"That special..." Sasori muttered as he pointed to the advertisement on the menu board, "Is..."
"Yes?"
"Valentines?"
The barista behind the counter smiled as she put on her customer service facade, "Oh why yes! Our super special today is buy one milk or white hot chocolate, get one free for your valentines sweetheart! Hee hee!"
Sasori blinked slowly as it processed even more. He just waltzed into the coffee shop after a long day of work, ordered a coffee, and now he's being told it's Valentine's Day?
"So... right now...today...is Valentine's Day?"
"Oh? Um, well yes it is sir..." she gestured to the slight theme of the cafe. "Although I guess it's halfway over at this point."
Tapping his debit card to pay, Sasori swiped the coffee and ran to an open table. He wasn't one for sitting in a cafe and working as he could do that at home with less disturbance. However this was an emergency! How could he have forgotten about Valentine's Day? He had spent the day working and of course being the man he is, didn't interact with anybody during that time! How was he supposed to know that this damn holiday crept up on him? It wasn't like anyone approached him with a work friendly gift or anything as a jovial reminder. Oh how would his Valentine, boyfriend, react if he had met up with him and realized only then that he forgotten? The plan was that after the coffee, he was to head over to his boyfriend Deidara's house. He was so close to walking up to deaths door on that one!
"What to do, what to do..." he groaned as he searched online for ideas.
Teddy bears? Oh come on! He was the only teddy Deidara needed. Chocolates? Lazy. Just lazy! A card with a sweet poem? Might as well chop his balls off and give them to the blond in a heart shaped box while he's at it! Actually, giving Deidara his genitals didn't seem like such an awful gift. He seemed to enjoy them for the most part any other time of the year. Although there was a good chance Deidara already took dibs on that gift; and if he didn't get anything for Deidara, it was a gift that could easily be rescinded.
"Hey there Sasori! Weird seeing you...ever." A voiced chimed rudely from behind the redhead.
Sasori glared over his shoulder, "Hello and goodbye, Tobi." He hissed, hardly acknowledging the guy as he one: didn't care for him and two, was far too busy. Instead he got back to looking for ideas.
Unfortunately for Sasori, as being nosey by nature, Tobi looked over his shoulder at what the redhead was sweating bullets over, "Ara ara... don't tell me you forgot it was Valentine's Day!"
"Shut up."
"Ohhh... poor Deidara! Oh no!" Tobi whined, very obvious in an attempt to rub salt in the wound.
"Shut. Up!"
"What about flowers?" Tobi suggested as he noted the list Sasori had made on the back of his receipt, "Artistic and ephemeral! Just the perfect gift for our darling Deidara."
"Our?" Sasori snickered over his shoulder, "Wow Tobi, sure sounds like you've been planning a Valentine's Day with MY Deidara..."
"Of course not. However if I was, I sure wouldn't forget like you certainly did, Sasori!"
"Tsk!"
"Anyway! Bye bye Sasori. Have a wonderful Valentine's Day! Maybe?"
Sasori fumed as he grabbed his phone to call any and every fine dining restaurant in town listed online, of course begging internally at every ring for an open reservation. Without haste, the people on the other end of the phone laughed at him. They've all been booked up for weeks! Of course there were no last minute spots.
Finding very little good ideas online, Sasori quickly made his way to the stores and mall. And boy did he find a whole lotta 'nothin. Seriously, the shelves were bare! There weren't even any of the good chocolates left. Just the cheap stuff and those chalky candy hearts. Even the good teddy bears were all taken. Just the small ones and one regular sized one missing it's eye was all that was left.
"Yikes..."
And it was like this store after store after store.
Looking at a shelf he groaned at the mass produced crap. Deidara didn't need weird cheap, lovey-dovey sculptures. He didn't need a butt shaking Cupid. He didn't need any of this tacky garbage.
"Ten minutes till closing."
Sasori almost dropped the stupid thing he was looking at, "Closing? Now!?" Looking at his phone he paled at how it was now almost ten at night. Not to mention all the worried missed texts and calls from Deidara!
"Oh no, Oh no!"
He didn't mean to press 'ignore' on Deidara that many times! In fact, he was supposed to be over there hours ago!
All that was left was that idiot Tobi's suggestion, flowers. However it didn't seem he was going to be in for much luck this time either. Every florist in town had closed of course. Even with signs up saying they had to unfortunately close early due to 'no stock'.
