SG1: Myrddin's Shield
Chapter One
Vala Mal Doran was dreaming: the luminous event horizon that nestled inside the Stargate deposited her and the rest of SG-1 on the surface of a planet covered with a layer of winter snow. The three men and two women, who made up the Stargate project's flagship team, pulled their collars up higher against the biting wind and fanned out to reconnoitre the area.
Several hundred yards away from the Stargate, the edge of a coniferous forest began and the outermost dark green trees were covered with a light dusting of powdery flakes. High above in the purpling sky, twin moons peered down at them: one silver and one green, reminding each member of the team that they were on an alien world.
By mutual agreement, they headed south towards the trees: this was the way that the MALP's telemetry had indicated would lead to a settlement of some kind. It had picked up human life-signs on its earlier scan of the local area. SG-1 walked expectantly, eager to make contact once again with as yet unknown civilisation and one that they all hoped would be friendly.
Under the cover of the forest canopy, the snow diminished and further in the forest floor was carpeted with pine needles softening the sound of their boots as they walked. After a few minutes, the trees began to thin and the snow became thick once again.
Ahead they could see the soft, warm lights of the settlement. A mixture of thatched and tiled roofs could be seen just above the rim of the outer wall, which protected the village. The wall was made of grey mottled stone and the entrance was marked by an impressive archway, inscribed with curious symbols that Vala didn't recognise. The team walked onwards unchallenged and Vala led the way along the snow covered dirt tracks that wound through the mixture of single-storey wattle and daub cottages, two-storey wooden houses and grander stone houses that made up the settlement.
There was no-one moving about in the streets but sounds of voices and music came from a large wooden building which was standing right in the centre of the village. SG-1 headed towards this building and Sam and Daniel cautiously pushed open the huge doors while Teal'c hung back, waiting to see if his skills as a warrior would be required.
Vala and Cameron walked through the doors and looked around at the people of the village as they sat; laughing and talking, sharing wooden platters of meats, vegetables and fruit with each other while some musicians played a quiet melody on stringed instruments. For a moment, no-one noticed their presence then gradually silence descended as people turned to stare.
Cameron broke the silence first. "Hi there folks. We mean no harm to you. We're explorers and would like to get to know you better."
A tall, thin woman with silver blonde hair hesitantly stepped forward and bowed. Then a dark-haired man appeared on the scene. He looked at each of the visitors in turn and then returned his gaze to Vala, beckoning her forward. She followed him and they came to a bed where a little girl lay unmoving. Somehow Vala knew the child was very ill and that she must do her best to help heal her.
Suddenly the dream shifted and Vala found that she was now in a very dark underground cavern; the only light came from the shining glacial floor under her feet. She could see Cameron and Sam ahead of her making their way across a frozen archway spanning a deep crevasse.
Vala shivered and gripped her weapon more tightly as she was assaulted by some instinctive sense of danger. With each step she took, a sense of foreboding started to build up deep down in her very core. She peered into the darkness but could see no end to the ice flow on which she walked. Suddenly her feet slipped and she found herself sliding towards the edge of the crevasse. Fear clutched at her heart, making it hard to breathe. Then someone grabbed her from behind, pulling her back to the relative safety of the centre of the ice.
Without warning, there was another shift in the dream and she found herself in a huge underground chamber and again her sense of danger kicked in: Vala began to fear that some terrible tragedy was awaiting one of the SG-1 team. This impression began to grow, gaining strength as she walked in the direction the dream was taking her. Her heart pounded in her ears as she stepped cautiously across a patterned floor in the long dimly lit cavern. Daniel was at the front of the team, telling everyone where to step as he read the writing on the stones set into the ground of the chamber.
Anxiously she looked down to see where she was placing her feet and lifted her eyes just in time to see Daniel disappear from view. There was an agonised shout as he fell into the trap waiting for those foolish enough to dare crossing the tiled floor and then there was silence.
Cameron, Sam and Teal'c shouted out Daniel's name but in the dream Vala knew there would be no reply and that Daniel, her best friend and the man she had hoped from the moment she met him would be more than a friend, was gone and she would never hear his kind voice again.
Flinging herself upwards, she awoke. Her heart was beating fast against her rib cage, her chest hurting at the sense of overwhelming loss and her face, when she passed a hand over it, was wet with tears.
