In which Hervey the Furious, pirate extraordinaire, makes his grand debut.
The contents of this chapter are based on a post and comments from April 3rd, 2005.
Dedicated to Julie, for taking a lesser-developed character and giving him a life of his own.
At first he thought it was the liquor, but then he remembered he hadn't even started drinking yet for the day. After seeing two lizards and a duck walk in front of him, clothed and upright, Hervey decided he was sober, just somewhere really strange.
"Man, that's the last time someone dares me to hit on a girl near a pepper shaker," he sat cross-legged in front of the nearest body of water and grumbled. "Where the hell is the ocean, dammit?"
He closed his eyes. The last moment he could recall replayed in his mind. The gentle rocking motion of the Dauntless at sea, the clattering of plates and tankards, the rough wooden surface of the stools scattered across the dining area…
She was cute from behind. Then again, they often were cute from behind. And when she spun around in her seat, she was cute from the front as well. A complete 360 degree win-win.
Dario caught him staring and nudged him in the ribs. "Heh. Appreciating the view, Hervey?"
"Nah. Well… yeah, but… nah."
"Don't nah me. A pirate can't be too picky on the high seas, after all."
"Yeah, yeah," Hervey took one last, long look before resting his cheek against his palm with a shrug. "Maybe you can't be too picky, but I have standards. It helps being conventionally attractive, of course," he shot his comrade a sidelong glance and snickered. Dario was portly, balding underneath his cap, and he had a voice like a waterlogged Damp Hairball, so pickings for him were understandably on the scant side. Sometimes it was hard to believe he managed to father a kid in spite of it all.
"Right, right. A regular Adonis, you are. We all know."
"Even if I didn't have youth on my side, my charm and dashingly good looks are more than enough."
"Your humility is astounding," Dario said with a snort before peering over his mug, sizing up the cutie opposite them. She was sprinkling her dish with some seasoning and humming to herself. Her face looked vaguely familiar to Hervey. There were over one hundred people on board, so it was difficult to place every single one, but for some reason this girl was setting off alarm bells in his head.
"Nah," Hervey said again.
A surreptitious smirk spread across Dario's face. He stroked his goatee, lowering his voice as if preparing to divulge a juicy secret. "Tell you what," he said, "since you're so damn charming, I've got a deal for you. How'd you like me to pay off all your gambling debts? Rumor has it you blew your recent stipend on Ritapon, of all things."
"W-who told you that!?"
"Doesn't matter. Do you want it or not? One-time offer."
"Hell yeah! Who would say no to that?! But… what's the catch?"
Dario raised a bushy eyebrow in the direction of the girl. "Make a pass. Show off some of that 'Hervey the Furious' charm. Let's see it in action."
It sounded easy. Too easy. But recouping his losses at Ritapon was definitely more difficult. Despite the offer setting off alarm bells, Hervey was quick to make the decision.
"Lookin' to see the master at work, eh, Dario? Guess I'll do you a favor, since you're offering to do one for me."
Dario grunted again and slurped from his tankard without giving an answer.
Hervey slid off his stool in a single, smooth motion, strolling over with radiant confidence. The cutie was still seasoning her food, oblivious to his approach. He rifled through his mental list of pickup lines before settling on the perfect one. A true classic, with a dash of humor. Dario seemed like a man who would appreciate the classics.
"Looks like you're trying to 'spice' things up. Need a hand?"
They locked eyes. She was definitely familiar, and his alarms were definitely louder than before. She tilted her head and continued shaking pepper across her meal. "Huh?"
"Spice… you know, seasoning?"
Damn, that was a smooth line. Don't tell me it was wasted!
"Ohhhh. No, I don't need any help!" she smiled, and the cap to the bottle popped off, dumping a pile of spice across her food. She looked down with a disappointed frown.
"Gah, sorry about that, miss—"
"Oh no, it's—ah—" she froze in place, face scrunched, eyes shut, and now he knew exactly why she looked so familiar.
Shit. SHIT.
There was a loud pop, and then—
Hervey rubbed his backside with a groan. The grass underneath him was soft and definitely solid land instead of the rolling ocean waves lapping against the hull of the Dauntless. He knew he should've listened to his gut instinct, but it was too late for remorse.
