A/C: Just to clear the air... Mai has depression :) As always, please review/follow and FAV! THANkS!

Chapter 2 - You Can't Choose What Stays

Lucien was already waiting in the parking lot when I was off at nine o'clock.

"I hope you're hungry," Lucien gave me one of his dazzling smiles once I climbed into the car.

I couldn't help but breath in the deep, delicious smell of food he had picked up. My stomach clenched, yet I couldn't even think about the satisfaction of food, let alone keeping it down. I felt hallow from the encounter with the Englishman. Even Lucien's warm smile couldn't shake these feelings of the deep-rooted anxiety from within me.

He was instantly aware of the shift in my demeanor. "Is everything okay?"

It was suddenly a blur of emotions. My throat tightened.

Lucien reached over the center console, placing his large, warm, hand on my knee and leaned towards me. His hazel eyes were shining, illuminated by the lights within the car as he spoke softly. "Mai, please tell me what's happening."

"Oliver Davis is here." I stared down at his hand on my lap. "He wants the original Tokyo SPR to work on a case with him."

For him, I wanted to say. But, I already knew Lucien's opinion on my former boss. In short: he wasn't a fan of Naru-the-Narcissist.

"Your old boss," Lucien's voice was clipped. "What did you say?"

"That I would make up my mind when he contacted the rest of the group." I said, but somehow it had felt like the wrong answer to Lucien. The wrong decision and he would have preferred if I had told Naru to fuck off.

Lucien felt withdrawn suddenly and he leaned back into his seat. The warmth left my skin, his hand now gripped the top of the steering wheel. He let out a long, deep sigh.

"Maybe I'm being a jealous boyfriend, but I get a bad feeling about this." He stared into the dark night. "What about your health? Or the progress you've made? I don't think it's a coincidence that you had a nightmare last night and now he's suddenly in town."

I know, I wanted to say but couldn't find my voice. I knew he was right because with Naru nothing was a coincidence.

"Is working with him again something that you even want?" Lucien asked and I bit my lip. "After everything that's happened?"

He was right; I didn't know if I could work with SPR again, given that I had no access to my abilities. That and it had been so long since we've seen one another, it would practically be like working with strangers.

"I don't want to sound like a prick," he clarified. "It's just… I want to make that sure you're okay. And this all sounds like a bad idea."

I had to remember that Lucien was there for me when I was fighting this darkness and knew how bad it could get. It was also in his nature to help people, to make sure they were taken care of.

When he realized I wasn't going to say anything, Lucien started the car.

The ride home was quiet and so was dinner. I hated how even the mention of Naru had put a wedge in my relationship, and I had only seen him for maybe five minutes. It wasn't just because he was 'sixteen-year-old' me's crush. No, it was the danger he posed… the unspoken past between us.

I tried not to think about that.

If we did do the case again, it would be strictly professional. That's to say if I still decided to go through with our deal. OIt was contingent on Naru being able to contact everyone and having them all agree. It would be a miracle, completely against the odds, that everyone's life just happen to come back to SPR the moment Naru came back.

Knowing Naru though, he would beat those odds.

^.^

The night had been quiet. Lucien and I barely talked at all.

In the morning, we ate breakfast quietly too.

I didn't what to say to him to make him feel better about this. Hadn't known what to do in this kind of situation - something that threatened my entire peaceful facade. I wanted, so badly, to reach across to him and say it would be alright, but he would see right through me because I didn't even believe that it was going to be alright.

Things were different.

Firm knocks on the door jolted us both from our thoughts. Lucien and I exchanged a look before he got up. "I'll see who it is."

Curiously, I padded into the small foyer to see this mystery visitor. With a cup of tea in my hand, I leaned against the wall.

On the other side of the door stood Naru.

I straightened instinctively, there was a glimmer of shock, or maybe confusion, in his eyes as he took in Lucien, then me. I suddenly felt like a deer who stepped out into an onslaught of traffic.

Caught in the headlights. Caught forever in his undertow.

Naru bowed his head politely, speaking fluently in Japanese, as he addressed Lucien. "Good morning, my name is Oliver Davis."

