Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the Kim Possible series are all owned by Disney the great and powerful. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.
Feudor provided me with some extra details on Stockholm. NSLC provided details on Copenhagen.
I first wanted to title this chapter Wonderful Copenhagen, a song in Danny Kaye's 1952 film 'Hans Christian Andersen'. I had considered just calling it Copenhagen, a 1924 jazz piece by Fletcher Henderson's orchestra (which included Louis Armstrong). But I was afraid some reader my confuse it with Copenhagen, a 1971 song by Chris Ledoux about snuse. So I went with Love Shop's 1997 Copenhagen Dreaming because it may actually be in Danish... How would I know? I don't speak Danish. (But the fact it's a Danish group suggests the probability.)
Kastrup DC 9 – jeg var kommet for at tage afsted
Da vi fik vingerne op kom jeg til at kigge ned
Der lå vores by under dagene på træk
Min tid gik helt i stå – hvorfor var det at jeg ville væk?.
Copenhagen Dreaming
In the morning Rose Gardner played musical agents, assigning someone else to watch Shego in case of another attack, sending Will to rest in Shego's cabin after staying up to guard Shego, and ordering Kim to provide any update.
Several agents from cooperating countries were in the Justice suite, so Kim and Rose went on deck and stood at the rail to talk privately.
"I should have reported to you yesterday evening," Kim apologized. "I was too tired to think clearly. I know more about what Shego is doing. Well, I know what she claims anyway."
"Good. You said something about a large jewel, and Thailand was the country of origin for the package in her cabin. There was a theft from the Saudi's in–"
Kim's jaw dropped open in surprise, "You knew about that?"
"Not sure if knew is the proper verb. It sounded vaguely familiar and it turned up when I used Google™. You're saying that Shego stole some of the Saudi jewelry in Thailand?"
"She says it's not stealing if you take something from a thief and return it. I... I kind of understand. Do you call it theft? She claims to have one stone and says she'll return it at the Saudi embassy in Copenhagen."
"Return, as in claim a large reward?"
"That's not illegal, is it?"
"No. I'd be surprised if there wasn't a large reward – and even more surprised if she turned it down."
"Has the man who tried to kill her been found?"
"Not the last I knew. This is a big ship. They'll be watching anyone leaving in Copenhagen. Oh, since you can identify him, you need to watch passengers who are disembarking."
"But–"
"Someone else can watch Shego, or her cabin, if that's what you're worried about."
"I am. And the doctor would like to send her to a hospital in Copenhagen for a recovery period. She's insisting on going to the embassy herself. She asked me to go with her. Since she has one arm in a sling she's not at... I'm not sure if a body-guard detail falls under my Global Justice job description or not. But I'd like to do it."
"I'm not sure, technically speaking, if it's in your job description for this mission either. But considering all the grief the original theft caused between the Thais and Saudis I think seeing it delivered safely would be a good idea... Delivered safely... Not that I distrust your Ms. Jade, but assuming she really has... Is it the blue diamond?"
"Yes."
"I wouldn't mind seeing that myself. Anyway, just in case keeping it for herself proves too much of a temptation, having you there to keep her honest wouldn't be a bad idea."
As the ship neared its Langelinie berth Kim stood on deck, looking to see if the Little Mermaid statue in the harbor currently had its head or had suffered another decapitation by vandals.
Members of the climate change conference had been out earlier on the deck, en masse, to view Denmark's wind farms in the sea. The cruise portion of the conference ended today. There would be one another day of conference, in Copenhagen, with a plenary session and banquet to end the meeting. Global Justice and other security forces theoretically remained on duty until the end of the conference. But with no reason to suspect any sort of protests the Danish police would assume the real responsibility of security at the hotel.
Most of the conference delegates and security forces were ready to disembark. There was a shuttle to take delegate luggage to the hotel – giving the attendees the freedom to enjoy the park. Kim had heard there was an excursion planned to Tivoli, but her mission of guarding Shego, and seeing the diamond returned to Saudi officials, kept Kim from considering the trip.
