Shinji's Redemption
Chapter 5
Shinji opened his eyes. His vision was wavy and he felt a warm sensation all around his body.
"I'm dreaming," Shinji said. When he went to exhale, air bubbles escaped his mouth. Shinji realized he was underwater. He started to panic until he realized he could still breathe. Shinji looked up and saw the surface of the water. The sun glittered through the water, refracting light into his eyes. He started to swim up, but the water was just pulling him back down. Shinji slowly floated down into the sand. He grabbed a handful of sand and watched it slowly spread in the water. He closed his eyes and fell asleep.
Shinji awoke to the sound of chirping birds. He looked up to see his familiar ceiling. Shinji always hated waking up. When he was a little kid he would just stay in bed for hours, even after waking up. After awhile Shinji finally got out of his bed and put on some clothes. He looked over to the easel, which held the canvas Misato gave him. On his shelf was a couple of brushes and paints. Nothing too fancy, just the basic colors. Shinji sat in the stool that Misato brought in for him. He looked at the canvas and sighed. He had no idea what to paint. It was like staring into an empty void. Filled with nothing but empty space. "How do people do this?" Shinji asked himself. Shinji got up from the stool and walked out of his room.
Today was Saturday if Shinji remembered correctly. A week from tomorrow is when he's supposed to meet Asuka on the Over The Rainbow. The idea of seeing Asuka again terrified Shinji. He never understood her, she would always push people away, not that Shinji didn't do that either. But she was different, she would do it by choice, with Shinji he did it because he simply was too scared to deal with others. He always hated how she would bully him around, she would constantly bicker about him and how much of a coward he was. He hated it because he knew it was true. He hated that she always felt that she needed to one-up everybody, yet he envied her. The way she carried herself, how she never backed down. He was taken out of his trance by Misato calling him from the kitchen.
"Hey, Shinji! You up yet?" Misato yelled rather loudly. She hadn't had her beer yet today, plus she was especially tired from the Jet Alone situation.
"Yeah," Shinji said sluggishly. He walked into the kitchen to start cooking breakfast. He was just setting the table when the doorbell rang.
"I'll go get it," Misato said irritably. She walked over to the door and opened it. She was greeted by a certain Kensuke and Toji.
The two boys were not expecting to see such a beautiful woman in pajamas. Toji was the first to come out of awe.
"Uh, My name is Toji Suzuhara, and this is Kensuke Aida!" Toji said.
"Oh, you're the two from the fourth angel attack," Misato said, now recognizing them.
"Yes! We're really sorry for the trouble we caused!" Kensuke apologized. The two of them bowed.
"It's all well and good. Besides, I'm sure Intel gave you quite an earful." She jokingly said. Toji and Kensuke cringed remembering the process that took place to sign those contracts.
"Is Shinji here?" Kensuke asked.
"Yes, we were just about to start eating, you want to join us." Misato invited.
"If it's alright. We don't mean to interrupt," Toji said. Misato just chuckled.
"It's fine. Shinji makes plenty of food." Misato said. The two boys walked into the kitchen to see a table filled with all sorts of delights. The two boys sat down to eat. As soon as they put the food in their mouths, the two boys assaulted the rest of the food on the table. After they were done there was nothing left. Misato laughed. "Well, it looks like you two boys enjoyed your meal," Misato said. Both Toji and Kensuke thanked her for the meal.
'I'm the one who cooked it," Shinji muttered.
"Oh look at the time. I have to go to work." Misato said. She walked over into her room. Toji broke his lovestruck attitude. He grabbed Shinji by his shoulders and started to shake him.
"Dude! You didn't tell us you lived with a smoking hot chick!" Toji said. He stopped shaking Shinji. He and Kensuke whispered to each other. Shinji just sighed. He always hated how they glamoured over her. He knew why they did, she was one of the most beautiful women he knew. But what they didn't see was how sloppy she was. Misato walked out of her room wearing her Nerv uniform. Toji and Kensuke quickly shot their heads over towards Misato.
"Shinji, I'm going to be out extra late tonight. Just order some take out." Misato said. She cheerfully waved to the boys while walking out the door. Shinji rolled his eyes and cleaned the kitchen. He was drying the last dish when Toji spoke up.
"Hey Shinji, you ever been to the mountains?" Toji asked. Shinji looked at him with a curious expression.
"No, not really." Shinji lied. When he went to the mountains after his fight with the third angel. It was during the time where he ran away. He ran to the mountains because that's where he knew he could be alone.
"Well then let's go!" Kensuke eagerly shouted. Toji just smiled. Shinji looked at the two boys with a troubled expression. It's not that he didn't want to go, it's just that he didn't want to worry anybody by being gone.
"Are you sure that it's okay for us to go there without supervision?" Shinji said. Toji and Kensuke groaned in unison.
"It's only an overnight thing! The mountains are just outside of Tokyo-3, we'll be fine." Toji reassured. Shinji didn't look convinced, so he called Misato. She didn't seem too thrilled about the idea at first, but then said it would be good for him. Shinji went to go pack for a hike in the mountains. As he was putting his backpack on he looked at his canvas. He looked at it for a while. A loud knock on his door interrupted his thinking.
