Her feet ache, but worst of all, her baggy scrubs smell like the sterile stench of hospital and her head is pounding from the lack of sleep and food in her system. She hastily rips open her purse and digs through the mess for her keys, a metaphor of what a mess her life has become as of lately.
"Oh thank god," she breathes, plucking the golden key from the bottom of her purse.
She slides the jagged edge into the doorknob and allows the door to swing open on its own. She stumbles hazardously into the doorway and leans heavily against the frame. She kicks off her sneakers and moans shamelessly from the feeling of her feet finally free from their prisons. She lazily pushes herself off the door, drops her purse on the side table and shuffles into her apartment, the door easily slamming shut on its own.
The sounds of hushed whispering catches her attention, sending a wave of paranoia to wrack through her body. She furrows her eyebrows and follows the faint voices toward her bedroom. Her heart is rapidly beating making breathing a difficult task. Her palms begin to sweat as her mouth somehow dries up instantly and a chill runs down her spine the closer she steps toward her bedroom in fear of what she might find.
She leans against the door and listens to rustling around and then her heart plummets to the pit of her stomach when she hears her fiancé's voice, accompanied by hers. Her palm instinctively smacks against the door, swinging the heavy wood wide open until it collides viciously with the wall behind.
The rustling stops and she is greeted with her half-naked fiancé, balancing on one foot as he attempts to replace his sock, because yes, that's the item of clothing that should be put on during this circumstance. Brown eyes immediately flick to her, his ex, completely naked, with only a sheet to cover the woman up, her sheet...kneeling on her bed.
Her head begins shaking to its own accord while her lips press firmly together and hot, red rage burns rapidly through her blood as she glares at the disgusting scene before her.
"You son of a bitch!" She growls, murderously stealing one step forward.
"Regina, please," her fiancé pleads while his foot drops down to the floor and he scrambles to be by her side.
On instinct, Regina steps to the side to dodge his unwelcome touch. "Don't!" She sternly commands, holding out her hand to still his anxious steps toward her. Her cold glare drifts to the woman that always made her skin crawl, provoking her upper lip to twitch with disgust. "You," she growls and takes a generous step closer to the bed, inspiring the woman to stumble back. "You whore. You two are meant for one another. Enjoy a life together where you both fuck around on each other. You win Marian, Robin is all yours. Now get the fuck out of my apartment," she bellows through one long breath.
"Regina, stop it," Robin demands only further infuriating her.
She quickly rushes toward him and slams her palms against his bare chest, causing him to stumble back. Her index finger pokes out into the space between them and shakes anxiously in his face.
"Don't. Don't you dare say a fucking word to try and justify any of this. I should have listened to my mother the first time you cheated on me with Marian," she fires off, her entire body shaking in pure rage as she closes her fists and slams them brutally against his chest once again, but to her surprise he catches her wrists.
"Calm down, Regina, let me try and explain-"
"Explain what?" She rages as she attempts to rip her hands free from his clutches, but he's so much stronger. "You're naked, she's naked and this room reeks of sex. There's nothing you can say to make this okay," she explains, her voice beginning to tremble, so she swallows quickly hoping to bite back the tears that are threatening to leak.
Marian suddenly catches Regina's attention when she slides from the bed, the sheet still pressed against her naked form. The woman ignores her glare and begins dressing as quickly as humanly possible.
"Regina, listen to me," Robin implores again only provoking her hands to squirm yet again from his tight grip. "I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. You know I have been confused lately, between you and Marian. She's my ex-girlfriend, we share a son," he pleads so desperately, but she's so tired of this same old song and dance.
"Shut up! That doesn't make this all okay. You didn't even know if Roland was yours because she cheated so much. I'm done with you and all your baggage. Get out," she sternly demands, but he just frowns and leans forward, most likely to kiss her while she moves back.
"Regina-"
"Get. Out!" She over enunciates and finally wretches her hands free from his strong hold.
"Robin, let's go," Marian softly whispers, quietly reaching for the bedroom door.
Regina glares at her fiancé with nothing, but hate burning through her squinted eyes. "Yes Robin, go with your whore."
"I want to talk," he whispers, but she immediately takes a step back and turns her cheek.
