A/N Well, here it is, the last full chapter. The epilogue (and a long author's note), will be out next Sunday. Next week's installment is about half the length of a regular chapter, and then the story (well, this part of the story) will be over. I want to warn everyone to take Penny and Jeanie's discussion of Penny's psychology appointment, in this chapter, with a grain of salt. An actual psychologist, who looked it over, pointed out some errors. I've made changes to try to remove most of them, but I know there are still a couple in there (basically they would not discuss some things this soon in therapy), because I left them in, for story purposes.

Chapter 85

Apt 601, 5:30 PM Wednesday January 9th 2013

Jeanie was going over her script, waiting for Penny to come back from her appointment with a psychologist from the office where Jeanie went. Jeanie had called her therapist at 8 AM, and arranged for the appointment to be for 90 minutes, starting at 3:30. She had found out her psychologist couldn't, ethically, take Penny as a patient, knowing she was a friend of Jeanie's. She expected Penny home any time now.

Two pages later, the door opened and Penny came in. Jeanie could see that her eyes were red, she must have been crying during the session. Jeanie didn't say anything, but Penny said, "Let me get my coat off, hit the bathroom and I'll be right out."

"How about I order some Indian for delivery tonight?" said Jeanie. "It'll take about a half hour." Penny nodded.

Jeanie called their order in, while Penny went to the bathroom. A few minutes later, Penny came out, got a glass of tea, and then sat down with Jeanie.

"So, who's your doctor," asked Jeanie, "and how did it go?"

"Dr Diane Werve and it was rough," admitted Penny. "I spent a lot of time crying, explaining what had happened over the last couple of months. She was very understanding, but she didn't say much. I was kinda embarrassed on how much I cried and how I couldn't finish a couple of sentences, because I was crying. One thing, she kept asking why I thought I was to blame for all of it. I mean it's obvious it's my fault, right? I guess the two biggest things would be dealing with the rape, and getting my drinking under control. They put me with her because she has experience with sexual victims and alcohol abuse issues."

"What," said Jeanie, "did you talk to her about your drinking?"

"Yes, I did," said Penny. "We talked about how much and when I drink, and also spoke about the times I don't drink. She was questioning me on the reasons I drank so much. She said we could work on cutting back on the drinking. I told her I think drinking is how I handle stress or get through my problems. See, if I'm not struggling with something, I don't drink all that much. For example, when I first went out with Leonard, I didn't drink a lot. After I broke up with him, and especially after he started dating the Indian woman, I would drink a lot, 'cause I didn't want to think about us not being together, and I didn't know how to handle it."

"Then," Penny continued, "after we got back together, my drinking went way down. Oh, there would be occasional nights when the girls and I might have one or two too many, but it wasn't all the time, like it had been. Diane thinks if she gives me some healthier coping mechanisms, it should help. Give me some tools to deal with the stresses in my life and the drinking should drop off. Like it did when I got back together with Leonard."

"What about the rape?" asked Jeanie.

Penny sounded choked up a bit, "That one could be a bit tricky and take a while." Penny paused and sighed, "She said knowing I was raped will keep coming back to me. But, because I can't remember the details, it could come back at odd times. Something might happen and my brain will make the connection, even if my conscious doesn't, and it might overwhelm me. She wants to get to it next week, because therapy could help me handle that. She warned me it could be difficult, and could go on for years, so I should be prepared."

"What else did you talk about?"

"We talked about my breaking up with Leonard," said Penny. "About why I broke up with him, and the way I did it. I don't know why she kept asking me why I felt I was a slut, bitch, or any of the other things I called myself. I mean, come on, it's obvious because that's what I am"

Jeanie didn't say anything, just stared at her.

Penny shrugged, "She asked me about how it all happened and I told her, and then she asked why I didn't talk to him and also about my fight with Amy and Bernadette. I couldn't give her an answer that made sense, she probably thinks I'm such a stupid bitch."

"Did she say that, or give you some kind of look that made you think that?"

"No, she didn't," said Penny, "but it's obvious, isn't it?"

Jeanie didn't say anything, and just looked away.

"Isn't it?"

Jeanie looked at Penny, and changed the subject, "Maybe you should try to talk to them again."

"No, I did call once, and left Bernadette a message," said Penny sadly. "But she didn't call back. It's probably just better for now to forget about it, until I get the help from Diane. Related to that, I told her about how lonely I was, and how difficult it was to find friends or even just people to go out with. She told me that could be something we could work on during regular therapy."

