Age 19
Unknown
I wake cold and alone, in a small room with grey honeycomb walls, floor, and ceiling. It's eerie in here, and cold. I shiver. It's a long time since I've been cold. It seeps into my muscles, urging me to be still and quiet. I don't know why.
But I remember the alley, fighting dark figures, and crashing through a window. Whatever happened after that was definitely not good, because I realize as I sit up that I'm not wearing my own clothes. I'm wearing a black t-shirt and loose, black pants, both with some kind of insignia that I can't see in the dim light. There's also an IV in my arm. I don't touch it.
Besides the bed that I'm on, the only other furniture in the room is a table at the center with a couple of chairs. Not a lot of information to go off of, but I would guess the sole purpose of this very creepy room is interrogation. It's not like I plan on escaping, though. Whoever put me here clearly knows what they're doing. The last thing I remember happening is being thrown through a window while on fire. If that's not a sign that I shouldn't be in charge of myself, I don't know what is.
Even though the walls look seamless, a door opens. I scoot back to lean against the wall. My visitor is a middle aged man in a suit, who looks friendly enough, but given the situation, I'm left to assume he's some kind of agent. He doesn't sit in the chair.
"Hi, I'm Agent Coulson." Yep, there it is. "I'm with SHIELD, we're not going to hurt you. Ally, how are you feeling?" He leans against the table. I'm a little thrown off that he knows my name.
"Like I got beat up and then thrown through a window." I hadn't actually thought about my injuries until he brought it up, but I definitely have them. I'm covered in bruises, but my ribs, hands, head, and one shoulder hurt more than the rest.
"That's fair. What were you doing in Seattle?" Were, I notice, not are. Have we moved?
"That's kind of a long story." I don't know if I'm ashamed or frightened, but suddenly it's hard to speak.
"I've got time." Time wasn't really the issue. Agent Coulson waits patiently for me to say something.
"I was looking for answers." I hate how childlike I sound. I'm 19, technically, but it didn't ever seem to matter how many times I told myself that. I still felt like a child, and unless I got my memory back, I would probably always feel this way. "I didn't mean to get in a fight, I was just trying to help, and they wouldn't let the girl go."
"Answers about your past?" I jolt like I've been shocked. "We know about your amnesia, we've been tracking you for some time. You've been under official surveillance since December."
That was a scary idea, but I knew why. "Since the fire."
"Yes. Your abilities are dangerous, and we would've contacted you sooner, but there were complications. If you're willing to answer a few questions, I might have some answers for you."
Wait. Did he know something about me, about whatever had happened to me? "I'm not trying to hide anything, but I don't know if I have the answers you're looking for."
"Let's start with last night. Why did you come to Seattle?" I told him how I'd heard that there was a human trafficking ring that was running out of the Valley around the time I was kidnapped. It was supposedly in Seattle now, but when I'd met with the guy who was supposed to know something, he'd refused to tell me anything. It sounded very reckless saying it out loud, but I'd been desperate.
"Why did you go to the office building?"
"I was wandering. I was supposed to get on a bus and head home, but I was frustrated, and… and I can't always control my powers when I get worked up. I walked around and I just kind of ended up there."
"So it has nothing to do with Asgard?"
Asgard? Wasn't that from one of the mythologies? Not Greek, Norse? Norse. That seemed incredible random, but Agent Coulson didn't sound like he was joking.
"Umm, no? What would Norse mythology have to do with human trafficking?"
"Nothing, thankfully." Coulson hesitated, then came to sit in the chair. "Ally, I know that this must be a lot to take in, but we've actually met before." I frowned. I thought I was the one that was crazy, with my black hole of a brain, but this sounds actually insane. Then again, it's not like I can argue with him. "About 3 years ago, you were part of an incident in New Mexico. You were with a group of people who claimed to be from Asgard, something we've since been able to confirm."
"Are you talking about Thor? Are you saying I've met Thor?" I knew who the Avengers were, of course. I had only been found a month or so after whatever had happened in New York. It was strange learning that in the time I'd been gone that the world had developed people with powers. It was stranger still to accept that I was one of them.
