Title: Closure
author: Cindy Ryan
Tim was just leaving the locker room after shift. He could admit to himself that he was worn out. Tim was starting to feel the stress and lack of sleep from the past few days. He had the next forty-eight hours off and he was going to enjoy every second of it even if he didn't leave the sofa for most of it.
"Tim."Grey called from Tim's left.
Tim stifled a sigh as he turned to face his C.O. He was really hoping Grey wasn't going to ask him to stay.
"Yes,Sir?"Tim asked.
"Walk with me."Grey replied as he turned and began to walk.
Tim shifted the strap of his bag to his other shoulder and fell into step with Grey. He saw Grey glance behind them as they began to climb the stairs. About halfway up he stopped.
"Did you know Chen was here?"Grey asked quietly.
Tim did a double take.
"No."Tim answered. "She alright?"
"She asked to see video of her rescue; said she needed closure."Grey explained. "I thought it wasn't a good idea but she insisted."
"Damn."Tim swore as he scrubbed a hand over his face. "Where is she?"
"I'll show you."Grey responded as he started up the stairs.
Tim followed a knot of dread and worry forming in his stomach. He knew from experience that closure wasn't all that it was cracked up to be. Sometimes it brought more pain. More pain was the last thing Lucy needed. If she'd let Tim help her through this it'd be a start for him to put things right.
Lucy knew she was crying and didn't bother to wipe the tears away. She'd watched the videos Grey had cued up once all the way through. Now she'd just finished watching Tim's bodycam a second time. Her right hand hovered over the mouse. Jackson had told her how much this had affected Tim. How much it'd torn him up. How much Tim had blamed himself.
'I'm responsible for a life being in jeopardy. '
Tim had told the man who had run contraband to the prison. His voice had been deadly calm but so much emotion had been clipped in each word.
Lucy's vision blurred and she pushed the laptop away.
'I've got her! I've got her!'
She'd been told Tim had found where she'd been buried. Now she knew he'd seen her breadcrumb; her ring. Lucy had been so afraid no one would find her even though she knew no one would give up on her. That they'd search through every square inch of the state if they had too. With a shaking hand Lucy reached forward and hit play of the next video she wanted and turned the screen to her. The video bounced as Tim moved.
They pulled her free of her prison. It was so strange to watch that. Watching as they laid her on the ground away from the barrel. Armstrong's voice came off camera.
'She breathing?'
'No.'
Death had nearly claimed her in that small dark place. She'd been so close that Tim had to force air into her lungs; force her heart to beat again. Lucy shivered and drew her knees to her chest shrinking into the leather chair. That was how Tim found her. Shaking and sobbing and curled into a chair like a child. She barely noticed when her partner closed the door behind him. Lucy didn't know how he was here, but she was beyond grateful that he was.
"Easy, boot."Tim soothed as he reached her. "Sssh, it's okay. You're safe. I've got you; you're safe.'
Tim's arms enveloped Lucy and she collapsed into his embrace. He sat in the chair and pulled her onto his lap. Try as she might Lucy couldn't stop the tears.
"I've got you."Tim said softly.
Silently Tim raged against Rosalyn and Caleb as he held a sobbing Lucy. He raged against himself for not protecting her. She was his rookie; his partner. He'd failed her in the worst way. Now her tears wet his shirt and her small frame shook.
"You're safe, boot."Tim whispered. "He can't hurt you."
Every tear; every sob was like a knife in Tim's heart. He couldn't imagine what she'd been through trying to stay alive in that small confined space. Tim didn't think he'd have been strong enough if their spots had been reversed. Over the time she'd been his rookie Lucy had proven that she'd make a hell of a cop. At the same time she'd become his partner, his friend.
"I'm sorry, Lucy."Tim apologized in a hitched voice. "I let you down."
Lucy's right hand curled against Tim's shirt as she pulled back. Tim forced himself to meet her tearful gaze.
"You didn't."Lucy replied in a hoarse voice.
"Boot."Tim protested with a shake of his head.
Lucy shifted and gestured to the screen where an image had been paused. Tim saw his own hands preforming CPR. He swallowed hard as he stared at Lucy's still form. He'd been so afraid they'd been too late.
"You saved me."Lucy insisted as tears started again.
"You saved yourself, boot."Tim said his voice rough.
After a moment Tim reached into the side pocket of his bag which had dropped to the side of the chair. He took out a small object and pressed it into Lucy's right hand.
Lucy knew what it was even before she opened her hand. The ring she'd dropped as a breadcrumb. The ring that might have been her gravemarker. She shivered and closed her hand back around the ring. Tim's words echoed through her troubled thoughts.
'You saved yourself.'
Maybe, but her partner had been there when she'd needed him. They'd come a long way since that first day of training. A true bond had formed between them that Lucy knew was never going to fade. She curled back in his arms and rested against Tim's chest.
"You're going to be alright, Lucy."Tim promised in a quiet gentle tone.
Lucy knew he was right. Today hadn't completely brought the closure she'd hoped for. It'd been another step forward and right now moving forward was all she could do.
end