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Teal'c sat in his room surrounded by the lighted candles which helped him to achieve a deep state of meditation. It was something all Jaffa learned how to do from a young age and, although he was unable to kel'no'reem as he once had because he no longer relied on a symbiote for his immune system, he still found he needed to meditate to centre his being and keep his thoughts and spirit in balance.
For some reason however, peace of mind was eluding him today. There was a knock at the door and Teal'c stifled a sigh as he said, "You may enter."
He was surprised to see Vala Mal Doran's face appear around the door and even more surprised when she asked, "Hey, Teal'c. Mind if I join you for a while?"
His surprise came not from the fact that she had sought him out but from the fact that in recent times she had been spending every waking moment near Daniel Jackson and he had felt that his counsel was no longer required. Teal'c indicated with a hand that Vala should sit down in the space in front of him and waited as she lowered herself onto the floor and crossed her legs into a sitting position.
Vala found herself instantly relaxing as she regarded the strong yet gentle man before her. The peace he exuded and the soft light from flickering candles placed all around the edge of the room, eased her worries. Teal'c was pleased to see some of the strain leaving her face although he could see from her eyes that she was still very upset about something. "Is something troubling you, Vala Mal Doran?"
"You could say that…" Vala sighed. "I've been having the same dream for several nights now…this is going to sound a little wonko but I'm wondering if it's more than just a dream…if it's a warning." She looked a little anxious as she spoke as if she feared being ridiculed.
If Teal'c found her statement strange, he didn't show it, merely raised an eyebrow in that way that could mean he was experiencing a whole host of reactions. "I have heard talk of such things among my people and the Tau'ri. Is this something you have experienced before Vala Mal Doran? Is this a common occurrence among your own people?"
Vala shook her head emphatically. "No, I've never heard of anyone of my people having dreams like this and I've certainly never had one like this before. I mean I know I had that dream that Adria gave me, you know, the one about where to find the Sangraal, but that was just an idea clicking into place…This dream is so vivid and detailed and frightening and it's always the same…I'm scared one of us is going to get hurt…or worse than that."
Softly Teal'c asked, "Do you wish to tell me your dream?"
Vala nodded then frowned as she tried to recall the details: "We arrive on a planet that I'm sure I've never been to…It's covered with snow, white everywhere so bright it hurts my eyes to look at it, and there are two moons in the sky…We head towards this village, pretty ordinary looking, not advanced or anything, surrounded by a stone wall…There's a sick child and a tall man with dark hair asks me to help her…then everything changes and we're underground, really deep underground…We go over an archway made of ice…there's a chasm in the ice…I slip and nearly fall in…"
Vala shuddered at the memory and took a deep breath before continuing with her account: "Then we're all making our way through a vast cavern. You know that feeling you get when there's something wrong but you don't know what it is…everything just feels wrong: as if we're in some terrible danger…I can see stones in the floor covered with writing and we're trying to get to the other side…and up ahead of me I can see Daniel…Daniel's leading and…"
Vala's breathing had quickened and Teal'c could see deep anguish on her face as she said, "Suddenly he just disappears…a hole opens up in the floor…Then you're all yelling his name…but…I know he's dead, Daniel's dead…and then I wake up…" She used the backs of her hands to dash away the tears that were threatening to fall.
Teal'c leaned forward and took hold of Vala's cold thin hands in his warm comforting ones. "If we go to such a planet, we will take precautions so that this event does not occur." He paused then said, "I believe you should share what you have told me with Colonel Mitchell and the others."
Vala squeezed his hands before extracting her own from his gentle grasp and running her fingers through her wild hair. "I don't know about that Teal'c. What if it's just a dream and nothing comes of it? They'll think I've just gone…wonko! They don't always take me seriously as it is…I don't want to give them any reason to take back what little respect I've earned."
"You have earned all of our respect and it cannot be lost as lightly as you fear," Teal'c stated, frowning at her insecurity. "Perhaps you should at least talk to Daniel Jackson and warn him of the fate you believe may occur should we not take precautions against it? Surely he deserves to know what you fear and is not the point of such a dream to change the course of future events?"
Vala sighed deeply. "Maybe, Teal'c. I don't know…What would I say? I mean would I walk into his office and say 'Hey Daniel, I've been dreaming about you dying.' Oh yeah, that came out exactly right! He'll think I mean I'm annoyed with him or something…if I try to explain, well, I'm not sure Daniel would listen to anything I have to say at the moment. He hates me interrupting him. 'Shut up Vala, can't you see I'm busy,' yes that's the reaction I'll get."
