The Green Tide Comes

Nobbytoof always considered himself to be an orky ork. In fact, he was so orky that the other orks had collectively decided he should be promoted to a nob. However, Nobbytooth had to do some serious roughhousing with the other orks to make them believe he should be their nob, but his brutality and cunning eventually paid off. Unfortunately for Nobbytoof, he was the smallest of the nobs that was under the command of Big Boss Bonebita.

Despite being a 'smaller-than-average' nob, a nob still had his pros and cons. One such pros: Having the ability to boss around his ork boys and gretchins.

Currently, Nobbytoof was commanding the boat's wheel, sailing through familiar waters in the early morning. His small army of greenskins were crewing a large fishing barge, decorated in jagged spikes that was painted red. The number of turrets that pointed out from its starboard and port side positions were numerous, and were comically large. These turrets were designed so that they could shoot at any direction, including straight down into the sea, as though its main focus was to shoot at a terrible sea behemoth, or fight an enemy submersible hiding right underneath them. Some turrets were even designed with harpoons built along their barrels, which would launch toward their target and impale them. The orks and gretchins that manned these turrets would sometimes forget to attach rope to the harpoons, but it would normally take only one or two properly tied harpoons to anchor their ship to their prey/enemy. The crow's nest was little more than a bucket that had a long pole skewered through its middle, which fitted a small gretchin within it. What a nonsensical design!

However, every ork and gretchin, worth their weight with their own teeth and green hide, grumbled and growled in annoyance. The hauls they carried back from their fishing trips normally held a plentiful bounty that fed everyone on their boat fifty times over. However, their nob boss had a 'bad gut feeling', as he called it. This gut feeling had swelled up in his belly so bad that he ordered his boys and grots to turn the fishing boat around. They were now heading back to the fishing shack with their barge only halfway full of fish.

Despite being a 'smaller-than-average' nob, being a nob is not without its headaches. One such cons: Getting his ork boys and gretchins to listen to him.

One such ork boy whined a gravely whine as he approached Nobbytoof, heaving a load of shoddy fishing rods. "I don't understand why we have ta go back, boss."

"Ya don't need ta understand, ya git. I jus got dis feeling, see? An' dis feel'n got me dink'n dat 'da Boyz we left back at our fish'n shack iz fight'n' without us. Dat's why we iz goin' back." Nobbytoof grunted derisively back at his boy.

The boy groaned. "Wot? Just because Grashnik an' Gorggat is havin' dere own fun? I say let em' ave' dere own fun! Dose two gits ain't worth 'da effort!"

Nobbytoof rolled his eyes. "If it were not for my ordaz kom'n from 'da big boss, I'd kick dose freeloadaz outta our group long ago. But now, we iz comin' back to check up on dem, and dat's final."

The disgruntled ork boy snarled at nothing in particular as he dropped his load of rods. "If Bonebita finds out we didn't kome back wit' a barge full uv squigsharks-"

Nobbytoof reached behind himself and grabbed the loudmouth ork boy by his neck and stared sternly at his eyes. "Listen ere ya stupid git. 'E's not gunna find out because I say 'e's not gunna find out. We'll go back ta fish'n 'n da sea before 'e or anyone else finds out, an' yer're gunna shut yer mouth about dis else yer're gonna start swimmin' back ta da fish'n shack. Understand?"

The ork boy struggled a bit before relaxing. "Alright! Alright boss! I'll keep ma mouth shut! I swears on Gork an' Mork!"

Nobbytoof released the ork boy. "Dat's a gud boy. Now pick up dose fish'n rods or Iz putt'n ya ta runtherd duty FOREVA!

The ork boy picked up the fishing rods and sulked away with haste. Hauling supplies was a job normally delegated to the gretchins, but many fishing trips often resulted in a loss of crew for the entire barge. There were plenty of big fish that hunted and preyed in the ocean, after all.

Nobbytoof glared at the retreating ork before he went back to steering the wheel again. He was adorned with a uniform that resembled something a pirate might wear. A blue greatcoat covers his green torso, yet splashes of old blood had stained it. An eye-patch covered one red eye, while his kaptin hat had the traditional ork-skull-and-crossbones emblazoned on the front. His hat also happened to have several fishing hooks pierced through the brim of his hat. His chopper was shaped like an overly large, yet poorly shaped, scimitar.

"LAND HO!" A gretchin shouted from the safety from his crow's nest, whom might have been the only gretchin on the entire boat that was smart enough to stay away from the water. He must have seen a lot of gretchins becoming fish food when they strayed too near the water's edge.

Nobbytoof grinned a toothy grin. "KAN YA SEE DA SHACK, GROT?!"

