Did you know that you oftenly think about someone you hate the most? This is a story about it. Or it could be about the mind of wanting to protect someone. We behave almost differently than our mind. Maybe we don't even know what our minds are like. Watching our main character, hope you can feel how cool you can be when you honestly bring out the shabby heart that you're hiding.
I've been holding onto this for a really long time. I've tried to write this as perfectly as I love these girls, but I'm not sure it worked out. I tried to post it when everything was done, but it seems like a very distant future, so I post it when I'm not busy for a while.
(P.s. My English is terrible, but I just want to share it, so I translate it by myself and post it. I'm sure there are some strange sentences or words. If you see them, ignore them or let me know. I'd appreciate it if you'd.
But I can't even tell you when the next episode will come out. Though the story is already completed in my first language, it takes a lot of time to translate it. I'm sorry about that. Please pray for my poor English...)
Anyway, please attention this lovely sisters. Although the order one is not very lovely now, I think you will forgive her.
Please enjoy it!
After blowing a zombie's head off with an electric saw, Yukari threw the game controller on a sofa. Someone's hesitant footsteps were heard from the front door, along with the sound of a suitcase on the floor. As Yukari turned off the TV, which the zombies's screaming was blaring out, someone's footsteps stopped ringing. Yukari headed for the stairs opposite the front door without looking back. Sure enough, the stranger's eyes are on her back, and she, who was standing with dad opens her mouth as she will miss this chance.
"Hi, sis... Have you been well?"
Akari greeted her awkwardly. Yukari, who stopped in front of the stairs, almost snorted.
Of course, she couldn't have been well. Because that girl is why her mom left home. Dad cheated on mom. Besides, he made a baby. A baby who is only a year apart from his only daughter. But this guy cleared his throat like asking her to greet Akari.
Yukari turned her head and glared at her dad. He avoid her gaze but still held Akari's hand tightly. If she had left to her room when her dad's car was coming to the garage, she wouldn't have to seen such a scene. But if there's anyone here who should leave the most, it's the two of them, not herself. Of the two, especially the one who was born like a mistake and walked on her own feet into the house that she had ruined.
Yukari had to make sure of the fact. The reason she had to come down to the living room and play the crude graphic zombie game for hours was to ignore this shameless girl and guy.
Yukari didn't look at her face, which she didn't know how it had changed from five years ago. Also, she didn't want to know that the child grew in stature but still a handful smaller than herself. She could have replaced welcoming greetings her with curses, but she didn't want to see Akari's face distorted with cry. She has seen enough of such a scene, while she killed zombies.
'But why the hell did I have to do such a shoddy game?'
She thought, and in conclusion, annoyed by the girl who made her do so. Her will not to look at the unwelcome guest for about a week eventually went nowhere.
As their eyes met, Akari smiled softly. Despite her sister's eyes were sharp, she just seemed happy that her sister had looked at her. Five years ago, she often smiled like that. But her face was thinner than it was five years ago, and her face was not as bright as in those days. Yukari knew the reason. That's why Akari suddenly appeared, having her suitcase.
But still, Yukari had no choice but to say, as she did on one day five years ago, when she first met Akari without heard anything from her dad.
"Don't call me sis."
Yukari spit out each word aggressively. Then she turned away from Akari's trembling eyes and climbed the stairs. A little later, Dad's quiet voice came through the closed door of her room.
"Never mind, Akari... I'm sure she didn't mean that."
Akari replied soon. Maybe with a little smile on her face.
"I know, dad."
Yukari approached her desk and grabbed her headphones.
'Huh. What a laugh.'
Akari began to get her vision dirty not only at home but also at school. If her mother hadn't died of leukemia, Yukari wouldn't have to see her in even this place. Why does this high school put first and second graders in the same building? And whenever she passed by that pesky girl in the stairs, why does the girl always raise her hand to attract attention? Yukari's eyes are perfectly fine, and she just didn't look at what she didn't want to look. But Akari opened her mouth as if she thought her half-sister hadn't recognized this unwelcome girl because of her poor eyesight.
"Sister!"
If God or anyone give a chance to get rid of a single word in the world, she will choose it without a moment's hesitation. Yukari wore the headphones on her ears and blocked the tiresome voice.
