Wow, THANK YOU for all the support! I really appreciate the lovely reviews. I really mean it. I never thought so many people would like what I write.
This is probably the last chapter posted this year so HAPPY NEW YEAR to everybody!
(Can't wait for 3rd January cause this three-week break from H50 is killing me.)
All eyes were fixed on the young doctor with a file in her hands, a deathly silence filling the room, everyone waiting for the news. "Unfortunately Commander McGarrett was showing the symptoms of the extremely serious syndrome, and further testing just confirmed what I've been afraid of. He needs immediate surgery."
"But… Doc, he was stable, what happened? What is this syndrome?" Danny asked.
"The abdominal compartment syndrome," she said. "It develops when the intra-abdominal pressure rapidly reaches certain pathological values and is sustained at those values."
Danny looked at her in confusion. He had no idea what was she talking about and the doctor noticed, so she continued with the explanation.
"Just as a sprained ankle or broken arm swells, abdominal organs swell after an injury, particularly if there was a surgery. This swelling increases the pressure in the abdomen and it squeezes the organs, restricting their blood supply, which causes pain and then organ damage. The increasing pressure impairs pulmonary, cardiovascular, renal and gastrointestinal function, causing multiple organ dysfunction and failure."
That wasn't what Danny wanted to hear. His jaw dropped and panic surged through him with the explanation of Steve's condition. The concerned look on the doctor's face gave away the seriousness of the situation.
"Detective, I'm afraid that his pre-existing condition might be a complication."
Before she could continue, Catherine jumped into the conversation. "Wait. What pre-existing condition? Her gaze jumped from Danny to the doctor and back, her jaw opened."
"The liver transplant," the doctor spoke up. "It's healed by now, but I'm concerned due to increased stress and pressure to the organs as the result of ACS."
Catherine's gaze met Danny's, he could see a hint of blame in her eyes as she had no idea. But it wasn't up to him to tell her about it. And now was not the time to argue about her not knowing either.
"Is there anything that can be done?" Catherine asked, her voice shaking.
"We need to surgically decompress the abdomen remains. If he makes it through the surgery, we'll have to use one of the temporary abdominal closure techniques in order to prevent secondary intra-abdominal hypertension," the doctor explained.
"How… How bad is it, doc?" Danny stuttered. "What are his chances?"
"I won't sugar-coat it," she said. "The mortality rate associated with the ACS is significant, ranging between sixty to seventy percent."
Danny blinked in disbelief, a slow shake of his head asking if he'd actually heard wrong. The doctor's words were like a slap into the face. Danny's heart began to beat even faster than before and he caught a glimpse of Catherine slumping back to the chair.
"And that's not considering the other injuries of Commander McGarrett and the possible infection," the young doctor added. "If he's got any family members who should know, I think it's time to call them."
Danny shook his head wildly. No. He wasn't about to give up on him, not until there was still the slightest chance for his best friend. And he wouldn't let go of this chance until the end.
The doctor caught his distress, it was not easy for her to deliver such news to the families of her patients, but it had to be done. "Detective, I don't know whether he'll recover," she said with compassion in her voice. "But quite often the determination and will of the patient have an affect on the range of the recovery."
"There is no one more determined than McGarrett," Lou said without hesitation and Tani nodded in agreement.
But Danny knew his partner better. He exchanged the glances with Catherine and immediately knew she was thinking the same. Steve was a fighter, but he questioned his life since he has returned from Mexico, he blamed himself for the deaths of people he loved, his family. And after what happened during his capture, Danny was sure Steve would question it even more. He'd been forced to go against everything he believed in, forced to hurt the people closest to him. And Danny wasn't sure if Steve would ever be able to forgive himself. So his will to fight was quite questionable at the moment.
"Maybe not this time," he breathed in defeat and briefly closed his eyes in concern.
"I'll call Mary," Lou said without questioning Danny's doubts, holding his hand on his colleague's shoulder.
Danny stood there, stunned, not able to say anything else. He zoned out, unable to hear the words being spoken by the people around him. The doctor's voice brought him back to senses.
"Sorry, can you repeat what you just said?" he asked her.
"I said, the surgery might take a couple of hours, so feel free to leave and come back. I'll keep you informed."
Lou thanked the doctor when he realized Danny wouldn't reply. They watched her walk away in silence.
It took a minute to Danny to unfreeze and decide what emotion did he feel, the rage toward the person who did this to Steve. Then without saying another word or looking back, he walked away.
"Danny?" Tani shouted after him.
"Where are you going, man?" Lou asked, but received no reply. "Danny!"
"Maybe he's going to get something to eat finally?" Tani said hesitantly, her voice suggested that even she didn't believe that.
"Eat? My ass. How long have you known him? You know damn well where he's going."
"Danny?" Quinn asked in surprise as the glass door of the headquarters flung open with a thud.
Junior creased his forehead. "I thought you wanted to stay with Steve," he said. "Is everything all right?"
