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Remus was waiting. His head was tilted towards the ground, his dishwater hair disheveled in a way that no comb alone could fix.
Albus could see how the years had aged him — the transformations in them even more so. He was not the boy that had stood timidly in the Great Hall awaiting his sorting or even the one that had brightened with the opportunity of friendship.
No, Remus was broken. Albus could see it in the sagging of his shoulders, the scars across his hands that could only fade so much before they were torn open again. He could see it in the bagginess of his clothing, the skeletal frame of his body beneath.
It had been twelve years since Albus had seen him, and this man of only thirty-three looked so much older.
Albus cleared his throat, announcing his presence in the small room of the Hog's Head Inn. Remus looked up, standing from the chair he had occupied. He forced a smile, his lips tightening as they stretched across his cheeks. But, his eyes were dull. Shadowed. The blue within them no longer a cloudless sky, but the churning of a relentless storm.
"Headmaster," He greeted. "It's good to see you." His arm was outstretched, his sleeve gapping around his bony wrist. Albus took it, his grip light and the shake gentle for fear he might break the man.
"Master Lupin, do sit."
Albus closed the door, locking it with a silent spell and an unnoticeable movement of his wand. He sat in an armchair similar to the one that dwarfed Remus, the questions he had brought made painful.
"Why do you believe you're qualified for this position?" Albus hated the question that came from him. He hated the way Remus stared at him, the fractures of his soul apparent through his pupils.
Remus was still for a moment, his features expressionless. "I'm not," he said finally, his voice equally flat. "I can study… I can learn, but can you honestly tell me that the others before me were better?" He leaned back in the chair, his eyes flitting to the clouded window and the world beyond, his thoughts anywhere but this room.
Albus could feel the hollowness of his heart and the sorrow that lived inside. He couldn't bring himself to break the silence that had blanketed them and knew that Remus was not done speaking. He allowed Remus to compose his thoughts, to say the things that Albus knew he dreaded.
It was a sigh that began the exchange minutes later, Remus never turning from the window. "What else do I have?" His voice splintered, cracks running along the words. "I've worked at an apothecary, a quill shop. But if they find out what I am, if I ask for time off… I've tried wandering into muggle employment, but my education isn't what they require."
Remus lifted a hand, rubbing it across his mouth as his eyes drifted closed, displaying the distraught — the need — he had tried so hard to keep beneath the surface. "The salary is never enough, and even less for a wolf… But… Hogwarts. Hogwarts has always been my home." Remus turned to Albus, meeting his gaze evenly for the first time, allowing that shimmer of hope to light his face.
It was Albus' turn to sigh. He knew what Remus was asking of him. Knew that what he could offer Remus would never be enough. "The curse on the position remains. The sanctuary I could provide would only be a year."
"A year is more than I have now."
"Is that all that brings you here? The promise of Galleons?"
Silence.
Remus looked away again, his eyes drifting to the boards beneath his feet.
Albus followed his gaze. He looked at the too-short pants that Remus wore and the frayed fabric of the hems. He looked at the shoes, patched and worn. In need of replacement — like everything else.
"You're here for James, for Harry. Aren't you?"
"Yes." Remus' voice was a harsh whisper, the word quieter than anything else he had admitted. "It's been twelve years and I haven't… I haven't done enough. I haven't… "
"He wasn't your responsibility." Albus insisted, his voice instilled with reason.
"Harry was all of ours." Remus' head snapped up, his face hardened with failed responsibility, anger at Albus' misunderstanding. "Sirius may have been his Godfather, but he's not the only one who… cared for the boy." Remus sneered at the name.
"Of course not." The corners of Albus' lips tipped upward. He would not provoke the rage he knew was buried inside of Remus. The rage that Albus had come to learn so well with his own loss.
"This is my chance, Professor. My chance to do what I should have done twelve years ago. What I was too cowardly, too… too—" His words halted, the last of them pitching upward in emotion Albus knew he was too embarrassed to display.
Albus could have filled in the space. Could have reminded Remus of his age at the time, his condition which would have only hindered parenthood, but it would only serve to wound him and Remus was already prone to doing that to himself.
And why shouldn't he hire him? Remus had fought. He had been in the Order long ago. He had taken his N.E.W.T in Defense Against the Dark Arts. The knowledge was there, but was Remus? Could the man before Albus withstand the classes? The judgments placed on him before the students even came to know their new Professor? And what about Sirius? What connections did the two of them have, if any? It would be a calculated risk, but one Albus would have to take.
It was the one thing Albus knew could heal him. The one thing he knew they both needed.
"Then it's a chance you will have."
Story Link/Title: For Harry
School: Illvermorny
Year: 3
Prompt: Fair Wages
Technique: Commas
Word Count: 987 (10% leeway)