On way home from school, Akari doubted her half-sister's hearing this time. Even though Yukari could have heard enough because she didn't wear headphones when riding her bicycle, Akari repeated "Sis, sis!" in a loud voice like a parrot that lost her master. However, the one who had of hearing problem was that girl. A few days ago, Yukari told her not to act like knew each other, but this girl was still chasing her half-sister like a puppy. The students standing in front of the crosswalk looked around, wondering about who the sister is. Yukari was just looking ahead as if she had nothing to do with her, and crossed the street as soon as the green light was on.
Even though she pretended to had impaired her vision and hearing, Akari kept coming. The school had even set up a restaurant and offered Yukari another chance to bump into the girl. Actually, she could eat lunch box in her classroom. But Wi-Fi was only working in the restaurant. She watched a video of game live throughout lunch, and someone she had been trying to forget during the time called in a bright voice as soon as she left the restaurant.
"Sis..."
"Don't talk to me."
Yukari tried to pass by, wearing her rabbit hood on her school uniform, but stopped. Somehow she thought she saw a familiar jumper, and of course, she didn't see it wrong. Yukari grabbed Akari's arm and headed to the corner of the hallway where there were no students. Get to a quiet stairwell, Yukari looked around roughly, and threw away Akari's arm. Then she said in a low voice.
"Take it off."
Akari who seemed pleased that Yukari didn't ignore her for the first time, was mumbled with a bewildered look.
"...huh?"
"Don't pretend you don't understand me, take the jumper off."
Yukari pointed to the jumper Akari wore. Exactly, it was her dad's jumper. It was laid on the sofa until morning, but when she take it? And why he gave it to her? Yukari didn't know this happened because she left home early as usual. It's because she didn't want to hear her dad's bullshit like "how about you give your sister a ride on your bicycle?" So if she would seen Akari wearing his jumper, she would have asked her right away.
"Why the hell are you wearing my dad's jumper?"
It didn't mean Dad's jumper didn't suit her. The black jumper suits her well to the point that everyone thinks she was just wearing a boxy. But it's Dad's. That's why she had no choice but to ask.
Akari didn't answer. But Yukari seemed to know why.
"Take it off."
Yukari warned. Akari gathered her jumper and muttered.
"No."
"I said to take it off."
"...no."
"Take the goddamn jumper off."
Akari shook her head without answer.
"I don't want to see you wearing it, so take it off now!"
Yukari finally shouted, pulling on her jumper sleeve. Then Akari said, "No...!" and began crying.
It was the same then and now. She didn't listen to her till Yukari was sick of it. And she had the most sad look on her face than anyone else, even though she had ruined somebody's family. In addition, she naver gave up, especially when it came to 'Dad.'
'But Dad was mine from the start. Not yours. That's why you shouldn't hold on to dad's jumper and be so pathetic in front of me. But why are you trying so hard not to take it away, as if it was yours? How come are you acting like he is yours?'
'Did you scattered a sense of shame at sea as you scattered your mother's ashes or what?!'
Yukari almost uttered the words out of her mouth. Whether Akari would cried more or not, she could have shouted so against her poor face. But it was an empty stairwell here, and she didn't want to hear her already unpleasant cry even louder. So Yukari swallowed the nasty words that came up to her throat, and just threw away Akari's sleeve as if she didn't care a bit of dad after all.
Akari, who was pushed with reactionary, looked up with her trembling eyes. Yukari looked at her wet eyes, and spat out her words coldly.
"Then don't show up in my sight."
Akari, however, had no intention of disappearing from her sight, only to look up at her quietly. So Yukari turned her back and erased Akari's tears from her sight.
It was not until evening that Akari appeared in her sight. Actually then Yukari left her room and came in the dining room. The table was full of meat as usual, and Dad put on a piece of steak on Akari's bowl, which was filled already mountain-high katsudon.
"Eat a lot, Akari."
"Thank you, dad."
"Here, Yukari..."
"I don't need it."
Yukari ate only a salad as small as bird feed. She had no appetite for days because of someone. But the someone who seems to have starved for years was already gulped down the half of her bowl. She really was, even though Dad refilled her bowl with a lot of meat constantly.
