October 3rd, Year 202

Sarada has this bad habit of trotting off whenever Sakura or I am not looking. Thankfully it's not as good as her crawling. Back then she made little to no sounds, but this time around whenever she would attempt to run away her feet would patter loudly across the wooden floorboard.

She always has this… gurgle of glee whenever she was caught. By now I figured that she was much smarter than I gave her credit for, even Sakura said that babies while not exactly 'aware' of what may transpire around them, are very good at picking up feeling and connections between people.

Which is why I swear Sarada does this on purpose as it's the only time I ever have to carry her.

December 13th, Year 202

I find myself coming home from another mission, another zetsu killed by my hands. The bastard even had the nerve to take on Itachi's face.

I arrive late, and I'm way too tired to really greet everyone, though I make sure to put in the time to be with Sakura. She asks me to put Sarada to bed.

I carry our daughter to her crib, making sure not to wake her up. Her arms greedily wraps the green dinosaur plushie into her grasp and she falls asleep within seconds. I put her to bed, and she sleeps peacefully. She has this… innocent smile, like she's pleasantly enjoying her dreams. I want to reach out, lay a comforting hand to wish a good night, but I stop myself.

But how much blood have I stained my hand with? How many lives have I taken?

Do I truly deserve this feeling of happiness?

January 21st, Year 203

My eyes are cold when I look into the mirror. They're tired and lifeless, the kind that guilty men have. The eyes of a killer. I wash my face, but it doesn't go away.

March 28th, Year 203

Lately, I've been struggling to get a good night's sleep, both due to an increase in missions and nightmares from my past. Due to my waking up randomly in the middle of the night, I've opted to sleep on the couch so I don't disrupt Sakura's sleep. She needs it for her work after all.

Sakura gives me this strange look now and then. I can see it in her eyes that she knows something is up, but due to my recent missions stacking up over the past couple of months, she doesn't ask any questions to add any unnecessary stress.

It wasn't until the night before the next mission that she asks me what was wrong. I chose not to respond to her, but she promises to give me all the time I need to think about my answer. She convinces me to come to bed with her.

That night I managed to sleep soundly.

April 5th, Year 203

For a while, everything was going fine. Every day was the same. I wake before Sakura, I make breakfast, nothing amazing just eggs and toast most of the time (the limitations of having one hand).

Sakura goes to work, not before preparing lunch for Sarada and a goodbye kiss. I look after Sarada. I watch her with a keen eye, making sure to stay up to date with the Daily Konoha newspaper. She tries to crawl away, I stop and bring her back to the room.

Lunch, then back to watching Sarada. Sakura comes home stressed, we each dinner as a family. Sleep.

Rinse and repeat. Rinse. And. Repeat.

May 12th, Year 203

I need to leave. My nightmares return, mocking me for enjoying a peaceful life after what I have done. And also it might be the fact that I had a falling out of sorts with Sakura.

The nightmares have been getting worse. A couple of nights ago it reached the breaking point. When I awoke, I found my hand around my wife's neck. I was shocked. And this is the first time we truly had a disagreement ever since becoming husband and wife.

Strangely, it was not being of the… choking incident, Sakura had been very forgiving. She urged me to tell her what is wrong, saying she'll always be my side. But I… I can't burden her conscience with my own sins. She… Sakura is someone I cannot bring myself to tell.

I look at Sakura, and I look at our daughter, and each time I do I feel even further apart from them.

May 13th, Year 203

Sakura and I haven't spoken this morning apart from the casual 'have a good day' and 'make sure Sarada finishes her meal'. And that's when the idiot decides to summon me to his office. Sakura's parents were more than happy to accept Sarada for the day.

Naruto had a mission that only I could do. Find Kaguya's foretold enemies, exploring her dimension… I have been putting off for some time now with Sarada's upbringing but…

Maybe it was time to leave? I don't know when I'll be back but… this peaceful lifestyle of mine, having a loving wife and a beautiful daughter. It's more than I deserve.

I ask Naruto to give me three days to think about it.

May 20th, Year 203

Word must have gotten around my friends because Sakura came home early. She had looked worried like I was disappearing on her again. I thought she would scream at me again, yell at me not to go. But she did none of that.

My powerful, strong-headed knucklehead of a wife, cried. She broke down and cried, and I felt guilty. I felt selfish. I felt hatred, for myself.

Sakura didn't try to stop me though, as if knowing what I was going through. That night I embraced Sakura for what could potentially be for the last time.

May 21st, Year 203

I made sure not to awaken you Sakura, I don't think I could watch you break again.

I made sure to visit Sarada one more time before I leave. The little tyke was awake as if expecting me. Of course, she was. Her small arms reached out towards me, and I did the sensible thing and granted her request. This could potentially be the last time I do so after all.

She gurgled cutely, playfully grabbing at my hair as she always does. Her innocent gaze looked into me as if peering into my soul. And she decides now or all times to say her first words. Sorry to say it wasn't 'mama', didn't mean to take that from you.

It's time for me to take my leave. I thank you both for these past few years. I'm leaving behind this diary as where I'm going, I won't have a need for it.

Sakura and Sarada.

Sayonara.

I love you both. I'll miss you both.

A/N: Hey it's been a while. Been busy with life stuff and starting to get back into the idea of writing stories again. I also picked up screenwriting as it seemed pretty interesting. So far I've been having lots of fun with it.

I didn't know where to go with this fic, to be honest. I kinda just saw it as a prelude into Sasuke leaving, and the entries just naturally went in that direction. I haven't actually finished a story in a very long time, so even though this is short, I feel satisfaction in this small little story. XD

Anyway, I hope you all have a good day! Look forward to hopefully more stories. I plan to eventually finish An Angel to Guide me and Mother for a Year. And I'm planning another League of Legends fic as well as a Naruto one.