The man who had attacked Shego had still not been found. There were no Thai's on the passenger list. Security assumed that, if Shego's claim her attacker was Thai was correct, he carried a passport from a nation such as Malta which sold them, or a fake. Shego and Kim planned to leave after the crowd had cleared. Kim stood with the ship's security as passengers left the ship – both those who were leaving the cruise in Copenhagen and those who would continue the cruise after the stop in the Danish capital. Kim did not see Channarong among those leaving the ship. Was he still on board, and a threat to Shego? Did he have a way of surreptitiously leaving the vessel? Had he already left?
As she had threatened, Shego refused to take the pain medication the doctor prescribed, claiming it would slow her thinking. He wanted her sent to a hospital. She didn't want to go, and threatened to make him a eunuch if he didn't let her sign a waiver and discharge her. The doctor looked to Kim for help.
"She doesn't listen to me," the redhead apologized. "I'm going into the city with her to keep her safe. Give me the medication and if she gets smart and asks for–"
"Like that would happen," snorted Shego.
"You might smarten up. I believe in miracles."
Shego wasn't sure all the paperwork was necessary to sign herself out of sickbay, or whatever the cruise line called their infirmary. "Damn lawyers," she thought as she tried to sign her name again using her left hand. "And damn the lawsuit-happy crazies who make it necessary to sign all these damn waivers of liability in triplicate."
Kim helped Shego dress. Shego was finding many things difficult to manage with her arm in a sling. Kim mostly worked in silence, but asked, "Do you remember kissing me yesterday?"
"What?"
"As the pain meds kicked in. You grabbed me with your left hand and kissed me."
"Don't see any bruises."
"I didn't fight you. You were in pain and medicated. You didn't hurt me."
"I meant bruises on me. I'm surprised you didn't deck me."
"I'd say you weren't in your right mind, but when are you? Besides, like I said, your meds were kicking in and it's bad luck to punch someone with one arm."
"I really did that? I don't remember."
"Yep, you did."
"Damn... Did I enjoy... You're not just saying that so I'll ask for another pain shot, are you?"
Kim sighed, "You're done. Let's go to your cabin, then go into Copenhagen."
Rose Gardner was in Shego's cabin when the two arrived. "I'd like to see the blue diamond before you return it."
Shego glared at Kim, "You told her!"
"It's my job. You're doing nothing wrong. And I needed her permission to go along."
Shego hesitated, then shrugged. "Hell, she already knows. Kim, would you get the toothpaste from the sink?"
"Toothpaste?"
"Yep. Pop the seal at the end of the tube, squeeze out the toothpaste, and find a diamond with no cavities and strong enamel."
Kim, having the use of both hands, performed the task.
"That is impressive," Rose commented after the jewel was washed.
Shego began to offer thanks to Rose for allowing Kim to serve as bodyguard, and then realized, "She's there to keep me honest too, isn't she?"
"She is. I will assign an additional agent if you want one. The theft of the blue diamond is big and international. Global Justice is interested. Can we get a statement from you on the diamond's recovery?"
"Oh, I just got lucky and found it on the street. No idea who might have had it."
"You're lying, of course. But maybe just as well. He, or she, is probably so high in the Thai government there's nothing we could do legally. Your word against his wouldn't stand up in international court."
The taxi stopped in front of Lyngbyvej twenty. Kim and Shego looked doubtful. "You sure this is the right address?"
"Ja."
"Does that look like an embassy to you?" Kim whispered.
"Nope, looks like an office building. Maybe he doesn't speak English."
"It is address you ask," he insisted.
They paid and got out of the taxi. They figured they would find someone in the building who could tell them the real location of the Saudi embassy. The lobby office directory indicated the Saudi embassy was on the third floor.
Kim checked her watch, "We're, like, five minutes early."
"And they've probably been waiting since I called from the ship and said we'd made port."
