With a deep breath, Ren gathered all the strength he could muster. Physically and mentally. This was it. She had denied him and now... now they would fight in a battle to the death. But he didn't want to fight her. He couldn't. Kylo had tried to deny the growing feelings he'd been harboring for this scavenger over the past several months, but they would not easily be forgotten. They could not easily be forgotten. In fact, he'd given up all hope in trying.
The pull to the light had been strong even before he'd met her. His family had drawn him closer and closer in every attempt to bring him back to the light. Hey were succeeding. He'd been only on the edge of darkness when he'd killed his father. It was that act that he'd thought would be his final act. But instead of making him feel complete in his journey to the dark side it had only filled him with confusion and grief. He was torn between good and evil. Light and dark. Then to complete his inability to defend his choice, he met her. The girl. A scavenger. Nothing. Everything. Rey.
He had no family left to return to. His mother would not have him, his father was dead by his own doing, and his uncle was no where to be seen, supposedly dead. Ren had had no meaning in life since he joined the First Order. Snoke had been a manipulator and a poor excuse for a leader, Phasma, the only one who had been merely good to him, was dead, and Hux wanted to see him dead. So what other choice did he have?
"The only way your getting to Exegol... it with me. Kylo Ren said with finality as he crushed the wayfinder and it shattered in his palm. Her lightsaber flared with life and she cried out. "No!" Her scream sounded like a shriek. She stared at him with growing hatred and anger as he dropped the broken pieces. He had fed fuel to the fire and now he had to watch it grow. She would destroy him. But it was at this point, that he didn't care whether she would be the death of him or not. If he could not have her, if she would not join him, then the power would be meaningless.
Kylo dodged her incoming attack and sidestepped to avoid being cut in half or loosing a limb like his uncle and grandfather had. He knew she was capable and at this point... willing. Her anger grew as she swung her ignited saber at him furiously, he continued to swerve out of the way. Kylo wouldn't use his own saber until necessary. Her strikes were ill timed and not thought through, only surged from anger so it made it easy to avoid them.
As her saber came down towards his chest, Kylo threw his shoulders back and beefed out of the way. She had blocked his mind from entering hers, but even then he could feel her hatred burning and pulsing through their bond. She wasn't just mad, she was blinded by pure, raw anger. It flowed through her veins, the electricity was pumping through her blood as her anger fueled her power.
Don't make me do this. He thought to himself as avoided her swings. Rey. He tried to speak to her through their bond but she could not hear. He couldn't sense anything of her mind. Red, hot anger overrode everything else. She struck once more and he could no longer avoid her incoming attacks. Kylo sighed and ignited his saber. It blared to life, fizzling and cracking as only a damaged saber could do and he raised it. The two sabers collided, energy pulsing through their use of the Force, giving their lightsabers the impact to kill.
He blocked her incoming swing and exhaled. He knew this battle was already determined. He refused to kill her and he could see that she would not hesitate this time to destroy him. He feared what hatred she harbored for not only him, but for herself. Ever since she had found out her birthright, anger had been fueling her, growing from within her. She hated her own being and the power that flowed within her. He hadn't wanted it to be like this. Kylo had wanted her to embrace her power. He wanted to help her to do that. He wanted her to join him so that he could teach her how to properly use her power.
Kylo heard a voice call out and saw Finn, Rey's friend, coming towards them. What did that traitor think he was going to do? He could not help her. He couldn't use the force. He hadn't trained to be a Jedi. This battle was between Kylo and Rey. They were Force users he was not. He would be helpless. Kylo despised the traitor. Not only did he betray the First Order, but he was part of the reason Rey would not turn. He held her back and for that Ren hated him.
With a slight gasp, mostly for the intake of oxygen, Kylo blocked more attacks from Rey. The traitor called out to Rey and her eyes widened. But she seemed to agree with Ren about the fact that the traitor should not interfere. Because in between strikes, she spun around and shouted, then thrust her hand forward. "No!" She screamed, and using the Force, she pushed the traitor back and he was thrown across the Death Stars remains. Kylo was impressed. She didn't even seem concerned that she had just possibly harmed her friend. Her raw anger was blinding her.
Then, she turned her attention back to Kylo. She would not be distracted. She had a goal. To take revenge. Rey wanted to kill Palpatine and Ren had just taken away her chance to find him. So now she would take out her fury on him. She jumped forward, striking again and he avoided her saber once more. Their sabers clashed, sparking and crackling sounds bounding off of each collision.
Suddenly, there an eruption and Rey gasped, staring behind him. Her expression was grave and she breathed rapidly. Kylo turned away from her and look behind him. A tidal wave was gathering height and was about to crash down on them. Rey gasped and moved her hands in a circular motion, pushing the end of his saber to the ground. She gave him a slight smirk then spun around and ran off the end of the piece of ship remains they were standing on. Kylo sighed and followed after, using the Force as leverage to jump across the DeathStar remains.