"SCANN'N FOR OUR FISH'N SHACK RIGHT NOW, NOBBYTOOF! UH... ... HUH? WOT?! NOBBYTOOF! I SEES OUR FISH'N SHACK, BUT IT'S ALL FLAT-LIKE!"

Nobbytoof didn't like that response. "WOT DO YER MEAN IT'S FLAT-LIKE?! DID GORGGAT AN' GRASHNIK FIND A SPARE TRUK SOMEWHERES AN' DROVE IT OVA OUR SHACK?! OH 'DAT ABOUT TEARS IT! I'Z KICK'N IM OUTTA MA KREW ONCE I GET BACK! I DON'T KARE IF BONEBITA CHEWS OUT MA EARS, BECAUSE ZHOSE TWO ZOG-BRAINED DIMWITS AVE PUSHED ME TO MAH LIMIT!"

"I SEES SOMETHINGS ELSE, BOSS! SOME SORT UV SHINY LOOK'N BITS ALL ALONG DA BEACHSIDE! SOME LOOK GLOWY!" The gretchin reported.

"WOT?" Nobbytoof didn't know what to make of the gretchin's report. However, the bad feeling he felt in his gut had been right all along. Or rather, he felt a disturbance through his connection to the mysteriously ambiguous anomaly that is unique to the orkoid race, otherwise known as the ork's psychic gestalt field. He felt that the two orks he left behind to look after the fishing shack was having fun. But then he felt that the two orks were no longer having fun, and would never have fun ever again.

Nobbytoof contemplated on what to do for some belated seconds before he shook his head and pointed an authoritative finger towards the shore. "ALRIGHT LADS, LISTEN UP! I FINK SOME FIGHT'N' WENT DOWN AT OUR FISH'N SHACK AN I WANT TA KNOW WHY! IF YA SEES GORGGAT AN GRASHNIK FIGHT'N' SOMETHING, HELP IM KRUMP WHATEVA DEY IZ FIGHT'N'! AFTA 'DA FIGHT IZ DONE, BR'N IM TA ME! I WANNA ASK EM SOME QUESTIONS!"

After Nobbytoof loudly barked his orders, the orks and few gretchins armed themselves with their choppas and shootas. Though they were surprised that they would come back to their home expecting a fight, but it was a welcome change compared to a boring fishing trip.

Once the fishing barge came to a stop at the dock, the orks lumbered off first and charged toward the fishing shack. Alas, it was as the gretchin in the crow's nest reported. It had been flattened. Upon closer inspection, the building looked more like it had been crushed by some unknown force. There were bite marks and strange scratches. But more prominent were the signs of battle that were scattered on and around the shack. Boulders were overturned, trees were pushed over, and scuffs in the dirt, grass and sand told the telltale signs that a fight happened here a long time ago.

Nobbytoof was the last ork off of the fishing barge, while a small band of gretchins that followed after him began to spread out in all directions. Nobbytoof followed his cadre of ork fighters to the flattened fishing shack and saw its damage. His face grew puzzled. "Wot 'n Gork an Mork happened ere?"

One of his ork boys scanned his immediate surroundings. "Dunno boss. Whateva fun happened ere happened a while ago. I see no bodies, but I sees skorch marks near da roof uv da shack. Might mean Gorggat an' Grashnik was attacked dur'n 'da night."

Nobbytoof looked at his subordinate snidely. "Is dat a fact?"

The ork looked up at Nobbytoof and shrugged his shoulders. "Uh... Not really a fact. Just a guess, boss."

"I don't need guessaz 'n ma krew, zog-fer-brains!" Nobbytoof shouted as he pushed the ork boy aside. "I need answaz."

A gretchen came up to Nobbytoof and held up something in his clawed hands. "Looks wot we founds, kaptain! It very shiny fing we found, yes!"

Nobbytoof looked at the object in the gretchin's hands. He was even more puzzled. He picked it up with his broad hands and inspected it. It seemed to pulse in his fingers. It was pink, and had a slightly sweet smell to it. Nobbytoof was even more confused. "Wot 'da zog are dese fings?"

"I dunno boss. 'Der's all kinds uv dese shiny fings all across da beach dough! Blue hard ones, bright little pale blue ones, stripey gray ones, an den 'der's dis supa shiny gold wun I found!" The gretchin said as it held out a golden object for Nobbytoof's perusal.

Nobbytoof eyed the object and he to held that in his other hand. He had no idea that it was a plort. Or, more specifically, a golden plort. His red eye glittered as the light from the plort sparkled. "Ooooh. Very pretty looking shiny bit." He quickly pocketed the plort and pointed at the gretchin. "I don't know wot dese are, but I want ya grots ta kollect dese wobbly bits. Komb 'da beach uv every last wun an' br'n im ere. Understand?"