The blinds were drawn on the door of the Saudi suite when they reached the third floor. A uniformed, and armed, Saudi standing outside the door nodded and opened it for them. He went in with them, and locked the door. Three other guards were in the room, along with three men the women identified as embassy personal, and a man whose presence surprised Kim.
At a table to one side of the room sat an old, Hasidic Jew.
"If you don't mind a question, why in the hell did you have me bring the diamond to Copenhagen?" Shego pointed to her right arm, in a sling. "I had someone trying to kill me, which could have been avoided if I just dropped it off in Stockholm."
"We wish to verify that the diamond–"
"You think I'd lie to you about having it? What kind of an idiot do–"
"You said you had it. We believed you thought you had it. But with the amount of money involved we wish to be absolutely certain, and our expert," the ambassador nodded in the direction of the Hasid, "did not wish to travel to Stockholm."
"But he came to Copenhagen?"
"Not all Jewish diamond experts are in Antwerp. And we wish him to examine the diamond because he has examined the real blue diamond in the past."
The Hasid had prepared a small work space on the table in front of him. "The diamond, please?"
Kim pulled a wad of tissue from her pocket, with the diamond inside. There was tension in the room as the Jew polished the stone, examined it under his loupe, and shone light through it from different angles for an examination Shego felt took far too long. Was there any chance she had been duped? Was the stone fake? Had the jeweler been paid to say it was fake when it was real so the Saudis could stiff her? Finally he looked up and smiled, "It is the Saudi diamond," he told the ambassador.
Everyone in the room relaxed and smiled.
The Hasid, whose fee had already been paid, gathered the tools of his trade and left.
The ambassador glanced at one of the guards, "Altair, the case." The man left the room. The ambassador turned back to Shego, "It was not certain you had the stone, so it was uncertain how you wanted payment. We have cash, if you prefer," he told her, pointing at the leather suitcase Altair now had in his hands, "or a direct electronic transfer."
"Could you open the case?"
"You don't believe the money is there? It will take you some time to count it all."
"I believe the money is all there. I just like seeing it. There are problems with taking large amounts of cash into the United States, and rather than risk it I'll go for the electronic transfer. If we can do it here and now. Still, I'd like to see what it looks like in cash money."
The ambassador laughed, "It is as I expected. The computer there," he pointed, "is set up. You need only enter your bank information. Altair, open the case."
Kim let her breath out slowly as she looked at the bundles of hundred dollar bills, certain she had never seen so many at one time before.
Shego asked, "Any bonus for my wound?"
"It is not my place to set the size of the reward. I am merely an intermediary. I am, however, authorized to offer fifty-thousand additional dollars if you will confirm or deny the name of the Thai we believe had the diamond."
"A generous offer, but I believe I can blackmail him for a lot more."
"Let that be your bonus," the ambassador told her, and gestured to the desk chair in front of the computer. It was difficult for Shego to enter her bank information using only her left hand, but she stayed at the computer until she received verification the transfer had gone through.
After leaving the Saudi embassy Shego offered, "Want something to celebrate? I'm buying."
"Sure you can afford it?" grinned Kim.
"At this point I can afford to fill a bathtub with very expensive champagne... But unless you were willing to go in with me I think it would be a waste of good champagne."
"It would be a waste of champagne even if I got in with you," Kim assured her.
They found a bar, "Something strong for me," Shego told the man behind the bar and pointed to her arm. "Need to dull the pain. Something weak for my friend, she's my designated driver."
"I'm not driving," Kim reminded her.
"Oh, you want something stronger too? I was trying not to reveal your dark secret – you get drunk easily."
"I don't get... The other night was not typical."
"Would you like a Hvidtøl?" asked the bartender.
"Hvidtøl?"
"Used to be most popular beer in Denmark, now a Christmas beer."
"Talk about seasonal beers," murmured Shego. She looked at Kim, "Try it and give me a sip? I'm going with whiskey. Can't decide if a double will do it. Maybe a triple. But I'll have the good sense to sip – not toss it back like a redhead who will remain nameless."