When he landed, Rey spun around to face him. The battle raged on with many more attacks. The clash of sabers rang through the sea, echoing off the waves. Kylo made every attempt to use his lightsaber only to block her saber, he only swung at her when he knew she would be able to block. He had to attack every once in a while to keep her busy so that she could not strike him down.
Thrusting his saber forward he aimed it at her shoulder like a hot-poker as she had done to him many years ago during their first duel. As he had expected, she blocked his oncoming attack and pushed his saber into the ship they stood on. His saber cut through the metal like a knife through butter.
Then, pulling her lightsaber away, Rey jumped into a backflip as a wave washed over them. She missed the majority of the wave but Kylo was too slow and it crashed over him. He groaned as the water soaked him to the bone. Kylo took a deep breath and stepped forward, approaching her. He could see the madness that was still raging in her eyes.
Rotating his lightsaber do that he was holding it backwards, Kylo attacked. He swung forward, knowing she would block him then spun around. She held up a hand, holding his lightsaber in place with the Force. He pulled back and she retaliated by swinging at him when he was not prepared to block. Kylo lifted his hand and used the Force to stop the blow. He focused on immobilizing not only her saber, but her arm too, so that she could not use the Force to pull back.
It didn't take long for her to escape his hold and bringing her saber around to his chest. Their lightsabers clashed again and she brought it downwards, trying to cut his hand but the double sided blades of his lightsaber kept hers from hitting his hand. Instead, she burnt her finger and drew away, flicking her wrist. She recovered quickly though and swung at him again.
With a low growl he spun out of the way of her blade. When would this madness end? He didn't want to fight her but he would if it meant not dying. He could let her kill him and he wouldn't kill her. So until she lost the uncontrollable anger in her eyes he would have to continue to fight her.
Seeing his opportunity, Ren brought his saber against hers, locking them in a hold together, then lifted his lightsaber above his head. Her saber had no choice but to follow, twisting her wrist in the process. She let out a small cry and he spun back around, releasing his hold on her lightsaber. He took deep and ragged breaths as he began to attack her venomously. Striking again and again until she fell down on her knees. He stopped momentarily until she tried once again to strike him.
Then, he brought his saber down in anger and she fell backwards. He lifted his lightsaber to strike her down but she let out a small cry and he stopped, realizing what he was doing. The fear was evident on her face by that wasn't the only thing that stopped him. He felt a presence. A strong sensation in the Force caused him to hesitate. When he realized who it was, he wavered and lowered his weapon, extinguishing the blade.
"Ben." His mother's voice whispered softly as if confirming his fears. Ben. He hadn't heard her call him that in a long time. He hadn't heard her voice in a long time. Ben wavered, turning slowly, searching for her. His breathing was ragged and his grip loosened on his extinguished lightsaber. He felt it drop from his grasp as he searched for his mother. Longing to see her one last time, for he could feel her presence waning.
But as fast as he had felt her, she was gone and a cry caused him to spin around. He now faced Rey, who had caught his saber out of midair. She let out a strangled cry and ignited the blade then drove it into his stomach. He gasped as he felt it run him through, struggling to breath as its energy blazed in his abdomen. But the pain was nothing compared to the pain he felt at the loss of his mother. She was gone. She lost herself to reach out to him, one last time. Why would she even try? Ben looked up and met Rey's eyes. Surely she would know. Soon enough she would realize as he had that their beloved Princess Leia was gone.
As if she had read his thoughts, Rey blinked and gasped, looking away from him. "Leia." She uttered with realization. Rey let out a ragged breath. It was as if time stood still. She stared into the empty sea, her expression blank and her eyes filled with unexpected surprise and sorrow. Rey was hardly breathing when she extinguished his lightsaber and blinked.
As soon as the blade left his abdomen, Ben fell to the ground with a thud. He groaned as pain shot through his torso. But it didn't mater anymore, he'd accepted his fate, he had no reason to live. And if Rey was the one who had killed him then it would make it all the more bearable. He deserved what he got and she deserved this victory. After everything he had done to her he was accepting his bitter fate. He had many regrets, but the most vivid regret that weighed on his mind was that he'd not told his mother he loved her. That it was his fault she had passed on in her attempt to save him.
Rey continued to stare into an empty void until his pained breathing caught her attention. She looked down at him and sighed then knelt down beside him. Ben did not meet her eye. He couldn't look at her after what had happened. She was probably ready to finish the job. He knew she loved first Han, then Leia, and now it was his fault that they both were gone. She had every right to kill him, to finish him off.
But as he waited for her to kill him, she raised a hand over the wound where his slightsaber has run him through. He looked over and met her eye and saw something he had not seen in a long while. Compassion. He saw compassion and pain revealed in her hazel eyes, mixed with sorrow. She was confused to say the least but pain tore into her. He could feel it. She was being torn between her fight against the darkness within her. She had succumbed to it when she attacked him and it horrified her.
