Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the Kim Possible series are all owned by Disney the great and powerful. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.
Trouble, from Cage the Elephant's album Tell Me I'm Pretty.
Trouble on my left, trouble on my right
I've been facing trouble almost all my life
Trouble
"You look like Lara Croft," commented Shego as Kim found her at the breakfast buffet the next morning.
Kim, in khaki shorts and olive drab top, didn't respond to the comment. She spread a napkin on her lap, but before tasting any food, "Ron called me an idiot."
"Huh?"
"He called me, said you called him to complain about my behavior. He took your side, said I was behaving badly."
"Ron Stoppable?"
"You remember him, don't you? Blond guy, freckles, about your height? You talked with him on the phone last night?"
"Oh, that Ron Stoppable. He called you? I'm not clear on this 'he took my side' thing."
"You called him to complain about me?"
"Not really. Well, sort of – yeah."
"He agreed I was acting badly. I'm sorry. Look, I'll have your back if you want today or just let you look around Bergen by yourself and stay on the ship – your choice."
Shego looked suspicious, "Did he tell you about Alice Hypothetical?"
"Who?"
"Someone he doesn't trust."
"No, he–"
"Never mind. Doesn't matter. Are you going to demand some kind of payment?"
"No strings attached. But, you think my job is watching you. So you shouldn't be surprised if I am when you're back. I'd like to have a drink with you and hear about your day, but I'll keep a little distance tonight if you prefer – give you a break."
"But still be watching me from a distance."
"You claim it's my job."
Shego hesitated a moment, "Maybe we'll have a drink together. Maybe you have to stay behind your potted plant. Let me see how I feel tonight."
"Do you want me to watch to see if anyone tails you today or not?"
"Pretty sure there shouldn't be anyone, but in case anyone didn't get the memo I'd like a warning."
Kim desperately wanted to ask if Shego's comment no one should be tailing her today meant that later in the cruise she might be expecting a follower or attacker, but she kept her mouth shut.
They weren't together in the throng of passengers waiting to disembark. As planned, Shego tried a couple basic tricks to expose a follower, walking down one street for a couple blocks and then doubling back as if she had gone in the wrong direction. Kim had remained in a fairly open area and watched to see if Shego's tactic exposed anyone following the green woman. It appeared there was no follower, but the sheer number of passengers at the moment made it impossible to be certain. Kim kept her distance and continued to shadow Shego.
At lunch Shego tried to give no sign she was aware of Kim on the other side of the small restaurant. Kim had given her no sign of seeing anything suspicious. Shego felt like she was being followed. She was being followed, by Kim, and she knew it. "Is that why my Spidey sense is tingling?" she asked herself. Maybe she should ask Kim to join her for the afternoon, would she still feel like she was being tailed? "She's Kim Possible, I will not ask her to shop with me. She apologized this morning. That could be a trick, to lull me into thinking... Who knows what Kim is trying to do." On the other hand, she wanted an opinion on a scarf she'd seen that morning.
Shego stood right by the exit.
Kim hesitated, not sure what to do after paying her bill. She was trying to give Shego space, the way she had promised. But with Shego standing at the exit Kim would be forced to invade the older woman's zone. But she couldn't just stand there forever, she needed to leave. Maybe it would be okay to pass by Shego and find someplace to stop and wait for Shego to decide where she was going and start moving again.
"Say, are you Kim Possible?" Shego asked as Kim walked by.
"Uh, yes," Kim answered.
"Here alone, or with someone?"
"I'm, ah, here alone."
"Look, I hate to bother you, but I'm wanting another woman's opinion on something I saw this morning."
"I don't–"
"It was a scarf."
"You want my opinion on a–"
"A scarf, right. If you have a minute I'd like to hear what you think. Please?"
Kim hesitated, then smiled. "Sure. I'd love to. Maybe there's something there I'd like too." Kim almost tried to link arms with Shego for the walk back, but fought the urge. She remembered standing in a leather goods shop and waiting while Shego was looking at scarves. There had been some pretty ones in the shop. But it wasn't the scarves that made Kim feel so happy, it was Shego asking her to go with her to shop.