"Heya, Shinji? You done in there?" Toji asked.
"Yeah, just hold on a sec," Shinji said. He went over to his desk and picked up Misato's necklace and put it in his pocket. Shinji walked out of his bedroom. Toji and especially Kensuke was waiting impatiently at the front door of the apartment.
After they left they went to Toji's house. Shinji and Kensuke walked inside. While Shinji waited for Toji to Finnish packing, he walked around his apartment. Shinji couldn't help but be curious. After he was done He sat near the coffee table in the living room. He noticed a picture of Toji and his sister. Shinji visibly frowned at the photo. Kensuke walked over to Shinji and saw his frown.
"Hey what's-" Kensuke didn't finish. He looked at Shinji then at the photo. He was about to say something until Toji walked into the living room.
"Alright Kensuke, we better hurry. Knowing you, you're gonna take forever to pack!" Toji said. He noticed that Shinji and Kensuke didn't look the same as they did just moments ago. He then noticed the picture frame on the coffee table. He looked at Shinji and sighed.
"She didn't deserve to die, she really didn't. But if you wouldn't have fought that angel, a whole lot more of us would be dead." Toji said. "Don't beat yourself up over it, Shinji. You're doing something most people can't do. If anything It should have been me in that damn robot." Toji admitted. "C'mon, let's go," Toji said.
Toji packed very lightly, in fact, the only thing he really packed was food. After that, they went to Kensuke house in the woods. Shinji forgot how far out he really lived, Kensuke had to take a bus to get to the train station, then had to catch a train to get to school in time. Shinji couldn't imagine doing that. Luckily he was within walking distance of the school.
Toji and Shinji waited for Kensuke outside on the picnic table in his front hard. Shinji looked around Kensuke's yard. The yard was pretty barren, the only thing he saw was a fort made out of sandbags, with some dummy soldiers. In the woods, Shinji saw what looked like a shed. Shinji's thoughts were interrupted by Toji.
"Oh my god," Toji said while facepalming. Kensuke walked out looking like he was preparing for war, which in his mind he was. Shinji thought he over packed. He carried an extra set of clothes, some food and water, a sleeping bag, and a first aid kit. Kensuke wore tan cargo shorts with a black tank top. Over that, he wore a green cargo jacket. Over his chest was a camera case. But that all paled in comparison that was his backpack. Toji just sighed and started to walk towards the bus station. Shinji and Kensuke followed suit.
It was late evening and the stars were shining in the sky. Toji was setting up the tent and Kensuke was setting up the wood for the fire. Shinji was gathering the MREs Kensuke packed for tonight. Shinji had to do a double-take to make sure he was seeing that right. As far as Shinji knew, you could only get those if your officially part of the JSDF, so where Kensuke got them he had no idea. Shinji rubbed his ankles. Shinji liked walking, it relaxed him. Walking up a mountain, however, was something Shinji didn't enjoy. He would probably enjoy it more if Kensuke didn't keep rushing him and Toji.
"Ow, son of a bitch!" Toji yelled. He rubbed his finger in pain. He accidentally hit his finger with the mallet, nailing the tent down.
"I told you to be careful," Kensuke said. Shinji walked over to his backpack and pulled out a bandage and ointment for Toji's finger.
"Here," Shinji said. Toji rubbed the ointment on his finger. The throbbing instantly went away. He wrapped the bandage around his finger.
"Thanks, " Toji said. Kensuke set up the fire spit. Shinji looked at the ground.
"No problem," Shinji said. Shinji Set up the MREs to cook. Kensuke kept to the fire while they all sat on the ground. After they were done eating Shinji looked up at the starts. The mountains were far enough away from Tokyo-3 to not be affected by light pollution. Ever since the third impact, the celestial sphere was stuck in place. In order to see other constellations, you had to travel towards the equator, most of which was flooded. Toji turned to Shinji and saw he was staring up.
"Whatcha lookin' at?" Toji asked. Shinji pointed towards the sky.
"I was looking at Lyra," Shinji said. Toji looked at Shinji like he was crazy.
"It's a constellation, you moron!" Kensuke laughed. Toji looked bewildered.
"How can you tell? They all just look like dots!" Toji defended. Shinji smiled.
"Do you see the brightest ones? Just connect the dots." Kensuke advised. Toji looked into the sky and squinted. He then looked back down and shrugged. Kensuke just laughed. Shinji pulled out his small sketchbook. He bought it so he could write down or draw any ideas for his painting. So far nothing had come to him. Shinji looked up into the sky and drew out the constellations. He tore out the page and gave it to Toji. He held it up towards the sky.
"Oh, now I see!" Toji said. Shinji smiled.
"If you look over there, you can see Jupiter and Saturn," Shinji said.
"When did you learn about the celestial sphere?" Kensuke asked. Shinji looked down at the ground.
"When I was little I lived in a small forest. I would often go outside to look at the sky." Shinji said. When he lived with his teacher, he would often read her astronomy books before he went to sleep.