"Yes. Maybe this will help." Coulson pulled out a phone, fiddling with it for a second before showing me the screen. It looks like secret camera footage, of armored figures with swords. Three guys, two girls. I can't make out the smaller girl's face, but the red hair is mine. The figure is mine.
He shows another picture, this time with a clear view of my face. In the same frame as a large, muscular, red caped figure that I've seen on news footage. It's Thor.
I feel dizzy seeing all of this. Why couldn't I remember this? Was this why I had powers? Why I knew how to fight? It had to be, right? Even if it made no sense whatsoever?
"Ally?" I don't know how long he's been calling my name.
"I don't remember this. Even seeing it, I don't know, I can't, I don't remember anything."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I can try to answer any questions, but first I want to bring someone in to look at your injuries. I apologize for waiting, but I needed-"
"To make sure I wasn't going to hurt anybody," I finished.
"It was a necessary precaution." I'm not offended, but Coulson seems uncomfortable about the whole situation. He leaves and a short time later, two others walk in, a woman in a sweater and a lab coat and a taller man that looms ominously in the doorway. He's holding it open, letting in light from whatever was outside the room. I think it's because they're trying to make me more comfortable.
The woman kneels down next to me, opening up a med kit. "I'm Dr. Simmons, don't mind Agent Ward in the corner, he just likes to be intimidating." She fiddles with the IV for a moment and frowns, putting a hand to my forehead, then pulls out a thermometer.
"Do you feel dizzy or lightheaded?" she asks as she takes my temperature.
"Maybe a little? It mostly just hurts."
"I thought you had a fever when they brought you in, but your temperature hasn't gone down."
I shrug. "I'm always warm. My grandma thought I was sick too, when they found me, but it's always like this."
"I suppose it's not uncommon with your abilities, but you need to be sure to stay hydrated." Dr. Simmons asks about my injuries and checks me for a concussion, which would explain why it hurts to think. She decides that none of my cuts or scrapes need stitches, just bandages. She also instructs me to take it easy, after she removes the IV.
"I can't promise I won't get thrown through anymore windows," I joke, "but I'll try not to." Dr. Simmons starts to clean up, but the room shakes, knocking more supplies out of the box. "I can't do anything about earthquakes though."
Agent Ward speaks up for the first time, shaking his head. "It's just a little turbulence, nothing to worry about."
Wait, what?
"Uhhhh. Turbulence? Are we flying?" I didn't like that idea. If my abilities acted up again, if I couldn't control them, I knew I could take down a plane. I didn't want to hurt anyone.
"Yes, but I can assure you we have an excellent pilot," Dr. Simmons replies. I help her pick up the supplies that had scattered. "This would've been easier if we were in our brand new, state of the art medical pod, but unfortunately one of our agents has been injured and is still recovering."
She gets the med kit closed before the plane shakes again. It's worse this time, it's enough to slide the chair across the floor. I cling to the mattress, trying to stay calm, but my glow gets brighter. It draws alarm from Agent Ward and fascination from Dr. Simmons.
"Do you know what causes your abilities?" she asks. I shake my head. "They're remarkable. I'd have to run some tests to be sure, but you're more stable than most pyrokinetics we've come across."
"Stable?" I try not to sound disbelieving. "I can't control my powers and I burn down buildings. I'm not sure I want to know what unstable is."
"I mean, relatively speaking, of course. But you recovered after losing control and that's frankly amazing." Dr. Simmons smiles at me, and I wonder a little if she'd trying to distract me from the turbulence, but she seems very genuine. Her comforting smile lasts all the way through the third bout of turbulence, but not through the fourth or fifth, which come immediately after. I shut my eyes to try to keep calm, and I don't open them until the room stops shaking for a full minute.
"Alright," Agent Ward says, "Come on, we've got to strap in. Everybody out." I follow Dr. Simmons out of the creepy, dark room, and into a calmly lit office looking room that is, in fact, on a plane. I'm led to a seat, and I buckle in, glancing over to where Agent Coulson and now Agent Ward are talking with a younger man whose mannerisms are eerily similar to Dr. Simmons. He comes over and sits by us.