I could feel the thick tension from the two men. It didn't help that Naru had at least half-a-foot of extra height on Lucien. Lucien bowed his head, curtly. "It's good to meet you, Davis-san. I'm Lucien Sora."

"What do you need?" I said, flatly, from the hall.

Both men looked at me and I kept my gaze, firmly, on those indigo-blue eyes. Those would be the eyes that broke me.

"I just wanted to inform you that I've spoken to the SPR members. Everyone has contacted me and agreed to join the case."

I wasn't surprised. Naru loved challenges, just as much as he liked beating them.

"I see," I mused, not sure if I was disappointed or impressed.

Lucien's tension rolled off him in waves. That sensitive part of me, the one that could feel the other world, tingled as I felt it. There was a dull and numb ache from within me and I promptly ignored it.

"When would we start?"

Naru looked at Lucien. "Sora-san, would you mind if I spoke to Mai, privately, regarding the details of the case?"

My brown-haired companion only nodded, a flicker of frustration in his jaw. Maybe it from the lack of formalities. Or, it was just the fact that Naru was standing at my door, asking to speak to me in private.

Or is could have just been because it was Naru.

I didn't comment on the fact that Lucien wasn't my keeper. Not Naru, not anyone, would need to ask for permission to speak to me. I swallowed my frustrations.

"I'll just finish up in the kitchen, Mai." Lucien said as he padded over to me, bracing my waist with a strong hand and dipping low to kiss my cheek. He grabbed the cup from my hand, politely.

Though, nothing about the gesture felt polite. It had felt like I was suddenly an object of their attention.

I felt Naru's gaze on us the entire time until Lucien walked back around the corner. I stepped forward, unsure of what to say or do with my limbs. I folded my arms behind my back. "There's a garden we can talk in, if you want."

"Sure."

I lead the way through the condo corridors. The garden was simple, yet elegant. It wasn't large, but it was elaborate and had many tall, beautiful plants - it was enough to make you think you had stepped into a different world. There was a small fountain, a gazebo and a quiet pond stocked with koi fish deep in the center of the lush space. Often, Lucien and I would come down here and just watch the night sky together, since it was conveniently located in the atrium of the condos, outside.

Naru was hot on my heels and I stopped abruptly in front of the gazebo, turning to face him.

I squared my shoulders, "Is this private enough?"

There was a ghost of a smirk on his lips. "Not exactly private in the middle of a condo where people can over-hear us."

"You're so…" I held my tongue, huffing out a breath. No, I couldn't let him have that affect on me. Crossing my arms, I asked again. "What do you need, Naru?"

The old nickname just slipped off my tongue so easily. So fluently. As if he hadn't been gone for four years.

Naru noticed it too. That condescending smirk was gone and replaced with...content?

"I realize much has changed. This case is going to be quite advanced and I wanted to know where you were with your E.S.P. Can you still conduct astral projection?" He didn't mention the slip of his old nickname. Instead, he went straight to business. Same old, Naru.

But this question…

I averted my eyes, looking down. "Well...no."

"Is that a question, or a statement."

"No, I can't." I snapped, looking back up at him. "I can't do that anymore."

Naru was quiet. Contemplating. I dropped my arms, "so does that mean I can't join anymore, since I'll just be useless?"

Bitter. Resent and laced with venom. That statement was all of those things and I couldn't deny the fact that I was turning into a different person in just a matter of days. It was my coping mechanism, to lash out with my claws and teeth bared because that was better than the utter darkness and despair I often felt like falling into. I don't regret losing my powers. I only regret that it happened the way it did.

"You're still useful with or without those abilities," Naru said. He knew how important they were to me. Back then, it wasn't only about using them to solve the case but helping those who needed it. In fact, he was the one who introduced me to them.

"Is that all you needed?" I squirmed under his penetrating gaze, as if he were remembering the same thing I was.

"I secured a lease at the old office for the time being. We'll be meeting there Friday to go over the case. I'm hoping we can start it by next Friday. Will that be adequate time to give your employer for time off?"

"It'll be fine."