"How can a florist run out of flowers!" Sasori whined as he dragged his fingers down the window as it started to rain. "All they sell is flowers!"
"Yo man..."
Sasori looked down at the garbage pile beside him that decided to suddenly move, "Huh? Agh! What?"
"Around the corner and down the street... I think that flower place is still open..." spoke a homeless man coming out from his garbage heap. "Yeah... but you shouldn't have waited maaan... your poor Valentine..."
Sasori ignored the subtle scolding of the homless man and tossed him a coin for his advice. Booking it, he ran around the corner and down the street, looking for the so called flower shop that just may save the day.
"Would you look at that..." Sasori gasped as he stood out front of a store, illuminated with a greenish hue. "Flowers- Ah."
Suddenly the lights started to turn off. Looking at his watch he gasped in horror as it turned eleven. "No way... no way!" He roared. Slamming his hands on the widows he yelled, "please! Please open and sell me a flower! Any flower!"
The lights turned back on and a blond woman rushed to the front of the store. Opening the door a crack, "We're closing now!"
"Please! Please even if you just sell me one flower!"
The girl cringed, "listen guy, all we have left is filler. Mostly green filler. Even if I stayed past working hours which were already extended for the holiday, I could only make you a bouquet that looks like crap." She spoke honestly.
"It's okay! I just need something at this point for my boyfriend!"
Groaning at the sight of the soggy desperate man, she reluctantly let him in, "Fine. But just because I don't have anything better to do... unlike some friend of mine going out with that jerk! All that so called , 'love'!"
Jealous much?
"He doesn't deserve her!" The woman hissed as she quickly began tossing up a bouquet with various greens and little flowers, trying to make it as nice as possible, "She needs a girl who would treat her right!"
Sasori scoffed, "I feel the same way. He could do better, especially with me here buying a leftover filler bouquet because... I forgot." he groaned looking at what looked like a salad garnished with a couple actual flowers and baby's breath. She was doing her best with what she had to work with.
"Mm...Does your boyfriend even like flowers?" She asked as she made small talk while she worked away.
"Who knows..." Sasori sighed as he slumped on the counter. Just maybe Deidara would actually like the 'quirky salad' look. Had he even seen the blond eat a salad before?
"Uh-huh, then what does he like?"
"Hmm...Food."
"Did you consider a chocolate box? Or to take him to a nice restaurant?" She asked, giving the obvious suggestions.
"He doesn't like 'cliches' and the restaurants are booked."
"Well aren't flowers not only cliche but also not food?"
Still slumped, Sasori peered out the window and onto the rainy street, illuminated by signs and street lamps, "Yeah...he really does deserve better- wait..." standing up, Sasori stared out the window at the flashing open sign across the street. Mouth gaping and without a word to the girl working, he ran out of the flower store-
"Wait! So you don't want the flowers!?" She yelled to deaf ears as the stores door closed behind him, leaving her in the dust. "Bah! Guys are such pigs."
Sasori stormed into the rinky dinky little restaurant and slammed a twenty on the counter, "large meat lovers pizza, please!"
-x-
Standing outside his boyfriends house, Sasori juggled the items in his arms with a huff as he tried to reach of the door bell to no avail as he was stuck using his head to knock. Water dripped down from moppy red hair and off the tip of his nose. This was not a good look for him.
"Oh. Hello."
Deidara glared at the wet man in front of him, "What the hell, man?"
"Uh, Yeah...I-"
"I've been worried sick! I haven't heard from you all day!" Deidara yelled. Looking down though he sighed with a smile as in one hand was a large pizza and the other a bottle of Pepsi. He rolled his eyes and took the pizza box from the man, "get on in here, Mr. Soggy Pants."
"Thank you." Sasori muttered, embarrassed at this situation. He did look terrible. However as soon as Deidara punched him in the arm he snapped out of it, "Ouch!"
"That's what you get for ignoring my calls! Sheesh, I thought you were dead in a ditch or something, hmph!"
"Well don't punch me- ow!"
"Don't worry me then! I was ready to call for a missing persons, hmph!"
"Yeah, Yeah..."
Sasori put the bottle on the table and quickly undressed while Deidara walked to his room to get a towel and some comfy clothing to change into.