"I have the pain medicine the doctor prescribed," Kim reminded her. "You don't need to self-medicate."
"You deal with analgesia the way you want, I'll deal with it my way. Besides, I promised to not let you get drunk again on my watch."
"It isn't your job to watch me!" Kim insisted after they were served.
"Well it ought to me someone's job. You're watching one of the most dangerous women in the world and you get drunk your first night on duty while trying to impress her."
"One mistake! One tiny little mistake, and you'll hold it against me the rest of my life?"
"Probably."
"And you need real pain medicine, not whiskey, for your pain."
"I need..." Shego's voice softened to an uncharacteristic tone. "I don't know what I need at the moment. Thanks for being with me today. I really... Stop me before I get sloppy sentimental. You wouldn't like me if I'm sloppy sentimental."
"I think the line is I wouldn't like you if you're angry. And I don't like you when you're angry. Sloppy sentimental? Don't know if I'd like you like that or not. I've never seen you in that condition. Maybe you could try it sometime instead of the sarcastic to give me an idea."
"Maybe. I'll pencil you in for the second Tuesday of next week."
Kim's phone rang. "Hello? ... We're done at the Saudi embassy. ... No, everything was fine, we stopped for a drink afterward. ... No, I'm having a weak beer. ... No repeat, neither you nor Shego is ever going to let me forget that, are you? ... Okay, my report as soon as we're back to the ship. I need to pack. ... Okay, head back now."
"Now?" Shego asked after Kim hung up. "Can we at least finish our drinks?"
"That long. But my mission director, who you think is Rose, but I never said that, wants me back. I'm going to need to teleconference with the head of Global Justice for–"
"Will my name come up in the conversation?"
"Probably. And then there will be a report to write up. It's going to take... And I need to pack and leave the ship for–"
"Finish your beer," sighed Shego. "You're going to be too distracted to be any fun."
On arriving back at the ship agent Carlson was appointed to watch Shego in case there was another attempt on her life.
"This guy any better than Du?" whispered Shego as responsibility for her well-being was handed off.
"When he's bored he's into bad practical jokes," Kim warned. "Hopefully he'll take the job seriously. He may be the one who put itching powder in Du's underwear."
"He won't be getting close to mine," promised Shego.
"Uh... Will I see you again?"
"You can put money on it, Pumpkin."
It took Kim hours to finish everything she needed to do. After she dropped her bag in the small Copenhagen hotel room where she was to stay one night before the conference, and mission, officially ended she took out her phone to call Shego. No answer. "May be taking her awhile to answer with her left hand," Kim thought, and called again. No answer. Kim tried another number.
"Kim?"
"Rose, could you give me the number for Seth Carlson? You assigned him to watch Shego and she isn't answering her phone."
"I saw Seth a little while ago, he was... Let me give you his number."
Agent Carlson reported, "She left."
"What do you mean? She left."
"What do you think I mean. She asked me to help her pack in her cabin and called a taxi to take her to the airport. She told me she had a flight to catch to Rome."
"You let her get on a taxi and leave?"
"I wasn't told to detain her, just keep her safe! I even rode to the airport with her to make she she got there safe... And she stiffed me for the fare! I had to pay for the round trip to get back! She should have payed her own damn way!"
"Okay," thought Kim, "she didn't answer because she was on the plane. Why didn't she tell me she was leaving? She'll call when she gets to Rome." Kim was able to find the flight Shego had taken. Kim called after Shego's flight had reached Rome. There was no answer. There was no call from Rome. Could she have taken a private flight down to the Senior's island? "She promised to see me." Kim kept waiting for a phone call that didn't come.
The other agents avoided Kim on the flight back to the US. She appeared in no mood for conversation.
Angry and frustrated Kim arrived at her apartment. She stared in the trunk of her car, wondering how much she could carry in on one trip. "Luggage can wait until later. I need to get the groceries in now."
