Orks Discovers Plorts

The smell of heavy gore stank to high heaven, or more accurately, within Gorggat's 'fishing shack'. The small green creature that called itself Gretchin was dissected and separated into pieces of managable flesh, each one sufficiently sized to be used as bait on a hook. Every piece of Gretchin was then put into a rusty, blood covered bucket, while the blood and bones would be grounded up to be used as chum. Gorggat chuckled as he picked up Gretchin's skinned face, holding it up like a nightmarish mockery of a fleshy, blood-dribbling sock puppet.

"Oi, Iz a little grot, dat's wot I iz! I like do'n grot fings, an mak'n Gorggat an Grashnik lives very un-orky! Hur hur hur~!" He then slammed Gretchin's face on the crimson table. "Well guess wot? Yer're not gonna be laugh'n anymoore be'n underwater, katch'n fish."

He sliced the face and added it to the bait bucket. It was then that the heavy door behind him had abruptly opened. Gorgatt looked behind himself to find a green giant he was all-too familiar with. However, this other green giant was unusually... wet. Like he had jumped into a body of water recently. However, Gorggat bared his teeth at the contemptible roommate. He still remembered that Grashnik stole his gitfinda.

Gorggat pointed accusingly at Grashnik. "Took ya long enough ta get back ere, ya git."

Grashnik shook his head and grumbled. "I didn't kome back ta da fish'n shack ta listen ta yer gob. Ma hunt'n trip went nowhere. I need ta get dry so I kan get back ta track'n dat kritta dat got away." He said, setting himself down at the central fireplace and stoking its fires with his spear. He then began removing his pelts and camouflage, setting them to the side to dry faster.

Gorggat snarled at Grashnik. "Wot?! Ya got ma gitfinda wet? Yer'e a zogg'n idiot, 'dat's wot ya iz!"

Grashnik snarled back. "You're 'da idiot ere! Wot kind uv ork from 'da deathskulls klan takes only wun gitfinda? Yer should have taken a lot more dan wun when we kame ta 'da WAAAGH! ta krump some bugs!"

Gorggat folded his bloody arms together. "That would have been nice, yeah. But see, 'dat waz before our krooza had enjin troubles an' stuff. Da freeboota kaptain dat waz pilot'n it decided ta make an emergency land'n on dis gork an mork forsaken planet. Don't know if it was 'cos we waz outta fuel or if 'e thought 'der were bugs on dis planet ta krump. But we krashed ere, an' now we iz separated from da rest uv da ork fleet head'n ta da Octarius party."

"I know 'da rest uv 'da story." Grashnik said as he bright his hands closer to the fire. "Da kaptain died when we landed."

"And now 'cos 'da kaptain up an died, a new ork boss got up ta take kontrol ova 'da remainin' tribes an klans 'dat got invited ta fight at Octarius." Gorggat added. "But bugga me if I knew wot Big Boss Bonebita was fink'n pair'n a Deathskulls ork wit' a Snakebites git."

Grashnik scoffed. "If it wasn't fer me, ya still wouldn't know how ta fish."

Gorggat shook his head, but then decided to change the subject. "Speak'n uv fings 'dat are wet, mind splain'n why yer look like yer slipped on a dousand puddles on 'da way ere?"

Grashnik sighed as he reached into his pelts. "As I said before, I was hunt'n some kritta. I found it near 'da woods, see? I followed it an' saw it ate dat snot ya threw ta 'da ground an' whoteva, before ya decided ta turn dat grot into fish bait."

Gorggat blinked his eyes dumbly. He remembered something. "Say, did yer see any 'umiez near da shack? I heard a squeaky voiced wun earlier, but I fink it gave me da slip."

"I didn't see any 'umiez." Grashnik answered. He pulled out three pink pulsating tetragonal trapezohedrons from his clothes. "But it made dese fings afta eat'n 'dat dead snot."