Ben knew that feeling only too well. He wanted to help her, he wanted to show her the way, but he didn't know how. How could he when he was torn himself, alone, and broken. He had been manipulated and torn between the light and the dark for as long as he could remember. Snoke, Palpatine, Phasma, all of these influences that had told him the dark side was the right side. Ben has made the choice to do those horrible things of his own accord. He could not pass the blame, but he remembered how he had felt. How he still felt. It was the same way Rey was feeling now. Ben didn't know where he stood in all this, so how could he help Rey find her way?
Ben waited for death to take him, regardless of whether or not she was he one to bring it, but it did not come. Instead, he felt warmth. Healing. A heat crept around the pained area and energy once again began to flow through his veins. He gasped several times, trying to keep his intake of air natural as he let her presence flow through him. It was her power that was healing him. She was giving a part of herself to heal him. But why? He didn't deserve this. He deserved to die. So why would she save him? It had been him all along that fought against her, harmed her, manipulated her. Why would she even try to heal him?
When Rey had finished, Ben felt no pain. Only a warm sensation surrounded the wounded area. He looked up and met Rey's eye. "I did want to take you hand." She said with tears in her eyes. "Ben's hand." Rey stood and ran off without looking back. He could hear only parts of her thoughts but so many of his own thoughts ran through his mind that he could not focus. But clear as day Ben heard the voice in her head, forcing her not to look back, for if she looked back, she knew she would stay with him. That she would take his hand no matter what side he fought for. Ben wouldn't let hat happen. He wouldn't let her faith die after all she'd been through to keep it alive. He closed off his mind to her and felt her pain as she ran away. Away from her pain, away from her conviction, away from him.
Ben felt the conflict rise within him once again. He knew where he stood now, but he didn't know if he could at this point. He'd done so many terrible things. How could he fight for good. How could he ask them to accept him? He couldn't. They wouldn't. Anyone from the Resistance would not hesitate to kill him on sight. And he wouldn't blame them. He couldn't return to the First Order. He had no longing or place there as he had thought he had.
Slowly, Ben stood. He still felt sore from where he had been stabbed but the injury no longer remained. So with a jagged breath, he brought himself up to the edge of the broken remains of the once dreaded Death Star and stared out at the ocean. He felt empty. As though he had no purpose in life anymore. He could go after Rey, but she would not have him. He refused to return to the First Order. He refused. So where did that leave him? Ben groaned. Why did Rey have to save him? What did he have left to live for?
"Hey kid." Ben heard an all too familiar voice call from behind. Ben shuddered, trying to block out that voice. It was impossible. Ben turned around, at a loss for words. There he stood. Han Solo. Ben's father. They stared at each other for a few moments in silence before Han let out a low sigh. "I miss you son."
"Your son is dead." Ben took in a deep breath, knowing the lie in his words. The same words he'd spoken to his father just moments before he'd killed him.
Han took a step forward and shook his head. "No." Three more steps, they were face to face now. "Kylo Ren is dead. My son is alive."
"Your just a memory." Ben said, too afraid to hope.
Han gave the slight inclination of a nod. "Your memory." He looked Ben in the eye. "Come home."
"Its too late. She's gone." Ben said, pain throbbing in his heart.
Han took a deep breath. "Your mother is gone. What she stood for, what she fought for, that's not gone." He sighed. "Ben."
"I know what I have to do but I don't know if I have the strength to do it." Ben choked on a sob in between words.
Han stepped forward and placed a hand on Ben's cheek. "You do." He said with certainty.
Ben lifted his saber as he had before but this time Han did not reach out to take it. Ben choked on a sob and stared into the eyes of his father. The man who loved him. "Dad..." He said, his voice wavering as he tried to find a way to tell his father that he loved him and that he was sorry for everything he'd done. For killing him, and being the cause of his mother's death. He wanted to let his father know that he loved him.
Han looked him in the eye, his lips pursed and he nodded. "I know." He said, a looked of understanding in his eyes. Ben spun around and threw the lightsaber as far into the sea as he could. Ben felt a great weight lift of his shoulders. His father knew. He had known all along that Ben loved him, and Ben had, all along.
It was then that he knew where he stood. He loved his mother and he loved his father. And he loved his uncle, even if Luke had tried to kill him when he was young and training. He loved his uncle Lando and Chewy. But most of all, he loved Rey. He loved who she had become. She was not dark and she never would be. Because she was good. And that was why he loved her. That was why he had been drawn to her. She always stood for what she believed in, no matter how easy she could have given in, she never did. He saw now that she had not denied him because she did not care for him. But because she cared too much for what she believed in.
Author's Note:
So this is my first Star Wars fanfic. I've been planning one for a long time but felt that it would be kinda useless once The Rise Of Skywalker came out so I decided to wait. TROS had messed me up and shattered my tiny Reylo heart. So I hope you all enjoy this little fix-it I have sloppily put together. I do plan on making a Reylo series from the beggining of their story but for now this is what I have to do to give myself consolation over my poor Ben Solo's death. Also, this is beautiful, please go watch it if you have not, but if you have been a Reylo an since the start like me then you probably already have. But for the hell of it go and watch it again bc it is beautiful.
youtu.be/KtAdR3JAhxw