A/N Well, here we are at Chapter 80. Five more chapters and one epilogue to go. There is another note at the end.

Chapter 80

Headington, UK, 6:30 PM Friday December 28th 2012.

Leonard had been reading the university guides since he got back to Geoff's. There was a knock on the door and Leonard said, "Come in."

Geoff opened the door and looked in and said, "I'm going to pick out the wine for dinner, would you like to come along and see my wine cellar?"

"Sure," said Leonard as he got up.

Geoff led Leonard toward his cellar, and said, "It's not really a wine cellar in the conventional sense, but I have several refrigerated storage units. It is normally quite cool down here, for those wines don't need refrigeration, but are better cool."

The room was small and felt damp, with three large units with glass doors on them, the five racks in each held dozens of bottles. Geoff explained the different wines, where they were from, the grape varieties, and what they usually were paired with. As they were having fish tonight, Geoff took a white wine out, and brought it to the dining room. Over dinner, Geoff explained how he had been using the university spectrum analyzer to try to determine what chemicals, in the wine, gave the wine it's taste. After dinner, Geoff and Leonard helped clear the table, and then Geoff took Leonard to his closet, so he could see the type of clothing, an Oxford professor was expected to wear.

He and Geoff spent over an hour looking through Geoff's clothes, and now Leonard had a better idea of academic, lounge, and formal wear. He also understood the two different gowns he would be required to wear. Leonard was concerned, as he had never really been required to wear such clothing. Priya, and to a lesser extent, Penny, had tried to get him to change the clothing he wore, but he was still comfortable wearing T-shirts and hoodies. After reading the guides and seeing Geoff's clothes, he realized those types of clothes were a thing of the past for him, as a faculty member here.

He understood he was going to have to buy the clothing he needed. Fortunately, Geoff knew a shop where Leonard could get such clothing, and promised to take him there, when the shop opened after New Year's. Meanwhile, Geoff told him the two suits he had brought would be passable, until he could get proper clothes, since he wouldn't be meeting any students. They finally walked back out to the living room, and spent the rest of the evening talking, along with Geoff's wife, and sipping wine. It was just after 10 PM, when they all went to bed.

Apt 314 7:00 PM Friday December 28th 2012.

Jeanie was watching TV, when she heard the door to Penny's room open. Penny came out, rather meekly, walking to the couch, sitting down and saying to Jeanie, "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For yelling at you," said Penny, sounding sad. "For not accepting what you were telling me, for…for…for everything."

"Penny, it's OK," said Jeanie. Penny looked absolutely devastated, so Jeanie took her hand, while she tried to console her, "From what I know, you were raped, and it's not easy to come to terms with that. Most women try to deny it, thinking if they don't think about it, it will go away. God knows I would have a very difficult time with it, but, can you tell me why you refused to believe it, when I told you?"

Penny looked like she was going to cry, but didn't, "It's just…just…I've been drunk before, where I'd have sex with someone I may not have had sex with, if I'd been sober. And in most of those cases the guy was drunk too…"

"Penny, it doesn't matter if the guy was drunk," said Jeanie, "If you were too drunk to give consent…"

"I know, I know," said Penny, sounding frustrated. "I get that now, but if we were both drinking, I…I…guess I can justify it, at least in my mind. But, this makes me feel dirty and used…I was deliberately drugged, and had sex forced on me. But, I went to his place, so I've got to be partly to blame…"

"No, you are not. That is just a rationalization," said Jeanie, "and that is also something that happens to rape victims. You are blaming yourself, and you can't do that. And, his using drugs to get you incapacitated is no different from someone else using alcohol, it's a drug too."

"But…"

"No buts, Penny," said Jeanie. "You need to come to terms that it wasn't your fault, that someone else is to blame. You have to acknowledge that it happened, yes, but also know it's not your fault. There's a lot of subtlety in this type of situation, you really need to see a therapist to sort it all out."

"That's all great for me, but what can I do about him?" asked Penny. "I can't go to the police, it's been too long. I thought I was just drunk, so I have no evidence. And without evidence, I can't accuse him of doing anything."

