Days went on and with them, the exhaustion, the cold and now the illness. Haruhi was weaker than us and she caught a fever. She couldn't walk anymore and I was carrying her on my back. I knew that keeping her in that cold in her condition could lead her to death and so, I asked to join the road again to find an Inn where she could sleep in a futon by a hibachi (fire basket). Mika told us that she could smell cooking and people a bit south from us and we followed her lead. If Koan's talent was his illusions, Mika's one was surely her smell. Nothing could go unnoticed for her, let it be an animal, a village or an imperialist patrol.
Haruhi's fever was getting worse with every step and I could sense her really hot against me. She was sweating a lot and sleeping most of the time even if being carried on my back wasn't the best position to sleep. Koan offered to carry her too but I didn't want to impose that on him. She was my daughter, I chose to take her with me and I would carry her. She was my responsibility.
We finally arrived at the village and we took two rooms, one for myself and Haruhi, one for Koan and Mika. The innkeeper hesitated to throw us out because of Haruhi. He didn't want illnesses to penetrate in his inn. I assured him that I would take care of her and that she wouldn't wander around. She wouldn't have the force anyway. I carried her upstairs and laid her in the futon, pulling the covers over her before lighting the hibachi. In no time, the room was warm and I came downstairs to get a bucket of water and clean clothes to put on her forehead and calm the fever. Her breath started to steady and she fell back asleep. I looked at her for a moment, remembering Chizuru's fever when I was with the guardians. I already thought before that Haruhi was my redemption, a way to make things right but now, I was even more sure that the Gods sent her to me for this reason. It seemed like events were repeating themselves but this time, I had control over them and I could find a better outcome. This child wouldn't be killed by the fever.
I went downstairs to join Koan and Mika with a drink. The sake was sweet and savory. It was warming me up in a very pleasant way. We had a few drinks together and ate a hot meal. I went back to see if Haruhi was up and if she wanted to eat but she was deeply asleep. I changed the towel on her forehead and got back downstairs. The innkeeper told me that he would keep the fire under the stew so I would just have to get a hot bowl for Haruhi when she would have an appetite. He really was a kind man and I thanked him genuinely.
In the middle of the night, Haruhi woke up with a scream, probably a nightmare, and I jumped out of my futon, katana in hand, ready. But there was nothing. I came closer to her and she looked at me with melting blue eyes, lit by the burning hibachi next to her.
« Where are we ? » she asked, panicked.
« Shh. » I reassured her « Don't fear, Haruhi. We're in an inn. You caught a fever. »
She started crying and I pulled her in my arms and passed my palm on her forehead. The fever was still strong.
« I'm sorry, Hajime... » she cried « We are losing time because of me... »
« Do not apologize over things you have no control on. » I told her calmly « What we are doing is hard, even for us adults. Your body isn't as strong as ours, it is only logical. »
« But Chizuru-neechan... »
« We are going to find her. We are not late, don't worry. We can rest a bit and wait for you to get better. »
As much as I wanted to be reunited with Chizuru, she was a prisoner of Kazama for three weeks now and I secretly hoped that two more days wouldn't make a big difference for her. But they could make a difference for Haruhi. I kept her in my arms until she fell back asleep and laid her back on the futon. She was only wearing a nagajuban, like me, since I took the opportunity to do a bit of laundry, so I pulled back the covers over her body and put some more wood in the hibachi. Nights were really cold and soon, we'll get back traveling in the forest. Could Haruhi really keep up with us ? I should have left her in Osaka...
I went back to my futon too but now that I had been woken up, my Rasetsu body wasn't willing to rest at night anymore. I turned on the futon, trying to find sleep and I finally gave up. I put on the blue wool kimono that I wore underneath the brown one and got away from the room. Having someone turning and sighing for hours next to her could disturb Haruhi's sleep and she needed all her energy to fight the fever. I got downstairs and went outside to get some air. It was really cold and I would rather have had my thick brown kimono but nevermind, I closed my eyes and let the winter wind cleanse my body and spirit to the bone.
« Tea ? »
I opened my eyes to see Mika sitting on a bench at my right. She was handing me a fuming cup of tea and I nodded before I came sitting next to her.
« You seem to really be a night owl. » she chuckled « even with the comfort of a futon, you still seem unable to sleep. »
I blew on my cup of tea. It was still a bit too hot for me to drink it but it was agreeably warming my hands. Mika seemed to be waiting for an answer but I didn't give any to her. I wasn't a fool enough to let her lead me on the subject of my Rasetsu nature.
« You like to be outside. » she eventually said.
« Ha. » I nodded, sipping the hot tea.
The contrast between the tea flowing inside my body and the sharp winter wind outside of it had always been a calming sensation to me.
« I like it too. » she smiled, reporting her silver gaze on the stars filled sky. « The night is always so beautiful. I think I'll never grow tired of looking at it. »
She was right. The night was indeed beautiful. I looked at the stars peacefully and little snowflakes started to fall. Mika extended her tongue playfully, like a little girl, to catch a snowflake and swallow it. It drew a small smile on my face. That wasn't really a behavior suitable for someone who was approaching eighty years old.
« What ? » she asked me with a smile.
« Nothing. » I answered, sipping my tea « You seem to be enjoying yourself. »
« I always do. » she chuckled « life's too short not to do what we want to do. Don't you agree ? »
I didn't answer. It was uncanny to have someone with her lifespan telling me that life was too short. If her life was too short, then mine was a heartbeat. She kept playing with the snowflakes, catching them with her hands or tongue and shaking her head to make them fall off her long ginger hair and I kept watching her peacefully. I couldn't sleep anyway. After a while, I looked at the stars once more and the snowflakes dancing in the wind.
Did you come back because Haruhi was in danger, Yuki ? Thank you for watching over her every time I fail to keep her safe. Are you mad I took her on such a trip ? You know her. She wouldn't have listened anyway. She's as stubborn and malicious as her mother. I'm taking care of your fox cub, mama fox, do not worry. She'll grow strong and free. She will get the power to make her own decisions and live the life she chooses for herself. That is an oath I make to you.