like that without a thought about how you're pining for used goods-"

"That's enough, Audrey!" The roar tore through the room, seeming to pulse through Chad's chest until the world rang with silence, until there was nothing but the sounds of harsh breathing from above.

"…that's enough," Ben repeated, voice barely audible, as though all his energy had been spent. "We're not going to talk about this again."

"…Fine." Chad could picture Audrey crossing her arms defensively. "When this falls apart I'll take you back, but you're going to have to make it up to me."

"Goodbye, Audrey," Ben said, sounding… not broken but- something close to it.

The door slammed shut behind her like a definite thing, and Chad didn't dare move, didn't dare breathe, because that was- a lot. A lot of accusations and Ben had confirmed nothing, meaning it was likely all nonsense from Audrey's overactive imagination, but-

But his heart was pounding in his chest at the thought of it, aching at the idea of disappointing Ben, when Chad knew that he likely already did that every day.

He startled when he heard a thunderous crash from the room above, followed by audible panting- by Ben's audible panting and- he must have thrown something. A chair maybe, against the wall, and now he was just- trying to breathe, so frustrated with his ex-girlfriend that he didn't know what to do anymore.

Chad knew that having Aziz break the two of them up was for the best in the long run, he just wished he wouldn't hurt Ben now. It was a nasty business, but like most other things, it needed to be done. For Auradon.

And more importantly, they needed to take care of Audrey.

-:-:-:-:-:-

"Just find her someone," Chad griped to a frustrated Aziz, Lonnie having the gall to give the Agrabah prince sympathetic looks when Chad just got eye rolls. "I'm serious; she's really messing with Ben."

"Chad, I get it," Aziz sighed. "You don't want anyone hurting your precious Ben-"

"He's not my precious-"

"But life comes with hurdles," Aziz continued. "And Ben's a big boy, he'll get over them."

"He literally growled at her," Chad pressed. "He threw a chair, Aziz. Ben doesn't do that! He doesn't yell and throw things, that's-"

"Audrey's territory?" Lonnie offered. Jane hummed in agreement.

"Exactly!" Chad snapped. "We need to get her out of the way before she corrupts him some more."

"Ugh," Aziz gushed, letting his head fall back on Lonnie's bed. "Toxic people."

Lonnie offered him a commiserative leg pat. "Look, the problem is that Audrey doesn't actually care about Ben or having a boyfriend, she just wants to be queen of Auradon, and literally the only person who can give that to her is Ben. So either we have to give her something that's more appealing than that, or make it so that Ben couldn't possibly be worth struggling through to get that queen-ship."

An expression not unlike a lightbulb moment settled onto Aziz's face. "You know what? I think I've got this."

"What?" Chad perked up. "What are you going to do?"

"Honestly, nothing," Aziz chirped. "Ben's already doing most of the work, but trust me, it will get done."

"That is not how you solve-"

"It will," Aziz interrupted with a haughty look. "Get done."

"Until then, we could create some sort of dance with a queen nomination?" Jane offered. "Like a Fall Ball or something? Then we could just rig the ballets to give her thirst for power an immediate but ultimately harmless fix."

"Yes." Chad snapped his fingers. "See, these are the ideas we've been needing."

"The idea to create a superfluous social event to cater to a spoiled princess' needs?" Lonnie asked. "I mean, there are worse ways to solve a problem."

"You say this," Aziz grumbled. "But now we're going to have to get two formal outfits. And who are we going to rig for 'Fall Ball' King?"

A weighted silence fell over them.

"Oh, hell no," the Agrabah prince griped, but Jane was already putting it down in writing, which meant the deal had already been sealed.

So it was written in gel ink, so it shall be. Thus was the will of the 'Save Auradon' team.

-:-:-:-:-:-

"Fall Ball?" Ben read, frowning at the rumpled flyer in his hand. "I don't remember approving this."

"That's what happens when you don't read your paperwork closely enough, Benny-boy," Chad chirped, pretending to sweep his gaze over the flyer Lonnie and Jane had designed as though he and Aziz hadn't been the ones to distribute them all over campus. "Cool idea, though. Food. Dancing." He aimed a wink at Evie. "Fancy clothes."