"Penny," said Jeanie, "unless we can get some evidence, there's nothing we can do, legally to him."

Penny asked, "Do any of the other women have any evidence?"

Jeanie shook her head, "No, none of them have any proof either, so, like I said, noting legally we can do."

Jeanie could see tears forming in Penny's eyes as she said, "He's going to get away with this, isn't he? He'll do it again to other women and there's nothing I can do to stop him."

"Actually Penny," said Jeanie, "there is something we can do. Now, we can't flat out accuse him, because we have no evidence, but you can tell your story."

"But what good does that do?" asked Penny.

"In this business, it will get around, and that may help other women be more careful with him. For example, some of my actress friends have recently told me stories about the head of our network coming on to them, even if they didn't want it."

Penny looked shocked, "Les Moonves?"

Jeanie nodded, "I've also heard some women talk about their experience with a famous comedian and actor. He had a big show in the 80s, who may have drugged 60 women or more, then took advantage of them."

"I've heard a couple of stories also, I think you're talking about Bill…"

"Yeah, it's him, but see, women just told their experience with both of them. The stories weren't accusatory, just what they experienced, and those stories got around. So now, if I were with them, I would be very careful. I wish I would have heard the stories about Brent, before this, so I could have warned you.

"I should have know better," said Penny. "I thought he was creepy to begin with, and I should have know better than go with him..."

"Dammit, Penny," said Jeanie harshly, "get it through your head, this wasn't your fault. Got it?"

"Fine, it's not my fault, but this doesn't help me right now," said Penny bitterly. "It leaves me having to put my life back together, and I really can't say anything directly to him."

"No, you can't," said Jeanie, "except maybe to tell him to stay away from you. But, remember, I'll be there to walk with you to your dressing room, so you won't have to deal with him."

Penny didn't look happy, "He'll still be around, to remind me, along with the scenes I'll have with him."

Jeanie could see Penny starting to tear up, and didn't blame her. She thought about a way to get her to think about something else. "How about you help me make us some dinner? We can try to find something else to talk about, try to keep your mind off of it."

Penny nodded, but before they could get up, Penny collapsed into Jeanie, sobbing loudly. Jeanie put her arms around her, and just let her cry. I've got to tell Kelli or Jim what is going on, thought Jeanie.

Apt 4A 7:30 PM Saturday December 29th 2012.

Raj was watching Sheldon working on three different whiteboards. He would do some calculations, then move terms to another board. Occasionally, he'd look at the various sheets of paper scattered on the coffee table, nodding his head. Raj recognized a lot of the terms on the boards, but he had never seen them put together quite the way Sheldon had them in the equations. Raj had tried to ask about the equations several times, but Sheldon had cut him off, except for telling him he was trying to convert General Relativity equations into Quantum equations. Raj had asked about Amy, and Sheldon had said Amy was in her room, working on her project. He also said he had sent her there when she continued to talk, while she worked, and Raj should take the hint.

Raj did, leaving soon after. He had stopped by Howard and Bernadette's place, before going to 4A, but they weren't home. Since he had nowhere else to go, he stopped by Marie Callender's, bought a pie, and decided to take it home, instead of eating it in the car. While he ate the pie at home, he worried about how much weight he would put on, but he felt alone. With Penny and Leonard gone, the group meals in 4A had mostly stopped. And, now, with everyone else seemingly working on a new project, his group of friends were too busy for him. Well, he had plans for New Year's Eve. There was a party he knew about, and if he had a couple of beers before going, he should be able to talk to any of the women there. With that, he stopped eating the pie, worrying about if he would fit into the suit he planned to wear.

Headington, UK, 3:30 PM Sunday December 30th 2012.

Leonard was going through his luggage, putting things into two piles, one for his office, the other for his rooms. He would be getting his 'Bod Card' tomorrow, along with getting added to the list of faculty allowed to eat in the dinning hall, so he could start booking meals. He would also be getting his office tomorrow, and while there wasn't a lot of his things, for the office at present, he would make arrangements for the rest of his things to be delivered next week. He planned to put the things he had with him in their proper place. While he was very grateful for Geoff and his wife putting him up, he was sure they would want their privacy back, so Leonard would be moving in to his rooms in Kettell Hall, the day after New Year's Day.