"If we weren't in such a hurry, I could've recalibrated the suspension and the stabilizers," he grumbles. "It's not even a bad storm, I just haven't been able to fix them yet."
"It's not your fault, Fitz. We've been very busy." Simmons explains to me that one of the members of their team, Skye, was recently shot and recovering in the new medical pod somewhere else on the plane, which I realize must be bigger than I thought. Fitz adds that they're in a hurry because they were called to handle another emergency situation soon after picking me up. He doesn't explain much more than that, I guess I'm not exactly allowed to know classified information.
Fitz and Simmons start to talk about something else, and I stare out the window before I realize they're talking about me, and what I did in Seattle. How I burned down the building, hot enough to crack the concrete I was laying on. It would be distressing, except they're talking purely about the science side of it, not how I must be a freak for being able to destroy things. They ask questions about what else I can do with my powers, and for the first time, I don't feel uncomfortable answering them.
It isn't too much longer before we start to descend, landing somewhere in the desert, though I can't tell where we are just by glancing out the window. It looks like home though. Agent Coulson calls Fitz and Dr. Simmons over, except he says it like they're one person: Fitzsimmons. It's cute. They're joined by Agent Ward and a stern looking woman who walks over from the front of the plane. Probably the pilot. I smile at her. She doesn't smile back.
I stay put, not sure if I should go back to the creepy but probably fireproof looking room or wait for someone to tell me what to do. I try not to eavesdrop, but they're all standing right there, and nobody makes an effort to keep quiet. I don't quite understand what they're talking about, the scientists they reference are unfamiliar to me, and there seems to be tension about whatever they're finding. I catch that something similar has happened in New Mexico, Arizona, and Greenwich.
I also find out that we're on the California/Nevada border, and hear the word Asgardian again. Was that good? The team of trained government agents can't even seem to decide, throwing names like Thor and Loki around, trying to figure out if whoever comes will be ally or enemy. The only way to find out is to meet them, and I know that I won't be invited to that, even if I've become interested in the outcome.
Agent Coulson comes back over to me after they're done discussing it. "I apologize, as you can see, we're a little all over the place." He sits across from me. "Ally, I want you to understand that we're not arresting you, or holding you prisoner. Besides the men that you… disabled, no one got hurt in Seattle. We've since been able to identify those men, and almost all of them had warrants out for their arrest."
I feel relieved to know that, but I'm not sure what happens now. I don't ask though, because the point still stands that I burned down a building and my brain is a black hole and I don't think they'll let someone like that go back to living alone. Coulson continues.
"But because you're enhanced, we have to take certain precautions, especially because of the nature of your abilities. It's to keep you safe just as much as those around you. Dr. Simmons is going to take you downstairs and explain more, but we're going to put you on what's called the Index. It's a record of enhanced individuals that helps us keep track of who's out there and you'll be assigned a case agent to help keep you out of trouble."
"You guys are going to let me go back home?" That idea almost scares me more than anything else. Coulson's face changes to something unreadable.
"That's still undecided. There's a couple different options, but let me worry about that for now. Let Simmons know if you have any other questions." Coulson hands me off to Dr. Simmons and she leads me through the plane and down some stairs to an interesting looking science lab.
"The Indexing process is very simple, just some blood samples and fingerprinting, and some question. Mostly, I need to get a general understanding of your abilities to go on the record, and we're all set."
"Okay." I'm not going to object, it doesn't sound scary, and Simmons explains everything that she does. I learn a handful of things about myself, that despite my powers and as far as Simmons can figure, I'm still mostly human. That my normal temperature is about 107 degrees, and that she estimates it can go up or down a couple from that when I'm not using my powers. That I should be drinking more water than the average human. That I heal quite a bit faster than normal people. It helps me wrap my head around it a little more, that what I am can be broken down into somewhat explainable science terms.
I also meet Skye, the team's hacker, who uploads Simmons' findings into my newly created file and sends it to Coulson for approval, which she calls the most excitement she's had since getting shot twice in the stomach. Simmons looks at her disapprovingly. We end up back in the lab when the other agents return.