"Was there anything else?"

"Yeah, I told her I wanted…" The doorbell rang, cutting Penny off.

Jeanie got up to get her purse, and said, "Go ahead."

"I want to change the appointment to Wednesday's at 8:30," said Penny. "That's before we have to be in, and if I have to do something, with the show, on Wednesday afternoons, I won't have to cancel. She couldn't do that for next week, so next week it's at 1:30 PM."

"Makes sense," said Jeanie. She opened the door, and paid for the food. She tipped the boy, closed the door and walked toward the table. "You hungry?" asked Jeanie, putting the food on the table.

"Starved," admitted Penny.

"Well, let me get some plates and utensils and we can start eating. What do you want to do tonight?"

"Watch a few movies?"

"OK," said Jeanie, with a grin, "but I bought, so you do dishes before we watch."

Rm 308 Lindemann Building 5:30 PM Friday January 11th 2013

Leonard was running a bit late, he had walked through the laser lab, learning about the different equipment that would be his responsibility. He had made notes and was almost done writing his second week of lectures. He wanted to finish these, then go back to his rooms. He had a 7 PM dinner booked, and would have to make a slight change of clothing, as it was a formal hall tonight. Suddenly, his phone rang. Puzzled, he answered it with "Physics Department, Dr Hofstadter."

He heard a familiar voice, "Leonard, is that you?"

"Sheldon?" asked Leonard incredulously, "Why are you calling?"

He heard Sheldon sigh, "With those kind of manners, I'm surprised you haven't been banished from England before this."

Sheldon being Sheldon, thought Leonard, "I'm sorry, it is good to hear you, I was just surprised, that's all. So why are you calling?"

"I have some news for you," said Sheldon, "and I need some advice."

"Ok, so what's the news?" asked Leonard.

"Remember how I told you, I had thought of a way to use the reflections as answers to Quantum Gravity, then try to back engineer it?"

"Yes, what about it?"

"I just solved my first problem using quantum equations," said Sheldon, "and I thought I'd let you know. It was the precession of Mercury."

"So you have a viable theory?" asked Leonard excitedly.

"Not yet," said Sheldon, "I have solved a problem with equations I've found through trial and error. Basically, it's a modified De Witt-Wheeler equation. However, until I can derive the equations themselves, instead of making ad hoc corrections or changes, it's not really solved."

"It sounds as if you are on the right path, though, buddy."

"I may be, but there is still a lot of work left," said Sheldon.

"Well, I'm glad it's going well, and I hope you get it figured out" said Leonard. "I kinda miss you, Sheldon."

"Of course you do," said Sheldon.

Leonard sighed and chuckled, same old Sheldon, "So what kind of advice do you need?"

"Ummmmmmmmmmm," said Sheldon.

Studio 44, 3:30 PM Friday January 11th 2013

Penny was struggling, and had been struggling, every time she had to do a scene with the guest star, especially after they added the white board. The first time she had seen that, this morning, she burst into tears. When it came time to run the two scenes, she would start choking up. She was finally able to get through each scene, after a couple of tries, but hearing all the Physics terms, had brought back the memories of hearing Leonard, and it caused her problems, trying to get her lines out.

Jeanie knew what was going on, and she tried to talk Penny through it each day. It seemed to get better through the week, but, this afternoon, with the white board, Penny was flubbing her lines, again. Steve had called for a break, and afterward, Penny finally got through them. Penny was thinking of asking the psychologist, Diane, about it, so it wouldn't happen on taping day, but her appointment wasn't until next week. She would have to get through Monday, and the taping, on her own. She sighed, and started back to her dressing room, They were done for the week. Her and Jeanie were planning a quiet weekend watching TV and studying their scripts.

Raj's Apartment, 8:30 AM Sunday January 13th 2013

Raj was having his coffee, thinking about the weekend. He had tried to stop by both Sheldon's and Howard's again on Friday, and neither one was home. On Saturday, he called and while Bernadette was home, Howard wasn't and Sheldon, when he finally answered his cell, was in Anaheim, on the way back home, after checking out a new train store. He had tried going out to several places on Friday and Saturday night, with no luck with women, or finding some new friends.

He was tired of being alone. He had tried for the last several weeks to get involved with either of the couples, but they had been so busy. His attempts at striking out on his own, were not much better. He finally decided to call his parents. He dialed and waited, and the image of his mother and father came up on the screen. "Hello Mummy, hello Daddy."

"Rajesh, it's so good to hear from you," said his father.