Leonard finished separating his things, and then packed them in different pieces of luggage. Geoff was going to take him in, so he could get his office partially set up, taking Leonard's other things to his room, then going to Geoff's clothier, on Thursday. With the separation done, Leonard laid on the bed and wondered how his friends were doing, and also thought about Penny. He had been busy since arriving in the UK, and hadn't had time to think about her. But now, with nothing really to do, he was wondering how she was. He was sure he had made the right decision to leave, but he was thinking about how much he missed her.

Apt 314, NY, 6:30 PM Sunday December 30th 2012.

Jeanie had been staying at Penny's for the last two days, ever since she had told Penny about the other women's experience with Brent. She had expected Penny's reaction to be negative, and wanted to be there for her. But, now, she was starting to get worried about her, as Penny had done nothing but sit there and watch TV. Actually, Jeanie noticed, she wasn't really watching, just staring at it, as programs changed. Jeanie had tried talking to her, but Penny was only giving short answers, if she answered at all, and she was still avoiding talking about what had happened.

When Jeanie pressed her about how she felt, Penny finally admitted the feeling of sadness she had, from breaking up with Leonard, had intensified. But, that wasn't as strong as the negative feelings about her life now, with the realization that she had been raped. She felt helpless and felt her life was out of her control. In addition, in some way, she felt 'dirty', like she was used goods, although she couldn't really explain it. She now remembered trying to scrub Brent off of her, in the shower, after getting home. Jeanie's biggest worry was Penny's saying she just didn't really care about anything, at the moment. Penny also mentioned feeling even stronger about not wanting to go back to the show, not wanting to continue in the business, and most of all, not wanting to have to deal with Brent.

While Jeanie could understand that, she also knew that there were other things that Penny wasn't taking into account, but she didn't want to push her on this right now, with everything else she was dealing with. She was also trying to figure out a way to approach Jim and Kelli about this. To try and help Penny start thinking about something else, she asked Penny to think about going to Times Square, for the ball drop, for New Years. Penny told Jeanie she'd think about it, but Jeanie noticed that her face was expressionless, with a vacant look in her eyes.

Trinity College, Oxford, 11:00 AM Monday December 30th 2012.

Leonard was waiting at the desk of Mr Cooke, while Geoff was talking to Mrs Hansen. Mr Cooke came back and handed Leonard a card with dark blue writing, his name, department and college, it had a magnetic strip and lots of small print, on the back.

Mr Cooke, with an air of distain said, "This is your so called 'Bod Card'. I prefer it's proper name: the Bodliean Library Card. However, it's been highjacked for other purposes and its name shortened. As a reminder, it will get you into any buildings or school rooms you have been granted access to, dining hall, your room, your office, etc. It's also, as the proper name suggests, your library card, usable at any of the Oxford libraries. You can also book your meals with this."

"Dr Whatney had given us your building and office and those have been added to the card. You will have to find which parts of your department you are allowed in, so your department can add those."

Mr Cooke continued, "We have arranged for them to hook up your internet and television service on the second, and we'll contact you when that is complete. I don't know if you want to move in now, or wait until we have your television and internet hooked up."

"I'll be staying with Dr Whatney until the second," said Leonard, "so I'll be moving in then."

"Very good," said Mr Cooke, "After you move in, if you have any questions please let me know. I'm here every weekday. If it's during the weekend or after office hours, please see me the next business morning."

Leonard thanked him, and he and Geoff left. They went to Kettell Hall, to see if Leonard's card worked. It did, and Leonard again looked into the room. After that, he and Geoff left, with Geoff taking him to the physics complex known as the Clarendon Laboratory, and showing him how to get to the laboratory from his rooms.