There a woman with them, decked out in full armor. I recognize her from the pictures Coulson showed me. More alarming is the fact that she seems to recognize me. Especially the part where she draws her sword and holds it against my neck. I yelp.
"I should strike you where you stand," she threatens, but hesitates. I start to go cross-eyed staring at the blade, but looking at the warrior at the other end makes my head spin. "You may wear the face of a friend, but I know who you are, Eldmara."
I freeze, like every cell of my body has been turned to ice. I know that name. I can't remember from where, but I know that I know that name. "Uhhh…." I'm surprised that I try to speak at all, with my bones like jelly and my heart pounding.
"Stand down, Lady Sif," Coulson says as he strides into the room. "I'm not sure what's going on here, but I would appreciate it if you didn't kill people on my plane." Sif looks at Coulson, alarmed, but pulls her sword down, though she doesn't put it away. I back away a little bit.
"Thor said you perished at the hand of Loki." Those names again. Except now I feel weird hearing them, like they're familiar too.
"Loki's not the only one with tricks up his sleeve." Coulson doesn't seem scared of Lady Sif, which is reassuring.
"Thor will be glad to hear it," Sif replies, before looking at me again, "but I regret to inform you that if she's here, you're all in terrible danger. She may claim to be Ally Pernix, but that is impossible. She's an imposter, a magical dupe."
"Excuse you?" It's already been a weird day, but this tops it. I always thought that when I was deeply terrified, I'd cry or freak out. Apparently today, I'm going with rude interruptions. "I might have a giant case of amnesia, but I'm me. I'm Ally Pernix."
"Amnesia? Likely story." Sif turns to Coulson. "The last time I saw Ally Pernix, alive, she sacrificed herself to save me from one of Asgard's greatest enemies. I believe that enemy is now using Ally's body and powers. I'm not sure how she ended up in your care-"
"We have no proof that Ally isn't who she says she is, and I doubt that one of Asgard's enemies would've spent almost a year going to high school and trying to keep out of trouble." I appreciate Coulson standing up for me, but Sif still looks unconvinced.
"I'm me," I repeat. "I'm sorry I don't remember you, but I'd really like to not get stabbed." Sif turns to me in surprise, a look of amusement on her face instead of anger. She studies me for a moment.
"You said that to me the first time we trained. I told you I couldn't make any promises." Sif seems to consider the idea. Next thing I know, she's put her sword away and is hugging me. "I thought you were dead."
"Yeah I'm alive. Might not be for much longer if you don't let me breathe." I had not realized how strong Asgardians were. Sif lets me go. "And I still have no idea who you are or what you're doing here."
"Let's come back to the problem at hand," Coulson redirects. "I understand you're looking for someone."
Sif explains about Lorelei, an enchantress. Someone so powerful she could bring down empires, and I detect a hint of fear in her. Sif details how Lorelei uses magic to bend the minds of men to her will. "Men have an inherent weakness we do not share." She smirks at me as she says it.
My mouth seems to move of its own accord and I'm speaking before I get to process what comes out. "Don't goad them, Sif, you know it's just the way that she's set the spell up. It's more potent if it's limited to one group of people, and she gets better at it over time that way." Everyone is staring at me, and I can feel my face get warmer as I clap both hands over my mouth. "I don't know where that came from," I mumble. "I don't remember, it just kind of came out." It had felt like a natural response to the topic, but I still can't remember. Sif looks hopeful and everyone is smiling, even though I'm still weirded out by that fact that whoever I was before, I knew things about magic.
Sif gets back to business, showing them the collar designed to stop Lorelei from using her powers. It sounds simple, but something tells me it will definitely not be. They make a plan to track her down, and the team disperses to their various tasks. I follow Sif and Coulson back upstairs, after making sure Dr. Simmons doesn't need me for anything else. Sif still freaks me out, but if she's the key to finding more about my past, I want to stay close.