"There's nothing left to talk about. We are over this time," she replies with all the confidence in the world because there's no way in hell, she will ever take this man back. Robin stares intently at her, trying to persuade her decision, but she avoids his eyes like the plague, her stomach is already twisting and turning into knots and she cannot take a chance and meet his gaze. "Go," she slowly orders and turns her head completely, so she doesn't have to look at his sorry ass any longer.
Her eyes fall to the window, the sun just barely setting over the horizon, morphing every skyscraper into a tint of pink. She folds her arms protectively across her chest or maybe it's to keep the heart from spilling out and fights back the tears that are ready to spill against her own free will. She bites her lip and holds her breath until she hears her bedroom door softly click shut.
A small hiccup forces itself out of her mouth, inspiring her tears to break through the reluctant dam. Her shoulders bounce up and down as she squeezes her eyes closed, still trying desperately to fight against the tears. She has cried too many times over Robin, and he doesn't deserve one more tear.
Her eyes pop open just in time to watch the sun fall from the sky, disappearing behind the tall buildings around her. She watches through her blurred vision as the cars and people shuffle angrily through the busy city. Her heart constricts painfully in her chest causing her to double over while she places her hand against her chest and heaves for her next breath.
She reaches behind into her back pocket and pulls out her phone. She unlocks the device and quickly scrolls through her recent contact list. Her thumb hovers over the screen, hesitating a moment before she finally takes a deep breath and presses down. The phone rings only twice before the familiar voice greets her.
"Regina, darling, how are you? How's the hospital?" Her mother quickly questions as her bottom lip quivers from the familiar voice alone.
She misses home.
"Hello, mother," she begins, trying her best to disguise the pain consuming her voice.
"Regina, what's wrong?" Her mother inquires, because she's her mother and knows her better than anyone.
"Robin...we are over," she breathes out and falls back carelessly against her bed and the moment her back connects with the sheet, she springs quickly out of bed. "Fuck...disgusting," she mutters, cradling the phone between her cheek and shoulder and with all her pent up rage and aggression she claws at the sheets, pulling them into a tight ball.
"What's disgusting? What happened darling?" Her mother coos, coaxing her to open up and explain her troubled phone call.
Regina stomps across her room with her sheets held out as far away from her body as possible. She storms out of her bedroom and straight into her kitchen, shoving the tainted sheets into her garbage and quickly pulling the bag from the bin.
"Robin is disgusting. I broke up with him," she finally admits, and yanks open her front door. "I dumped his ass for good this time. He cheated on me again with Marian," she rambles on as she walks through her hall until she reaches her destination. She yanks open the garbage shoot and drops the nasty garbage bag inside. "Good riddance asshole," she shouts down the shoot and quickly struts away.
"Regina, why don't you come here and spend the summer in Sicily? It will clear your mind. You need a break from all your stressful clinical's and that loser ex-fiancé."
"I wish I could, but I can't," she whines as she enters her apartment and locks the door behind her. She trudges her aching feet toward the kitchen and pulls out a bottle of red wine. She doesn't even bother with a glass, just straight from the bottle will do just fine. She plops down on her couch and sighs, allowing the exhaustion to seep into her bones. "I'm almost done with this session at the hospital," she explains and takes a greedy sip from the bottle.
"Well, maybe when you are done? We miss you," she softly whispers only further breaking Regina's heart.
"I know mom, I miss you guys, too," she exhales heavily through her nose and presses the bottle to her lips once more.
She hesitates for a moment as her mind races through different ways she can scam her way out of clinical's. She shakes her head and pulls the red liquid into her mouth, hoping to drown out her sorrows.
"Well, maybe for Christmas you come here," Cora suggests so sweetly that Regina already finds herself nodding along because she cannot stand disappointing this woman ever.
"I'll try mom," she answers, causing her mother to sigh in response before it falls completely silent on the other end.
Regina, her mother and her father were always very close while she was growing up. Her parents were her support team and best friends, even if she was the popular cheerleader, she always found time for her parents. That's why it was almost unbearable when they sat her down to explain their sudden move to Europe. She knew they enjoyed their trip, but never enough to actually move there.
"So, mother, tell me about the farm," she finds herself inquiring just so she can hear her mother's voice at a time like this.
