MeeTing a President, even if he's one that shouldn't technically be alive, is pretty cool, I must admit. But, I'm feeling like the next few days aren't going to be very fun. I'm not even sure how being a Reality Shifter is going to affect me when they start using the time machine.
Bad carnival music was playing behind the Mystery Shack as a small festival was being set up. A few things were falling apart here and there, but nobody batted an eye at it. Stan smiled. "There she is, Mable! The cheapest fair money can rent! I spared every expense." Cassie tackled Stan as something snapped above. "Hey! What do you think" Dipper screamed as he fell, and skyhook carriage landing where Stan was before Cassie tackled him.
"Sorry, you were a few feet too far to the right." All three looked at Dipper.
"I think the skytram is broken." Said Dipper. "Also, most of my bones." Stan laughed.
"This guy!" Dipper jumped out of the carriage. "Alright, alright, I've got a job for you three." Stan reached inside his suit and pulled out a clipboard. "I printed up a bunch of fake safety inspection certificates!" He handed the clipboard to Dipper. "Go slap one on anything that looks like a lawsuit!" Dipper handed a small stack to Mable, then to Cassie.
"Grunkle Stan, Is that legal?" Asked Mable. Cassie shook her head.
"When was the last tiMe Stan cared about legality?"
"When there's no cops around, anything's legal!" Agreed Stan. He turned. "Soos! How's that dunk tank coming along?" He ran over to Soos, who was welding together the last few pieces. He looked up, turned off his welder, and lifted his welding helmet.
"Almost ready to go, Mr. Pines!" Stan banged on the target a few times, and the seat barely moved.
"Hah! You've got it rigged from here to Timbuktu! There's nothing on Earth that could knock me down!"
"Yeah, except for like a futuristic lasEr arm cannon."
"Agh!" Said Stan. He patted himself down. "Say, you haven't seen my red screwdriver around, have ya?" Stan opened Soos's toolbox. "The darn thing went missing."
"Maybe some magical creature or paranormal thingum took it." Suggested Soos.
"Oi! You've Been spending too much time with those kids. Alright, let's see, where'd I" from behind a few porta potties, someone glanced at Stan and Soos before turning around. He lifted Stan's screwdriver in his left hand before bringing his watch up.
"The mission is proceeding as planned, over." He used Stan's screwdriver to adjust his watch a little, changing his clothing to camouflage himself.
Strange things taking place
Nowhere to hide, nowhere is safe.
Weirdness is in every case.
But our smarts combined
will solve every puzzle fAced.
That is a guarantee!
Cassie put up the last paper she had. "Okay, that's done. Now, to go back to the shop in town to complete my alibi." She created a Dimensional Gate in front of herself, and stepped through.
"It's 12 o'clock! The dunk tank is now officially open!" Said Stan, through a microphone. Cassie went through her Dimensional Gate before the high pitched whine sounded through the fair, making everybody recoil. "Step right up and dunk me, folks!" Stan turned to a nearby guy. "I'm talking to you, cutoffs!" People began gathering around the tank. "That's right! Muffin Top, High Pants! Who wants a piece of me?" The crowd in front of Stan all threw their baseballs, but none dunked him. Stan began laughing. "Come back anytime folks!" Nearby, Dipper and Wendy got question mark shaped corn dogs.
"How do they get them into this shape?" Asked Dipper. "It's unnatural!"
"But Dipper," started Wendy, "they're so", she held her corn dog up to the sign, making the statement into a question, "delicious?" They both Began laughing, and some cheese dripped onto Wendy's shirt. "Oh, boo! I'll be right back." She walked off to get a napkin.
"I'll be right here!" Laughed Dipper. "I love you." He whispered. Mable walked up, with cotton candY.
"Look at you two, getting all romantic at the fair!" She said. Dipper grinned.
"Come on, it's no big deal!"
"Yeah it is!" Countered Mable. Cassie walked up.
"Okay, you're right, it is! Isn't thIs amazing? I just dove in! I said, hey, you want to hang out at the fair? And you know what she said?" Dipper remembered when he asked. "Yeah, I guess so! It totally worked! All your advice for just going for it, it's finally paying off!"
"When are you going to learn, Dipper? I'm alwayS right about everything!"
"If that's true, then what's the best way to deal with the spider on your back?" Asked Cassie.
"What?" Asked Mable. She looked back. "There's no spider." She sniffed. "Say, do you smell a gallon of body spray?" Robbie walked up.
"Hey, any of you dorks seen Wendy around?" He asked.
"Who wants to know?" Countered Dipper. Robbie grabbed a chunk of Mable's cotton candy.
"Hey!"
"Yeah, I got some new super tight jeans." Bragged Robbie, stepping up on a small crate to show them off. "Thought she might want to check 'em out." He stretched forward a little, making his pants sound like overstretched rubber.