I watch as they scan through recent crime reports in the area. They find several that could be linked to Lorelei, but I'm more intrigued at the friendly conversation Coulson strikes up about aliens. Like there are more of them. He specifically wants to know about blue ones, and if any have visited Earth. Only one of them is familiar sounding like Eldmara, or Loki, and that's the Kree. But Sif assures Coulson that none of them have visited earth. After tracking a location, Sif turns to me.
"Come, Ally," Sif commands, and I feel myself go alert in response. "Lorelei wouldn't dare to resist with the Eternal Flame on our side."
"What? With what? Is that why I can light things on fire?" My amnesia makes me feel like an idiot, and it seems to amuse Sif and concern Coulson, or maybe he's concerned about something else.
"I'm sorry, Lady Sif, but Ally's not going. I understand you two have a history, but she's under official SHIELD protection, which means not sending her into a potentially dangerous situation." I wonder if it's that simple, or if the fact that I'm being 'Indexed' has anything to do with it.
"Plus you know, if you want to ask me, I don't want to go. It sounds dangerous and a lot like you want me to light things on fire and I can't control my powers. I don't want to hurt anyone." Sif's expression changes surprisingly into one of concern.
"Ally…" She doesn't seem to know what to say. "You are a great warrior, one of Asgard's finest. But I do understand what losing control does to you. I won't force you to go, but we do need to get moving if we are going to stop Lorelei." They leave it at that. I follow them to the back of the plane, and Sif holds me back for a second while Coulson talks to the others.
"Stay alert. I do not know what Lorelei's plan is, but if we become overwhelmed, I'm not sure I'll be able to respect your wishes." Then she smirks at me and jumps over the railing. I decide to take the stairs.
Sif and Coulson depart, along with Agent Ward, and the pilot, Agent May. I'm left in the lab with Fitz, who's working on a gun, except it looks vaguely science-fictiony. "What's that?" I ask.
"It's called an ICER, it's a stun weapon," Fitz explains, launching into a description of how it works, first in very technical terms and then in English after I ask what dendrotoxin means.
"I wonder if it would work on you, your body temperature might be high enough to burn the dendrotoxin off before it takes effect. Let me ask Simmons." Fitz leans into the hallway that leads to the medical pod, and I assume that's where Simmons is, checking on Skye. "Is Ally's body temperature too high for the ICER to work?"
Simmons replies, barely audible to me. "Yes, Fitz, you'd have to adjust the dosage, even several rounds as they are right now wouldn't have much effect."
Fitz turns back to me, an excited look on his face. "Did you hear her? That's just fascinating."
"Yep, so I'm basically bulletproof, as far as these things go." It is pretty cool.
Fitz still looks excited, but now it's tinged with mischief too. "We could try it, if you wanted, just to see-" Simmons appears in the doorway, an exasperated look on her face.
"Fitz, please tell me I didn't hear you offer to shoot Ally with an ICER." I laugh.
"It was for scientific purposes!"
They go on to have a short debate about it, and I just listen in. It's a lot to take in, the government agency that deals with superheroes on a regular basis, and the sword lady that claims to be my friend, and the imminent threat of earth in danger. At the same time, it doesn't feel strange or out of place, just like it's a lot to handle at once.
Agent Coulson, Agent May, and Sif all look solemn returning; they relay that Agent Ward was caught by Lorelei and enthralled. The bad news continues when a furious Sif explains that the collar designed to catch Lorelei was damaged in the fight. There's no missing the desperation in her voice.
Coulson, on the other hand, is the picture of calm. He tells Sif that he'll worry about the particulars, finding Ward before it's too late and fixing the collar, which he hands off to Fitz. Sif doesn't look comforted by the idea, but she does calm down, or at least looks calmer as she stalks off to the room where I woke up.
I follow her there, not quite sure why, except that Sif seems to consider me a friend, and she looks like she could use one. I poke my head in. "Hey."
Sif glances over from the wall she looks like she was going to punch. "Ally," she greets, "Can I help you?" I just shrug.
"Thought you might want some company." I enter the room and lean against the wall. "I don't think it's really healthy to punch planes, and I was wondering if you could help me remember more. Do you know why I can't remember?"