"It's amazing. Humans are so small in comparison to the universe." Kensuke said.
"What do you mean?" Toji asked. Shinji looked up into the sky.
"Humans are explorers, maybe that's why the universe is so big," Shinji said. Toji and Kensuke burst out laughing. Shinji couldn't help but chuckle at himself.
"I didn't know you were a philosopher, Shinji!" Toji chuckled. Shinji just smiled. Kensuke poked at the fire.
"It's getting late, we should head to bed," Kensuke said. The boys put out the fire and went into the tent. They got into their sleeping bags and continued to talk about the universe. Before they knew it they were asleep.
Shinji blinked. He was staring up at the sky, it was a vibrant blueish orange and the sky held many stars. He looked down and saw the water reflected the sky, making it look like he was floating in space. Shinji lifted his hand out of the water, he could feel almost every grain of sand fall from his palm. Shinji stood up and strangely enough, he was completely dry. The only sound was the waves in the ocean and the air tasted like salt. Shinji could feel the water wrap around his feet and toes. The only thing he wore was his joggers and an unbuttoned shirt.
"I'm dreaming again," Shinji said to himself. He looked behind him he was on a beach of an island. Shinji started walking along the edge of the island. He didn't know how long he walked for, but eventually he came up to a small pier. Shinji noticed a young boy sitting at the end of the pier. Towards the horizon, Shinji noticed Unit 01 with its knees in the water. Shinji walked up to the boy. He had short brown hair and dark blue eyes. The boy held a frown while looking into the distance. Shinji looked at the boy.
"What's wrong?" Shinji asked.
"It isn't fair." The boy said. Shinji sat by the young boy.
"I know," Shinji said. The boy kept looked down at the water. The waves crashed against the wooden posts.
"Why does it have to be me?" the boy asked. Shinji didn't answer immediately, he looked out to look at Unit 01. Shinji looked at the boy.
"Maybe you're the only one who can do it," Shinji said. The boy looked at Shinji.
"What if I'm not good enough?" asked the boy. Shinji looked at his scarred hand. He thought about Kenzo.
"Do what you can. It may not seem like it, but you have everything you need," Shinji said with a smile. The boy started crying. Shinji hugged the young boy. They stayed like that for a while. The young boy stared at Shinji.
"What's your name?" Shinji looked out towards Unit 01.
"Shinji," he said. The young boy smiled, and then Shinji awoke.
"Wake up, sleepyhead!" Toji yelled. Shinji shot awake. Toji's voice rang through Shini's head.
"Told ya it would work!" Toji said to Kensuke, who was preparing breakfast.
"I thought you would never wake up? Kensuke complained. Shinji wriggled out of his sleeping bag and packed up his things. After the boys ate breakfast, they walked back to the bus station. After Kensuke and Toji got off the bus, Shinji was left by himself. It was early in the morning, so few people were out and about. The sun was just rising out of the shadow of the mountains. The rolling hills just outside Tokyo-3 shone a bright green. Shinji pulled out his sketchbook. He sketched out the view of Tokyo-3 and the hills before it. The sketch wasn't all that impressive, but Shinji was proud of what he managed to do. He would have drawn more, but the overhead speaker announced the next stop.
Shinji walked into the apartment. He walked over to his room and unpacked. He looked over at his canvas. He took out his Tokyo-3 sketch. He sat down on the stool and took out all the brushes and paints. He took was about to make the first brush, but stopped. He picked his SDAT and started to listen to it. At first, he wasn't sure how to go about actually painting, but before long, he got comfortable with his style. Before he knew it he was done with his painting. He painted Tokyo-3, but the sky was like the one he had in his dream. The lake by Tokyo-3 Reflected Unit 01. By the end of it, all Shinji was a mess. Before he started to paint, he put on a plain white tank top and blue shorts, both of which were completely covered in paint. The towel he used to prevent the floor from getting dirty was completely ruined. Other than that the painting was completed with little to no mess. All it had to do now was dry, Shinji carefully carried it outside towards the veranda. After he was done cleaning up he went to go take a shower.
After letting it dry for a couple of hours Shinji bought back the painting into his room. He put it back on the easel and walked out of his room into the kitchen. He started to cook some lunch. Misato was still asleep, he couldn't blame her. She worked six days out of the week and worked past midnight. The least he could do is cook for her every now and then. As if on cue, Misato walked out of her room. She walked over to the fridge to get out a beer.
"Ah! That hit the spot!" Misato exclaimed. Shinji just rolled his eyes. As they were eating Misato noticed a blue splotch on his hand.
"What's that on your hand?" Misato asked. Shinji looked at it.
"It's just paint, I guess I didn't wash it off very well," Shinji said. Misato's face lit up.
"You finally painted?" Misato said eagerly. Shinji held a nervous smile.
"It's not much," Shinji said.
"Oh come on! Let me see it!" Misato said. Shinji sighed and went to his room to pick up his painting he came back with his painting facing him. He reluctantly turned it to show Misato. She looked at the painting for what seemed like minutes.
"Uh...Misato?" Shinji said. Misato kept looking at the painting.
"Shinji...It's beautiful."