Karen felt warm and cozy. She was in a bed. A warm comfortable bed with wonderfully soft and fluffy blankets.
Rolling to her right side, she pulled the blankets up closer around her neck. She opened her eyes and saw Heath sitting there next to her. 'He sat with me? I thought he was angry with me. He didn't say anything until he went to help me into the carriage.'
"Hello, Karen." His voice was the most welcome sound she'd heard in a long time. "I wasn't about to leave you alone when we got the note this morning that said we needed to come and collect you because of some reason that Mother wouldn't share with me. But to see how you looked sitting on the porch at the school, I couldn't just put you in bed and walk away." He watched as she sat up on the bed. "Would you tell me what happened? I want to understand."
She looked down at her hands folded demurely in her lap. "One of the girls at school was teasing me in the last class of the day. She doesn't like being away from her family and at school. She doesn't believe that a woman needs education. But she plays otherwise quite well. She was implying that you – you." She bowed her head and her shoulders started shaking. Heath moved to sit on the edge of the bed and took her gently in his arms.
"Ssshhhh. It's okay. Whatever she said, it wasn't the truth. We know the truth and that's what matters. Was she trying to say that I had been less than a gentleman with you?"
Karen nodded. She still hated the fact that anyone thought that Heath could be less than a gentleman with a lady. He'd never been anything else with her. Always helping her and protecting her. Look at how he'd been when they had found Annabelle's body in the bushes. He'd kept her close until they got home. And when he'd found her out by her parents' graves with her Pa's gun? He stayed beside her until she woke up and was able to do for herself.
"Did something else happen? I don't think that would be enough to upset you to the point of needing to be away from school for a few days."
Karen sat up and dried her eyes. "After class, the teacher kept her after and I decided I needed to go for a ride around the property. Mrs. Anderton had approved it as long as I took care of the horse I took out and didn't leave it for anyone else to do. I had no problem with that. I went riding. I was out by a cliff that overlooked a valley at the southern end of the property. I stood there for a bit just looking out over the valley and thinking about lots of different things. Suddenly, I heard a snake. Apparently, I had disturbed it and it was getting ready to strike. I backed away from it, watching it the whole time. Once I got back to my horse, I mounted quickly and rode away. As I rode back to the school, it struck me that if that snake had bit me while I was that far out, I would most likely never make it back to the school. Even if I could keep myself calm on the ride back. I would never see you or your wonderful family again. I felt as lost at that moment as I had the night I left Pa's house with his gun in my bag." She looked away from Heath for a moment. "I felt dirty and tainted all over again."
"Karen. Karen, look at me. Please." When she brought her eyes back to him, he touched her cheek. "You are not dirty. You are not tainted. I don't care what anyone says. You are pure and innocent. You are the epitome of everything that any decent man would want in a woman."
He pulled out another kerchief and used it to wipe the tears from her cheeks. "I don't want any woman but you for my own, Karen. Just you."
"Thank you, Heath. Thank you so much." She leaned into his embrace once more. She hugged him just as tight as he hugged her. "That puts my mind at ease. Thank you."
"I'm here to help, Karen. I just want you to be happy. Happy in whatever you choose to do."
"I'm happy just being here with you and your family. It makes me feel that I have more than one place that I belong."
"You do belong here. Just as much as you do at the Ponderosa. My mother would be happy to tell you the same thing. As would my brothers and sister, I'm sure."
"Was Ms. Victoria upset to receive the note?"
"I think Mother was more concerned that upset. She was worried about you. She told me to hitch up the carriage right away. She said that I was taking both her and Audra to the school to collect you. We were told that you needed some time and that she would let you explain when we got you back here. You wouldn't be returning to school until Monday."
"I'm glad you all understand that sometimes I just need some time. I can't always get that at school."
"Mother told you already that anytime you need the extra time all you have to do is say so and we'll make the arrangements. She wasn't joking about that, Karen. She probably understands better than almost anyone gives her credit for."
"I don't like that you all had to come pick me up like that. And I would have understood had your mother simply sent you to get me. Although, it probably made more of an impression on Lydia that all of you came to get me."
"Lydia? Is that the girl that was saying that you were ever less than ladylike with me?"
Karen nodded. "I would hope that seeing how careful all of you were would send her a message to stop being so ugly." Karen looked up at Heath. "I think she wants you to court her. She thinks she is a prize to catch. So far, she's been just flirting with the hands at the school. But I just know that she wants you. She's talked about it before. Some of the other girls have heard her and just last week I heard her say that one day she'd be part of your family."
"She'll never take me from you, Karen. I don't want someone like that. I want you. You are the only one I need."
"Are you sure, Heath? I mean, are you really sure that I'm what you want?"
"Karen, I don't know how to make you see it. But somehow, I will show you that you are all I want." Heath pulled her back into his embrace and just held her close and quiet for a few moments.
A knock on the door pulled the two apart. "Yes?" called Karen.
Audra opened the door. "Is everything okay in here?"
Karen nodded. "I think so."
Audra walked in a little further. "Are you feeling okay, Karen? Is there anything I can get you?"
"Would you make sure that everyone is together? I only want to explain this one time. Then, I can start to put this whole awful thing behind me."