"Yeah, I think I saw her in the bottomless pit!" Said Dipper. "You should really go jump in there!"
"MAybe I will, smart guy!" Countered Robbie. He walked forward, purposely bumping into Dipper.
"He is such a jerk." Said Mable, as soon as he was out of earshot. Cassie laughed.
"Mable, you're right, he is. But he could always be worse."
"Yeah, but he's a jerk with tight pants and a guiTar!" Said Dipper. "I need to keep him away from Wendy at all costs."
"Tight pants are more of a health hazard than a girl getter." Mentioned Cassie.
"Don't worry brother, whatever happens, I'll be right here, supporting you every step of the OH MY GOSH! A PIG!" Mable noticed a flyer on a pole. She began running, bumpIng into several people as she did.
"Ifn you can guess the critter's weight, you can take the critter hoMe!" Said the guy running the stall. Mable ran up, and started looking at the pigs. She saw one that was mostly clean, and looking at her.
"Mab-el." Oinked the pig. Mable gasped.
"He said Mable! Either that or doorbell. Did you say Mable or doorbell?"
"Mab-el." OinkEd the pig again. Mable smiled brightly enough to blind someone. Pacifica and her cronies walked by.
"Oh look, Mable here found her real twin!" She said. The group of three laughed as Cassie walked up.
"Do you make fun of people because it's expected, or because it hides the fact that you have no friends?" Asked Cassie. Pacifica gLared at her. "Anything you can do to me, I've seen worse." Pacifica and her cronies walked away.
"Pacifica!" Said Mable, darkly. She looked back at the stall. "Sir, I must have that pig!"
"Ah, old 15-poundie. So, how much you guessing he weighs?"
"Um, 15 pounds?" Asked Mable.
"Are you some kind of wItch?" Asked the guy. He picked up the pig and handed it to her. "Well, here's your pig." The pig oinked in Mable's hands, and she turned around, excited as could be. "And you'll be needing these." The guy attempted to hand Mable a fork and knife, and she glared at him. "No? Suit yourself!" Mable looked back at the pig, and hugged him.
"Everything is different now." She whispered.
"So, what are you naming him?" Asked Cassie.
Wendy and Dipper continued walking, only to stop when WeNdy saw something she wanted. "Hey, check it out!" She pointed out a stall. "I don't know if it's a duck or a panda, but I want one." They walked up to the stall. Dipper turned to her.
"My uncle taught me the secret to these games. You aim for the carnie's head, and take the prize while he's unconscious!"
Wendy laughed. "Nice." Dipper turned back to the stall.
"One ball please." He handed over a ticket and was given a baseball.
"You only get one chancE." Dipper looked at Wendy, who smiled and gave him two thumbs up. Dipper looked back at the bottles and began swinging his arm.
"And a one, and a two, and a" he grunted as he threw the ball. It hit the table the bottles were standing on and bounced back, striking Wendy hard and giving her a black eye.
"OW! My eye!" She yelled.
"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, Wendy, are you okay?" Asked Dipper. Wendy turned to him.
"Does it look swollen?" Dipper stepped back in surprise.
"Everything's going to be fine! Don't worry, I'll," he looked around, "I'll go get some ice!" He ran off to the shack and opened the freezer. He grabbed a bag of ice and ran back. "Where is she, where is she?" Dipper ran into someone, launching the bag into the air and scattering the ice. He started shoveling it back in, and glared at the guy. "Hey! Watch where you're going, man!" The guy grabbed his tape measure and ran off. Dipper finished shoveling the ice back in, and started his run again, only to stop quickly.
"Alright, just ease your eyeball into that freezycone." Said Robbie, holding a snow cone to Wendy's eye.
"Ah, Robbie, thanks. That's really sweet. The gesture, and the flavored syrup."
"Yeah, I was just here at the right place at the right time." Dipper grimaced. "You know, I've been meaning to ask you, we've been spending a lot of time together, and I was wondering if, maybe, you wanted to go out with me?" Dipper closed in on himself, squeezing the bag of ice.
"Yeah, I guess so." Said Wendy.
"Sweet!" Said Robbie. Dipper's face fell as someone threw a dart at a red balloon behind him. It popped. The ice bag then ripped open, scattering the ice everywhere. Mable walked up.
"Look Dipper! I won my pet pig! His name is Waddles! I call him that because he waddles!" She shook Waddles a bit.
"Everything is different now." Whispered Dipper.
"What're you looking at?" Asked Mable. Dipper pointed to Wendy and Robbie, and she looked as well. Robbie pulled Wendy with him to the Tunnel of Love and Corn Dogs. "Oh." Cassie ran up.
"I missed it, didn't I?" She asked.
Dipper continued wandering the park as the sun set, the lights coming on. He eventually got tired, and laid down, blocking a game. "Uh, are you gonna move?" Asked someone, wanting to play. Dipper groaned, and the guy left, sighing. Mable walked up with Waddles in a doctors costume.