Teal'c raised an eyebrow, upset by the obvious bitterness in her voice. "I believed the two of you were working together well, that you had come to some sort of understanding and stopped…" Stopped playing games with each other's feelings, Teal'c wanted to say but instead asked abruptly, "Has Daniel Jackson not been teaching you ancient languages because he believes that you can assist him?"
"Yes, he'll talk to me about work but that's it. I thought, well I thought after we found the Ark of Truth that things were different between us, that somehow we'd crossed a line but he's retreated…back in his own little Daniel world, where we can't talk about anything personal, can't talk about how we feel."
Vala choked on the words and shook her head. "No, I can't tell him I've been dreaming about him, he'll get the wrong idea and run a mile." When she continued, her voice was so soft, Teal'c had to strain to hear her, "I'm afraid he'll shut me out completely."
Teal'c was thinking aloud as he wondered: "What has happened to make this barrier between you once again? I am certain that Daniel Jackson cares for you greatly."
Vala's face lit up with hope but she shook her head again. "I thought we were friends…but…I don't know, Teal'c, he's been awkward with me recently, keeping his distance ever since we got back from Celestis. He doesn't talk to me, just can't seem to talk to me like we're even friends.
"When we're not working, he seems to want to avoid me. I know he's obsessed with the translation of the Asgard database, languages are Daniel's first love after all but…oh, I don't know, sometimes I think it's just an excuse to get away from me…Maybe he has had enough of me…Maybe I was mistaken that we were friends."
Teal'c sighed with frustration. Why did humans have to make their relationships so complicated? He knew what everyone else didn't: that given a chance to work out their differences and lower their personal barriers, Vala Mal Doran and Daniel Jackson could have a future together.
Only he remembered the experience of SG-1 being stuck aboard the Odyssey in a time dilation field. Only he remembered that once they had got over their fear of being hurt, Vala Mal Doran and Daniel Jackson had been good together. They had also been good for each other.
Daniel's earlier willingness to trust Vala had given her a chance to be a better person: to leave behind the life she had been forced into after being released by the Tok'ra from being a host to the Goa'uld Qetesh. He had given her a fresh start, an opportunity to put down some roots. On board the Odyssey, his gentleness and kindness had smoothed out Vala's rough edges making her a sweeter person to be around.
For her part, Vala's passion had fulfilled a deep need in Daniel, given him the unconditional love and security he needed to feel 'home'. She had made him remember how to laugh and enjoy life, something he had lost when Sha're his first wife had been taken as a Goa'uld host and eventually died at Teal'c's own hand.
Now Teal'c wondered how this fulfilling and essential relationship could even start if Daniel Jackson was too afraid to acknowledge his feelings, if he feared spending time alone with Vala Mal Doran that wasn't related to his work. Could he, Teal'c, help them become what they should be without giving away what he knew? Should he even try?
Vala was lost in her own thoughts when Teal'c asked quietly, "May I offer you some advice?"
Vala smiled at him. "Of course, Muscles. Your advice is always welcome."
The big man leaned forward and once again took her hand in his. "Do not be afraid to let Daniel Jackson know that you care for him, that you want to be more than a friend. Show him your true heart."
Vala swallowed the fear that rose in her throat and threatened to steal the words needed to describe her true feelings: "I have tried letting him know I want more than friendship, Teal'c, but he just pushes me away…he's always pushing me away. Sometimes I don't think he even finds me attractive…Hard to believe, I know," she added in her more usual self-assured manner as she tried to maintain the hard-boiled exterior that was threatening to desert her.
Teal'c persevered with his advice: "Daniel Jackson does not need to know that you find him attractive, Vala Mal Doran. He needs to know that you will not become bored with him. He needs to know that your feelings are deep enough to outlast the physical attraction which will fade with time. He needs to know your heart."
All at once, Vala lost her bravado and stared at him wide-eyed. Hesitantly she whispered, "I do care for him, Teal'c. I think maybe I love him but I don't seem to be able to show him."
"You will find a way…For now, I will keep what you have told me to myself but I do believe you should tell the others what you have dreamed." He pulled her gently to her feet as he himself rose. "Would you care to take breakfast with me? It is early but perhaps some food would be of comfort to you."
