"What the fuck! Kathryn you said no one was home! Jacob said except. I wasn't really listening. I could hear voices but as if I was underwater and the voices came from the surface above me.

I opened my eyes and everything was still spinning. I thought I heard his voice, Jacob got off of me. I couldn't gather myself. I could feel he was running out of the room. I was so confused.

"Wait Jake."

"Well to be fair my sister didn't know I'd be home."

Sister? I wasn't hearing right. No I was just high. God Blaine said not do this anymore for a reason. Not to mix, not to even try oxy again. And to stop messing with cocaine but I couldn't because last time i felt him too. Maybe this is rock bottom. I finally opened my eyes and sat up. My head was still spinning.

And then I saw him.

"Well you seem off sis!"

I couldn't believe this, it was him I must have Od'd.

"I'm I dead?" I just ran up to him and hugged him.

"Kathryn , are you ok? " I pulled Kathryn off me, I was shocked she would receive me with such excitement. She was high out of her mind.

And just like that she fainted. Kathryn fell unconscious.

I woke up , shocker in the hospital, again it's the third time this month, fuck. After this time my mom might really send me away to Europe for Rehab. I wonder if Jacob called the ambulance. Or if I did? Everything felt so cloudy. The nurse came in. Apparently they had to pump my stomach or Gastric Suction which I've only ever had that done once well twice now. The nurse went on about the severity of my problem. And that was at risk of being underweight. The conversation seemed like 12 hours. But she finally discharged me. I saw clothes on the counter. Weird. I got dressed.

I couldn't find my phone, maybe I left it at home.

"Looking for this?" Sebastian Valmont dressed in a stunning hugo boss outfit, his iconic black well tailored black button down paired with black pants. He looked like a prince from hell. He walked towards me and gave me my cell phone.

I was in shock.

"Well I can't believe I've made you speechless, all these years of me trying and trying. Who knew me coming back from the dead was the only way to make you tongue-tied." He said with a smug smile

" You're not fucking real." I must still be sleeping or maybe at this point I've completely lost it.

"Baby, I'm as real as this". He said as he came close to me and touched my cheek. He was so close to me I could smell him. I looked up and his eyes met mine. His deep ocean eyes. And I just pulled him into me.

I kissed him hungrily and ferocious, as if I was blood - thirsty for him. And I was. He kissed me back just with the same intensity. Suddenly I stopped and he looked at me again.

"WHAT THE FUCK YOU FUCKING BASTARD". I say half heartedly.

"Kathryn this could wait till I get you home." He was calm and put together what the hell was wrong with him!

"The fuck not, I'm not going anywhere with you!"

"I" Sebastian starts explaining until his phone answers and he picks it up. How fucking dare he.

"Hang the phone up right now or so help me God you'll wish you'll be dead."

"Hey stop that"! Sebastian says as I start smacking his arm so he fucking acknowledges me.

"We have to get home , my dad and Tiffany are on their way from the airport." Sebastian Says.

"Wait did you dad knew all this time that you're alive?"

"Please I promise to tell you everything, let's just go home."

We got home a couple of hours ago. We all fought. Turns out good ol Edward fucking knew Sebastian has been alive for almost a fucking year. What's worse is that my own mother knew too. They found out 2 months ago. She saw me suffering and did nothing. And Edward he made this fucking charade of adopting me and changing my last name as threat to Sebastian if he didn't come back, I would be benefitary of Valmont Enterprises and I would own all of Sebastian's shares.

I could hear my mother and Edward arguing downstairs. Well back to normal I guess. Fucking Sebestian. Of course that little son of a bitch didn't die. As my dad would say "Hierba mala nunca muere" which means that a shitty annoying weed never fucking dies. I couldn't gather my thoughts. So of course I acted on impulse. I sent a dm to my fave instagram upper east side gossip profile with a picture well countless pictures of everyone's favorite bad boy's reincarnation. Sebastian would pay for either not staying dead, coming back and faking it. Looks like Blaine and the whole world including Annette are going to find out Sebastian is alive through social media ahahah.

"Kathryn , open the door please, I'm begging you, I need to talk to you". I open the door to my room.

"You already explained why you faked dying Sebastian, I don't need to fucking hear it again or in the matter of case see you again."