Gorggat looked at the pink objects presented to him. He carefully plucked one from Grashnik's hand and inspected one. He had no idea what it was. It was very shiny though. "What iz it?"

Grashnik shrugged, setting the pink objects to the ground and continuing to dry himself. "Don't know. It made wun uv dese fings afta eat'n 'da snot yer tossed. It karried it ta some kind uv nest it waz making, which waz where I found dese fings. 'Dat waz when I tracked it ta a nearby kave, see? It was also where I lost track uv it. Dere was an' underground lake, an' it floated on da wata like it waz filled wit' air or someth'n. Dat waz when it made its escape into da darkness, which was afta I found out ma gitfinda stopped work'n when it got wet."

"It's ma gitfinda, not yours ya bloody git." Gorggat said as he turned the pink object in the light. "Do yer fink it's an egg? Or iz dis its drops?"

Grashnik looked at the bloody bait bucket. "I would have had our grot eat wun uv im ta find out fer us. But since 'e's fish bait now, I guess we'll have ta find annuver grot ta eat it instead." However, he looked back at Gorggat with a mischievous smile. "Unless yer're wantin' ta eat wun uv im?"

Gorggat looked at the pink object in his hand for another inspection. Shrugging his shoulders and making a grunt of indifference, he tossed the pink object into his gob and gave it a mighty chew. Seconds after his teeth mashed the pink object to gritty chunks, he began coughing.

Grashnik raised an eyebrow at Gorggat. "Wot? Duz it taste sour or someth'n?"

Gorggat thumped his chest with his fist. "No! It's too sweet! An' maybe a bit chalky? Whateva it iz, it ain't its drops. I don't know if its an egg either! Wot made dis fing?!"

Grashnik chuckled at Gorggat's expense. He then held up his hand as though he carried some invisible thing in his palm. "The kritta 'dat made dose pink fings was very blobby, like if yer filled a bag wit' pink liquid stuff an' made 'da bag disappear. It was also about as pink as dat fing ya ate. 'Da blobby bugeye was small enough ta fit 'n 'da palm uv me hand, but was light enough ta float on wata."

"You fink dis fing iz a bugeye?" Gorggat asked, picking his teeth with a pinky talon.

"Of kourse! If it was a native kritter, we would be see'n more uv im around. Yer an' I have been on dis planet for, wot, a year now? See, if we had lived on dis planet for long enough, den we would have noticed more dan wun uv dese bugeyez dan jus 'da wun I discovered. On 'da otha hand, it was 'n 'da process uv mak'n a nest wit' dese fings." Grashnik explained.

Gorggat scratched his green head. "Urgh... So... Dese fings really are eggs den?"

"Dat's wot I'm finkin'." Grashnik nodded. "An' if dat bugeye ran around dropp'n more uv dese shiny egg fings, which might or might not be eggs mind ya, den 'der might be more dan wun uv dese blobby bugeye krittaz."

Gorggat nodded before going to a wall to fetch a large and blood-covered cutting tool, which also happened to be the same one he used on Gretchin. "How about I kome wit' ya on yer next hunt'n trip? I kinda want ta see wot dis blobby bugeye looks like up close. An' if it happens ta have friends... I'll introduce 'em ta ma choppa!"

Grashnik grinned. He checked on the gitfinda he kept 'borrowing' from Gorggat and discovered that it was dry. "The gitfinda iz dry. Alright den! No more muck'n about! Time ta track, trap, an' maybe eat some blobby bugeyez!"

A green fist slammed into Grashnik's face, forcing him from his seat and landing flat on the ground. The stunned Grashnik cocked his jaw back into place while Gorggat took the gitfinda back from Grashnik. "Anyway, danks for dry'n it. Been meanin' ta get dis back from ya."

Just as Gorggat got his gitfinda back in his possession, Grashnik bellowed loudly and threw his own fists at Gorggat.