Vala squeezed his hand then gave the tall man a grateful hug. "Thanks, Muscles. That would be really nice."
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Daniel slept fitfully: he was still plagued by dreams of SG-1's last mission to defeat the armies of the Ori and by his own experiences on Celestis at the hands of the Ori mouthpiece, the Doci. He had been faced with death before, as they all had: had in fact died and been helped to ascend by Oma Desala on one occasion but this time his brush with mortality had been different. The insidious incessant pounding of the Doci's mantra battering at him had hurt mentally and physically and the knowledge that people he cared about were in danger or already dead had taken its toll. Although he and his teammates had survived the experience, the inner scars were taking a long time to heal.
And so now he dreamed: dreamed that he was back lying on the hard floor of a cell deep in the dungeons below the Ori city, with no hope of rescue in sight. The cold and damp leeched into his bones sucking the warmth from his very soul, making it hard to feel anything except mind-numbing tiredness and hopelessness. He had failed to find the Ark of Truth quickly enough: it was his fault that Teal'c had been shot down by the Ori soldiers, that Tomin and Vala had been captured.
Hear the word of Origin. Hear the word of Origin. He couldn't fight the insistent voice much longer. In the distance he heard screaming: was it Tomin? Or was he hearing himself?
Don't give up. Fight. Your friends need you. Vala needs you. Vala! Was Vala still alive? When had he last seen her? When Teal'c had been shot and they had exchanged a look that was full of loss and regret: the loss of a dear friend; the loss of a friendship; regret over missed opportunities. Why hadn't he ever told Vala how he felt about her? He had to find Vala. If they survived this, he would tell her how he felt.
His dream diverged from reality. The cell door swung open and he crawled his way out and, with his last reserve of strength, heaved himself up to lean against the freezing cold slate-grey rock of the tunnel. He must find Vala. He began stumbling forwards, his feet picking up pace as he searched cell after cell only to find emptiness and silence at every turn. Why couldn't he find her?
He awoke with a start: his heart racing as he reached for the lamp and squinted against its dim light before putting on his glasses and sitting up. The clock said 5.15 a.m. He sat there for a few moments, trying to recover his equilibrium. Everything was fine: they were all safely back at at the SGC. The Ori armies had been defeated and Teal'c was still alive.
Vala wasn't missing and he could go and seek her out whenever he wanted her company: so why did he keep dreaming about Celestis? About her being missing? He sighed. Maybe it was because in that cell, alone and afraid, he had realised that seeing his friends put themselves in danger was getting harder and harder and he wasn't sure that he could watch them risk their lives on the frontline any more: that he couldn't stand by and watch Vala put herself in danger. If he couldn't, then maybe it was time to step down from SG-1 and do something different. But what? He sighed again. I've got some serious thinking to do.
He glanced at the clock again. He'd been translating into the early hours and really ought to get some more sleep before the mission briefing at 09.00 but he also knew he wouldn't be able to settle again now. There was too much to think about; too many decisions that were going to have to be made. He showered quickly, dragged on some clothes and headed towards his office.
Passing Vala's door, he was reminded of one night during the period when she had in fact gone missing during their first and only non-date. Was it really a year ago? Kidnapped by the Goa'uld Athena, Qetesh's rival, and the Trust operatives that worked for her, Vala had lost her memory during a failed rescue attempt and been away from the SGC for nearly three weeks.
Daniel remembered how he had gone and just sat in her room: not knowing what else to do, weary with worry and fear, missing her. After a few minutes, he had jumped up and started pacing: the overwhelming need to be doing something, anything, making him restless. He had peered at objects on the shelves, not really seeing them, until one registered and he had smiled an exasperated smile at the view of the tiny ivory statue of a woman and child, half-heartedly hidden behind a photo frame. He had sighed as he remembered their previous conversation.
"But Daniel, I don't see why I can't have it if you've finished cataloguing it and it's going to be stuck in a box somewhere gathering dust. It's beautiful. It should be looked at…I'll take good care of it."
"How much do you reckon you'd get for it?" he'd asked without thinking. Automatically assuming that she was still thinking like the thief she had been before joining the SGC.
Vala hid her true reaction with over-acted mock outrage. "I'm sorry. What could you possibly mean?"
Daniel couldn't seem to stop himself. "Well, I guess you're thinking about selling it, aren't you?"