"Paging Dr. Waddles, we've got a boy here with a broken heart." Mable laughed, but stopped quickly when Dipper didn't laugh with her. "Come on man, these are the jokes."
"Mable, do you ever wish you could go back and undo just one mistake?" Asked Dipper.
"Nope! I do everything right all the time!" She played with Waddle's forelegs as Dipper sat up.
"I mean, Wendy only went out with Robbie because he was there with the ice, and she only needed ice because of the baseball, and I would've had the ice if it wasn't for" Dipper gasped. "That guy!" He pointed at the guy he had ran into earlier. "Hey you! Tool belt! You ruined my life!" Dipper got up and began marching towards the guy.
"Huh?"
"Don't 'huh' me! I've seen you before!" Accused Dipper. "What's your deal, are you following us around?"
"And why are you bald, what's that all about?" Asked Mable.
"Oh! My position has been compromised! Assuming Stealth Mode!" The guy adjusted his watch. "Color match, initiating color match! Come on, dang it!" He took out the screwdriver again and began fiddling with his watch.
"That's amazing!" Said Mable. She gasped. "Are you from the future or something?"
"Uh, no! Who told you that?" He grabbed something from his pocket. "Memory wipe!" He threw it at Mable, who peeled it from her face.
"This is a baby wipe." The guy sat down on a bundle of hay, sighing.
"Alright, you've cornered me. I'm a time traveler."
"So, wait a minute, if you're from the future, then do you have a time machine, or something?" Asked Dipper.
"That's kinda how it works." Said the guy. Dipper noticed Wendy and Robbie on the Ferris wheel as they went up.
"Can I borrow it?" The guy stood up quickly.
"No!"
"Come on, can't I use your Time Machine just once?" Asked Dipper, pressing the point.
"Out of the question!" The guy grabbed his tape measure. "You know this is complicated, extremely sensitive time equipment!" The guy pulled out the tape a bit.
"It looks like a tape measure."
"You shut your time mouth!"
"Think making any sense to you?" Asked Dipper.
"I think he's just crazy." Whispered Mable.
"Oh, you don't believe me?" The guy pulled out the tape a bit and released it, suddenly glowing before vanishing. He reappeared in a completely different outfit after just a moment. "Guess where I was!"
"Whoa!" Said Dipper and Mable.
"That's right! 15 years ago, there was a costume store right here! One second." He pulled the tape out again and vanished. Cassie walked up as he reappeared, on fire. "Aw heck!" He patted them out. "Pat down!"
"So, who were you again?" Asked Mable. The guy started to pull out his identification card.
"Blendin Benjamin Blandin, from the year twenty snevity three, right?" Asked Cassie. "Time Anomaly Removal Crew?"
"Wh-who told you that?!" Asked Blendin. "And it's twenty snevity twelve, thank you! My mission is to stop a series of time anomalies that are supposed to happen at this very location. B-but I don't see any anomalies! I don't know if it's some kind of paradox, or if I'm just really tired." Blendin sat down on the hay again, and his watch started beeping. "Wait, found one!" He stood up aGain, and began looking around, looking at his watch. "It says it's right" he looked at Cassie. "You! You're a Time Anomaly!"
"Reality Shifter." She replied. "My name's Cassie." Blendin sighed.
"Great. An exempt anomaly." He sat back down. Dipper and Mable looked at each other before turning back.
"You know, yoU sound like you could use a break." Said Dipper.
"Definitely, definitely." Agreed Mable, grabbing two tickets. "Might we recommend one of the various attractions at the Mystery Fair?" Blendin stood up.
"You know what? What the heck!" He pointed at himself flamboyantly. "I'm worth it!" He grabbed the tickets Mable was holding out and started walking away, only to turn and look at them. "But I've got my eye on you." He walked away backwards. Cassie looked at the two.
"If you guys end up going through time with his time machine, you had better make sure that I'm with you." She warned. "Because of how I react to time, anything could happen if I don't travel with you, got it?"
"Got it." Said Dipper.
"Yep!" Agreed Mable.
BlAndin walked up to one of the rides. "One please!" He put his tickets into the barrel. Soos looked his over.
"Uh, sorry dude. But you're going to have to take your belt off for the ride. One of your tools might fly off and accidentally fix something." Blendin took it off, and handed it to Soos.
"Guard it with your life!"
"I will watch it like a hawk, dude." Blendin walked onto the ride and it started up after he got in.
"Woohoo!" Yelled Blandin as the ride went. Someone went up and grabbed the belt.
"Like a hawk!" Called Soos.
Dipper and Mable looked down at the time machine. "Here it is, Mable." Said Dipper. "Our ticket to any moment in history."
"Let's go get two dodos and foRce them to make out!" Said Mable.