And so, the two green giants proceeded to beat each other in a bloody brawl, arguing violently over who gets to use the gitfinda.

Prelude 5

Elated laughter filled the air as an investigator floated with glee and excitement.

Brent was hesitant to wear the Vacpack for a time. He always had a strong dislike for bees, due to an incident regarding a wasp nest he had ran into when he was a child. However, he practiced his jetpack and running skills with determination, his training taking more than several hours out of the day already. Operation of the Vacgun was exceedingly simple for Brent to understand, but the hovering capabilities of his Jetpack attachment took some time to understand how greatly it improved his mobility. As such, he spent much of his time with hopping between one scareslime to another. He even found a way to get on top of the ranch house and get on top of the stony walls that surrounded the area. After further practice, Brent felt confident that his training could enable him the means to travel the breadth of the land, and every inch that the Far, Far Range could offer him.

He exhaled as he landed at the front door of the house he and his investigation team was staying in. He decided that he had enough practice for the day.

But before he could get too comfortable, he saw three figures walking through the only passage that connected the Dry Reef Ranch to the rest of The Dry Reef. As they came closer to him, he waved his hand at them. All of them returned the wave.

Tiffany was the first to meet back with Brent. "Missed us? You looked like you ran a mile."

Brent shook his head. "Well. I think it'd be more accurate to say I 'floated' a mile. I have been practicing with my new Vacpack."

Tiffany beamed a smile. "Good! You'll need the practice for tomorrow."

Samantha and Robert arrived after Tiffany. Samantha shook her head. "For the past month, we've been scouring this stretch of planet for our missing person. Let's hope you're worth 7Zee's money and time."

"Speaking of tomorrow, and work," Brent said, pointing at the passage that Tiffany, Samantha and Robert had arrived from. "the investigation report said that Ms. LeBeau's last known position was at the Ancient Ruins. I would like to go there and investigate the area."

Samantha sighed as she looked upward in slight anguish. "Huh... Never thought we would go back in there again."

Brent blinked a few times. "Why's that?"

"The slimes are most aggressive at the Ancient Ruins." Robert huffed. It seems the Ancient Ruins was a sore subject for him. "It's not only Quantum Slimes and their qubit ghosts you have to worry about, but there have been sightings of other breeds of slimes haunting and infesting the area. We have made ten attempts trying to get through to the Ancient Ruins area, only for our progress to be completely halted by the slimes themselves. Last time we went there, an army of Feral Hunter Largos rushed at us from every direction. I was glad that I had a portable scareslime with us on that day. I don't think Viktor would like it if I told him I left one of his portable scareslimes there."

Tiffany nodded as she held her chin in thought. "Yeah, that was a scary day. Now that you mention it, it appears as though they are responding to our presence, adapting their strategies so they could more efficiently prevent us from entering their Ancient Ruins."

Samantha hand-waved at Tiffany's observation dismissively. "Pish-posh, as the British would say. I would instead postulate that the slimes' aggressive behavior has created and developed a primitive migratory instinct. This is surely just a side-effect of their aggression. Anything more than that would be fanatical conjecture. However, some people would refer to that as fanfiction."

Tiffany turned to Samantha. "Well sometimes it's fun to imagine scenarios that would have little or no impact to canon facts. However, most people don't call it 'fanatical conjecture'. They call a hypothesis. Even a witch like you would understand that a hypothesis is important to scientific progress."

"Don't flap your pouty lips at me." Samantha hissed. "Your cute facade might fool most people, but I know that a slimey girl like you can't keep a professional distance away from coworkers or slime specimens."

"Ladies." Robert grunted unenthusiastically. "Stop fighting."

Samantha and Tiffany simultaneously turned to look at Robert with venomous stares. Tiffany puffed her cheeks. "Rude. Didn't your mother tell you it's not polite to butt into a conversation?"

Samantha sneered at Robert. "I can handle Slime Girl by my own, thank you."

"You said it, Witch." Tiffany replied.