" No I wanted to talk…"

I cut him off. And I open the door.

" About? About what ? You abandoning everyone to play Mr. I am not a miserable piece of shit in another country? Face it SEBASTIAN you can't fucking run from yourself because guess what you'll go everywhere you try to escape."

"Oh so what should I do Kat ? Fucking drown myself in drugs and sex and try to kill myself"?

"I wasn't trying to kill myself. I was just, I have been going through things. But that doesn't mean you have the right to come into my life police it while you are a fucking coward."

"Don't call me that!"

"Or what you'll hit me again?"

"Stop it!" He yelled, tears forming in my eyes. I just look at him helplessly.

He walked away from me and went to my dresser, opened the middle drawer and took my oxy pill box, my cocaine and my weed.

"I thought you were fucking done with his shit since Annette exposed you."

"No, your little southern bitch made me worse. Now nobody expects anything from me, I don't have to hide, I also can fuck whoever I want. You were right , it is good to be yourself."

"I didn't mean this Kat, I meant , look you need help. My father called me and said, ``You're spiraling out. "'

"Oh so now you've come to save me, and finally be my prince charming baby". I say while cornering him. He doesn't get to be in control. He just stares at me, he can see through it. He knows all I want to do is have him hold me while I sob.

"Kathryn I still care", he whispers his forehead and mine are touching. He places a hand on my waist.

"No you don't get to fucking do that"! I say as I start crying. I moved away from him. "I fucking grieved you Sebastian, I am still grieving you! How dare you leave me. Why?"

"Kathryn, I am so sorry, I needed to break out of here, it's like this fucking city doesn't let you breathe sometimes."

"I know but that's why we had each other"!

"I had to get away from you from all the fucking games that destroyed us". He said desperately.

I hated his fucking guts right now. But in the end I almost felt happy. Happy that the nightmare of him being gone was nothing but a nightmare. I will make him pay but I need him. I still need him.

He walked out of my room.

That night I was tossing and turning. I couldn't sleep. My heart was beating so fast and loud. If I could count my heart beats they would be like 178 per minute even though that might be my anxiety talking. I felt very antsy.

I walked to Sebastian's room. I opened the door and made myself to the bed. He was sleeping. I came from the left side and tried very quietly to get into the bed.

"What"? Sebastian said in a sleepy manner. He turned on the lamp that was next to his night stand.

"Kathyrn"?

"Hey I couldn't sleep and actually I've been sleeping here for the last couple of months and I was wonder…"

He cut me off.

"Yes come, sorry I was half asleep". He unmade the left side of the bed. And stared at me.

Ok yes so I might have changed into a sexier slip before coming to his room. I know he must still hate me but if he desires me then I can work with that.

"You always look that good when you're going to sleep"? He tells me, I think he's actually flirting. Kinda it feels weird.

I just smile and bite my lip. I climb into bed.

"I just missed you , a lot actually if I'm being honest. " I can't believe I just told him that, why do I fucking feel like a fourteen year old girl.

"I'm sorry Kathryn, you're right , I am a coward and I ran away from my problems and you"

"Hey hey shh don't ruin this". I move closer to him.

"Sebastian"?

"Yes , Kat"

"I need you".

Before he can say anything I get on top of him. His hands immediately go to my waist almost like an instant reaction.

"what "? he says puzzled.

"I want you to fuck me Sebastian, please I need you inside me".

"Kat , I want you too, so much. I thought about you everyday.

"Then what are you waiting for"?

He flipped me I was underneath him he kissed my forehead and kissed me longingly as if he had never kissed me before. I started crying.

"Please don't leave me".

"I won't, never again. I promise."

"I'm sorry to ruin the mood I just, it's been hard"

"You didn't ruin anything Kathryn, It's been a tough day for both of us. "

I tangled my fingers into his curly blonde hair.

"You're still very much irresistible but we can honestly do it tomorrow. It doesn't need to be right now"

"Haha , that's very highly of you to assume i'll let you fuck me tomorrow." I say.

"I know you will."

"How"? I challenge him.

"Because I know you aren't wearing any underwear and you're wet."

"Mhm you do know me Sebastian". I say as I turn to face him and i lick his neck."

"Ok now stop teasing me and go to sleep"!