They spent an hour looking at scarves. They didn't plan on spending so long, but they enjoyed their time together.
"This is the one I wanted an opinion on," Shego said as soon as she found it.
Kim ordered Shego to wrap it around her throat, looked it over critically, had the older woman turn. Kim rearranged the scarf slightly, and ordered Shego to turn again. "Buy it," was Kim's opinion.
"You sure?"
"Positive."
"Thanks I'll pay for this and–"
"Don't be in such a hurry. I saw something else for you... And I want to look at something. Can I get your opinion?"
"I will not get this for myself," Kim thought when Shego handed her a green scarf to try. "Shego will think she can tell me what to do."
"It's you," Shego told her. "Love the contrast with your hair."
"I getting this because it is a great scarf," Kim told herself as she folded it up. "Not because green is Shego's color."
When they were done at the shop Kim had three scarves to purchase, Shego two. Shego raised an eyebrow at the number Kim wanted.
"One's for my mom," Kim explained. "This one's for Ron."
"Not sure how he'll look in it."
"He'll pay me back, then give it to his mom. He's lousy at picking out gifts."
Kim took Shego to the leather goods shop where she had waited while the green woman had first looked at scarves. Shego purchased a small wallet for organizing credit cards. Nothing was said, but they remained together for the rest of the afternoon. Had anyone been following Shego they would have been too busy laughing and talking to notice the surveillance. Fortunately no one was following either of them.
"Wear the scarf to dinner tonight," Shego ordered as they returned to the ship.
Kim almost said 'no' from force of habit. "I look good in it?" Kim managed after a few seconds' pause.
"You look great in it," Shego assured her.
Shego mentally kicked herself all the way back to her own cabin. "Do not compliment Alice Hypothetical," she reminded herself. "She is Kim Possible, and she's just watching me because it's her job."
She caught herself taking more time than usual with her makeup before dinner, and delivered another mental kick to herself.
At the same time, it felt wonderful when Kim stared and said, "Wow! You look great!" when they met for dinner.
"This old face? I've had it for years."
After they began eating Shego noticed, "Got a woman staring at us," she whispered.
"Probably jealous." "Where?"
"Nine o'clock. Two shades of blue and some brown."
Kim looked left and her heart sank. It was Rose Gardner, sitting by Will Du, who was speaking with her in an animated fashion. The mission leader did not look happy. Kim wondered which was causing Rose greater distress – seeing Kim seated by Shego or having to endure Will Du's complaints. The combination of both was probably hell.
"What are you doing?" hissed Shego as Kim pushed back from the table.
"Inviting her to come over. Old friend," Kim explained as she walked away.
"Is she..." Shego began, then fell silent – unwilling to shout the question across the dining room. "Probably another Global Justice agent. Didn't Kim say the mission leader was a woman? No fucking way."
Will actually managed to fall silent for a moment as Kim approached, giving Kim the opportunity to extend an invitation to Rose Gardner, "Would you care to join Ms. Jade and me for dinner? Unless you need Will's report."
Rose glared at Kim, torn between anger at Kim for unprofessional conduct and gratitude for being offered a chance to escape. "Thank you. I've been curious about this Ms. Jade."
"But–" protested Will.
"I'll call a meeting of Justice agents and lecture them about treating fellow agents with respect," she promised.
"I warned you about this," Rose whispered as she walked back to the table where Shego waited.
"I thought you just meant don't get drunk and make out," replied Kim in her own whisper.
"You know that–" began Rose, but stopped as Kim made introductions.
"Alexis Jade, this is Rose Gardner, a friend. Rose, I've known Alexis for years."
"And what an amazing coincidence that Kim and I should run into each other on the cruise," Shego commented dryly. "Does Kim know you from work?"
"From work?"