XXXXX
"Regina." She jerks awake just as her elbow slips from the counter, throwing off her balance and almost causing her to fall from her stool. "Honey, you need to get some sleep," her dear friend, Ivy, pouts as she slides into the chair beside her.
"I'm fine," she rasps out through her hoarse voice from the lack of sleep and runs her hands over her face in a lame attempt to wake herself back up.
"You don't look fine," Ivy taunts while reaching over and stealing a carrot from Regina's plate. She groans, shoving her lunch under her friend's nose in which Ivy happily begins nibbling away.
"What I mean is, I'll eventually be fine." Her elbows reconnect with the counter as her face falls in defeat to her palms.
"Regina, just go to Sicily, spend some time with your parents, get over that piece of shit, Robin, and be done with all this moping around," her friend harshly scolds as she crunches obnoxiously on another carrot. "How the hell are you supposed to focus here at the hospital when you can't even keep your damn eyes open?" She snaps once again as Regina's eyelids become all too heavy to keep open, so Ivy nudges into her side, causing her to slip off the counter, yet again.
"Ivy," she snaps as she fumbles to catch herself from falling off the stool once again. She bitterly folds her arms across the countertop and gently rests her head on top of her sleeves. "Just let me rest my eyes for two minutes," she mumbles just as her eyes begin to flutter closed again.
"Regina!" She perks right up from the familiar cold voice of Dr. Belfrey. "Are you honestly sleeping right now when there are people dying in this hospital?" Those beady eyes are pinning her into submission, and she finds herself unable to properly answer the cold-hearted bitch.
"No, I was just eating my lunch," she defends, but the woman just rolls her eyes and summons her with her index finger curling angrily.
"Let's get a move on, Mills," Dr. Belfrey coldly states before exiting the cafeteria.
Regina groans, slipping off her stool despite the headache that's beginning to form as exhaustion is slowly consuming her mind.
"Go to Sicily," Ivy instructs one last time before Regina slides out the door and vanishes from her sight.
XXXXXX
It has been one week since she kicked Robin out of their apartment. He has called and texted every damn day since, but she refuses to answer one, because she knows she will crumble the second he begs for another chance. There was always something about Robin, with his pleading puppy dog eyes and permanent frown embedded into his lips that indefinitely broke her each and every time.
Every night she cries herself to sleep and fights against every cell in her body that's yearning for the fool. She has found herself calling her parents every night, just to hear the comfort in their voices like when she was a child.
She sluggishly followed Dr. Belfrey around the hospital the remainder of the day, until her boss couldn't stand to see her depressing face anymore. Now as she stumbles across her threshold, day eight in the pity party that is her life, she slams the door with all her rage and tumbles into her kitchen.
She ransacks every cabinet in search of more wine, but comes up short, not one damn bottle left. She has quite literally drank her house dry in one week. She scoffs at her pathetic life as she climbs on top of the counter, so she can reach the cabinet above her refrigerator. It's a special spot where Robin always kept his whiskey. She rips the dusty bottle from the cabinet and climbs off the countertop.
She refuses to be a total lush in this situation, so she actually pulls out a glass this time. She twists off the cap aggressively and watches without a care in the world as the cap flies through the air and rolls along the tiled floor. She pours the whiskey into the tumbler, already cringing at the dark colored liquid as it sloshes into the glass. She inhales a deep breath and downs the alcohol with confidence. That is until the liquid reaches the back of her throat and burns a fiery path all the way down into her chest, provoking her to cough violently as her body quakes in disgust.
"Yuck," she chokes out, but she's already pouring herself another glass.
She downs that hefty amount quicker than the first and pours her third. She firmly grips the glass in her right hand and begins shuffling toward her bedroom. The minute she steps inside, horrific images of her naked ex and his very naked ex, flash before her, causing her to cringe once again. She slams back her third whiskey, but this time the liquid slides down a lot smoother.
Her head begins to feel a little fuzzy as her feet scuff and stumble against the hardwood floors. She ungraciously falls to the corner of the bed and sits down, setting her now empty glass beside her. The alcohol swims diligently through her veins, slowly washing away the pain that fills her broken heart.