Vala looked genuinely hurt for a second then plastered a smile on her face that didn't reach her eyes. "I just though it looked pretty, Daniel, that's all. Never mind." Shoulders slumped, she turned to go.
Daniel was already kicking himself, regretting his stupid words as soon as they left his mouth; sorry he'd misjudged her motives; sorry he still couldn't seem to help basing his expectations of her on the past life she was trying so hard to put behind her; that deep down he knew she had put behind her. He tried to make amends. "Well, er…it's not really up to me. I could ask if…"
"Don't worry about it, Daniel," she said and left the room. The sour feeling that she had been really wounded by his words clung to him for some time after she'd gone.
Daniel had winced at the memory: she was always wrong-footing him, telling the truth when he was expecting a lie and vice versa. He sighed and turned his attention to the photo standing in front of the statue. It was of the SGC personnel in uniform except for Vala: she was wearing inappropriately fluffy hair decorations but still managing to look like an intrepid explorer with her hands on her hips as if daring the universe to send what it liked at her
Daniel had replaced the photograph but, as he did so, he had spotted another photo sticking out of one of his books on Arthurian legend. More interested in how far she had got in the book than the photo itself, Daniel opened the thick tome and found he was looking at a picture of himself, sat on his own in his office, staring off into the far distance. He was certain he didn't remember anyone taking it. On the back it said, 'My Daniel.'
He had blinked thoughtfully as he carefully replaced the photo, closed the book and then had left the room: desperate to get back to thinking of ways to track down where Vala could have gone after her escape from the Trust operatives and trying not to dwell too much on the reasons why she hadn't contacted them.
Now as he reached his office, Daniel realised that since that night over a year ago even though, or maybe even because, their friendship had deepened, he had been avoiding spending time alone with her unless it was work related.
When she had been away, he'd missed her and was longing for her to be back. He had never said that to her, not wanting her to get the wrong idea. Or maybe not wanting her to get the right idea? Why can't I admit my true feelings for her? Was it just embarrassment because he didn't want the rest of the team to tease him? Or was he still afraid he would get hurt by Vala if he dared to let his guard down and open up his heart once more?
Thinking about it now, he could see that Vala had undergone an internal transformation over the preceding twelve months: genuinely interested in his work now; helping him catalogue artefacts; and listening patiently when he tried out his theories on her. She was even learning Latin and proving a quick student.
He had told her she'd proved herself worthy of his trust on a professional level but when it came down to it, he still wasn't able to believe that half of what she said she felt about him wasn't still a lie: she was so good at covering up her true feelings, he didn't know where he stood with her.
She was very good at wheedling confidences out of him but rarely shared any of her own: was she even capable of opening up? Anytime in the past that he felt he had come close to knowing the real her, she had backtracked and left him dangling in uncertainty.
Was it all just some elaborate game to gain his trust? Was he just a prize she was trying to collect and then she would move on to something more exciting? She found him attractive, that much she'd made obvious, but he wanted something that would last beyond a one night stand. He could hardly admit even to himself that he'd wondered what it would be like to build a life with Vala. Will I ever be able to trust her personally?
This last year, they had been through so much together and their friendship had grown stronger. Time and again they had realised just how much they cared for each other but this love-hate jokey thing they had both developed between them to hide from their true feelings wasn't helping either of them: they seemed to be trapped in it now. Was there any way to break out of it and be honest with each other? He sighed.
He thought of the photo he'd found all those months ago. Maybe there was a glimmer of hope that Vala could have serious feelings for him. When he stopped to think about it, Vala was still trying to get close to him in her way but he'd pretty much ignored all her overtures. Maybe she has changed and I'm the one with the problem? Maybe it's time to take a chance and see if our friendship could be something more? He jumped up and started to pace the confines of his office.
"Are you well, Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c had appeared in the office doorway and his question made Daniel jump: for such a big man he was surprisingly stealthy.
Daniel was torn between confiding in someone and not wanting to have his fledgling feelings exposed to someone else, even a friend. "I'm not sure, Teal'c."
As if Teal'c could read his mind anyway, he said, "Vala Mal Doran has asked me to make sure you eat something before we set out on our mission today. She's waiting in the commissary."
Daniel smiled ruefully: he had been known more than once to skip meals when he was engrossed in translating particularly interesting texts, usually working on them right up to the last minute before any mission. "Okay. I'm coming."
As they walked along the corridor, Daniel asked, "How come you're both up so early?"