Robert looked at the the two before shaking his head. "Whatever. I'm just doing my job making sure we don't kill each other. That or get hunted by the slimes."

Brent raised an eyebrow. "Witch? Slime Girl? Would this entail you two shared some history at some point?"

Samantha turned to Brent. Her venomous stare had lessened a little. "You could say that. Tiffany and I used to study together when we were in college, though our studies branched off in different directions. We'd meet again under the employment of the 7Zee Corporation, and we would pass by each other when we gave our dissertations to the scientific communities."

Tiffany reached behind her head and blushed. "And when the 7Zee Corporation had need of researchers that have degrees in xenobiology and xenoarchaeology, well... Sam and I were their best people to send to the Far, Far Range."

"Ah, I see." Brent said, crossing his arms. "Would this history between you two get in the way of our investigation?"

Samantha shook her head. "No. We'll help you around the Far, Far Range as best as we are able to."

Tiffany pointed at Samantha and herself. "That was just some friendly jabs between old acquaintances. No need to concern yourself in the small diatribes between us."

Brent nodded at the geologist and slime specialist. "Good."

"Bad news, ladies and gentleman." Robert announced. "We got some guests."

Brent looked at Robert to see him pointing his Vacgun at a slowly approaching tide of slimes that were approaching the Dry Reef Ranch, looking as though they were a growing wave of multicolored balloons. He then saw Tiffany and Samantha readying themselves. Brent copied their stances. "Well. So much for an uneventful afternoon."

Tiffany gazed at the kaleidoscopic rainbow of marching slimes coming close, though they maintained a wide birth from the portable scareslimes. "Rocks. Tabbies. Raddies. Boomies. Honies. Crystals. And a whole bunch of pinks."

Samantha squinted at the crowd of gathered slimes. "I think I see some hunters in there. ... And also some quantum slimes too."

Brent felt a little uneasy. "So this is what you normally deal with?"

Robert chuckled at Brent. "Relax. The scareslimes are keeping them out of the ranch property. These little guys are too stupid to realize that those scareslimes are fake."

Samantha nodded. "And if they turned into any Tarr, our Super Hydro Turret defense system will wash them out."

Tiffany paused as she looked at all the gathered slimes. "... Wait. Something is odd. Do any of you see what I see?"

Brent turned to Tiffany. "What? What is it?"

Tiffany pointed at the horde of slime. "There are no largos here. This group of slimes are all pures."

Samantha turned to Tiffany in an unimpressed tone. "And that is supposed to mean what to us?"

"I don't know, but I think we're going to find out." Tiffany intoned.

Robert huffed. "Oh come on. Pure slimes are not that dangerous. They don't bite or buttstomp you."

Tiffany rolled her eyes. "You're forgetting about the rock, boom, rad, crystal, mosaic and fire slimes, Rob. Not every pure slime is harmless."

Once Brent was done focusing on his team, his attention lingered on the gathered slimes. They all seemed angry. More specifically, they were staring angrily at the four humans standing at the front door of the Dry Reef Ranch's habitation unit. He didn't like what he was seeing. "Robert. Do you think these slimes can organize themselves?"

"What?" Robert asked dumbly.

"Do you think these slimes have some kind of leader that is telling them what to do? Like there was a commander slime somewhere in that formation of slimes?" Brent said, trying to get Robert to understand what he meant.

Robert gave Brent a flat stare. "... The slimes? Really? Come on, Brent. These things are too stupid to follow military tactics." He then turned to gaze at the hundreds of angry faces that glared at him. That was when he saw something. "But then again. I have been wrong before."

Tiffany looked at Robert with a chuckle. "What? Did you guess someone's fortune cookie wrong?"

Brent pointed at the slime horde. "Look at the back of the formation."