"Here you go."
"Thank you."
While Sasori changed into the dry clothes and towel drying his hair, Deidara wasted no time in helping himself to the pizza. One look at the pie and he let out an ugly guffaw at the thick layer of meat in the shape of a heart.
"What the hell... did they put all the meat they had on it?"
"I talked with the guy there a bit. It was at the end of the day..." Sasori replied, still shaking his head in the towel, "he said it was either use it or lose it."
"Heh, cute." Reaching for a slice, Deidara looked at the inner side of the lid of the box and laughed again, "nice poem."
Head up now and the towel around his neck, Sasori walked over for a slice, "What poem?"
"'I love your meat'?"
Picking up the pace, Sasori stared wide eyed and mouth opened in horror. He didn't ask for that to be written there! That- that! This is what he gets for making small chat with the chef! How this pizza was a Valentine's gift for his boyfriend and-
"I- I- I'm calling the police!" Sasori shrieked in horror, his once chilly body burning up in embarrassment at what that punk kid did to his pie.
"Because the pizza boy made a cheesy joke?" Deidara laughed as he raised the gooey slice to eat. "Mmm...meat."
Sasori was still panicking, "Agh, Deidara. That's probably not very romantic. In fact this whole thing is... I'm sorry."
"Yo..." Deidara chewed, lips smacking as he took another big bite getting sauce on his face in the process. "When have I ever been romantic, hmm?"
Sasori stared at the blond, "never..."
"Damn straight." Deidara grunted, "now come have some pizza while it's still hot and meaty."
The two are their pizza together on the couch, wine glasses filled with bubbly pop as midnight soon approached.
"This is okay? You really don't mind?" Sasori asked, worried.
Quickly getting up, "let me get your gift, lovey lumps~!" Deidara chimed sarcastically, drawling our the pet name as he ran into out of the room.
Sasori rolls his eyes but still gives a small smile, "lovey lumps..."
Coming backing with a plop on the couch, Deidara handed Sasori a box of chocolate, "I really didn't know what to get you. I'm no good at this stuff, hmph."
Sasori stared at the box of chocolate feeling deflated. The box was even in poor condition as there was a big piece of the label been ripped off. He could have probably just given one-
"I thought you'd get me one too, but what you got me was way better! A romantic dinner, a poem and now..." Deidara reached for the chocolates and lifted the top off, "dessert!"
Sasori looked down, a little confused. Weren't boxed chocolates supposed to be sealed up and-
"Who's been tasting my chocolate?" He scoffed half heartedly.
"You were late, okay!?"
"If you're going to eat the chocolate, at least eat the whole thing." Sasori mumbled as he picked up the pink filled chocolate. "Say... what would you have done if I had brought home flowers?"
Deidara stopped wiping his greasy hands on his clothes and stared at his boyfriend as if he had grown a second head, "the hell would I do with a bunch of flowers?"
"I know right?"
"My friend Hidan's boyfriend, you've met him, Kakuzu. So like, he grows them outside his house to sell like a side hussle. More like a wooden stand at the edge of the yard. Well, If I wanted flowers I'd just steal some of his, hm." Deidara gabbed on as Sasori enjoyed his sweet treats, "But like that goes back to the whole thing of what purpose the flowers serve. Okay they're pretty and liven up the place but come on! Have you seen the prices of roses? Get some real art instead! Or... or... dinner! Feed your damn family and- mmf!"
Sasori stuffed a chocolate in Deidara's chatty mouth, smiling as his boyfriend gave in, just accepting the sweet.
"Happy Valentine's Day, Deidara."
"Mm..." Deidara chewed before leaning and pecking Sasori on the lips, "Happy Valentine's. Love you."
As Sasori tossed out the box as he cleaned up while Deidara fell asleep on the couch, he spotted a piece of paper by the trash can. Looking at it carefully recognized it as the piece missing from the damaged box of chocolates he had gotten from Deidara.
"So the box of chocolates were a gift from Tobi?" He mused as he read the sticker Deidara had half hazardously tore off. It would also explain why it was half eaten. "Well, guess I wasn't the only one who forgot."
So u guys didnt get this a week after valentines like i planned because i was too lazy to proof read it properly and i still really havent but idc at this point hahaha
BYE LOSERS