"Yes boss, we understands!" One gretchin said, while the rest of its brothers nodded. They then began to spread out in all directions and busied themselves in collecting plorts by hand.

Nobbytoof then turned to his boys. "As for ya lot, ya start lookin' for Gorggat an Grashnik. Dey kouldn't have gone far."

His ork boys nodded as they too began to split off in their search for the two orks.

Nobbytoof grunted tiredly as he picked up the flattened roof of the shack and peered under it. He saw that there were no snotling bodies, save for a skeleton of a snotling that was in the fireplace. He didn't know what happened to the fishing shack that Gorggat and Grashnik was supposed to protect, but he suspect that something came and attacked not only the shack, but also the two orks that protected it. Whatever it was, it must have been a dangerous beast. Curiously, he saw no tracks along the ground, meaning that there were no heavy-footed beasts that stalked the area. There were no footprints either, which ruled out enemy soldiers. And even then, if a company of soldiers came through this area, then there would have been more signs of battle, such as bullet-fire, grenade craters, ammo casings, and lots of blood and corpses. So far, Nobbytoof saw nothing of the sort. This mystery was certainly a head-scratcher for the small nob.

Suddenly, something popped out of the ground.

Nobbytoof turned around and saw it. "... Wot?"

A pink slime gurgled and smiled blissfully.

And then, suddenly, more slimes started popping out of the ground.

The few orks and fewer gretchins still in the area with Nobbytoof were visited by the sudden spawning of slimes.

And they looked completely harmless.

A gretchin looked at one of them and cocked his head. "... Did we get ambushed by some tiny bug-eyed wobblies?"

Nobbytoof scrutinized one of the slimes for a few seconds before growling. "Dese fings ain't tough lookin'. No way dey are da ones dat flattened our fishin' shack." Nobbytoof then looked around carefully. "But wot DID flatten our shack anyway?"

Within the winding tunnels of the under-passage, four slimes embarked on a familiar journey. They slid past landmarks that were familiar to them, slipping past countless rocks and boulders that looked the same, and scooted over various inclines and slopes of rocky stone. They were currently engrossed in a heated discussion.

"What?! Come on, he would SO totally floor Moldy-Butt!" Tiffany exclaimed.

"Palpatine is not only the Emperor, but he's also THE sith lord, a powerful master of the dark side of the force. He would use the force to pull Voldemort's wand from his hands and stop him from casting spells." Samantha hissed.

Brent sighed. "Okay, but in the Harry Potter books, the more powerful wizards were able to practice and reliably cast wandless magic and nonverbal spells. So even without a wand, Voldemort would still be a powerful enemy that Lil' Ol' Palpy would have trouble with. And even if we were to ignore the horcruxes making Voldemort immortal, a sufficiently sized bottomless shaft to throw Palpy into would flat out end the stalemate."

"Please kill me." Robert groaned under his breath. "Kill me and let me bear witness to this nerd-talk no longer."

Tiffany scoffed. "Oh come on, you didn't state Palpatine could only be taken out by an environmental hazard. We're pitting them against each other with only their weapons, armor, and skills. You know, to find out who would win in a death battle!"

Samantha smiled a sigh. "Palpatine would have a bigger advantage over Voldemort anyway. He sorta uses wandless magic and nonverbal spells in a way."

Brent shook his head and groaned. "But Voldemort has the ups, man! Don't you two forget that he can fly? Wizards and witches have access to their broomsticks, while Voldemort can use his unsupported flight ability by becoming smoke. Palpy has no counter for that!"

Robert decided to stop the conversation. "Alright chuckle-heads, it's time to shut up now! We're on the other side of the mountain."

Tiffany beamed a smile. "Oh what joy! I can't wait to go outside again!"

Samantha hissed. "Tiff, no. I can see light at the end of the tunnel. Daylight evaporates phosphor slimes, remember?"

Tiffany pouted. "... Oh poop. And I really wanted to eat something too."

Samantha sighed. "I'll be sure to find something for you."

Tiffany bumped into Samantha's side playfully. "Thaaanks~!"

"Don't think we're done talking about our versus discussion, Tiff!" Brent exclaimed before moving toward the cave entrance.

"In your dreams, you Harry Potter fanboy! Go be a muggle outside!" Tiffany teased.

"Have fun being in the dark side. Too bad it has no cookies!" Brent teased back.

"Don't talk about cookies, you dork! I'm hungry!" Tiffany whined.

Brent chuckled, but he was saddened as he continued on without Tiffany. Leaving Tiffany in the cave stung him a little. He didn't want to leave her alone, but she also needed food. Once Brent followed Robert and Samantha outside, he decided to voice his opinion. "I hope we can find some food for Tiff soon. It feels like it's been a while since we've been outside."