Teal'c hesitated then said, "Are you not also 'up early' Daniel Jackson?"
"Yes, I suppose I am," he said and Teal'c was relieved when Daniel did not pursue his question further.
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Daniel was leading the briefing on P9G-787. He was standing in the briefing room (at the head of the table facing General Landry and the rest of SG-1) and was in full flow, his excitement barely contained: "The area around the Stargate shows the remains of some very ancient architecture: maybe a temple or other sacred buildings. However the obelisk standing in front of the Stargate is made from different material from that of the ruins and is inscribed with text which derives from mediaeval Latin. So it looks as if it might be of later construction and that there could possibly be another society living here that has been influenced by Merlin in some way.
"Each face of the obelisk seems to be dedicated to a different Element: air, water, earth and fire." Daniel zoomed in on some writing on the picture on the screen. "Then running around the obelisk is a line of text written in Ancient."
Hearing the emphasis in his voice that meant the text was written in the language of the original Gate-builders (and the beings whose energy-realm Daniel had been part of for a brief time when he had ascended), the rest of the members gathered around the table sat up a little straighter and exchanged interested glances.
Daniel continued: "It says 'Seekers of the Shield of Myrddin, or Merlin as we know him, must conquer the elements to reveal its truth, light and power.'" He brought up another picture of the obelisk on the screen behind him and paused before saying, "There's no other indication of what this Shield actually is but I'm hoping we'll find it's another technology left by the Ancients that could be of use to us."
Sam nodded, running through possibilities in her mind. "It sounds like it would be some sort of force field or other defensive technology. It's worth investigating, I think. What about this 'conquering the elements'? What do you think that means, Daniel?"
Daniel waved his hands: "I don't know but I'm guessing there are some challenges to face before we can get anywhere near the Shield…You know, the usual sort of thing: proving our worth and facing mild peril or danger!"
Cameron groaned, remembering his fight with the holographic knight under the Tor at Glastonbury. Unconsciously, he rubbed his arm where one of the knight's many blows had hit its target.
Daniel brought up images of the area surrounding the Stargate: there were snow covered trees and pictures of a white looking sun setting in a blue-green sky followed by pictures of twin moons gradually rising to lord it over the night time panorama. He turned back towards the team and, because of his position, was the only one to notice Vala's face drain of colour. She held onto the briefing table as if she was afraid of fainting. He carried on talking for a moment or two and then stopped. "Vala, are you feeling okay?"
Vala pulled herself together, shaking off the images that had sprung to mind from her dream. "Yes, I'm fine, Daniel. Sorry. Carry on."
Teal'c turned from the view of twin moons above the wintry night time scene and caught Vala's eye. Imperceptibly, she acknowledged his questioning look.
Cameron asked: "Did the MALP spot any people?"
Daniel shook his head. "Nothing close to the Stargate but we sent up a UAV as well and there appears to be one village about a mile from the Gate and another further out. The houses appear to be mainly stone or wood, mediaeval in design: much like other places we've visited where Merlin's had an influence. There wasn't much sign of movement but it appears to be winter there so everyone's probably under cover, keeping warm."
Cameron nodded. "Okay so we'll break out our arctic gear. Anything else we need to know?"
"No, that's all the information we have so far," Daniel said.
General Landry pushed back from the table, saying, "You're scheduled to leave at 1300 hours. You can have 24 hours to make contact with these people and find out what they know about this Shield and if there's anything we can trade with them for it or anything else that might be of interest."
As the others headed out of the room to get ready for the mission, Teal'c detained Vala and asked quietly, "Do you not think now would be the time to speak Vala Mal Doran?"
Landry had been about to step into his office but overheard Teal'c's question. "Do you know something about this planet, Vala? Something that wasn't brought up at the briefing?"
Vala's colour heightened but she said firmly. "No, sir. It looked a little familiar but I'm sure I've never been there before."
Landry looked from Vala to Teal'c then said, "Well, alright. Go and get ready for the mission then."
"Yes, sir."
Teal'c rose slowly from the table, his eyes following Vala Mal Doran as she hurried out of the briefing room. He did not understand her reluctance to mention her dream when it looked more and more apparent that it was something beyond mere dreaming. Perhaps her feelings for Daniel Jackson, and her fear that they would never be reciprocated, were clouding her judgement.