"Oh, she works for Global Justice. I followed Kim's career from a distance for years. I used to be an international criminal, and Kim and I fought all the time. I heard she joined Global Justice after graduating from college."
"Very interesting. Used to be a criminal you say?"
"Oh, some people still think I am. I'm certain that's why Global Justice assigned her to monitor me on the cruise." Shego's voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper, "The ship is crawling with security agents."
"And you were asking if I was one?"
"So rude. I'm sorry. One should never ask someone if they're a security agent."
"Apparently Ms Possible felt free to tell you."
"No, I told you, I already knew she worked for Justice. She almost tried to deny it, but she's too honest. I mean, really? A security agent who tells the truth? Unbelievable. My brain wasn't working for a moment. If you worked for Justice – which you don't, of course – I was going to assure you Kim was thoroughly professional in monitoring me today and keeping me from doing evil."
"Very interesting, Ms. Jade, but–"
"Call me Shego, everyone does."
"Very well, Shego. I hear Kim's behavior was much less than professional a couple nights ago."
Shego shrugged, "Old friends meeting again after years? Kim did get a little too celebratory. I hear she really got called on the carpet for it. She says her supervisor is a real bitch who–"
"I did not say that," protested Kim.
"I'm sure Ms Jade is embroidering the story for dramatic effect," Rose told Kim. "Perhaps she even imagines I work for this Global Justice agency and would rise to the bait and admit it if you insulted her supervisor. Or maybe she hoped to get you in trouble. She said the two of you used to be enemies? You seem terribly chummy just now."
Shego leaned back on her chair and laughed. Straightening up she addressed Rose, "I like you. Stay with us for dinner? It'll help Kim stay sober."
"She had invited me to join you." She looked back at Will Du, fuming at her former table. "Thank you, I think I will."
As they finished dinner Rose commented, "So, Shego, you say Kim was assigned to watch you because you're considered dangerous?"
"Well, she won't admit it, but she won't deny it either. Since I know she's a Global Justice agent I knew she had to be assigned to watch me. She'd avoid me if it weren't for orders."
"She seems to be keeping a close eye on you, a very close eye."
Kim blushed.
"Oh, she's an amazingly dedicated agent. I know her too well for there to be any way she could stay hidden, so she decided to stay close. But if you worked for Justice, which of course you don't, I'd assure you she won't get drunk again."
"You shouldn't be making promises for her," Rose said, pushing back from the table. She looked at Kim after standing up, "Eight o'clock tomorrow?"
Kim swallowed nervously, "Yes."
Rose left. Kim glared at Shego, "I am in so much trouble now."
"No you're not. She seems like a very smart woman. I assume she's your supervisor."
"If you think that, why did you tell her I said my supervisor was–"
"I'm evil, remember? That's why you're watching me."
"Sure, like that would impress her," muttered Kim, "if she were my supervisor. And what would I tell her tomorrow when I see her, if she were my supervisor?"
"At eight," Shego reminded her. "She said eight for her to chew you out, if she were your supervisor. I would limit myself to one or two drinks tonight, if I were you – which I'm not. And I'd suggest it would probably be a very bad idea for you to flirt with me this evening, if I were me, which I am."
"I thought condemned men were given anything they wanted for their last meal."
"Careful, Pumpkin, sounds like you're offering to eat me."
Kim blushed, "That wasn't what–"
"I know. Now, let's blow this popcorn stand. How about we head for the theater and order drinks before the show? Another option would be the condemned getting roaring drunk, so you can face the music with a hangover that will make the electric chair sound more attractive than living. But I promised the woman, who is not your supervisor, that I'd make sure you didn't get drunk and I'm pretty sure they can't sentence you to the electric chair for messing up surveillance. If you messed up surveillance."
"Did I mess up?"
"Jury is still out on that one. But I'll tell you one thing."
"Yes?"
"I had fun today."
"Really?"
"Yep."
"Me too."
"Breakfast tomorrow after you get chewed out, or will you be grounded?"