"You haven't called us in weeks, has that little Jewish boy been keeping you busy?" asked his mother.

"No, no," said Raj, "he's been too busy for us to get together."

"What about your other friends?" asked his mother.

"Leonard and Penny are no longer here," said Raj. "The others are too busy also, so I've been very lonely."

"So, you called us so you can complain?" asked his father.

"Actually, I want to know if you can find someone, so I can do an arranged marriage?"

"What?" said both his parents together.

"I would like you to arrange a marriage for me."

"It may be difficult with you in California," said his father.

Raj knew that might be a problem, as previous attempts in California, had ended in failures. But, as much as he would miss California, he wouldn't miss it enough to stay there, and be lonely. "No, Daddy, if you can arrange a marriage, with someone from India, I would come home."

"You're sure about this?" asked his father. "You're not going to change your mind after we find someone?"

"No, Daddy," said Raj, "I'm making a commitment to come home and marry, when you find someone for me."

"Do you still have trouble talking to women?"

"Yes Daddy, I do."

"Well, I heard about a doctor here, who had cured several other people with the same affliction. When I arrange the marriage, do you want me to contact him also?"

Raj thought about it for a minute, "Yes Daddy, once I come home, I'll talk to him."

"Then I will start on that tomorrow," said his father. "Is there anything else you need?"

"Yes, an advance on my allowance," said Raj, "I over spent on me Peng… food again this week."

"I'll put money in the account," his father said, "but try to limit that. Goodbye."

"Goodbye Rajesh," said his mother.

"Goodbye, Mummy, goodbye Daddy," said Raj. He disconnected and looked around. He would miss this place, but he didn't know how long it would take for his parents to find someone. He could still be here for a couple of years.

Apartment 4A, 8:30 PM Sunday January 13th 2013

Sheldon had been nervous all day. He knew he was going to have to talk to Amy, but he'd didn't know quite how to start the conversation. Finally, he said, "Amy, may I ask you something?"

"What Sheldon?"

"As you know," he started, "you moved in when Leonard left, and we were supposed to have a five month experiment."

"What do you mean, supposed to have?" ask Amy, suspiciously.

"Well, that's what we agreed to," said Sheldon. "However, we've both been here for about a month and I think it's time we look at whether it needs to go the whole five months."

Amy had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, she thought she knew where this was going, "So you don't think it needs to go five months?"

"No, I don't," said Sheldon. "I would like to make the cohabitation part of the relationship agreement, permanent, with your permission."

Amy's mood swung 180 degrees and she yelled, "You shut your ass!"

Sheldon looked puzzled, "My ass is shut, Amy, I've already had my bowel movement today."

"I'm sorry, Sheldon," said Amy, "it's an expression, I was just surprised. Go ahead, continue."

"Well, I was surprised myself," said Sheldon. "I realized I was happy with it and you seemed to be happy with it. But, I wasn't sure, so I called Leonard and asked him."

"You called Leonard?" said Amy in amazement.

"Yes, I thought he might be able to help me," said Sheldon. "He may not be able to handle his own problems with women, but he does have experience I lack."

"Well, I'll say you have my permission," said Amy with an enormous grin.

"I want you to know," said Sheldon seriously, "that the new arrangement does not include coitus, nor is this an offer of engagement."

"I would not expect that," said Amy, thinking, the longer we are close, like this, the sooner coitus will happen. "You have my permission, when can you start on the new agreements?"

"I'll start the new roommate and relationship agreement, right away," said Sheldon excitedly.

Wolowitz Apt 10:30 PM Sunday January 13th 2013

"Howie, come to bed," said Bernadette, "you have a busy day tomorrow."

"I know," said Howard, sounding frustrated, and continuing to pace, "but having to make those changes to my PhD program, moving from Mechanical, to a Mechanical and Software engineering program is making me wonder if I can do it."

"Howie," said Bernadette patiently, "you built those things for the space station, and you programed them, so you've done all this before."

"I know, but what if I can't do this?" said Howard. "This is a whole new thing for me, this isn't astronautical engineering, I'll have to follow certain rules and…"

"Howie," said Bernadette, "is the change from mechanical to mechanical and software going to change anything you do, for this project?"

Howard stopped pacing, "Well, no, it will be the same, why?"

"Howie, if it's the same, and you could do it before, you won't have a problem, now."

"How do you know?" asked Howard.

"Well, you are no good with anything physical," started Bernadette, "and you made it through survival training at NASA."