She stares aimlessly at the mirror, that drunken mess of a woman glaring right back at her. No wonder Robin didn't want you...look at you. Her eyes drift to her tangled locks, that are in disarray, from her hand uncontrollably running through neurotically. Dark circles are slowly painting the outside of her eyes and she knows her mother would scold her for looking like a raccoon. Her scrubs are wrinkled for the first time ever and that's when she notices this new her.
A new her, that she swore she would never become, but here she is. Drunk off three whiskeys and glaring at herself in the mirror. She runs her trembling hands over her face and stands tall from the bed. She staggers toward her closet and slides the door open before stretching on her tiptoes to hazardously yank her suitcase down from the shelf.
In her drunken stupor, she begins frantically packing her entire wardrobe because she needs to get the hell out of this haunted apartment before she drives herself insane. She cannot continue wallowing in self-pity and drinking her days away without any food or sleep.
She packs away everything she may need and drags the unbelievably heavy suitcase out of her room, cursing to herself for over packing. She wheels the bag to her front door and falls recklessly on top of the suitcase. She yanks out her phone and begins her search for the cheapest ticket prices available in the next twenty-four hours.
As her fingers scroll and swipe against the brightly lit screen, her phone begins to vibrate, with his name flashing before her very eyes. She groans, but her fingers move to their own accord, answering instantly, most likely because of how drunk she is, sure let's just blame the alcohol here.
"Hello," she drawls out, slurring a little more than she anticipated.
"Regina? Baby, are you drunk?" Robin questions in disbelief because he knows she drinks every now and then, but never to the point of inebriation.
"Who asked you? You're not my fiancé anymore," she grumbles, rolling her eyes which coincidentally causes her body to sway slightly on top of her suitcase.
"What? I asked you," Robin calmly explains, but she already forgot what he had previously asked and she swears he's speaking in riddles. "Regina, I think we should talk, can I come home?"
"Home-hmmmm," she slurs the words together and closes her eyes hoping to regain some composure. "That's a bad idea," she hiccups and curses the universe for its untimely actions.
"I know, but I need to talk to you. We can work through this, that's why we are such a strong couple, because we always fight for our relationship," he begs into the phone while her brain tries to remember every word he is speaking, but she is far too drunk to be holding a conversation let alone one that will significantly change her life.
"Nope, I'm done. You want a booty call tonight? Call your whore," she over pronounces each word as she speaks louder into the phone, pressing her lips firmly against the device.
"Regina, stop calling her names, she's still the mother of my child," he scolds, but she is enjoying the warm buzz tingling through her limbs to actually care about what he has to say this evening. "I'm coming over, we need to talk and I'm worried about you. You're way too intoxicated to properly take care of yourself."
"I'm fine," she waves her hand just as her butt slips off the suitcase and the floor suddenly connects with a loud smack against her ass. "Fuck," she groans, absentmindedly rubbing her tender bottom.
"Enough! I'm on my way," he sternly announces.
"No!" She fights right back and points her finger at absolutely nobody. "You don't get to swoop in and save me now. I don't need a man to protect me and make me happy. I'm fine all on my own. You hurt me for the last time, Robin, and I will die before I ever grant you the opportunity to cheat on me again."
She nods her head with finality, fully proud of herself and abruptly ends the call. She tosses her phone across the room and that's when she hears a sharp crack, but because she's so drunk, she simply shrugs her shoulders and rests her head down on top of the cool suitcase, her eyes fluttering closed instantly.
Just five minutes...
XXXXXX
Her stomach feels as though a brick is embedded deep into her gut while her head is far too heavy to even lift. Her brain is swimming. Her temples pounding. Her mouth, far too dry.
She groans involuntarily and bargains with her eyelids if they could just lift a little, she swears she will rest them again so very soon. Who knew eyelashes could be so heavy?
"Baby," his voice sends an electric wave of panic to ripple beneath her flesh, inspiring her body to jerk wide awake. Her palms press into the mattress, lifting her tired limbs off the warm sheets. Through squinted eyes, she glares at her ex-fiancé in utter shock. "Well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes," he teases and leans forward with his lips puckering out, like she will actually grant him a kiss.
Instantly, she pulls back, her face contorting painfully in bewilderment. "Robin?" Her voice is so raspy, she hardly recognizes the sound herself. "What the hell are you doing here?" She grumbles through her harsh throat and winces.