Why hadn't Shego called her? She wasn't going to call the green woman again. She absolutely wasn't going to call the green woman again. There was no way in hell she would call Shego after Shego ditched her again. Well, maybe in a couple days – just to see how Shego's arm was doing. Perhaps tomorrow... No! Shego leaving like that was a slap in the face... It had made the end of the mission... Like Shego really cared about how Kim's mission went. Shego didn't care about anything but money.
After a minute of fumbling with her key while attempting to open her door without putting a bag down, Kim put a bag down and opened the door.
Kim heard the sound of the television set in her living room, and a voice called, "You're late! You should have been back an hour ago!"
"You broke into my apartment?" yelled Kim.
"Of course not," retorted Shego. "And don't change the subject, young lady. What kept you?"
"Don't change the subject? You break into my apartment and tell me I'm late? That's the subject!"
"And I told you, I didn't break into your apartment. Your plane landed almost two hours ago – and don't tell me it was delayed, I checked with the airport. I'll be generous in how much time it took you to get your luggage and find a shuttle to the economy lot. I assume you had your car in the economy lot, right?"
"Yes, but–"
"So, you should have been back an hour... Groceries?
"Yes, but–"
Shego inhaled, "Chinese takeout?"
"Yes, why–"
"Did you bring enough to share?"
"I didn't know–"
"So the answer's no. I should have known. And you really need to up the cable channels you get, I've been watching garbage while I–"
Kim raised her voice in an attempt to complete a sentence, "What are you doing here? What do you mean, you didn't break in? You break in, and then say you didn't? Are you crazy?"
"Interesting question. But I believe if someone has a key to a place it isn't breaking in."
"I didn't give you a key to my apartment!"
"An oversight on your part. I forgive you."
"If you didn't have a key it was breaking–"
As Kim spoke Shego held up a key, "See. I didn't break in."
"That's a key to my apartment?"
"I've been telling you that since you finally got back. What is it with you not believing me? That's a lousy way to start a relationship."
Kim closed her eyes, took a deep breath and counted to ten. If a person is dreaming or hallucinating, are they aware they are dreaming or hallucinating? There was a term for knowing you were dreaming. Kim tried to recall the term.
"Something wrong?" demanded Shego.
"I'm dreaming, but I can't recall what they call it when you know you're dreaming while you're dreaming."
"I think it's lucid dreaming. But you need to be asleep to do it."
"I am asleep. Maybe I'm on the plane."
"You're in your apartment. And in addition to a better cable package I think we need to upgrade some of this furniture if you expect me to be be spending time here with you."
Kim opened her eyes, "What did you say?"
"What you thought you heard. Ron thought you wanted me spending time with you. I thought it was best idea he's ever had."
"Ron said that?"
"You remember Ron, don't you? Blond guy, freckles, about my height."
"I know Ron, I just can't believe he–"
"He was sure you wanted me here. He said you'd obviously fucked up when I told him you'd forgotten to give me a key. So he had a copy made for me."
"When did you see Ron? And he would not have said I fucked up."
"I was paraphrasing. He..." Shego sighed and closed her eyes for a second, "You haven't turned your phone on, have you?"
"Of... No. I was a little upset with your rude behavior, and–"
"My rude behavior? You don't even check your phone and you accuse me of being rude!"
"Hold on," Kim told her and turned airplane mode off on her phone. "There's a bunch of messages from Ron."
"Turns out he's a swell guy. Flew in, picked me up at the airport. We're having lunch with him tomorrow."
"Lunch?"
"Yeah, I assume we're going to be too tired to get out of bed before ten tomorrow."
"And he really gave you the key... You didn't hurt him?"
"Not a bit. He said we deserved each other... Something about irresistible force and immovable object. Dibs on being the irresistible force."
It was Kim's turn to close her eyes for a moment and sigh, "What am I going to do with you?"
"I've got a couple suggestions," smirked Shego. "How about we start by kissing each other without you being drunk or me stoned on pain meds?"
Kim smiled, "First time you've made sense since I got home."
–The End–