"I have some idea. Last time I saw you, we were betrayed by a friend, Mina, a sorceress that helped you escape Eldmara, one of our enemies. Mina cast a spell on you, and I later learned that it's purpose was to erase your entire identity from your body so that Eldmara could take over and control your powers. You fought her off while I took your family to Asgard, but I had no way of knowing how successful the spell was. You remember nothing of your time as a warrior?"
"Nothing," I confirm. I feel strange being called that. "Was I really a warrior? And I could control the Everlasting Flame or whatever?"
"The Eternal Flame," Sif corrects. "And you are a fine warrior, master swordsman, and skilled combatant. You've waged dozens of battles and are almost always victorious." She pauses. "Had you been with us today, I have no doubt that we would have captured Lorelei."
"But I'm not a warrior," I protest. "Maybe I was, but I can't do all that stuff now, I mean, I can fight, but I wouldn't know what to do with a sword, and whatever this fire thing is I can't control it."
The Asgardian warrior smirks again, then pulls her sword out of sheath on her back. She shakes it, and it goes from having one blade to two. She pulls at the seam and it breaks into two swords, and she hands me one. Surprisingly, I don't drop it. "The weight's wrong." Another comment from my mouth that seems to have no source.
"You always say that, it's because you have not practiced, but," Sif swings her half of the weapon toward me, and I block it with my own like it's nothing. I stare at my hands, wrapped around the hilt of the weapon in a sure grip, and then at my feet, which have shifted into a defensive position. It's like what happens when I fight, instinct and training taking over even when I can't remember it. She swings at me a few more times, and dodges a slash I make.
Sif grins. "The warrior is still in there somewhere. Not all is lost." I smile back at her, I believe it, considering all the strange things I've seen in the past day. Sif takes the sword from me and reconnects it to hers. "You should get some rest. I do not know how long it will take this SHIELD to find Lorelei and her new prey, but I need you well rested."
I don't argue, just move back to the bed, but I don't lie down, just sit. "I'm still not sure I can go," I tell her. "Or should. I believe you, about all the sword stuff, just not about controlling my powers. Every time I use them, something bad happens."
"That is the nature of your powers, Ally. But you have incredible control over them, even when it seems that they're getting out of hand. You are in charge of your fire, but it is just like the sword. You are out of practice." I consider that, and Sif puts a hand on my shoulder. "I believe in you."
She believes in me a little less when I wake screaming and on fire from a nightmare several hours later. Even though they've found a location on Ward, both Sif and Coulson agree that bringing me is too risky. I stay on the plane while they head into Las Vegas.
I end up back in the lab after Dr. Simmons requests another blood sample. She explains that it's for some research that she's been working on, not related to the Index. I don't mind, the needles don't bother me and it's better to be down here with someone to talk to than back up in the dark room. I do wonder if that's where I should be anyway, after what happened this morning. But I don't want to miss the way Fitz and Dr. Simmons interact. They complete each other's sentences and hand the other tools that they need. Despite the fact that their fields of expertise are different, they are familiar with the other's work enough to be able to bounce ideas around. It's interesting to hear, even if most of it goes over my head.
Eventually, Simmons heads back to talk with Skye, and Fitz finishes up work on the collar. It amazes me what they do, that SHIELD isn't just a bunch of super secret agents running around fighting aliens and gods, that there's scientists and engineers working to understand the unexplainable and make the world safer.
I'm surprised to hear the loading doors of the cargo bay open. It's far too soon for anyone to come back, even if Ward and Lorelei weren't at the hotel. I move so I can see what's going on.
And I get shot in the chest.
I look at it, and even though I can tell something hit me and it's going to leave a mark, I am not dead. I realize as soon as I see Ward coming up, that's its an ICER, which doesn't affect me. And now I know that for certain.
"You don't look like much," says the woman behind him, who must be Lorelei, "for someone who holds the Eternal Flame. Still, a power like that… don't kill her, she might be useful."
"What are you doing here?" My voice sounds calmer than I feel.
"Taking down any resistance," Ward replies. I was hesitant about finding a fight, but I'm the only one on the plane who can hold them off. "Cooperate and we won't hurt you."