Howard straightened up and nodded, "What else?"

"You were terrible with women, and I still married you."

Howard smiled, and climbed into bed, "Yes, yes you did."

"Putting those two together," said Bernadette with a sly smile, "you are no good with anything physical, and you were terrible with women." Her normally squeaky voice dropped lower as she said seductively, "But, you're one hell of a fuck."

Howard smirked, "How about I stop worrying about it, and take you to bed."

Bernadette got a huge grin, "I was hoping you'd say that," as she leaned over and kissed him.

Studio 44 2:30 PM Monday January 14th 2013

Penny had only gotten through the morning run-throughs, by burying her emotions today. She had realized, yesterday, that her audition for the show had been a year ago. All of the last few months were due to that, and it almost overwhelmed her. She had even maintained her composure when the actor asked her if she had a problem with him, because of her reactions around him, all week.

Penny assured him that while there was a problem, it had nothing to do with him. She explained his character reminded her of a bad time in her life, so he shouldn't worry about it. Penny and Jeanie were now waiting for him to finish his scene with Brent, before they would have their final pre-shot scene with him. Brent had spent most of the week avoiding the two of them, but he had no choice now, as he had to walk right by them. He had an angry look on his face as he passed by them, Jeanie just stared at him, angrily, but Penny's eye's started filling with tears. A few seconds later, the actor playing the physicist walked up.

Looking at them, he noticed their faces and said, "Was it something I did?"

They both shook their heads, before reassuring him, it had nothing to do with him.

Rm 308 Lindemann Building, 4:30 PM Tuesday January 15th 2013

Leonard had been trying to go over his first lecture for tomorrow, for two days, but he kept thinking about Penny. It had been a year before, on Sunday, that Penny had had her audition for her show, which had led to him being here. His mind kept drifting back to last year, when he heard a knock on the door, and when he looked up, he saw Dr Page. He stammered for a moment, before rising and saying, "Come in, Dr Page."

Dr Page closed the door, walked over to the chair Leonard indicated, and sat down. "How can I help you, Dr Page?"

"The door is closed, Leonard," said Alain, "please, call me Alain. I just wanted to stop by and see how you were adjusting to the UK, and to Oxford."

"Well, here at the university, I think I'm doing fine," said Leonard, "I've settled into my rooms, I've been working on the lectures, and I've got four weeks worth done. I've been meeting with the people at the lab, learning about the procedures and I think things are going well. Nobody's complained about me yet," he chuckled, "at least that I know of."

"Very good," said Alain. "That is something I wanted to talk to you about."

"Is there something wrong?" asked Leonard, concerned. "Someone complained to you, about me."

"No, no, no," said Alain, "nothing at all. The group at the lab are quite happy with you so far. I've looked over your syllabi, and I like the small changes you introduced. And I like your lectures, thanks for sending them over, as I asked. As someone new, I hope you understand why I wanted to look over everything, but please know, that we are very happy you decided to come to Oxford."

Leonard looked sheepish as he said, "I'm just trying to do the best I can."

"Well, keep it up," said Alain, as he rose. "I know you have your first lecture tomorrow, so good luck."

"Thank you, Alain," said Leonard.

Alain walked to the door and turned, "I like to keep abreast of how my professors are doing, so I like to talk to them each week, but you won't have to send your material over anymore." He smiled and shook Leonard's hand, "Have a good week."

"You too, Alain," said Leonard.

Alain nodded, walked to the door and left.

Leonard looked after him, and decided it was time for him to leave, also. He would try to finish looking over the lecture tonight, if he could keep his mind off of Penny.

Studio 44 Noon Tuesday January 15th 2013

Penny was in her dressing room, the morning run-through was finished. They would do another run-through around 2 PM, then they would have a break until it was time for hair and makeup. Penny had gotten through the morning scenes with the physicist, without breaking up, so she was hopeful she would be able to do the same this afternoon, and tonight's taping.

The actor had come to her and Jeanie after the morning run-through, he was still concerned that he was doing something wrong, because of their reactions to both assured him, it had nothing to do with him and that he was doing a fine job. The actor thanked them and went back to his dressing room.

There was a knock at Penny's door and on answering it, she found Jeanie.

Jeanie said, "We're going to Jake's tonight, and I'm not taking no for an answer. Just remember, though, no drinking for you, or me."

Penny smiled and nodded, and Jeanie left. I'll study the script for another hour, then go get lunch, thought Penny as she walked back to her couch, and her script.