Chapter 7
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The sunlight warmed my face as I began to stir awake.
My back felt super stiff but I felt happy... peacefully keeping my eyes closed until I registered a body laying behind me.
With a gasp, I lurched into a sit up and looked around, deeply confused as to why I was lying beside a sleeping Draco at the top of the Astronomy tower and not in my curtained bed in the dormitory.
With another small gasp and a drop of my jaw, the night came rushing back to me and I blushed, getting up and pacing back and forth, trying to be as quiet as possible to not wake him up.
I was very much not ready to face what we did yet...
The cool morning air made me shiver, even through my clothes I had put back on before falling asleep in his arms...
Draco seemed so peaceful, a small smile gracing his lips.
If only he was always like that...
I feared what he would be like when he woke up...
I walked towards the railing to look out over the grounds to clear my head, but as I touched it, I hissed and pulled my hand back.
It was so cold! Beyond freezing!
I winced at the now torn skin of my palm, looking between it and the railing.
"What the hell..." I breathed, gently reaching out to poke the rail and my fingertip stuck to it before I ripped my hand away with another hiss.
That wasn't just cold... there was something else there too, just like on the train a week ago!
A powerful magical force that made something within me tremble in a mixture of fear and excitement, but I couldn't tell why for the life of me...
I looked back over to Draco to see if he was still sleeping and frowned.
There was too much going on right now for me to deal with...
I hoped he wouldn't remember last night or that at least he wouldn't hate me for disappearing as I snuck away down the stairs.
I ended up turning away from the common room entry hall as I reached it, feeling the need to keep moving, too restless and uneasy to go inside just yet... or to answer to Pansy...
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My feet took me back to the bridge Draco had fallen from and I hesitantly crossed to the middle of it, leaning on the barrier to pause for a moment and close my eyes, wondering why I decided to torture myself by returning...
Flashes of my transformation appeared at my eyelids in a jarring manner, full of screams and red.
"That's not what happened this time..." I tried to reason with the distorted memories as they showed me a warped version- Draco screaming at me as I dived after him, snagging him in my jaws and more screaming...more red...
"No that's not right... I caught him... he didn't scream... that's not right..."
I could see the little girl I burned talking in my flashes now, unintelligible, but distinctly her.
My palms began to sweat in my tight grip of the bridge and my voice trembled.
"That was another time... I was seven... I was sorry... I still am...!"
"You... killed me... the monster in you killed me..." I heard her whisper and I felt my strength fail me, collapsing on the bridge and covering my ears with my hands.
"I'm sorry...!" I choked out, hearing the crackle of fire and screams.
"You're a murder. A beast. You're evil."
"It wasn't me!" I screamed out and the sounds silenced- the flashes halted.
My shuddering breaths were all I could hear now and I let my hands drop from my ears and cried freely.
"Are you alright?"
I snapped my eyes open at the sound of a light and airy voice to see a girl standing on the bridge with bright white hair and a distant look on her pixie like features.
"You seem distressed." She said, as if making a curious observation rather than a question directed to my well being.
I opened my mouth to explain myself but couldn't find any words. The only sound that came from my lips was a small hiccup and a choked back sniffle.
"I was on my way to the forest for some reading. Would like to go with me?" Her eyes finally seemed to focus on my face and she delicately held out a hand to me.
"Might clear your mind. It does wonders for me. I'm Luna."
I hadn't seen her in Slytherin before and eyed her suspiciously.
Did she know I was a Slytherin?
Was she a Griffendor plotting to take advantage out of what they just saw and hurt me?
I scowled at my knees and after a few attempts, found my voice.
"What... what house are you?"
He hand stayed perfectly outstretched as she seemed to grow distant again.
"Ravenclaw. Not that that matters for a walk on a Sunday morning?" She seemed to puzzle over it, seeming to really wonder the deeper meaning before her eyes refocused on me.
With a long exhale, I took her hand to stand up.
"I'm..." I tried to find another name- any name but the one to tie me to this breakdown.
"Alura. Isn't it?" She answered for me and my stomach dropped.
"How do you know my name?" I stared at her and she tilted her head.