I know that's a lie. This probably doesn't end well for me either way, and I won't let them hurt Fitz, Simmons, or Skye if I can help it. I stand my ground, before deciding it might be better to attack. I don't want to hurt Ward if he's being mind controlled, but I know he won't hesitate to hurt me.
My first punch never lands, but his does. It's immediately clear that he has more training than those goons that I fought the other night, not to mention faster and stronger. Ward hits where it already hurts, but I do my best to ignore it. It takes every inch of instinct I have to intercept his blows, and I start to gain the upper hand, or so I think. I punch across his face, dodge a swipe, spin and kick him him in the ribs. For a moment, I can see myself as the warrior Sif believes me to be. The feeling doesn't last long.
He lunges at me, and we go down hard on the cargo bay floor. It knocks the air out of me, and my skin ignites. It stops Ward from attacking just long enough for me to get oxygen to my brain. I force my powers to shut off, even if it worked, I don't want to burn him.
He punches me in the face, clearly going for a knockout blow, but I cling to consciousness. I I'm barely able to register Ward shifting holds, but I soon feel the pressure on my throat. I grow hot again, out of my control, but it's not enough to get him to let go before I run out of oxygen completely. The world goes dark.
I'm in handcuffs when I wake up, in a room I don't recognize, an office of some sort. From the not quite steady movement though, I think it's still on the plane. I can hear Lorelei if I stick my ear to the door, her voice carries, I don't know if she'd just loud, or if it's the magic part. I have to get out there, see what's going on. I get my arms in front of me, with much finagling, then wonder if I can get out of the handcuffs.
After deciding that breaking my own wrist is not something I'm willing to do, I find a key in the top drawer of the desk, and free my hands. Now I just have to break down the door, but I try to just open it first, for good measure. It pays off, but I'm not prepared for the sight of May and Ward fighting. It's a fast fight, and I can't tell who's winning, but Ward's back is to me, and I run to tackle him before he can react.
We hit the floor and I fumble to grab an arm and twist it. It has to hurt, but Ward pushes against it anyway, and I can't hold him down. He gets a knee up and pushes me off of him. I scramble back and get to my feet. May closes in, and Ward doesn't seem bothered by that fact that he has to fight us both. May goes for his head at the same time I kick at his knee. He takes the kick so he can fend off May's punch. I get in close to hit his ribs and take an elbow to the face. May tries to take him down by climbing on top of him, but the effectiveness of that technique is thwarted when he rams her against the ceiling and throws her to the floor. I try to grab him from behind, intending to pin him against the wall, but he turns faster than I expect. Ward gets both of my arms behind me in a one handed grip before I can react, and the other hand holds something cold to my head.
I don't think it's an ICER.
We face May, and I would struggle if the angle didn't hurt my arms so bad. I'm mostly fighting to keep my powers under control, even now I can't bring myself to burn Ward. I wonder why he didn't just shoot me, but I guess that wasn't dramatic enough. He wants May to watch, know that she can't do anything about it. He pulls the trigger, and the gun clicks. It's a quiet sound, but it's everything. May holds up the thing with the bullets that she must have taken out of the gun.
While it's nice to not get my brains blown out, I don't doubt that Agent Ward knows more than a dozen ways to end my life without a gun. After a moment though, he lets go, backing up and putting his hands up. "Woah, hey, I'm sorry. It's me, I'm not-"
"He's clear," Sif says behind us, bring a cuffed and silenced Lorelei with her. May steps forward and clocks Ward in the face anyway, but Sif's attention shifts to me. "Ally?"
I'm breathing hard, failing at not freaking out because there's flames dancing up and down my arms and I can't get them to stop and I'm going to lose control like before and bring down the whole plane.
Sif hands Lorelei off to someone else and guides me back to the hexagon room. It's darker in here and I watch my own light cast erratic patterns on the walls. "Breathe, Ally."
"I can't get it to stop!" My voice is a frantic sound I barely recognize.
"It'll die out on it's own if you stop fighting it," Sif tells me, but there's doubt in her voice too. "Don't feed it, but don't fight it either."