"I'll take care of that. Mother sent me to tell you that lunch will be ready in just a few minutes and she hoped that you would be up to sitting down with us for it."
"I'll be there, Audra. Thank you." Audra smiled and left the room without another word.
"Let's put your shoes on and get you ready to go down for lunch." Heath helped her to sit up and uncover her legs. Then, he bent over and slipped her shoes back on to her feet and put his own boots back on. He held out a hand and allowed her to stand up. She picked up the shawl on the dresser by the door on the way out and draped it around her shoulders as they headed down to the dining room.**
Once lunch was finished, Victoria turned to Karen. "Would you like to explain to everyone what caused you to need the extra time away from school?"
Karen nodded, looking almost ashamed. "I'm afraid it was primarily because I allowed someone to get to me. She was saying that I had most likely been less than ladylike with Heath. The girl that said it doesn't like being at school but she makes believe that she does for the sake of the staff. Not that I think any of them buy into it. She torments anyone that she sees as beneath her. She wants Heath to court her and is trying to use one of the hands at the school to make him jealous. When she started tormenting me yesterday, I asked her if she had any experience with rape. If she'd ever been through what I had. Being kidnapped twice in six months and tied to a bed while two men that you couldn't see felt your legs under your skirt and talked as if they would actually rape you. Being afraid for days that you would never see your family again. Finding yourself praying that you would die before they could destroy you like that." Karen stopped and took a deep breath, trying to keep the tears at bay. She wasn't sure that she would be able to for long and so was trying hard to keep it going in order to hurry through some of this without completely breaking down.
"Karen, you don't have to be so strong in front of us," Victoria said gently, putting one hand over the younger woman's. "We know your story. We understand you. If you start to cry, there is no shame in that."
"I just feel like I have to be strong. It's nothing anyone has said or done. It's just a feeling I have. I feel that to let this get to me allows them to win and I can't let that happen." She took another deep breath. "Besides, if I start crying now, I'll never get this out and then I can never start putting it behind me. Although I'm afraid that that particular effort is going to take a lot longer than I might like."
Victoria nodded. "It will. And there will be times when it feels like you'll never get there. That's when you need to lean on those of us who will be there for you during those times that you feel lost, lonely, confused. And it will happen, dear. There is no doubt about that. But we will be there for you. As will your father and brothers. Don't ever forget that. You have lots of people to help you through everything. And we don't mind if you lean on us."
"Of course not, Karen," Audra rushed in. She felt for the young woman who had so recently become such a large part of their lives. She understood feeling vulnerable. Even knowing that her family had her back no matter what, Audra still had her moments when she felt extremely vulnerable and she knew that Karen had even more reasons to feel that way. She couldn't even imagine being in Karen's position and having been through what she had. She didn't know if she would handle it half as well as Karen had.
Victoria had the same basic thoughts as her daughter did. She wasn't exactly sure that she could be as strong as Karen if she had had as much thrown at her in such a short amount of time. But she knew that, because Karen had been raised as a strong young woman, she would not allow this to remain a weakness but turn it into a strength that would give her enough strength to make it through anything that life could dish out. She was certain beyond any shade of doubt that once Karen got past this she would be a force to be reckoned with.
"Suffice to say, this girl decided she had to torment me yesterday and, while I did shed some tears in the classroom, my other classmates decided they weren't going to let her get away with it and went to get Mrs. Anderton. She took Lydia to task and, when Mrs. Carlisle came in, she made the decision to keep Lydia after class to have a discussion about the proper way to treat your classmates. I went riding and found myself overlooking a valley at the south end of the school's property. Suddenly, I heard a snake. All I could think of was that I had disturbed him. It sounded like it was getting ready to strike. Well, I remembered what Pa and the boys had always told me. I backed away slowly looking at the spot where I thought the noise was coming from so that I could see if it was moving closer to me or not. When I got to my horse, I mounted up and turned him back toward the school. By the time I returned to the school, I had calmed down enough to realize that if I had been bitten by the snake, with as far out from the school as I was, I most likely would not have made it back to the school alive. It was a sobering thought and when I went inside to go to my room and clean up for dinner, I met with Mrs. Anderton. She asked me about what had happened. I explained. Then she told me that she thought I needed to come back here. I thought she was talking about sending me away permanently. But she reassured me that she just thought I could use a bit of a break after that type of scare. So I asked if I could help with dinner. She let me come into the kitchen and help, thinking that it would allow me some time to calm down." Karen sniffled a bit. "Mrs. Anderton didn't even want me attending classes while I waited for you to come and collect me. She sent me to the nurse's office after breakfast and told me to wait there."
"I'm glad Mrs. Anderton is so understanding," Audra said. She was almost as worried about Karen's state of mind as her mother was.
"I think I speak for everyone when I say that I think Karen made an excellent choice with Mrs. Anderton's school. The woman is obviously well versed in assisting young women with their education as well as their life choices." Jarrod's voice rang true for everyone at the table. "She's taking good care of our newest family member and I applaud her for that."
"Here! Here!" Nick chimed in. "Our newest little sister has been blooming just in the short time she's been there and I see big things in store for her in the future." He lifted his glass and everyone else around the table did the same. Karen lifted hers after a moment and smiled at those around her. They had truly become family to her.