"No!" Said Dipper. "We've got to be smart about this! All that paradox talk kinds freaked me out, and what Cassie said. All I'm going to do is go back and fix my one mistake. If I don't miss that baseball throw, I won't hit Wendy in the eye, and Robbie won't comfort her, and they won't start going out."
"I'm coming too!" Said Mable. "I want to relieve the greatest moment of my life! Winning Waddles!" Mable kissed him and he snorted a bit. Dipper grabbed the time machine, and pulled out the tape. He looked at where he had it set to, and confirmed it.
"See you later." Said Dipper.
"See you earlier!" Corrected Mable. "Yuk yuk yuk!" Dipper pressed the backwards button on the top, and the two high-fived as Cassie ran in.
"What diD I tell you guys!" She yelled as they glowed. Waddles leapt away, squealing, as time came to a stop for Dipper and Mable.
aab
Soos was eating a big sandwich as time slowed, and a guy was throwing another baseball at Stan.
Dipper and Mable vanished, travelling back in time. Waddles started running in reverse.
Soos unate his sandwich as time reversed, and the guy's baseball came back to him. The Ferris wheel rotated backwards as the sun came back up, time being undone.
Dipper and Mable reappeared at the table, with Dipper's hat on fire. He patted it out quickly, then the two looked at each other before running to the door. Dipper grabbed the time machine as he went. The two opened the door just in time to hear Stan. "It's twelve o'clock!" He called over the intercom. "The Dunk Tank is now open!" The two looked to the right to see Cassie entering a Dimensional Gate just as the squealing started in the speakers. "Step right up and dunk me folks! I'm talking to you, cut-offs!" Dipper and Mable walked around before looking at each other.
"Do over?" Asked Dipper.
"Do over!" Agreed Mable. She ran to the pIg stall.
"Ifn you can guess th"
"Fifteen pounds!" Said Mable, interrupting him, already holding Waddles. She walked off before running back. "And yes, I am a witch!" She walked off again.
"Well, time to round up a mob." Said the guy, grabbing a torch and lighting it.
Dipper ran up to Wendy. "Hey Wendy!" He said.
"There you are! Hey, whAt happened to your hat?"
"Uh, nothing. Hey look! What's that?" Dipper pointed at a stall.
"Whoa! Check it out! I don't know if it's a duck or a panda, but I want one." Dipper grinned.
"One ball please." He held out a ticket.
"You only get one chance." The guy held out a ball for Dipper.
"That's what you think." He grabbed it and looked at Wendy, who gave him a thumbs up. "One panda duck, coming right up." He took a breath. "Okay Dipper, second chance, don't mess this up." He threw the ball, knocking over the bottles. "Yes!" The ball hit the wall and bounced back, hitting Wendy in the eye.
"Ow! My eye!"
"What?" Asked Dipper. Wendy turned to him.
"Does it look swollen?" Dipper looked around.
"That's so weird." Robbie walked up.
"Oh, hey Robbie." Said Wendy. Robbie held up his snow cone, and Dipper could only watch as the scenario he had watched before played out.
"So, anyway, we've been hangiNg out a lot, and I was wondering if, uh, you wanted to go out with me?" Wendy didn't reply for a moment.
"Yeah, I guess so."
"Sweet!" Said Robbie. Dipper's eye twitched as he watched them go back to the Tunnel of Love and Corn dogs.
"The exact same thing happened twice. It was spooky." Said Dipper. Cassie ran up.
"I missed it, didn't I?" She asked.
"Oh! Maybe it's a time curse." Said Mable, eating a caramel apple nearby. She held it out to Waddles, who ate some of it. "Waddles, can you say Time Curse?" Waddles oinked and Mable picked him up. "Oh, your face is so fat!" Dipper began pacing.
"Is it possible that the forces of time conspire to undo any new outcomes?" He asked. "No, no, I just need to try again!" Cassie shook her head.
"Wait, did you guys use the time machine?" She asked.
"Uh, no, no!" Said Dipper. "We haven't seen any kind of time machine. Those actually exist?" Cassie rubbed her temples.
"I feel like I should know this, but I have a splitting headache. I can't remember if this is what happens the first time or if it's a subsequent time." Cassie walked away. "I need some headache medicine." Dipper and Mable watched her walk away.
"Didn't Cassie say something about how if we didn't bring her with, she didn't know what would happen to her?" Asked Mable. Dipper sighed.
"Third time's the charm!"
"How hard could it be?" Asked Mable. Dipper pulled out the tape again, and Mable put her hand on it. Dipper released it, and they vanished, Just as a small mob walked past.
"Find the witch!"
Dipper got the thumbs up from Wendy again, and looked at the ball. He tossed it to his left hand before throwing it. It knocked down the bottles, but bounced back and struck Wendy again. Robbie walked up. "Ow! My eye!"
"Hey, you alright?" Asked Robbie.
Mable was in the photo booth taking pictures with Waddles. As she came out, Dipper ran to her, and pulled the tape out again.