General Landry gazed thoughtfully after Vala. "What was that all about, Teal'c? Is there something going on I should know about?"
Teal'c looked inscrutable as he deliberated how to answer the question truthfully without betraying Vala's confidence. "I am not able to say," he said at last.
Landry looked at him carefully, understanding the statement was literally the truth, then said, "Alright Teal'c…Just keep everybody safe."
Teal'c nodded, acknowledging Landry's concern. "As always, I will endeavour to do so."
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Vala watched Daniel at work in his office for a few minutes. Not for the first time, she tried to work out just what it was that made him so fascinating, so appealing. He was intelligent, gentle, kind, and definitely not like anyone she'd come across in her life before – not that surprising given that she'd spent years dealing with smugglers, petty thieves and the universe's most unwanted – and of course he was drop dead gorgeous. Drop dead gorgeous and yet seemingly unaware of it.
And he was her friend…although sometimes he could be really quite mean…but then I guess I do needle him into it sometimes. She sighed heavily, before putting on her brightest smile and knocking lightly on the door frame. "Hey gorgeous. Need any help packing up your gear? I'm just about finished with mine."
Daniel looked up from his latest notes on Asgard history and stared at Vala for a second without really seeing her. She stifled another sigh and waited for him to come into the present.
"Oh. Oh sorry, Vala. Yes, that would be good. I'd lost track of time…" Gracing her with a slight smile, he added, "As usual."
Vala smiled back at him, relieved to find him in a good mood and for the moment at ease with her. Maybe she should confide in him, tell him about her premonition. Anxious knots twisted in her stomach as she tried to summon the courage to begin.
Daniel started packing by putting his collection of minute archaeological tools and a digital camera into his Air-force issue rucksack. "Could you find my copy of Jenkins and my green notebook for me, please?"
"Sure." With the confidence born of familiarity with Daniel's office and his work, Vala went straight to the middle shelf in his bookcase and found the appropriate book. Then she walked across to the small desk in the corner and fingered his battered green notebook with reverence. She knew that Daniel's notebooks were an extension of his thought processes, part of what made him unique. Turning to find him watching her with thoughtful eyes, she blushed slightly and quickly handed the books over to him.
"I thought Jenkins drove you nuts? Didn't you say he'd made lots of basic errors?" Distraction was an easy friend and a good tool where Daniel was concerned.
"Er, well, yes, yes I did." Daniel seemed surprised she'd remembered what he had said on that particular subject. "But he still has some useful translations of the more obscure dialects. It might help with any other inscriptions we come across." As he positioned the books carefully in his bag, he sighed. "My brain's full of Asgard history and science at the moment!"
"I know, darling, you hardly spoke to me yesterday and when you did, I didn't understand a word you were saying!" Vala pouted. "I figured you were either talking Asgard or had finally flipped altogether."
Daniel blinked at her then carried on with what he'd been saying. "I wish I could just concentrate on the Asgard database for a while, really get to grips with it all. I'd love to write a comprehensive dictionary of their language and help the techs with an encyclopaedia of all their scientific knowledge.
"Maybe now the Ori are no longer a threat and the Universe has quietened down a bit, I could get away from being on the front-line so much and spend more time working on translating. Maybe get more involved in teaching."
Vala made a face. "You should know better than to make statements about the Universe quietening down, Daniel! There'll soon be another bunch of bad guys to take the place of the Ori. Just hope they're not as hard to defeat."
She stepped closer to his side. "No, I wouldn't count on it staying quiet for long!...But you're right about getting away. After our last mission, I think most of us are in need of a real break. Maybe we should be using this brief time of peace and quiet to get away from work. Maybe relaxing, spending time together…together with friends I mean."
Daniel barely registered her speech. "I'll have to talk to Mitchell again about taking Dr Fowler on the occasional mission instead of me. Sam gets to go do research every so often so I don't see why I shouldn't. I'm sure there's no need for me to be here so much."
Vala felt as if someone had gripped her heart in their hands and was slowly, painfully squeezing the life out of it. She wanted to grab hold of the infuriating man standing next to her and shout at him, 'Tell me you're not thinking of leaving us, of leaving me. I can't stay here if you go. I can't, I won't. Take me with you. Don't you know I love you,' but instead she calmly handed him his spare glasses and observed: "Mitchell won't like that, darling. You know how he feels about breaking up the gang…Of course, you could do with some more help translating what's been downloaded so far from the Asgard database…Couldn't you teach m-…more people the Asgard language? You know have an assistant here who could work with you on the translations."