Each time Akari said, "That's enough, dad," but she ate it well.
"But my daughter looks so weak..." Dad replied, making his another daughter cringe.
Yukari put her chopsticks down and stand up from her seat. That was a perfect moment when the extra have to out of this third-rate drama.
"Yukari, why don't you eat meat..."
"Just feed it a lot your weak daughter."
Yukari went up to her room, thinking of cleaning people with a sniper rifle in PC monitor. Then suddenly Akari poked her head through the door that seemed to be closing. Yukari who was pushing the door thoughtlessly, caught the door handle quickly.
'Jesus Christ! Does she ever think before she tries to do something?'
As Yukari tries to complain about her lack of caution, which has not changed then and now, Akari carefully grasped the edge of the door and spoke first.
"Sis, just eat a little more..."
A sigh came out. Yukari hoped she was doing this to her because Dad made her do it. Maybe he really ordered her because he has a warm heart needlessly. But looking at those doggy eyes, she seemed to have a will of about 200 percent of her own. Now Yukari wanted to complain this vexing existence rather than her caution. But she didn't want to engage in another meaningless scuffle, as she did at school early, so spoke succinctly.
"If you don't wanna hurt your head, go down without a word."
"Come on, sis... If you keep eating too little..."
At that point, Yukari pushed the door, whether her forehead get hurt or not. The door, which had literally would have been block by 'a obstacle,' slammed unexpectedly. Yukari frowned, looking at the uninvited guest who was came into her room.
"Hey, I trying to say good way..."
"You're doing this because of Dad, right...? You're jealous because Dad keeps taking care of me, aren't you?"
Yukari, unknowingly, snorted at the words.
"Why should I be jealous of something like you because of such a man?"
"If you aren't, why don't you eat..."
Even before her saying finished, Yukari poked under Akari's collarbone, and her finger stayed the position. Akari looked up at Yukari and slightly grimaced her face with pain. Yukari glared at Akari's eyes, and said under her breath.
"THIS... is my answer."
Yukari only insinuated, but Akari must have understood. Akari's thin body, trembling from the tip of her strong finger, frozen at the moment.
Just before her bone was almost bruised, Yukari let down her finger. She then motioned toward the door with no sign of sympathy.
"You understood, huh? So get out."
Akari who losing focus of her eyes for a moment, took her hand near her clavicle as if she had been shot.
"...sis..."
Yukari bit her lips.
Again. She did it again. Akari often makes look like an abandoned dog begging to love her. Yukari haven't liked it the most since they first met. She felt like a bad person if she didn't accept it. But this puppy girl picked the wrong opponent. In Yukari's eyes, the girl only seem manipulative, and she didn't even look pathetic at all. She may have been getting what she wants that way, but not from now on.
"Don't call me sis. Don't look like that. Don't even smile. Don't be seen even at home except during mealtime."
When those words she snapped breathlessly were finished, a stillness prevail, and their eyes were intertwined in the heavy air. Akari only grasp the frill of her chest with her trembling hand, neither avoided her eyes nor rushed out.
The sparrow that used to be noisy a little while ago was disappeared to somewhere, and now, there was only a dog that kept her seat tenaciously. The dog probably will never move until she picks her up...
Just like that, Akari closed her mouth stubbornly and never gave an answer.
The next day and the next day, too. Whenever she could forget about her, Akari appeared and smiled and had a poor look and called her sis. It continued to the point where Yukari was tired of telling her not to.
Where does that incomprehensible persistent will come from? Yukari thought so, but in fact, it wasn't entirely unintelligible. Akari was such a tenacious girl even five years ago. But who has made such a girl more and more persistent was probably Yukari herself.
So, five years ago... she shouldn't have to do that.
Yukari had always regretted that day. She couldn't praise herself at all. If she could undo a single past, she would most like to turn it around. Everything was a mess that year, and it seemed like the happening made a more mess of the future. If it weren't for at least that happening, things might have gotten a little bit less bad.
But Yukari knew that. Even if she went back to that time, she probably would have to do the same thing.
Still, Yukari didn't know why. That's exactly incomprehensible thing.