Cassie was wandering around aimlessly, trying to get her headache to stop. "I'm losing it." She said. "What is going on?" She fell over as the ripples from Dipper and Mable going back in time hit her.
Dipper swapped places with Wendy before throwing the ball. It knocked over the bottles, bounced off the table, then bounced off one of the prizes before hitting the stand guy, only to hit Wendy again. Robbie walked up. "Ow! My eye!"
"Oh, bad look." He said. Dipper planted his head on the table.
Waddles and Mable were eating a slice of pizza together, each one starting on one end.
Cassie found herself running one of the stands. "What the?" She asked. "Isn't this stand rUn by" Dipper and Mable traveled through time again.
Wendy gave Dipper the thumbs up again, and Dipper paused. "Uh, Wendy, how badly do you want that stuffed animal thing?"
"More than anything in the world, Dipper!" She replied. Dipper sighed.
"Ahkay." He threw the ball and it bounced off the table, hitting the bag of baseballs above and ripping it apart, sending a small avalanche at Wendy, knocking her over.
"Ow!" Robbie helped her up, and shook his head at Dipper.
Mable was riding the Ferris wheel with Waddles. "I love my pig!"
Cassie attempted to open a Dimensional Gate to get herself back to the fair, but it didn't appear. "Huh?" She asked as Dipper and Mable again went through time.
Dipper was using a dry erase marker on a popcorn machine to calculate everything he had seen before. "Adjust ball for wind speed. Factor in cotton candy." He muttered to himself.
"Face it Dipper, you've obviously fated to have a bad day at the fair." Said Mable. "Just like I'm fated to be with Waddles!" She held up her pig sweatshirt.
"It's like there's one variable missing." Said Dipper. Mable came up on the other side of the machine, landing right next to the equals sign Dipper had just drawn.
"What's a variable?" Dipper's eyes widened.
"Ah! That's it! I figured out a way to win the toss, not hit Wendy, and stop Wendy and Robbie from going out!"
"Awesome! I'm going to go win my pig again!" Mable started walking off, but Dipper grabbed her arm.
"Whoa whoa whoa! You can't leave! I need you for my plan!"
"But, what about Waddles?"
"It'll just take a few minuteS, let's go!" Dipper pulled her with. Cassie walked up to the popcorn machine, dressed up like a clown.
"I do not know what's going on today." She said to herself. "But I know for a fact that the fair is when Dipper and Mable meet Blendin. I just can't remember where!"
Dipper prepared to throw again. He blew on the ball to knock the dust off, then licked his finger and held it up to measure the wind speed. He looked around to make sure everything was in place. "Are you gonna go man?" Asked Wendy. Dipper smiled.
"And a one and a two and a uh!" He threw the ball up, well above the tenT.
"Ah, dude, you missed."
"Did I?" Asked Dipper. The ball hit the flag on a nearby tent and rolled off, hitting a bump. It knocked into the corn dogs sign, changing its angle slightly and slowing it down. It landed on the Shack's roof and started rolling, being launched up as Mable angled up the gutter. It crashed into Stan's dunk tank target, hitting it dead center, but not dunking him.
"Oh." Complained the crowd around him.
"Haha!" Yelled Stan. The ball crashed through some guy's pizza, then through Robbie's snow cone. Dipper and Wendy both jumped out of the way as the ball raced towards them, knocking the bottles over and bouncing straight up, ripping through the tent. They both looked over the counter as the guy walked up.
"One stuffed creature of indeterminate species, miss." Wendy grabbed it and hugged it.
"Oh! Awesome!" Dipper took off his hat and held it out, catching the ball. Robbie walked up.
"There you are, Wendy!" He said.
"Hi Robbie."
"So, I was wondering if, uh, you, uh" Wendy heLd out her prize.
"Look what Dipper got for me!" She smiled, and Robbie saw Dipper come out from behind her and smile.
"Psh, whatever." Robbie pulled his hood up. "Can't even tell what species it is. It's stupid." He closed his hood quickly, leaving only his nose out, and walked away.
"What's his deal?" Asked Wendy. "Looks like I came to the fair with the right guy!" Dipper beamed as someone rang a bell nearby.
"We have a winner!" Dipper turned to Mable as she walked up. They smiled at each other.
"Any time, broseph." Dipper and Wendy walked away as Mable started towards the pig stand. "Now to win my pig." She gasped.
"It's all yours. No one else's. Ol' fifteen poundie, yours, forever!" The guy handed Waddles to PacifIca, who put him down and pulled a rope that was around his neck. Waddles resisted, but Pacifica kept pulling.
"No!" Yelled Mable. She ran to find Dipper, who just came out of the Tunnel of Love and Corndogs with Wendy, laughing.
"That was even more awesome the third time around!" Said Wendy. She pointed at a stand and gasped. "Funnel CaKe! Let's go get some, Dipper!" She ran off as Dipper jumped off the ride, holding the time machine. He heard Mable yelling as she ran closer.