Brent looked at what Robert had pointed at. His eyes widened in astonishment and in horror. A black wave of hungry maws was rising and falling far behind the formation of slimes. Cannibalistic gluttony was eating through the formation of hundreds of slimes like a torrential train wreck, becoming worse and worse as the destruction continued to unfold. The slimes at the furthest part of the formation were behind the roiling tide of insatiable gluttony, and were unable to escape. It dawned quickly on Brent that this formation was steadily decreasing in size, and the Tarr were converting the slimes to form their own formation. A formation that consisted of the same number of slimes as the first, but would certainly double in size. For every slime they consumed, the Tarr had added another to their ranks, which would transform into a monster that was double the size of its original self, or retain the same size if it had been a largo in a past life.

Tiffany paled. "Oh... Oh fiddlesticks..."

Brent gulped. "Do we have enough turrets to deal with this mess?"

Samantha gritted her teeth. "Eto piz`dets! Good thing I got this from Viktor yesterday." Samantha accessed her Vacpack and unpacked some strange device that she planted into the ground. Once she did so, it began spouting water. She pointed at the spout of water. "Portable water tap deployed! Suck some water up, but ration your water carefully! Stand next to a turret if you need to, but don't get overwhelmed!"

Robert chuckled darkly. "Looks like the war zone is coming to us. Heh! I never would have thought my training in the army is gonna come in handy like this!"

The four humans armed with slime ranching equipment quickly filled their Vacpacks with precious water and began to poise themselves at the doorstep of Beatrix's domicile.

The wave of Tarr rolled over the slimes that gathered to the passage that led in and out of the ranch property. It was hard to stomach watching the Tarr consume their kind, but Brent was beginning to understand what was going on here. A smart slime may have been at work here, and it must have figured that Tarr were not scared of other Tarr.

Once the Tarr finished consuming the pure slimes that filled the passage, they turned their gaze toward Brent's investigation team and to him. They proceeded to move as one in a wave of singular will. They were determined to eat the humans in Beatrix's old ranch.

Brent, Robert, Samantha and Tiffany started firing at the mass of Tarr. Their shots landed and splashed upon the mass of black and rainbow-skinned demons. With concentrated fire from both the Super Hydro Turrets and Brent's team, the Tarr was slowed in their advance. However, each member of Brent's team took turns to reload their Vacpacks with more water from the water tap, which ensured that the pressure applied to the Tarr didn't recede slightly. Each Tarr that became splashed with a dousing of water flashed in colorful vapor. Brent could have sworn that he saw sparkles and confetti lingered in the air before evaporating further.

Brent lost track of time as the Tarr kept coming towards Brent and his team. There had been a few times that he or his teammates would activate their pulse waves to push back the wall of Tarr. However, there were just so many, and Brent found that the energy his Vacpack uses requires energy for other functions. Not only did it use energy for sprinting or hovering through the air, but it also used energy when Brent had need of a pulse to force back the wave of Tarr. However, using pulse waves too much would eat into a Vacpack's energy supply much quickly than sprinting or hovering. It was just a resource in limited supply, just like the water being shot from his Vacgun. At least both energy and water were what prevented the Tarr from taking over Beatrix's ranch, but even Brent knew that their resources had limitations. Brent dreaded to think on what would happen if he ran out of one or both at the wrong moment.

Brent looked at the horde of Tarr that continued to pressure the defenders of the ranch. "And I thought the rancher life would be way calmer than this!"

Robert grinned as he fought against the oncoming Tarr. "Well it hasn't been a walk in the park lately. It's been like this for the past six months! Although, this wave of Tarr is a new one for me!"

"I have never seen so many before!" Tiffany shouted, sucking up water to refill her water tank before focusing on the Tarr again.

That was when Brent noticed a slight change to the Tarr. Some were able to survive a single shot of water at first, but then the rest of the Tarr were developing similarly. Brent gritted his teeth. "Guys, I just noticed something. Our water is becoming less effective. They're taking more hits to put down!"