"Regina," he sighs, leaning forward once more only persuading her body to scoot further away. "We talked about this last night. I'm sorry. I don't want to lose you. We are going to fix this," he smiles that sweet, charming grin, that always makes her crumble, but not today.
"Are you out of your mind? I was drunk last night, and you know I cannot hold a conversation when I'm intoxicated. Oh god," she fumbles quickly when her mind acknowledges that she's only in one of his oversized t-shirts. "Robin, please tell me we didn't sleep together," she groans while sitting back on her heels and scrubbing her hands down her face.
"You were passed out most of the night aside from our talk. I'm not an animal, Regina," he scoffs appearing offended, but she's too busy in her own head to care about his ego right now.
"Well, you could have fooled me with all your infidelity," she deadpans, desperately crawling out from her sheets.
"Come on, Regina, don't be like that. You know I love you. I proposed to you, not her. That has to mean something to you," he attempts to defend himself while she rushes off toward the bathroom to brush away the foul taste that's drying out her mouth.
"You're a damn fool if you truly believe I'm going to forgive you," she enunciates, so hopefully his thick skull will comprehend her words. Her ex leans against the bathroom door, his eyes watching her every move as she begins brushing her teeth. "I hope you're enjoying the show," she mumbles around her toothbrush and foamy mouth. "This is the last time you'll ever see me."
"Come on, baby, let's get you back into bed and we can cuddle all day," he suggests, lifting his shirt up and over his body, showing off his chiseled chest and predominant abdominal muscles that used to easily persuade her like some lovesick teenager, but not anymore.
"A damn fool," she reminds him and spits out the toothpaste. "Besides, I believe I have a flight to catch."
"What?" He squawks like a damn pigeon, dodging an unexpected tree branch.
"I'm going to visit my parents," she states, and brushes right passed the half-naked man.
"You're going to Sicily?" He sternly questions, following closely behind her.
"Yes Robin, that's exactly what I just said," she exasperates while she goes in search for her phone near her bed, but comes up empty handed. "Where the hell is my phone?" She mutters under her breath while she hopelessly tries to recall the events of last night.
"Here." Robin snatches her phone from his side of the nightstand and jabs the device into the space between them. She hastily rips the phone from his hands, ready to search the ticket she purchased last night, because truthfully, she has no idea what time her flight is. "You're seriously going to-"
"What the hell happened to my phone? It's cracked," she bellows while snapping her accusing eyes toward her ex.
"Don't look at me like that, Regina, it was cracked when I got here. I think you tossed it aside and the screen broke."
"Perfect," she breathes out and scans her emails for the confirmation on her flight. "I need to move if I'm ever going to make this flight," she mutters to herself, ignoring the man watching her intently and probably assuming she finally lost her damn mind.
"Please, Regina, don't go," he begs, reaching out for her hand, but she is quick to deflect the unwanted touch. "Fine, then let me come with you, we can work on us."
"Ha!" She barks out a sarcastic laugh and rolls her eyes. "My mother would rip out your heart if she ever saw your face again after everything you did," she scoffs, stripping away his shirt without a second thought. Even though she is in desperate need of a shower, but she just doesn't have enough time, she's already cutting this so damn close. "I expect all your shit to be gone when I return."
"Baby, stop." Robin slides his thick fingers across her bare ribs, provoking goosebumps to spread like wildfire across her chilled flesh, but her heart is numb, it just isn't in it anymore and never has she ever been more certain.
She quickly whips around and shoves Robin back. "I mean it, Robin, we are through. I'm done this time. You have one week to remove your belongings, or I'll throw everything out when I return. Do I make myself clear?" She sternly threatens, despite the fact that she's completely naked.
She spins back around and rushes to clothe her bare flesh.
"Please don't leave me, baby," Robin whines, but she pretends she doesn't even hear him and sweeps right passed him.
She gathers her phone and exits the bedroom without one glance in his direction. She follows her hallway into her kitchen and packs a water before she collects her suitcase from the night before. She swings open the door and hesitates for a brief moment when she feels Robin lurking behind her.
"I mean it Robin, one week and I'll be back."