"Ooooooooooooooooooooooooo" she continued yelling as she ran up to Dipper. He turned to her quickly.
"What's wr"
"Ah!" Mable yelled.
"MablE, wha"
"Ah!"
"I'll just wait until you're done."
"I'm done."
"Okay, what is wrong?"
"We messed up the timeline! Pacifica saw the flyer and won Waddles before I did! She took Waddles, Dipper!"
"Oh, Mable, I'm sorry." Said Dipper. Mable took a deep breath.
"It's okay. We just need to go back and do things differently." She grabbed the Time Machine. Dipper gasped, and grabbed it back.
"Mable! Wait! Look, I did the math, in any other timeline, Wendy ends up going out with Robbie. I can't mess this day up again!"
"But if we don't go, then I'll lose Waddles forever!" Cassie ran up, hearing the commotion. The twins fought over the Time Machine, pulling at it.
"Hey!" Said Dipper.
"Give it back!" Said Mable. The Time Machine ended up getting thrown out and landing in a passing cart for the ride. It pulled out an egregious amount before snapping back. Cassie ran up and put her hand on Dipper's back.
"You're not going without me!" She said. Dipper looked at her.
"Huh?" The Time Machine reeled all the way back, transporting all three back in time over a century. Dipper and Mable picked themselves up. "When are we?"
"The real question is When are we?" Said Mable. "Oh wait, did you already"
"Yeah, I already, yeah, same thing." The two regained their bearings as Cassie picker herself back up, back to normal.
"Ugh, my head." She complained. "What just happened?" Some rumbling began nearby.
"Do you hear that?" Asked Dipper. Cassie slowly got up.
"We need to move!" She said. Dipper and Mable looked back to see some charging animals, covering the entire dirt road. They screamed as the herd approached before they started running. Cassie considered her options, before following them. "Let's go!" She slung Dipper over her back and grabbed Mable, piCking up her pace. She looked forward.
"Look out!" Called Dipper.
"A cliff!" Yelled Mable.
"We're going over!" Replied Cassie, jumping off. The twins screamed on the way down. Within moments, they ripped tHrough the top of a caravan and landed on sacks of flour. The two looked around for a moment.
"Be on the lookout for Mountain Lions, travellers!" They heard.
"Dysentery, who wants dysentery?"
"Forge ahead, mighty oxen! For a new life awaits us on this, Oregon Trail!"
"Wh-where are we?" Asked Mable. "The seventies?"
"You sent us back over a hundred and fifty years, genius! Pioneer times!"
"By Trembly! Fertilia! It seems you've given birth to three more children!" The three looked at the guy driving the wagon.
"It appears I have." Said a woman. The group turned to her. "More little hands to rendeR the tallow." Mable gave a nervous laugh.
"Tallow? What?"
"Her mouth is filled with silver, mother." Said a boy.
"These are called braces." Said Mable. Cassie pulled her and Dipper back.
"No, bad Mable!" Said Cassie. "Meddling with time is never good!" She held her head again. "Ugh, my head. Just how many times did you guys go back through the day?"
"Too many." Said Dipper. He turned to Mable. "She's right, you know. We can't start messing with the past!"
"Oh, says the guy who messed with the past all day and cost me my pig?" Mable pulled out a calculator. "I'll mess with whatever I want!" She handed it to the kid. "Check it out! A magic button machine!" The kid looked it over. "Shoes that blink!" Mable stomped her foot, making it light up, and drawing the attention of everybody else in the wagon.
"Whoa!" The boy pressed a few buttons on the calculatOr, and Dipper took it form him.
"Hey sister, guess who gets to vote in the future?" Said Mable. "Ladies! Up top!" She held her hand up, and the woman tapped it with hers. "That's called a high-five. Teach it to your friends!" Dipper grabbed the Time Machine from her.
"Give me that! I'm going to set the timeline right!" He pulled out the tape quickly, not giving Mable a chance to respond.
"Hey! No!" She grabbed onto Dipper as the tape reeled back. Cassie grabbed on in just the nick of time as they all vanished.
The group reappeared under a t-rex, who growled at them before roaring. Mable grabbed the Time Machine and began pressing a button on it, getting them out of there just before the t-rex bit down on them.
The group reappeared on a paved path, and Dipper and Mable sighed in relief. Cassie tackled them out of the way as a laser melted the grouNd near them. "Run! Take cover!" Yelled someone, firing a blaster.
"Take cover! It's coming!" A giant floating baby floated by, firing lasers out of its eyes before laughing.
"This future seems neat." Said Mable. Dipper grabbed the Time Machine and pressed the button, getting them out of there.
They reappeared at the beach during the fishing day that Stan had brought them to. Mable grabbed the Time Machine and ran off. "I'm coming Waddles!" Dipper ran after her.