Tiffany paled even more. "It must be because it's becoming night. Tarr get stronger when it's nighttime."

Robert hissed. "Should have set down more Hydro Turrets! I don't think we'll last another hour fighting them like this!"

Brent noticed that the Tar were getting closer to their position. "I really hope the Automated Rancher Recovery Robots find us before we get too chewed up!"

Samantha began stepping back. "Don't worry, our Vacpacks are registered! So long as we wear out Vacpacks when we get knocked out, we'll be delivered to Beatrix's habitation unit!"

Robert stepped back as well. "At least you got a coat of anti-adhesive on you! That'll stop any largo or Tarr from pulling you into their guts and turning you into food!"

Samantha hissed. "Getting gnawed on like some dog's chew toy is a thought I do not want to foster."

Tiffany paused before she began to smile. "Don't worry guys. We can get through this." She said, holstering her Vacgun.

Robert looked at Tiffany like she grew a third leg out of her forehead. "Tiff?! What are you doing?! We still got Tarr coming at us!"

Tiffany pointed at the Tarr. "We've been fighting the Tarr for an hour. Look."

Brent, Robert and Samantha looked at the Tarr and saw that they were bursting on their own. One by one, then ten by ten, and then hundreds of the Tarr was vanishing in vibrant explosions of rainbow colored steam and particles. The Super Hydro Turrets, now seeming too few in their installations and placements, were now fighting against the straggling Tarr that still hungered after Brent's team.

And now, the ranch was quiet with the silence of a growing night, the dusk of yesterday still painting the ranch with what little twilight remained.

Brent breathed a sigh of relief. "Hoo... Okay, my adrenaline is going down a notch. I feel really tired now."

Samantha stared at the passage with a critical eye. "... I was wondering why we weren't finding many slimes. They must have been following us when we toured through the range.

Robert coughed. "Blech. The air smells like an oil spill. I hope a good stiff wind blows all this bad air out of here."

Tiffany holstered her Vacpack and headed toward the Dry Reef Ranch's house. "I don't know about you guys, but I really want some food."

When she opened a door, yellow eyes greeted Tiffany. She shrieked loudly, backpedaling as fast as her feet could carry her. However, her hand had gotten caught in the slime's maw.

Robert was quick to act, using his Vacgun to suction-grip the largo and yank it from Jennifer's hand.

Brent had caught sight of the slime and saw that it was a Quantum Hunter Largo, before Robert launched it behind the house and sent it into the Slime Sea.

Tiffany cursed loudly as she cradled her hand. "That fat bastard bit me!"

Brent walked up to Tiffany. "Are you okay?"

Tiffany sighed. "I'll be fine. Just hurts a bunch." She held up her hand and saw that the largo that had bit her had drawn some blood.

Robert sighed. "At least the slimes are not poisonous. Except for the Rad Slimes. They can give you radiation poisoning." He said, holstering his Vacgun.

Tiffany looked up at Robert with an angry stare. "You pulled it too hard from my hand, Rob. You made my hand bleed."

Robert nodded. "Sorry about that. I can bandage it up if you want me to."

Tiffany paused for a couple seconds before settling on an answer. "Fine. I'm still mad at you though."

"How did the largo get in Beatrix's habitation unit?" Samantha was silent up until then.

Brent carefully looked inside of Beatrix's house. He found no signs of other slimes hiding inside. "... I don't see any more in here."

Tiffany pouted. "I guess the Quantum Hunter used his ghost to teleport into Beatrix's house when we weren't looking."

Robert groaned as he turned to Brent. "So about you mentioning leader slimes earlier. Have any other things you'd like to share with us that we should know?"

Brent nodded at Robert. "We should be more careful in the future."

"Hm." Robert responded in a respectful huff.

As Brent's team filed into Beatrix's house, they were unaware that they were silently being watched.

Watched by someone wearing an oversized trench coat and a fedora.

A/N: Action-filled preludes, baby!