DAMMIT. That was Viki, wasn't it?! Dario, that bastard… he knew, didn't he?! Wait until Lady Kika hears about this...
A soft voice interrupted his thoughts. "Umm... Hello? Sir?"
A young woman stood in front of him, her head curiously tilted to the side. The style of her clothes were unfamiliar, but her expression was kind.
And most importantly, she was cute. Cute, and not Viki.
"My name's Yun, a shaman of Alma Kinan. Welcome to Budehuc Castle," she giggled. "I was out walking and you suddenly…" she motioned to the grassy lakeshore, "blinked right in front of me. I assume you were teleported?"
He staggered to his feet and rumpled his hair. Hopefully the gesture looked cool and composed because he was still freaking out inside. "Hey. 'Sup."
She giggled again. "Where are you from? Or… should I ask when?"
"Just a little place called the Island Nations, I'm sure you've heard of it."
"The Island Nations?" Yun clasped her hands together. "Oh! I've heard a few residents are from there! Sir Cray, Sir Travis, Lady Elenor—"
"Travis?! No way. He's here? Damn him and his little tricks, making me walk through that maze twice…" he grumbled, then quickly regained his chill. "But... at least I know where I am now. Sort of. Thanks, pretty miss. My name's Hervey, and I'm a pirate. Have no fear, I won't steal anything," he winked, "except maybe your heart, heh."
Something about Yun's list of names set off a new round of alarm bells in Hervey's head.
Wait, did she mention Cray? Like… the same Graham Cray with that crazy tree? I thought we finished him off...
The shaman smiled. Damn, she was cute. There would be time for asking about former antagonists later.
"I hope you'll enjoy yourself here if you're going to stay long," she said. "If you need help with anything, I'll be glad to assist."
"Oh yeah? Maybe you can hit me up sometime, we can grab some dinner and have a long talk all about the Island Nations."
"Really? I would love to hear more about them and your time."
"Absolutely. Whatever you want to know—wait, what do you mean by 'my time'?"
"Well, based on what I've gathered from the others, you're about… 170 years in the future," she said.
"The… future?" Suddenly he felt seasick. Standing on land, but surely seasick. Where was the nearest tavern?
She bowed. Was this a speech she gave often? How many time travelers was this chick fielding on a regular basis to be so casual about the topic? "You'll have to forgive me for all the questions, Sir Hervey," Yun apologized, "I'm from a clan that doesn't study much worldly history, so I'm quite curious to learn more about the outside world."
"Worldly? I can do worldly," he said. Flirting felt way better than thinking about time travel. "Let's see… Nay-Kobolds have their own village, there are pretty mermaids everywhere, and I can tell you that on a deserted island, couples romance under the starry sky while the mermaids sing," Hervey sauntered around Yun in a circle, relishing in the childlike wonder shining in her eyes. "I don't really know much about history. I'm a pirate. We don't do that kind of stuff. Elenor should probably know a hell of a lot more."
"Mermaids exist? What do they look like? You said that they could sing, how beautiful are their songs? What are their opinions on humans?" She stopped herself and blushed. "Oh, I'm sorry. My clan is a secluded village deep within a forest, so I can only imagine what this all must be like. Not like that's a bad thing, since I love listening to the spirits' voices in the trees," she said, "But I have dreamed of seeing the ocean…"
"Slow down, slow down. Yes, mermaids exist. They can actually walk as well, but they have fins for swimming," Hervey began to list off his fingers, "They're beautiful. They don't like humans much, since a lot of people kill them for their hides. Like animals, I guess. But they're really something."
"Ah! I see. Just like those from Duck Village, or the lizard clan within Great Hollow."
Judging by Yun's studious nod, it was likely she was telling the truth. At least now he knew it wasn't a drunken hallucination, which meant Yun was the real deal as well. He grinned to himself at the thought.
"Are you personally acquainted with any mermaids, Sir Hervey? How incredible!"
"Heh, if you keep asking me all these questions, I won't have any conversation fodder left for dinner."
"Ah, I'm sorry," she bowed again. "It's just so fascinating to hear about the outside world!"
"I'm more curious about this world," Hervey said. Sure, it was pretty, but it wasn't the ocean. Although, if all the chicks at this Budehuc were as cute as Yun, it couldn't be half bad.