Once there, Geoff found a place to park and then took Leonard to the Lindemann building, letting Leonard use his card, it opened the door, and Geoff led him to the third floor, and to a door, 308, Leonard noted. Using his card again, he opened the door, and entered. He could see a large window, behind a rather large desk, with a computer screen and phone on it. Also in the room were quite a few bookcases, along with a loveseat, chair and a table, and on one wall, a large whiteboard.

Leonard was impressed with his office. While it was about half the size of his lab/office at CalTech, it didn't have any equipment in it, so though it was somewhat smaller, he paradoxically, had much more room. Geoff asked if there was anything else he wanted to see, and Leonard said no, he would ask for a formal tour after the school opened next week. Leonard had brought the piece of luggage containing his office things, and he left that piece in the office, then he and Geoff left.

On the way to Geoff's, Leonard asked if there was anything planned for New Year's Eve, and Geoff told him just the usual. After Leonard asked about what was usual, Geoff explained that he and his wife traditionally had some wine, meats, and cheeses around midnight, as they watched Jools Holland. Leonard had no idea what that was and asked. As Geoff explained, Leonard realized that it was in some ways similar to what was televised on American television, on New Year's Eve. At that, Leonard thought about the ball drop in New York, and wondered if Penny was going to be there. He thought about that, the rest of the way to Geoff's.

Apt 314, NY, 5:30 PM Monday December 31th 2012.

Jeanie was trying to get Penny to go to Times Square for the evening, but Penny had refused to go, all day. Everything Jeanie had tried, Penny turned down. Jeanie wanted Penny to go, to get her mind off of everything. Penny didn't want to go, because she said she didn't want to go out into the cold, as it was just above freezing. What she didn't tell Jeanie, was she just didn't care about it, right now.

Finally, Jeanie gave up, and decided that they would just stay in and watch the ball drop, on television. Penny still looked and sounded really down, but Jeanie turned away and started making dinner. Maybe she'll have more of an expression watching television tonight.

Raj's Apt 8:00 PM Monday December 31th 2012.

Raj was getting ready to go out for the party. One of the married physics professors was having a party at his house. There would be quite a few people from the physics department, and, he was told, quite a few women, who worked with his wife. He was looking forward to it, as Howard and Bernadette, along with Sheldon and Amy, had been too busy to hang out with him or even get together to eat as a group anymore. As Raj thought about it, he realized how important Leonard and Penny had been, in keeping the group together.

Oh, well, he thought, I'll meet some new people tonight, and I may find some different people to hang out with. He checked his pants, and his sweater vest, and gave his hair a quick comb. He smiled at his reflection in the mirror, finished off his beer, so he'd be able to talk to the women at the party, and walked out his door.

Apt 314, NY, 8:30 AM Tuesday January 1st 2013.

Jeanie had just gotten up and turned the coffee on, when she was surprised to see Penny coming into the kitchen. Penny looked at the coffee, and when she saw it wasn't ready, she looked at Jeanie and said in a dead voice, "I'm getting a shower," then turned and went to the bathroom. Jeanie watched her go, and waited for the coffee to finish brewing. When the coffee was ready, Jeanie poured herself a cup and sat at the table, sipping it, wondering how Penny was going to do today.

They had gone to bed soon after midnight, drinking tea all night, except for one glass of wine, for a toast at midnight. Tomorrow, they would be getting their scripts and the table read would be on Thursday this week. It would be a short week, with blocking starting the afternoon, after the table read. Jeanie thought that Penny's emotional condition was going to be a problem, and felt she had to figure something out for Penny today.

After Penny had finished her shower, she came out to the kitchen, and after pouring herself a cup of coffee, started making some eggs for breakfast. She asked Jeanie if she would like some and Jeanie agreed. Penny made the eggs and toast, poured each of them some juice and they both sat down to eat. Afterward, they cleaned up and Jeanie said she was going to get a shower, while Penny poured another cup of coffee and took it to the couch to watch TV.

A/N Just a quick note here for my US readers. As my UK readers will know, Jools Holland has an annual television show, that features well-known people from show business and the music business. Unlike most American New Year's Eve shows, it's pre-recorded to accommodate the numerous people who will appear, but it's timed out so that the countdown to midnight occurs at the proper time.