"Sounds dumb," Mal griped, though to be fair she seemed to object to the thing on principal of the rhyming nature of its name. "And what the hell is 'Fall Ball Royalty'?"

"Something that I'm obviously going to win," Chad crowed. "And if I don't, it's because everyone was just intimidated."

"You say that about everything," Carlos muttered, though he mostly seemed confused again. "Do you guys do stuff like this all the time?"

"Not really?" Ben said. "Or, I mean, there's a lot of traditions – like the Spring Fling and Midsummer Festival and Yule feast – stuff like that, but this is um-" He brought the flyer closer to his face. "I really don't remember approving this."

"Maybe it was Fairy Godmother's idea?" Chad offered innocently. "Something to get the school's spirits up?"

"Yeah." Mal was back to frowning. "Have to get your spirits up from the weird group of villain kids you're hosting."

Okay, that was not the point.

"Mal-" Ben looked pained.

"What, you've got some sort of event you've never hosted before that just happens to coincide with our first semester here?" Mal asked. "Nice try, but no thanks." She crossed her arms. "Like I said, it sounds dumb."

Damage control. Damage control. Damage control needed to be done-

"Then why don't we have our own ball?" Chad found himself saying before he could think better of it.

The others collectively turned to stare at him.

"You know-" he continued, undeterred. "It's fishy, I get that. So we just- chill elsewhere." Maybe at the Enchanted Lake, since they ended up there all the time anyway. "We could go to Ben's castle!"

Chad hadn't been there in a while – he needed to rebug some of their computers anyway.

Ben didn't seem convinced. "I don't know guys, as future king-"

"It would be totally understandable for you to miss what is apparently a last-minute affair," Doug ventured quietly. "Since your schedule's planned so far out in advance."

Doug, you beautiful devil, you.

"So really, it would be more of a surprise if you actually went to the 'Fall Ball'." Chad was really getting behind making fun of the name. This was great. "Come on, Ben. Play hooky. Anti-ball. Anti-ball." Chad kept up his quiet chant until Carlos took pity on him and joined in, and then of course Jay couldn't be left out and Evie giggled along and even Doug was invested, all of them staring at the to-be King expectantly.

Eventually, Ben sighed. "Okay, okay. We'll have an anti-ball," he relented. "But if anyone asks, it's a secret retreat to review important security matters for Auradon."

"I mean, obviously," Mal drawled, and to her credit, Ben did smile.

So that was something.

-:-:-:-:-:-

"I can't believe you," Aziz grumbled as they finished making the menu selections for the catering team under Jane's watchful eye. "You're on the planning committee for this dumb, fake event and you're not even going."

"I think what you meant to say was 'good job, Chad, you dashing genius, you'," Chad griped with a roll of his eyes. "Because my totally brilliant plan will keep the VKs safe from any of Audrey's schemes, because they won't even be there- and," he continued, waving his pen in a flourish. "Ben won't be there either, so it won't be weird when he doesn't win Fall Ball King."

Aziz sniffed. "I could have theoretically beaten him."

"No, you couldn't have," Lonnie said without looking up from selecting table centerpieces from a catalogue.

"So in conclusion," Chad said, choosing a handful of hors d'oeuvres that he would never have to eat. "I am a genius, and you are all welcome."

"I don't get what Ben sees in you," Aziz grumbled, earning a crumpled up ball of paper to the head from an irritated Lonnie.

"Yeah, me neither," Chad agreed. "Here's to sentimentality."

"Yeah," Lonnie scoffed. "We're lucky Ben's so sentimental."

And then Aziz, Lonnie, and Jane did that weird eye thing where they thought they were leaving Chad out of something but the joke was on them because there was nothing to miss.

And Chad was a genius.

-:-:-:-:-:-

Endnotes:

Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter! Especially you, Guest! Your enthusiasm and feedback are greatly appreciated, thanks for taking the time to reach out to me. That goes for all you guys! :D

Story notes:

I have decided that if ever I need to create a superfluous social event for Auradon Prep, it shall forever be the 'Fall Ball'. Definitely using that one again in future stories ;P

And seriously, I don't hate Audrey – she's just in a position to be such a good bad guy that I had to take advantage of it.

Until next time :)