I try, but all I can think about is all the people that are on the plane, people that were kind to me and didn't think I was a freak and how I'm going to hurt them if I can't get this to stop.
Sif mutters about she was never as good at this as he was, but I barely catch it, don't understand it. "Just breathe," she tells me. I try, in and out, but it doesn't stop me from getting worked up. The flames slowly envelop me, but I don't blow up at least. Sif stays with me, keeps a hand on my shoulder for as long as she can stand, but apparently even Asgardians have limits.
Eventually, I burn myself out. I can't tell if it's hours or minutes later, and I collapse against Sif, who lowers me to the floor. "Rest," she tells me, but it's unecessary. At this point, it's not like I have a choice to not pass out.
I wake cold and alone, in a small room with grey honeycomb walls, floor, and ceiling. It's eerie in here, and cold. I shiver. It's a long time since I've been cold. It seeps into my muscles, urging me to be still and quiet. I don't know why.
But I remember… what do I remember? The alley, fighting dark figures, and crashing through a window. But there's more after that, just bits and pieces. The agent, Coulson, and his team. Dr. Simmons fixing me up, though I've gained several more bruises and aches since then. I was Indexed. We were trying to find someone? I fought Agent Ward, remembered the feeling of the gun against my head. I don't remember what happened after.
But whatever happened after that was definitely not good, because I realize as I sit up that I'm wearing a new pair of the same kind of clothes: a black t-shirt and loose, black pants, both with some kind of insignia that I can't see in the dim light. There's also an IV in my arm, again. I don't touch it.
A door opens in the seamless wall and I scoot back to lean against the wall. Agent Coulson walks in, with a woman in armor that I swear that I've seen before. "How are you feeling?" she asks.
"Like I got beat up, thrown through a window, and beat up a couple more times," I tell her. "Sorry, I feel like we've met but I don't recognize you." I watch her and Agent Coulson's faces fall.
"Ally? This is Sif, she helped us catch Lorelei," Coulson says warily. "Remember?"
"No," I reply, my voice small. I tell him what I do remember, but it only makes their expressions grow darker. Coulson brings Dr. Simmons in to check me for a concussion. I don't have one. They fill me in on what I'm missing. I don't remember any of it.
I sit in the booth seats outside with a SHIELD logo water bottle and a protein bar while they discuss what it means. I think I know. It means that I won't ever be able to remember my past, because even when I get close, I'll just forget again.
But that's not what Coulson, Sif, and Simmons have been discussing. They're trying to figure out what to do with me. Sif explains that she can't take me back to Asgard, it wouldn't be safe for me there, because she doesn't want to leave me alone and she's almost always on missions for the king. I'm relieved to hear it, because the last thing I want to do is go to an alien planet when I already can't understand what's happening on this one.
Coulson explains, somewhat reluctantly, that the protocol for my situation, as an adult with unpredictable and destructive abilities, is to send me to a SHIELD facility called the Fridge. He doesn't comment on what that entails, which I think says more about what kind of place it is.
"But I'm uncomfortable with that option," he clarifies. "Ally, you risked your life today for my team, even though you knew you could get hurt. You refused to hurt a man that was trying to kill you because he was being mind controlled. You put the safety of those around you first." He sounds a little like a proud dad and it makes me feel better, if only slightly. "Those are things we value at SHIELD. There's a classified facility, usually for teenagers, that can help you fill in the gaps in your education, and they have specialists there that might be able to help you control your powers. I'm advocating for an exception in your behalf, and I think they'd be excited to have you."
It doesn't sound like I have much of a choice, but it's the best option I've heard so far. I nod. "That sounds good, I mean, it's obvious that I can't go home, but I'd rather do that then be locked up." Or end up stranded on an alien planet.
Sif says goodbye, she has to go back to Asgard, return Lorelei to prison. She tells me to be brave, reminds me that regardless of what happens, I am a warrior, and she gives me a hug. I return it, even though the woman is mostly a stranger. I try to hold onto that, make myself believe that she is right, that I am more than what I feel.
But by the time we arrive at the classified SHIELD facility, I have forgotten again.