Naru nodded, and pulled on the flap of his dark suit jacket. He handed me a business card. "This is my number. If anything changes, feel free to contact me."

I took the card. It was just like Naru: sophisticated and elegant. Nothing too fancy, though, of course the card was all black. His English name was in solid white, block letters.

"Thank you, Davis-san." I said, and Naru sighed outwardly.

"I would prefer you not to use that name."

"Shibuya-san."

Those blue eyes hardened. I could tell there was a rebuttal at his lips, but he soon pressed them into a firm line.

"I better go." I said, moving around to pass him.

Naru stepped to the side and as I passed him his hand rested on my elbow. I inhaled sharply, eyes snapping to his as I froze in my spot.

"Mai," he started then closed his mouth. The words on his lips were gone, all that was left was my name - just like the old days. I gulped down a breath and licked my suddenly dry lips.

"Yes?"

"It's good to see you are well." He let go of my arm, and I swore he could feel my pulse pounding through my flesh. I nodded in agreement.

"You can see yourself out."

I refused to look into those eyes again as I turned on my heels and walked away as fast as I could. I didn't care that he probably didn't know how to get out. He was smart, he would find a way. Besides, heat stained my cheeks, my arm where he touched. In all my time with him, Naru had never touched me before. Maybe when he was frustrated with me, to pull me out of the room.

But never just for the sake of touching me.

As I retreated, I felt those eyes on me the entire time.

^.^

Father Toujo was okay with me being away. Even though, a small part of me wished he wasn't. He understood how much this would mean to John and I - reconnecting with our old colleagues.

On Friday morning, Lucien asked me twice if I wanted a ride to the Shibuya district. I declined both times but assured him everything would be okay. I understood he was worried, though.

Besides as I walked, I was actually thinking about the happy memories from back when I made my way to Shibuya four years ago. It reminded me of the times I looked forward to going to the office. Mostly in hopes to see Naru, who would mostly stay in his office the whole time, ask for tea and be extremely moody.

I smiled at the memory, before I felt my body freeze at the door to the office.

Frowning, I suddenly didn't know who was going to be on the other side. Maybe Naru had lied to me about everyone being on board with this. Somehow, I doubted that.

I took a deep breath and entered the old office.

Ayako, Bou-san and Masako were sitting on the couches. It was so quiet when I entered, not sure what to say or expect.

I smiled kindly, "hello everyone. It's been a long time."

"You look so different," Ayako commented. "Your hair is long now!"

It went to the length of my shoulders now. I didn't feel like it was that long, but it certainly was longer than the short bob I was sporting in high school.

Ayako seemed older now, her face was still youthful but her eyes seemed wiser. She was in her usual attire: some kind of high-end jacket over a pair of equally expensive looking silk black pants. Her long, red-brown hair was left untied and settled down the column of her back.

I noticed Masako next, who didn't seem to change all that much. Her black shiny hair was still perfectly sleek. Her clothes were different, somehow more modern than the usual Japanese style kimonos she loved in high school. Masako was wearing a pair of white jeans that clung to her petite thighs and a black tank-top under a baby blue floral kimono-like cardigan. The material was flowy and feminine.

She was still just as breathtaking.

"Mai, I'm loving the new look," Bou-san chirped in. He was practically still the same. Bou-san had his usual blonde-hair tied back. His outfit was simple: a T-shirt and jeans. It was kind of a relief to see he hadn't changed with all this time.

"It's not really new."

I had felt that my taste in clothes remained relatively the same. I had to give up wearing my skirts since they often showed the deep cuts on my thighs, so I traded them for leggings and jeans.

That was exactly what I wore today, one of my best black-jeans and a simple white T-shirt that I paired with a dark jacket.

"You're right, I kind of miss the short skirts and the cute high school uniform."

Ayako snapped her head towards him, eyes focused.

"I see you're still going after the young ones, you shameless cradle-robbing pervert," she interjected.

Bou-san looked offended. "Mai is all grown up and an adult now. What are you, like, twenty?" he looked at me for confirmation.

"Yeah, twenty on the nose. I guess I am all grown up." I said, feeling a slight flush.