Robert shrugged. "I remember that last time we were here, you scared our pants off."

"But we weren't wearing pants at the time." Samantha added.

Robert rolled his eyes. "Yeah, well, I didn't ask you. Let's just hope we don't run into... any... more... orks?"

Brent and Samantha noticed Robert was trailing his sentences. When they turned to see what Robert was looking at, their expressions became that of surprise. They could hardly believe it, but they are seeing it for themselves.

Slimes.

Slimes everywhere.

But not just the average variety of slimes that are usually the pink, rock, tabby, or phosphor breeds. (Even when the phosphor slimes never come out during the day.)

Brent could see a pink honey slime lingering in a patch of flowers, which would snap up any insects that were attracted to its sweet scent. Yellow almond-shaped eyes were seen peering behind a tree trunk as it stalked a beaked mouse. A small explosion rocked the land as a boom slime blew the bark off of a tree after it was startled by a chopper bird pouncing onto it. An aura of green brightened the land as a rad slime was chased by some giant, spiny, horned bull-lizard. Fortunately for the rad slime, the giant bull-lizard became too weakened to chase after lingering too long in the radioactive aura produced by the slime.

And then there was the gold slime that was idling in the middle of a small meadow, with little care in the world.

Brent, Samantha, and Robert were surprised that more slime breeds were appearing on this world.

But this also meant bad news for Brent and company. "... How did these guys get here?" Brent asked incredulously.

Robert shook his head. "No idea, but this means if any of these slime largos eat a plort they don't produce, we'll have a Tarr outbreak on our hands. Right Brent?" Robert said, turning to Brent.

Brent nodded grimly. "Yeah. It happened as I left the beach after the largos ate those orks and snotlings. Should we warn Tiff?"

Robert sighed. "I'll inform her." He said, turning around and heading back to the cave.

Samantha stared at the various slimes that prolifically populated this once hidden area. She sighed. "So... What? Does this mean they spread by spores, or..."

Brent shook his head. "Does that bet even matter to us right now?"

Samantha huffed as she stared at the bull-lizard, which begun to chase after the rad slime again after it had its breather. "... I guess not? I dunno. But... this still leaves me with a lot of questions. How did these other slimes get here?"

"I guess we'll just have to assume these guys came here through the portal we made, or that something happened here after we left." Brent said.

"Oh wow! So there ARE slimes here too!"

Brent and Samantha turned to see Tiffany behind them. Brent's mouth gaped in horror. "Uh?! Tiffany?! Your in the sun!"

Tiffany nodded at Brent. "I know, I know! I just wanted to see these other slimes for myself real quick."

"Aren't you worried that you'll die in the sunlight?!" Brent exclaimed.

Tiffany smiled reassuringly at Brent. "Oh don't worry yourself over me. I can stay out in daylight for thirty minutes. I'll come back to the cave after ten minutes. Okay?"

Brent paused for a few seconds before shaking his head. "Make it five and I'll agree that Palpatine is stronger than Voldemort."

Tiffany blinked a few times before she smiled broadly at Brent. "Daaaaw, you care about me~!"

Samantha gave Tiffany a deadpanned stare. "Tiff. Go back to the cave. We'll get you some food."

Tiffany's expression became hurt when she turned to Samantha. "... But... Saaaaaam! I wanna talk to you guys! About the sliiiiiiiiiimes!"

Samantha shook her head and stared at Tiffany. "Tiff. Go back to the cave. What would happen if there was a Tarr outbreak? You'd be safer in there."

Tiffany pouted. "... Fine. You better get me something extra juicy." She said before turning around and heading back to the cave. Robert was seen coming up over a hill hurriedly following after Tiffany, only to meet up with her again as she was returning.

Brent sighed. "Sam? Do you think I can help you out with collecting food for Tiff?"

Samantha turned to Brent, huffed, and nodded. "Sure, but I'm pretty certain it'll be slim pickings out here."

"Which is why I want to help. The less hungry Tiff is, the less trouble she'll get into. At least I hope that's the case."

Samantha nodded with a smile. "A sound reason. Think you can keep up with a pink tabby largo?" Samantha said as she began to lead the way.

Brent nodded as he followed. "I'll try."

And so, Brent and Tiffany braved the brushland, staying far from any largos and passing by many harmless purebred slimes. The many slimes they encountered were without any human intelligence, and were either only interested in eating food or... anything else that seemed entertaining for their simple minds. But alas, Brent and Sam trundled on as they searched for any fruit that would sate Tiffany's hunger. Although, since Tiffany was now a pink phosphor largo, any kind of food could be gathered to feed her, now that Brent thought about it. Regardless, they proceeded forward with this one objective in mind.

Little did they know, they were being watched.

A/N: Sorry for the long wait. I blame my writer's block.