"How is he?" Adam asked, noticing Danny's distress.
"In surgery, fighting for his life," Danny replied, forcing those words out.
"What?" Junior said. "Lou said he was stable."
Danny nodded, glancing over the screen with the case-related information. "He was, now he's not. Long story short, the doctor told me to call his family and let them know that he… uh, he…" He couldn't say it out loud. Let his sister know Steve will probably die. Tell her to come to Hawaii so she has a chance to say goodbye if she comes on time. How could that even be an option?
A grave silence filled the room with the new information.
"What do we know about her?" Danny interrupted the silence, glowering onto the screen.
No one answered immediately, ashamed of telling Danny they don't have anything useful on Esther's whereabouts.
"I said, what do we know?" Danny yelled, unable to hold his feeling at bay anymore.
"We're doing everything we can," Junior said eventually. "But…"
"That's obviously not enough," Danny growled, raising his voice even more. "Try harder."
Danny felt Adam's hand on his shoulder. "Hey, I know you're worried about Steve," he said. "We all are. But this isn't helping, Danny. Screaming at that kid won't make it any faster. None of us have been sleeping for more than two hours since Steve disappeared. We'll find her. We won't rest until we do. I don't care how long that takes. But we have to work together, not against each other."
Adam released his grip when Danny nodded finally.
"We've questioned all the remaining men of Bennett's crew, but no matter what we tried, they wouldn't speak," Quinn said.
"Are any of them still here?" Danny asked.
"One of them. Kawena Mano."
That was enough information for Danny. Without a word he headed downstairs, rage bubbling in his veins. Junior tried to go after him, but Danny stopped him straight away. "No, I want to go alone," he said and the young man nodded in understanding.
He was trembling with anger when he opened the door of the interrogation room and saw an angry Hawaiian man cuffed to the chair in the middle of the room.
"Hey, you can't keep me here this long, I want to speak to your boss," Mano growled through gritted teeth.
"My boss, huh?" Danny could feel the blood boiling in his veins. "I'd like to talk to him too, you know? But thanks to your boss he's now fighting for his life. So you'll tell me where do I find her and maybe you'll walk out of here in one piece."
"I don't know what you're talking about. And I already told your colleagues I don't know where she is."
"Oh you don't know," Danny threw him a fake smile. "You see, I think you know very well. And you're gonna tell me."
"Look, Bennett's just paid me to do the job, to set up the explosive, that's it," Mano protested. "I didn't even saw those people till yesterday. Why the hell would she tell me about her back up plan?"
"Cut the crap. Where is she?" Danny barked, curling his hands into the fists.
"I'm telling the truth," Mano yelled.
Danny's fist flew at him in a blur before he knew it, causing his head to whip to the side. A small streak of blood dripped from his mouth to his white t-shirt.
"You can't do this, you're a cop!" he yelled as he gave Danny a look full of anger.
"Oh I can," Danny said. "I can and I will until you tell me what I want to know." A left hook caught Mano's right cheek, sending him into a world of hurt.
"I'll file a complain," he said when he regained his senses.
"Yeah, you do that," Danny didn't back off. "But there is no one here, no cameras, no witnesses. You could just be hurt in action, you know?" He reached for his gun and noticed Mano's eyes grew wide.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Mano yelled. "I told you guys everything I know, I swear!"
Danny aimed his P30 in Mano's direction and their eyes locked. He could see the real fear in the man's eyes. "I'll ask nicely one more time," Danny said. "Where do I find Esther Bennett?"
"You're insane! I don't know, I swear!" Mano's voice was trembling, his eyes on the gun in Danny's hand. "I… I would have told you if I knew. I don't care about her, I don't even know her!"
A loud bang echoed the small room, followed by an agonized cry of the man in the chair, a red stain seeping through his pants on his left knee. Danny watched Mano twisting his body in an attempt to ride off the pain. Danny's body was trembling with white rage aimed toward Esther and Aaron. He was glad at least one of them was dead, but he couldn't just let the other one go. The problem was, he believed Mano. His instincts had been telling him that man wasn't lying.
"You… can't... You can't do this!" Mano shrieked, his breathing ragged. "I need an ambulance!"
Danny's phone buzzed in his pocket. Glancing on the screen he could see it was Catherine. He moved outside of the interrogation room, so he wouldn't hear Mano's screams and cries.
"Cath?" he answered the phone, his voice trembling.
"He's out of surgery," she said, skipping any pleasantries. "He's alive but in critical condition. I think he'd like you to be here."
"I'll be there in fifteen," Danny said. There was nothing more to be done here anyway.
"Danny, it's bad. I mean, really bad," Catherine burst into tears. "I don't know how he's even still alive."
"Maybe he decided to fight, after all," Danny said, trying to reassure himself more than Catherine. He desperately wanted to believe it.