Ayako sighed, "You're still a pervert. If it's been four years that means you're four years older too, you creep."

"Shut up, Ayako!"

She scoffed, "What are you going to do about it, old man?"

The feeling of dread that had been rolling in my gut the past few days started to lessen. I laughed as the two older adults bantered, just like the old days. It felt good to laugh, to see that even though we were so different, some things never changed. It was almost a relief and I was instantly in higher spirits.

That good feeling plummeted when Lin and Naru came out one of the offices. Somehow, both of them looked as if they hadn't aged a day.

Lin was still meticulously dressed in a fine dress shirt and a black tie. His hair still covered most of his devastatingly handsome face. But those eyes remained sharp and I bet he, likely, still had his sharp tongue to go with it.

"Since we're all here, I'd like to start." Naru walked past me and took a seat at the head of the table, Lin stood at his side. He sounded like he was in some kind of mood and Bou-san raised his eyebrows at me, grinning - likely thinking the same thing.

For the first time since I saw her, Masako spoke. "What about John-san?"

"He'll be joining us later, in addition to Yasuhara."

"So what's this big-shot case you're working on?" Ayako leaned back into the couch, crossing her arms.

I took a seat on the farthest couch away from Naru.

"Three months ago, an episode of a popular ghost adventures team investigated an abandoned prison in the area. They caught what was believed to be phenomenal poltergeist activity, and the episode has since then aired multiple times throughout many regions." Naru said.

"Isn't that a good thing then?" Bou-san pointed out. "Let someone else deal with it."

Naru disagreed. "We aren't there for a typical ghost hunt. The SPR in London wants to replicate the evidence. Poltergeist activity of this magnitude has never been captured before from a credible source."

"So we won't be doing any kind of spiritual cleansing?" I asked, a little taken aback.

"No," Naru reached up, gesturing for Lin to hand him his notebook. "This is strictly for research. Though, if anything were to go south, we should have all of our bases covered in terms of protection." He opened his notebook, pulling out a pen. "Each of you had said that you still practiced your spiritual art form, in one way or another. This will be an important component while on the case, so even if we aren't cleaning ghosts we can still protect ourselves."

He made no mention to what I confided in him the other day. Which is likely why he had said I wouldn't be useless on this case because we weren't going in there to find any ghosts or cleanse them.

Masako asked, "Is this prison in the city?"

Lin said, "It's approximately eleven hours by train, in the Kamikawa district."

"Kamikawa," Ayako leaned forward, surprised. "Where on earth are we going to stay?"

"There's a small town an hour away from the location, in Biei. They have accommodations that we'll be staying in." Naru answered. At least it was better than camping.

Ayako scowled, "I suppose we're taking this eleven hour train?"

Naru said, "No, I've arranged a private chartered flight. It should take a little more than an hour to get to the airport in Asahikawa. From there, it's an hour drive to Biei."

Ayako seemed pleased with the answer and leaned back in her seat, "Now that's how I like to travel."

"How long will this whole investigation take, Naru?" Bou-san let out a breath. "No offence, but we all have our own lives now. We can't just up and leave for extended periods of time."

"I'm aware of that. Initially when I had contacted each of you, almost everyone had said a week would be the longest you'll consider, correct?" He asked the group. Everyone nodded, except me. I didn't recall him asking me such a thing. Maybe he just didn't care. "I wouldn't take you away for any longer than that duration."

Now, Naru looked up at me. "How about you, Taniyama-san?"

I could almost feel the questioning looks on everyone's faces at the formalities Naru threw my way.

Heat stained my cheeks and I blocked out everything else. I only concentrated on only those blue eyes - focused on not squirming from under them. "A week should be okay."

It was summer after all and if it were like the other cases then Naru would make sure we were all compensated for. He promptly wrote down my answer, and then continued on to tell us the full extent of the case.

This prison was docile. It has since been closed for almost thirty years, and remains part of the historical site of Biei.

