Christian's P.O.V.-
I'd been pacing outside the stadium's doors for what felt like an hour now. Seriously, how long are they gonna practice for? We're gonna get caught. I did a double check just to make sure no one- particularly no teachers- were around. "Nugh, coach is going to kill us," I rubbed the back of my neck. It was getting pretty late; the surroundings already had the evening dew on them from the day's humidity. I realized why no one was around; curfew was at eight, after all. Even we'd be in hot water if we were caught out here, incidentally breaking curfew. Man! Why'd Paul rope me into this? He may be the quarterback, but couldn't he have at least waited until tomorrow morning to do this?
My god, you can't imagine how uptight and nervous I got when a sudden rustle of some leaves echoed from the distance. I straightened up like a shot, instantly spinning my feet around to give me full view of the courtyard. Nothing. Being a wolf and therefore nocturnal animal, I had better eyesight at night than most. I had to make myself relax when I saw zero animals in the vicinity. All this did was make me wish Paul and Rob would hurry the hell up. But oh, it got so, so much worse.
Soon following the twig snapping were the sounds of these tiny, little footsteps- like baby footsteps. It sounded like whoever it was, was trying to intentionally be quiet. Not a bad strategy if they're like us and breaking curfew. I wasn't really worried since a teacher would most definitely make their presence known, until….
My dear god… It was like this pink aura was suddenly streamlining through the evening air. Pink… That's the best way I can describe it. Being a wolf also heightens my sense of smell, which picked it up immediately. My head slowly, slowly turned in the direction where it was coming from. It was such a vivid scent that I could almost visually see it. Like a river flowing from a spot on the other side of the courtyard on the pathway…. The sweetest, purest, most alluring smell I'd ever experienced. It was already my favourite scent without my realizing… I calmly breathed it in, and the pinkness filled me- it touched me in the most intimate way. It caressed and entered every fibre of my being. I became pink inside… Pink and smelling of perfection.
It was the most perfect scent to ever exist; my own personal drug. And I knew right then and there that I would never, ever have enough.
It didn't hit me right away; I was so absorbed in the sensation, the elation of inhaling such pink perfection. But soon the logical part of my mind kicked into gear and I knew… this scent, this glorious smell- it was from an herbivore. My frikin god, I'd never smelt anyone like that before; I didn't know angels went to our school. But the smell did something else to me; something not so desirable.
I suddenly felt the blood throughout my entire body begin to boil; I felt like a boiling pot of water was poured inside of me. Every muscle tensed on its own accord. It was as if my body was contracting with itself. I growled, trying to regain control of my limbs. It was painful- really painful. But it was more agonizing when I fought it. This… I abruptly grasped with total horror. This was my instincts flaring up. That scent…. That perfect smell permeating the air… It was sending me right into beast-mode.
Perhaps that's why I don't quite remember the next few seconds, although I have a pretty good idea of what happened. Whoever was walking along the trail suddenly stopped and I knew that they knew I was there. I could smell their fear… My feral instincts went into overdrive at this. I'd never smelt anything so perfect before… So….
Delicious.
She. It was a she. And she was a lamb. No one her natural scent was so intoxicating. Seeing her in the flesh made things a thousand times worse. My arms and legs took on a life of their own. Before I cognitively knew what was happening, she was running away from me and me….. I was charging at full speed towards her. I'd never ran faster in my life; I could have cared less how noisy I was. All that my brain could focus on was her- this helpless, delicious lamb- and how she was going no one.
I actually leapt at her when I was close enough. I didn't pin her to the ground, instead wrapping both arms around her small body. We collided with such force that we actually knocked over to the ground. There, I held her so close, so tight in arms, unwilling to let her even wiggle. My head was besides hers, resting on her shoulder; both of our eyes were gigantic. For a minute, she didn't scream or cry; I think she was too stunned at what was happening. And when my feral instinct started to subside, so was I. Still, I didn't let her go. I couldn't…. Both our hearts were beating so loudly that you could hear them.
What's happening to me? Why can't I control my own body? I should release her, but I can't; my arms won't let me. She's so petit and warm. I love the way she feels in my arms; I'd never felt anything like this before. But it's wrong…. This is wrong. I can feel my arm getting damp from her heavy breathing. Beneath these clothes, just how much…..? What I would give just to have a taste…..