Steve's mind was going blank. Was he awake? No, he wouldn't call it awake. But he was aware of himself. Not so much for the surroundings. He couldn't move, couldn't open his eyes. He couldn't feel anything, anything at all. Everything felt so numb, it was oddly comfortable. He felt so exhausted, he just wanted to drift back to sleep that brought respite from all the thoughts. But sleep means the end, doesn't it? But he felt so sleepy. He wished he could just move his body, even if just a little. If he was going to die, at least he wanted to die comfortably.
Catherine stepped into Steve's room and closed the door softly. She turned around and looked at the man lying on the bed in front of her. His eyes were shut. White sheets were draped neatly over his body, covering him all the way up to his shoulders, his arms resting on top. There was a cannula in the top of his hand, the connecting tube winding up to the clear plastic bag suspended high above the bed. The heart monitor on the opposite side beeped away, the blips regular and calm, the peaks on the machine's screen shallow and consistent. She tried to keep the tears away as she took in the scene. Steve looked way worse than the last time she was with him. This time there was also a tube down his throat, and a ventilator pumping the air into and out of Steve's lungs.
Catherine remembered what the doctor said about the organ dysfunction due to the pressure in his abdomen and let a single tear drop down her cheek. That was probably the reason he wasn't able to breathe on his own anymore.
She stared at him. Catherine couldn't help but think how stunning his face was, even after the ordeal he'd been through. She was extremely grateful Steve came into her life and was now too scared of losing him for good. Scared of not being able to fix what happened between them. He was a good man, one of the best she'd ever known. He didn't deserve to die like this.
She headed to the plastic chair next to the bed and slouched down. Catherine continued to sit, staring at his face. "I can't… I can't lose you, Steve," she whispered, blinking away the tears. "Not again."
Catherine paused, almost expecting Steve to open his eyes, but nothing happened. "I know you're in there. And I need you to fight. Just come back, please. Everything will be fine, I promise. We'll figure it out."
When Danny returned to the hospital, it was just him and Catherine again. Tani and Lou decided they would be more useful working on finding the responsible person. He headed toward Steve's room and was about to open the door when he saw Dr. Cliff.
"Doc?" he got her attention. "How is he?"
"Well, the surgery was a close call, we almost lost him. But he made it eventually," the doctor said. "But as expected due to his injuries and the prolonged exposure to dirty bandages, I'm afraid that the infection has spread to his bloodstream, which will make his recovery even harder. He's running a high fever and we have him on antibiotics. He's still in critical condition and I can't guarantee he won't suffer the secondary intra-abdominal hypertension. Which, in his current weakened state would definitely be fatal."
Danny, unable to respond, brushed his fingers through his hair and glanced around nervously. He hoped it was all just a bad dream and he would wake up soon. Because this couldn't be true. One minute Steve was talking to him and then he wasn't breathing. And even after his heart decided to give it another try and beat again, the doctor kept saying he might still die. All because he left him alone. For a minute. Sixty seconds. That's all it took for Steve's condition to become much worse than before.
"Do you know when he is going to wake up?" he asked, intentionally using the word 'when' instead of what had really been on his mind.
"Not anytime soon," the doctor replied. "He's sedated and I don't expect him to wake up today. I suggest you get some rest, I suspect you could use it as well."
"Thanks, doc," Danny said and waited for the doctor to leave before he entered the room and sat into the chair.
He watched Steve in silence, the fact he wasn't even breathing on his own anymore worried him. But other than that, he seemed resting peacefully. Steve looked way worse than before the second surgery. Danny hasn't seen him in such a shape since the time he had to land the plane on the beach and save Steve's life by sharing his liver with him. And here he was now, fighting for his life again. But this time, there was nothing he could do to help him. Not until he wakes up.
"Damn it, Steven," Danny cursed, burying his face into his hands in frustration. "I told you not to get yourself killed, didn't I? So better wake up soon so I can kick your ass for having me worried again."
Barely holding the tears back, Danny took Steve's hand into his and squeezed it lightly. "Don't you dare to die on me, partner," he whispered. "I need you."
Steve wasn't fully aware of his surroundings, he was not completely awake. But he was not asleep either. He could hear a voice talking to him sometimes, but he couldn't match it with the face nor he could make out any words, but he didn't really care, it felt comforting just to listen to that voice.
He felt so weak. He could feel something attached to his arms, but his eyes were too tired to open, his head was too heavy to take a look, his limbs too heavy to lift.
It was getting harder to breathe, why was it getting harder to breathe? He should move, but he couldn't make his body move at all. He was too weak, too tired.
He was cold. He wished he could move his body to warm up or wrap a blanket around him. At least he felt no pain, not any longer, but his body kept shivering to warm itself up. Everything was numb and cold.
At least he was lying comfortably. And it felt like it'll be over soon. He just had to lay there and wait for the end. But he didn't mind, he didn't try to fight the inevitable. He's been in such a situation several times before, but for the first time ever he didn't feel the need to fight, he felt the acceptance instead. He was too exhausted, he didn't have the strength to fight anymore anyway. He'll just wait. Wait for his final breath.
*to be continued*
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