"You were sorted separately. I remember odd events well." She replied, turning to finish crossing the bridge.
"Oh... right." I said quietly and followed her.
We walked for quite a while through the trees until we reached a clearing.
She was a very quiet person and let me have my thoughts to myself as I tried to calm down, for which I was very thankful for.
I let her act as my silent guide as I took in the mysterious beauty of what I assumed was the forbidden forest.
"All sorts of creatures live here." Luna called over to me softly, reaching into her bag.
I turned my attention to her as she pulled out something red and slimy... was that meat?
"I like to come here and be with them sometimes to get away from my own head..." she held out the meat and my jaw dropped as a bone like horse proudly stepped towards her to take it.
"Is that a... real thestral?" I asked, my mouth open in shock.
There was just the one in the clearing and it lifted its head to eye me as I spoke.
"You can see them too?" Luna said with a sad smile and I nodded. She lifted her hand to give the beast a gentle stroke along its snout as it chewed.
"They can only be seen by people who have seen death... my mother passed when I was young, but old enough to know what had happened..." she explained and I frowned.
"I'm sorry you lost her..." I swallowed back my bile as the creature continued to stare at me.
I stayed silent, not daring to tell her who I saw die and Luna nodded but didn't speak again, instead moving over to a large curved root that protruded from the earth and sat down on it, pulling a small book from her bag.
After a minute passed in silence I moved to sit against a trunk of a tree a few meters from her.
Our silence welcomed a small gathering of thestrals to enjoy the sunbeams that came through the trees in the clearing.
The occasional squirrel darted among the trees, shaking the branches above, but neither me, Luna or the Thestrals gave them any notice.
It felt like an hour had passed by the time Lunas voice startled me.
"I think breakfast will be opening soon. I hope there's toast and jam." She put away her book and slid off the root to her feet.
I stood up slowly, letting my legs wake back up and the thestrals began to move away from the cleaning now due to our movement.
I put my hand on the tree to adjust my shoe and winced, feeling the rough bark scratch against the torn skin from the tower railing, pulling it back to look at it.
It was like a burn with no blistering and it felt so sore.
I wondered if Pansys cream would make it go away like it did for my chin...
but there was something odd about this wound.
I didn't just trip and scrape it open, something magical froze and burnt me at the same time...
Luna leaned over my shoulder to see what I was looking at.
"Oh, that looks nasty. Have you been to Madame Pompfrey?"
I quickly shoved my hand in my jean pocket, hiding my pained wince at how I had to squeeze my palm to fit it in.
"I'll go later today... it's just a burn."
She nodded, not pressing the matter any further and led me out of the winding path of the forest and back to the bridge.
I noticed she didn't ask questions and although she felt strange, she gave off an odd sense of ease to be around.
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As we could see the Great Hall doors I gently tapped her on the shoulder.
She turned around with a distant faint smile.
"Luna... you're a very nice person. Thank you."
She opened her mouth to speak but I just gave her a small thankful nod and walked into the Hall.
It was the least I could say, but I didn't have any more left in me...
My eyes locked with Pansy almost the second I passed the doorway and she raced out of her seat towards me.
"And where exactly have you been all night young lady?" She whisper hissed at me, grabbing my arm and dragging me back to her seat.
I stuttered and avoided her angry mother-like scowl.
"I stayed up and went out for a walk early..." I explained quietly. It wasn't a lie so it didn't come off as one, or so I hoped.
She heaved a loud sigh and began to lecture me about worrying her but her eyes turned to the other side of the table as Draco sat down directly in front of me, staring.
I quickly looked away before I could see his expression and focused back on Pansys rant.
She paused to say good morning to Draco and take a bite out of her toast.
"Good morning Pansy... Alura." He said my name in sharp way.
Not in a hateful or teasing way... but... pointed...
I nodded and mumbled a good morning back.
Ugh... why did he have to sit here?!
I wasn't ready to talk to him... especially not in such a public place!
I could see him from my peripherals trying to get me to make eye contact with him but I refused, choosing to listen to Pansy telling me how 'irresponsible' and 'worrying' I had been.