It was around this point that she started to scream and call out for help. I had to cover her mouth with one of my hands. This really set her into panic-mode; I felt her move a lot in my arms. Not that she could break free from my iron grasp; I was so, so much stronger than her, this lamb. While she trembled, my other hand started to gently caress the side of her forearm. So soft, so tender….. so mouth-watering. I wanted to stop but I physically couldn't; by body had regained control of itself. This made me curse my own strength for the millionth time. Dammit all, stop! Stop touching her, hand! Let her go, for god's sake! What are you going to do with her, now that you have her? Why don't you just let go?! Am I… Am I really so much… of a monster as this?
Kill her. My head perked up in horror. That voice….. that was my voice! An inner voice deep buried inside of me. The predator voice I'd repressed for years; I haven't heard it since I was little! I won't let myself hear it! This sicko continued to speak to me as I tried so hard to push him out. You're doing the right thing. Kill her; do it quickly. No! No! I can't… I won't! I'm not you! I'll never be you! I'm no monster lurking in the darkness, hunting innocent lives. Oh, but you; you most certainly are. You've struggled like this for so, so long. You've reached your limit, I'm afraid. No, I haven't! Nothing and no one could ever make me reach that limit! I will never murder with my own hands- wolf or no wolf! I do not kill, end of story!
Why do you still deny who you really are? You are a wolf, and wolves hunt lambs. Never! You've suppressed yourself ever since you were young; hiding your true strength from the world. Use it now- show me your true might by devouring this girl. Eat her; tear her flesh off. No, I refuse! No matter how much you beg; no matter how much you pled, I'll never give in to temptation! Doesn't that frustrate you? Aren't you sad, never being truly satisfied? "Stop!" I gasped out loud, which I'm sure confused the lamb. I know she knew I wasn't talking to her per se. But the sinister predatory voice inside my mind wouldn't relent.
No, maybe you are not sad or frustrated. Maybe… you are overjoyed from the bottom of your heart, to finally have the perfect prey here in your arms. "Stop… stop it! That's not it at all!" Look at yourself; try as you might, you cannot escape who you are. You can't run away from yourself. This side of you will grow hungrier and hungrier. "No, it won't! Shut up! Do you hear me? Just shut up!" My eyes winced in the most desperate way possible. It looks like you are ready. And now, this is where the fun starts. Open your mouth and bite down- bite hard! Do it in one mouthful. I can't… I can't do it! Why does it have to be this way?! Why do I always crave….? For seventeen years now, you've waited patiently, yearning for this taste. No! No way! It doesn't matter how much I want to try…. I can't kill her! She's an innocent girl, and I'm just…. Eat her! Eat her!
That's when I felt my fingernails, which are more like claws- let's be honest- start to dig into her arm. She jolted in pain and a new wave of fear. My body was still in beast-mode so I couldn't retract my hand just yet, but then… a miracle.
"Christian!" Rob's voice hollered from the stadium doors. Thank goodness, that ended everything. I regained complete control of my body. Both my hands instantly retracted, releasing her right away; my one hand was stained with her fresh blood. She let out a sharp wheeze, immediately making a run for it away from me. She accidently- or perhaps intentionally- kicked me weakly in the process. The trail of pink lingered behind her as she ran. I watched her frantically sprint across the yard and into the nearest building with humongous eyes, as it slowly hit me what I'd done. I almost… I almost killed her! While I was sitting there in utter shock and disgust with myself, Rob rushed over to me.
"Dude, we gotta go! Paul saw one of the janitors in the aisles!" Go….? My eyes lifelessly gazed up to Rob's panicked face. T-that's…. that's right, I'm supposed to being watch for them…. Rob blinked down at me confused. "Wait, what are you doing, Christian? Did something happen?" Did something happen? I carefully stood back up, still getting used to the ability to control my body again. My eyes were low and I didn't even notice that one of my hands were red. I thought I should say something but couldn't think of the right words. What was I to say? I can't mentally comprehend what just occurred, or how enraged I am with myself.
But before Rob could say anything, we heard the door slam shut. We looked to see Paul darting towards us, motioning with his finger for us to be quiet. "We gotta get outta here," he exclaimed in a whisper when he reached us. "Ok, let's go," Rob nodded. I didn't do anything. Or at least I didn't until Paul patted me on the shoulder. I suddenly turned at the feeling of being touched, and stared at him with wide, alarmed eyes. He smiled at me. "Thanks for keeping watch, Grey." No response. "Christian?" His eyebrow lifted. "O-oh! Uh, n-no… no problem," that voice now sounded foreign to me. He relaxed his face muscles a bit. "Did everything go alright?"
When he asked me that, I had to hide my hand behind my back as I suddenly remembered the bloodstain. "Y-yes….."