"Normally I'd offer to take you on a tour, but unfortunately… well, it's rather hectic here right now," she admitted and twisted a loose strand of hair between her fingers. "The former castle master, Thomas, he… well, he's going through a bit of a trying time right now and has stepped down."
"A masterless castle, huh?" Normally that would sound like a great invitation for any pirate worth his salt, but the distress on her face kind of put a damper on any hopeful looting.
"Miss Yun!"
A youthful voice carried across the grounds, accompanied by spirited clanking and the sound of barking dogs.
"Everything has been finalized for Luca's release! Did you want—oh!" A smaller girl half-clad in armor halted in front of them, her spear held upright as if awaiting an order. A noisy pack of dogs scampered at her feet. "Who is this?"
"Cecile! Your timing is perfect," Yun said. "This is Sir Hervey, he's a pirate from the Island Nations."
"Island Nations?" the girl furrowed her brow. She seemed a bit slower on the uptake than Yun. After a moment's pause, she gave Hervey a wary stare. "A good pirate, I certainly hope."
"I'm certain he is," Yun said. "I have a few errands to run, but I'll take care of Luca in a little bit. Why don't you show Sir Hervey around the castle grounds? He's a new arrival."
Wait, no. Don't leave me with the little kid!
"Heh," Hervey tugged at his scarf. "If you need help with your errands, I'm your man."
"That won't be necessary, Sir Hervey," Yun smiled. "But I would love to take you up on that offer for dinner and hear more about the Island Nations. I look forward to seeing you later."
Score. Even in the future, I've still got it.
"Welcome to Budehuc Castle, Sir Hervey!" the armored girl saluted, the feather in her helmet comically flopping along. "I'm Cecile, the commander of the guards!"
"H-hey there, little girl," he half-waved, watching Yun's retreating form as she walked away.
"Little?! I am not little! I'm turning 18 this year, and I'm the same age as Miss Yun!"
"What? No way."
The stink-eye was back. "I thought Miss Yun said you were a good pirate!"
"I-I am!" Hervey decided in the moment that despite her insistence, she was still totally off-limits, age notwithstanding. "Do I look like a bad pirate to you?"
She scrunched up her nose and scanned him over. "Well… I mean… I'm not really sure what a bad one would look like. Dirtier? Smellier?"
"Yeah, let's go with that. I'm clean as a whistle, see?"
The answer seemed to agree with her judging by her emphatic nod. He wasn't about to push his luck. "I suppose you're right! Well then, let me give you a tour! Do you like dogs?" she asked.
"Dogs? Yeah, I used to have one, but he didn't do too well on boats."
"We have lots of dogs here!" The dogs scampering at her heels wagged their tails as if on cue. "I'll introduce you to all of them!"
He studied the pack. Each dog wore a different colored scarf and was undeniably adorable. "I wonder if I can find a dog and give him a scarf exactly like mine… Then I'll name him Little Hervey," he chuckled to himself. Dario used to talk about wanting a dog. He liked the thought of having a leg-up. Sure, it wasn't payback for getting sneezed away, but Hervey knew he wasn't exactly in the position to be choosy.
"What a nice idea!"
"So long as he's not seasick, then I'd be all set. He's gotta be a real seafaring pup."
"Seafaring? Like on a boat?"
"Uh, yeah. I'm a pirate. Boats are kind of important."
Cecile glanced over her shoulder at the brick manor over the hill. "If you're looking for a place to stay, I suppose we could set you up somewhere in one of the rooms on the boat—with Master Thomas leaving, I'm trying to help all the newer arrivals settle down," she added, her voice wavering.
"Wait, you have a boat here? A proper boat? But this is a lake."
"Most of the rear structure of Budehuc is composed of a boat that crashed ashore and couldn't be moved. It's actually really nice, especially up on the deck because you can see everywhere!"
"Heh. Sounds like fun. Sign me up, kid."
"I told you, I'm not a kid!"
"Sure, sure. You got it, captain."
It wasn't the ocean, but if he was going to be landbound, things could be worse. And after all the excitement, he still got exactly what he wanted in the end—a hopeful date with a cute girl.