"Hey!" He dropped the calculator as he ran. Cassie ran after them.
"We need to stay together!" She called. Cassie from the past looked at her.
"Well, guess they're still travelling." Said past Cassie.
"I seen it! I seen it again!" Yelled McGucket.
The grOup travelled to Stan's unveiling of his wax statue. "But enough about me. Behold, me!" Stan yanked the tarp off of his wax statue as Dipper and Mable ran past, behind everybody. Dipper tripped on the wire coming from the mic, losing his shoe. Cassie from the past saw them again as Cassie ran to catch them.
"Jeez, they really did visit all the past major events, didn't they?" She asked herself.
The group appeared when the gnomes were attacking the Shack. Mable lost her hairpin as she ran, still being chased. Past Cassie watched them go. "Guess they met Blandin." She said to herself.
The group travelled to the Shack in winter, before it was the Mystery Shack. "This thing is getting hotter!" Said Mable. She bounced it from hand to hand. "Hot! Hot hot hot!" She stopped running as it started whining, allowing Dipper and Cassie to catch up easily.
"What did you do?" Asked Dipper.
"I don't know!"
"You overused it!" Said Cassie. "Cover your eyes!" She closed hers and put her hands over theirs as the Time Machine overloaded. They vanished as a light came on in the Shack. Someone opened the door and looked outside, then closed the door.
The group reappeared in darkness, not seeing anythinG. "Where are we?" Asked Mable.
"There's nothing but inky blackness for miles." Said Dipper. "Mable, don't you see? We've transported to the end of time!"
"Wah!"
"Ah!"
"Wah!"
"Gah!"
"Wah!" Screamed Mable. "WaIt, why does it smell so bad in here?" Cassie facepalmed, then opened the porta potty's door.
"We did not travel to the end of time. We're back where we left. Now, get out." Cassie pushed the two out the door, then followed behind them, closing it behind her. "Don't you ever do that again!" She warned them. "My head is going to hurt for a week as I figure out what each version of myself did while you two were messing with time." Cassie walked off.
"Look!" Said Mable. "Cassie was right! We're back in the present!"
"But which present?" Asked Dipper. He saw Robbie walking around with his hood drawn closed, and Wendy with the prize.
"This is the best present ever." She said.
"Yes!" Said Dipper. Mable noticed Pacifica and Waddles.
"No!" She reached out for the Time Machine. "Give me that thing!" The two began running around the porta potty, fighting over the Time Machine. "Give it back!" Dipper climbed on top of the porta potty, leaving Mable to run around the bottom by herself.
"Look, Mable, it's over, okay! Give it up! I've worked too hard to lose this!"
"But what about Waddles?" Asked Mable. "He was my soul mate!"
"You said that about a ball of yarn once! Do you really want Wendy to date Robbie?" Mable's eyes were tearing up.
"I don't know." She looked back down, then pulled out the pictures she had taken a few jumps ago. She looked over them, then hung her head. She walked over to the totem pole and began hitting her head on it.
"You're not guilt tripping me Mable, not this time!" Mable kept hitting the totem pole. Dipper climbed down and walked up to her. "Come on Mable. I know you. You're going to forget about this in a day." He looked at the Time Machine. "Here, hey! I'll prove it!" Dipper pulled the tape out a bit, and transported. He reappeared a day later. "See?" Mable was still banging her head against the totem pole as the fair was being packed up. Cassie walked up.
"Are you sure she'll forget about it?" She asked. She held her head. "I really hope this doesn't break my brain."
"Okay, maybe you'll forget in a week." Said Dipper. He pulled the tape out agAin.
"Be careful, okay?" Asked Cassie. "You may not know her as well as you think you do." Dipper released the tape and transported. He reappeared a week later, to see Mable still banging her head. "A month. She'll be better in a month." He pulled the tape again and transported another month ahead, to see Mable still banging her head and wrapped in vines.
"Waddles." She said, banging her head again. "Waddles." Soos walked up with a group of people.
"And if you look to your left, you'll see Miserable Mable, the girl who went bonkers after her dreams were shattered by some heartless jerk. Oh, hey Dipper!" Dipper watched Mable continue to bang her head against the totem pole as Cassie walked up, with some food and water in her hands. She looked at him.
"In this timeline, she never gets over it." Said Cassie, grabbing the water. "I've been taking care of her ever since she started." She held up the water to Mable, who began drinking it as she continued to bang her head. "No matter what I say, she won't stop." Cassie turned to Dipper again. "I need to leave this place at some point, and I can't take care of her forever. She won't leave either. Put two and two together, Dipper." He sighed, and looked at the Time Machine. He pulled out the tape. "You know what to do." Dipper released the tape and transported back.
Dipper and Wendy walked up to the stand. "I don't know if it's a duck or a panda, but I want one." Said Wendy. Dipper, frowned, and looked down a bit before looking at Wendy. He sighed.