I felt a foot nudge my own under the table and ignored it.
Another nudge.
And another.
Then a kick to my shin.
"Ow!" I growled, finally looking across the table at him.
He nodded his head towards the door and got up, leaving the Hall.
Pansy went silent before grabbing my arm, shaking me back and forth a little.
"Excuse me, what was that?"
I gave her a wide eyed shrug and she pushed my shoulder.
"Maybe he likes you..." she smirked in a teasing sing song voice.
I looked to her in horror and she laughed.
"It's okay if he does... just if you two get together... put in a good word to Blaise about me..." she said dreamily and I shook my head.
"Pansy... that is not gonna happen... Draco and I... we had a... disagreement... that's probably what he wants to yell at me about..." I stuttered through my awful excuse and she rolled her eyes.
"Oh come off it. I've seen the way he looked at you from day one. Go get some Malfoy dick!" She laughed and I blushed a deep crimson, begging her to at least keep her voice down.
If only she really knew what was spinning around in my head... what Draco really knew about me... what we did last night...
She rolled her eyes and shoved me to my feet.
"Stop being so oblivious! Go!"
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I began to slowly walk towards the door like I was waking to my own execution, which would be far more preferable at this moment in time...
The second I walked through, I felt a hand grab my arm and yank me along with them.
I looked to the owner and was not surprised to see Draco dragging me down the hall.
"I can walk just fine on my own..." I grumbled but his grip just tightened.
I frowned and tried to pry his fingers from my upper arm.
"Draco you're hurting me."
"Good."
He looked around before opening a broom closet and throwing me inside, closing the door behind him and muttering 'lumos' to light the darkness.
"What the hell was that?" I growled, rubbing my arm painfully.
He narrowed his eyes and glared at me.
"Me? What was that with you?" He hissed and I looked away in shame.
"I... don't know what you're talking about, Drac-" he grabbed my chin, pulling my head round to look him in the eye.
"Why are you being like this?" He scowled, lowering his wand to move the light away from our faces.
I searched for the best words to explain how I felt without sounding stupid.
I settled on-
"I don't know how I feel about what we did."
There was a long pause before he spoke.
"About the transformation or... afterwards?"
"Both..." I quickly replied, looking away from him by lowering my eyes before meeting his again with obvious pain.
"You pushed me into doing something I never wanted to do again... and I rewarded you for it... I hate myself for everything that happened last night."
His expression dropped from anger to a strange sadness.
"I thought you were grateful..."
"I was... at the time... but..." I took a breath to steady my voice.
"Draco, I did something terrible as that dragon... I will never be able to forget it. Or forgive myself for it. Nothing will ever truly change how I feel about that part of myself. Ever."
He stayed quiet and I dared to continue.
"You know something that could destroy me if you were to tell anyone. I don't know why I dared to tell you in the first place... let alone allow you to goad me into actually showing you! Damn you..." I hissed, wiping away a tear that began to build in the corner of my eye.
"Damn you Draco Malfoy. You're a stupid boy I've barely known for a week. What possessed me to grant you so much power over me?" I said, more angrily towards myself, digging my nails into my palm and crying out as I pulled my frost burnt hand towards my chest.
Draco tilted his head with a frown and grabbed my wrist with a soft grip, lifting his wand to look at my hand.
His eyes widened curiously before moving to look at my face.
"How did you get that?"
His grip on my wrist grew tighter as he stared intensely, waiting for an answer and I leaned away from him, oddly terrified by his reaction.
"T-the astronomy tower... I touched the rail and..."
"And it froze to your skin...?"
This time my eyes widened curiously and I slowly nodded.
"I felt the same cold before... back on the train..."
"Just before we met? Before I came into your compartment?"
I gulped, a feeling of unease and anxious excitement filling me as I nodded again. How the hell did he know?
He stared at me wordlessly, his lips parted in shock.
He slowly turned his palm upright, showing me a similar wound and I gulped again.
With his other hand he gently touched my face.
"We need to talk to Snape. Now."
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A/N: I May gloss over things at first... but trust me when I say they have meaning XD
Review? :3
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