"Maybe." Daniel's face took on that faraway look again as if he was thinking through ideas and options in his head, unaware that Vala was even there. "Or maybe I really should think about leaving the SGC. Maybe it's time. I've got other interests that I've been neglecting for a long time now and I would love to get back into some really rigorous academic study before my brain gets too out of practice."
He frowned. "Then again what could be a more worthwhile occupation than helping to open up the Asgard legacy to the human race so that everyone could benefit from their knowledge…Hmm…When the scientists at Area 51 finally think of a way to get the complete knowledge base off Odyssey and installed there, perhaps I should think about going with it? At least I'd have a ready-made team I could train up and then maybe the translation wouldn't take the rest of my life to complete."
Daniel was walking around collecting more items to go in his bag and so didn't notice the stricken look that passed across Vala's face at his words. As she headed for the door, the phantom hands squeezed her heart even tighter. Without looking at Daniel she said quietly, "Don't forget to make time to have a life, Daniel…Or you'll wake up one day knowing all the secrets of the Asgard but have no-one to share them with."
Daniel looked up in surprise and turned to speak to her only to find she was already gone. Suddenly, some of the things she'd said registered. Was she asking to help him, be a partner not just an assistant? Asking him to make room for her in his plans? And if she was, what was he going to reply? Was he ready to let her be part of his life?
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A few minutes before SG-1's scheduled mission time, Vala knocked on General Landry's office door. As soon as he barked, "Come", she stuck her head around the door and waited uncertainly for him to look up from his desk to see who was there. As it was unusual for her to visit him, he looked at her in some astonishment. "Oh, come in, Vala. Sit down. Everything set for the mission?"
"Yes, sir." Vala fidgeted where she sat: fingers tapping her legs and teeth biting her lip nervously.
Her body language screamed out to the General that she wanted to ask him something unusual but wasn't sure what reaction she would get. Given Vala's outrageous and sometimes downright immoral outlook in the past, Landry wondered nervously what on earth it was she was going to say. He mentally prepared himself not to show any emotion before asking, "Then what can I do for you?"
Her words came out in a rush. "Well, I know this is a little unusual but I was wondering if you would give me permission to take the Goa'uld healing device on the mission. I believe Dr. Lam has it under lock and key in the infirmary for some research she arranged to do on it."
This was not a question Landry had expected and he wondered why Vala wanted to borrow the device. Did it have something to do with her odd behaviour at the briefing earlier? "Any particular reason you want to borrow it?" he asked sternly. "I mean are you sure there isn't something you know about this planet that you should be telling me, Vala?"
She shook her head but looked uncomfortable. Landry's expression softened, trying to draw a confidence out of her. "You know what it means to be one of us now, Vala. You really shouldn't be keeping things from your team especially if it could put someone in danger. Are you sure there isn't something about this planet that you should be sharing?"
Vala deliberated whether to tell him about her dreams. She was on the verge of doing so but decided against it. Her commanding officer thought she was a bit flaky at the best of times. It was better not to give him any reason to take her off SG-1. She didn't want to be left behind: Daniel's life depended on it.
"No, sir. Like I said earlier, I've never seen this planet before. I'm not even sure why I want to take the healing device…I just have this feeling that I'm going to need it."
Landry gave her a long hard look. It had taken a long time to get to the point where he trusted her judgement as much as the rest of SG-1 but he was only slightly surprised to find he did. Vala had more than proved herself and he felt that he could trust her motives now that she was asking something out of the ordinary.
His face softened again as he said, "I hope you're wrong about needing it but yes, you may take it with you."
Vala breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you, sir."
"Well, you'd better run down to the infirmary. It's not long till you ship out. I'll ring Dr. Lam and let her know you're coming." He picked up the phone on his desk but, as she turned to leave, he called after her with a hint of concern, "Vala…just be careful on this mission. Look after yourself and everyone else…After all we've been through together the last few months and survived, I wouldn't want to lose anyone now."
Vala's eyes were very serious as she looked back at him. "I'll do everything in my power to keep SG-1 safe, sir."
Landry nodded, accepting that she would be as good as her word…but would she look after herself? A little knot of unease appeared in his stomach as she closed the door behind her: almost as if he feared it would be the last time he saw her.