"Wendy, I just wanted to say, that, well, I just wanted to say that people make mistakes. And when they do, you should forgive them. And also that tight pants are overrated."
"Dude, you lost me." Said Wendy.
"I know." Said Dipper. He turned back to the stand. "One ball please." He traded in his ticket.
"You only get one chance." He looked at Wendy, who gave him a thumbs up.
"And a one and a two and a huh." Said Dipper, unenthusiastic as he threw the ball. It hit the table and bounced back at Wendy, hitting her in the eye.
"Ow! My eye!" Robbie walked up.
"Hey Wendy, are you okay?" He pulled her with him a bit. "You know, this is the perfect time for me to ask you something, uh" Dipper looked up as they left.
"It is done." He said. He was suddenly tackled by Mable.
"Dipper! Thank you thank you thank you thank you!" Mable hugged him and lifted his up, shaking him about. Waddles oinked. "He's saying thank you in pig!" Mable put Dipper down. "Aren't you Waddles?" Waddles flopped onto his back. Dipper took notice of Pacifica being pecked by a chicken nearby.
"Ow, ow, ow, ow," he turned back to Mable.
"I couldn't break your heart, Mable. Besides, there's no way Mable can date Robbie all summer, right?" Someone grabbed the Time Machine from Dipper.
"You two!" Yelled Blandin
"Ah!" Yelled Dipper and Mable. Mable grabbed Waddles, who oinked.
"Do you have any idea how many rules you just broke?!" Asked Blendin. "I'm asking. I wasn't there with you. It was probably a lot, right?" Cassie walked up.
"Blendin, if I were you, I'd start running now." She warned.
"What?" Two guys appeared on either side of Blendin, and one of them took the Time Machine.
"Blendin Blandin."
"Ah!" Said Blendin, looking between the two. "The Time Paradox Avoidment Enforcement Squadron!"
"That's right! And our phones have been ringing off the hook! There's settlers high-fiving in the 1800s, and calculators littered through eight centuries!"
"You are under arrest for violations of the Time Traveller's code of conduct."
"I-it was those kids! And their leader, Waddles!" Defended Blendin.
"That's a pig, Blendin." The two began to drag Blendin away.
"Ah, I'll get you for this! I, I'll go back in time and make sure your parents never meet!" Dipper looked at himself.
"Well, we're still here."
"I guess he forgot to go back." Agreed Mable.
"It's not him being forgetful." Foreshadowed Cassie. "It's him needing a way to do so without creating a paradox."
The two guys continued to drag Blendin, going past the dunk tank. "Ha!" Shouted Stan through a megaphone. "You suckers! Your pockets are empty and I'm still sitting high and dry!"
"Boo!" Shouted the crowd. Stan laughed.
"Yeah! Boo! Boo! I love it!" He pointed out. "Hey biceps!" He called out, pointing at one of the people dragging Blendin. They stopped. "Yeah, I'm talking to you, haircut!" The two stared at Stan. "Take your best shot!" One of them pulled out his ray gun and fired, breaking the target and board and sending Stan into the tank. The crowd laughed and cheered. The two carrying Blendin pressed buttons on their clothes, transporting away.
Dipper took a bit out of his snow cone. "So, I guess we never found out who was causing those Time Anomalies Blendin was looking for." Said Mable. Dipper stopped walking and Mable looked at him.
"Wait, Mable, I think it was us."
"Ugh, my brain hurts." Said Mable.
"Aw jeez, I gotta deal with this all summer?" Asked Dipper, pointing. Mable turned to see Wendy and Robbie.
"Heh heh, it's good. It's caramel." Wendy took a bit out of Robbie's caramel apple. Mable put Waddles down.
"I'm on it." She patted him a bit, and Waddles took quick notice of Robbie's caramel apple. He charged at Robbie, squealing as he did so. Robbie yelled and ran, dropping his caramel apple. Waddles stopped at it and began eating it. Robbie backed into a pot of hot water, knocking it over and drenching himself.
"My pants! They're shrinking!" They squeezed his legs, cutting off circulation. A small crowd gathered around him, laughing. Dipper, Mable, and Wendy all laughed at him too. Mable pet Waddles a bit. Stan started laughing while in the water, inhaling some.
"Oh man." Said Wendy. Dipper looked at Waddles.
"That'll do pig." Waddled oinked. "That'll do." Cassie ran up, with some scissors.
"Everybody, clear out!" She said. Everyone looked at her. "When I cut those pants, it'll become a ballistic missile! Clear!" She ran up to Robbie. "Hold still please.
"What are you" Cassie made a tiny cut on Robbie's pants, and they shredded completely, several chunks flying away at hypersonic speeds. Cassie held out a new pair of pants for him.
"Be careful next time, and don't wear cotton, okay?" Robbie grabbed the pants and ran away, embarrassed.
Look back in time, find the clues. LiNe them up, and see crazy views.