However, there have been reports of groups doing satanic rituals on the location, claiming that it is a natural gateway to the spirit realm because of the types of the dark history in the area. Suicide, murder...anything that could happen, has happened within the past several years. Then, ever since this team of investigators came to the location and caught the poltergeist activity, it has been a major attraction. Hence, why the SPR got involved, since it could move along some of their research of poltergeist and the mechanics. Though, I couldn't understand how they did that exactly - collected the evidence and find something scientific out of it. But Naru was a scientist, he probably had a method.

Something bothered me. This was such a high profile case and was rare for him to take. It didn't quite make sense but I didn't feel confident enough to question it.

"This place is probably crawling with demons," Bou-san had said at one point.

Masako agreed, "yes, it seems irresponsible to send a team of spiritualists to such a dangerous location."

"Jeez, Naru, what games are you trying to play? Most of us have been out of formal practice for at least four years." Ayako said.

He closed his notebook, placing it on his lap. I had a feeling this might have been why Naru was moody when he and Lin walked out of the office. Keeping such a large case from our knowledge before asking for our help was a gamble. No doubt, Lin lectured him about it and the repercussions.

It was exactly like Naru to do that, though.

"I understand you might be concerned about the dynamics of this case. Lin and I have made special preparations for the extreme case of demonic possession," Naru said.

"What kind of preparations?" I asked, looking at Lin specifically.

Lin lifted his hand, pulling out a chain from under his shirt. At the end of the chain was a clear, glass crystal with a gold plate encrusted in the middle. Scattered across the plate was a series of Chinese symbols. "This is a Chinese talisman that can be used to physically and spiritually protect the wearer. When we get to the location, each of you will be given one."

Bou-san leaned in closer, "that's pretty impressive Lin. I didn't know you could make a talisman to do that."

"It doesn't work solely on it's own," Lin said and we all looked at him, confused. "It will only serve to protect you when combined with a small smudging session to prepare using the talisman services."

"So, like voodoo?" I stared at him.

"No," Naru answered. He crossed his arms and his eyes were closed - a common Naru sign that meant he was agitated at my lack of knowledge. "The smudging is a cleansing for our body, mind and soul. Voodoo is the exact opposite."

I mentally stuck my tongue out at him, crossing my arms and pressing back into my seat. It was just like Naru to correct me in a condescending way.

"What is this ritual, uh...I mean, smudging we have to do?" I asked, warily.

"I'll explain more when we are at the location but before we leave for the hotel, each time, you must cleanse yourself with the smudging process." Lin said. At least it wasn't some kind of weird song-and-dance ritual. Though, it would be entertaining if Naru had to preform it.

In spite of myself, I smiled from the thought of that.

"If there are no more questions," Naru said in a hard tone, "I'll make the necessary arrangements for our flight this coming Friday at six in the morning."

In unison, we all dropped our mouths open. "Six in the morning!"

Naru stood up in a fluid motion, obviously annoyed by his entire teams lack of morning-travel enthusiasm "I want to thank you for all of your support during this investigation. I know it was very sudden."

In other words, 'thank you for coming to my beck and call, just like I knew you all would.'

That was Naru's way of thanking us, at least he said the actual words this time. We watched as he and Lin trailed into the office again, closing the door.

Now, there was only silence.

"He sure is the same," Bou-san said, leaning back. "I'd say I'm kind of relieved. But it's a little unnerving."

"He does have that effect on people," Ayako pitched in. She then glanced at me. "Speaking of, are you two fighting? I don't think I've ever heard him call you by your maiden name."

I shrugged. "With him, who knows. Who cares?"

Ayako and Bou-san shared a look and I got out of my chair, stretching my arms over my head. The meeting only took about an hour but I felt like I had been sitting straight-backed for much longer. From the corner of my eye I watched as Masako neared me.

"Mai, are you still practicing?" Her voice was low enough that Bou-san and Ayako hadn't heard, they were deep in a new conversation.

I knew what she was asking.

I shook my head and meet her steely gaze. "No, I can't do that anymore."

Masako only stared at me with a sad expression on her face. "I see. Well, it is good to see you once again." A rare smile graced her lovely features. Masako and I had since settled our differences a long time ago. Maybe this could be the new beginning of our friendship.

I felt my face settle into a smile. "It's good to see you too, Masako."

^.^