"Emma?"
That all too familiar voice, that her ears craved for the past four months, rings loudly through the barn. Her mouth pops open as she gapes at Rocinante, as though the damn horse is playing tricks on her. She tells herself to breathe slowly, but her heart hammers painfully, fully awake for the first time after four long months.
She maintains one hand upon Rocinante before her toes dig into her boots and she slowly turns around to meet her. Her breath hitches from her beauty alone. How did she not remember how drop-dead gorgeous she is?
Short, half-breaths are all that her lungs can produce in the moment as she assesses the woman who stole her heart. Those gorgeous, thick raven tresses are so much longer than four months ago, the length falling passed her breasts. Her eyes are painted in a dark, smokey, sultry look that makes her knees quakes with lust. Her succulent lips are a deep red and her own lips itch to smear that perfect shade of lipstick.
Green eyes travel down to the thick, cream colored sweater that's oversized and protecting that body from her greedy eyes. Her dark, denim jeans might as well be painted on for how tight they appear, accompanied by her knee-high, black, suede boots.
How did she ever allow this woman to leave her bed?
"Emma," Regina gasps again before her voice hits a few octaves higher, "What the hell is going on with your stomach?!"
Those enchanting brown eyes double in size as her jaw practically comes unhinged and almost smacking the floor. Her feet shuffle forward, but something in her mind screams for her to stop, because she abruptly stills.
"Regina, I-I didn't think you were going to come," she stammers as she tries to muster up something to say.
"You didn't answer my question," Regina quickly fires back, never skipping a beat per usual Regina fashion. "You're pregnant? You're pregnant and you didn't tell me?" She screeches so high, even Rocinante shakes his head and breathes out his protest.
"I know, but-"
"How could you not tell me? How long have you known? How far along are you? When did this happen? Do I even want to know when this occurred? Who's the father?" Regina spits out question after question, never once taking a moment to breathe throughout her curiosity.
"That's...a lot of questions," she mutters, gently gliding her hand up the horse's nose for support and comfort.
"Start explaining, Emma," she growls as her feet take an assertive step forward, expressing how infuriated she truly is right now.
Emma swallows down her fear and dread for this conversation and shifts through her mind of all the things she has wanted to say, but nothing is coming in clear. Her mind is like a distorted radio, everything is coming in half words through the scratchy white noise and she cannot pick up on one damn wavelength.
"Okay, where do I begin..."
"The beginning," Regina deadpans, her eyes burning with a fiery passion that will end with Emma's head on a platter.
"Right. I found out the day before you left back to New York-"
"What?" She breathlessly whispers as though Emma physically just punched her in the gut and knocked all the wind out of her.
"I know," she whines, but hastily proceeds. "You had your period and that's when it hit me that I had skipped mine. I had no clue when the last time was, and I panicked. I bought you Rocky Road that night and myself a pregnancy test that came back positive."
"Emma, how could you?" Regina grumbles through a clenched jaw while her fists ball together at her sides. "If you weren't pregnant right now, I would hit you!"
"If I wasn't pregnant right now, there would be no reason to hit me, because we would've never been apart."
Regina's jaw flexes while her grip only tightens, most likely indenting her palms with her nails. "What?" She chokes out as she gapes at her in disbelief.
Emma slowly releases Rocinante and takes a step closer to the distraught brunette and finally owns up to her truth. Her lips twist as she tries to find all the right words to explain herself. Her hands shove deep into her coat pockets, so her ex doesn't see them shaking uncontrollably.
"If I wasn't pregnant, we would be in the states right now, together. I would have gone back to Boston and I know we would have stayed together," she tentatively explains.
"What does being pregnant have to do with any of this? Who cares if you were pregnant? Why couldn't you tell me? Why couldn't you just go home?"
"I panicked. I-I don't know who the father is," she quietly admits, wincing as the words leave her mouth. "It could be Neal, but it could also be Killian, and I couldn't go home and explain that to my dad or Neal. I have to know the truth before dragging Neal into this. I...I just knew I needed to stay here, and I also knew, you would never go back to New York if you knew the truth."
"Emma," she sadly breathes, shaking her head, whipping her own face with those long dark tresses.
"Stop, don't even try to deny it. You know damn well you would have stayed here," she accuses, causing Regina to stiffen in front of her. Regina defiantly crosses her arms over her chest and purses her lips. "Try and tell me otherwise," Emma demands, but her ex remains silent and rolls her eyes. "I couldn't let you sabotage your career for my irresponsible decisions. You needed to go, Regina," she softly declares.
Those cocoa colored irises drift toward the top of her eyes, so she can stare aimlessly at the ceiling and not her. Emma's not quite sure but she feels like maybe she's trying to fight against her emotions and maybe even her tears.
"You're right, I wouldn't have left," Emma's mouth pops open to respond, but Regina's quick to deny her the opportunity, "BUT that should have been my decision, not yours!" She yells with a ferocity that persuades Emma's feet to stumble back a step.
"Regina-"
"No! That's bullshit, Emma, I loved you and we could have worked something out," she urges, but Emma knows in her heart what she did was right. "How could you do this to me?"
"I didn't do this to you, I did it for you!" She demands and takes a step forward even though the glare in those dark eyes has her shaking in her boots. "I know how important it is for you to become a doctor. I wasn't about to be the reason you didn't reach your goal. You needed to go home and work on your residency even though I wanted you here every day with me. I couldn't be selfish, I made a decision, so you didn't have to." Regina firmly presses her lips together as she slowly shakes her head, but her eyes are softening whether she knows it or not. "I understand you're hurt that I lied and I know you are upset because I made the decision for you, but I swear it was all for you. As risky as it sounds, I was hoping that maybe one day we would find each other again."
"What?" She gasps and Emma watches as Regina's nails dig into her upper arms to battle away her emotions.
"I know it was dumb, but I really thought some day in the future, we could be together," she shyly admits her secret little wish for their future as all her insecurities claw at the back of her mind.
"You hoped that I would help raise your baby?" Regina softly questions.
"I uh..." she fiddles with the pockets of her jeans as her greatest fear of rejection slices through her heart. She feels as though her entire body is under a microscope and all her flaws are on full display for Regina to poke at. "I thought that we could be a family and this baby would be your baby too..." her words trail off when the cold stare becomes too much.
She has no idea what the hell her ex is thinking. All she knows, is there's a fire burning in those eyes and she's sure Regina's about to rip her heart right out and leave her for dead. Her dream of a better tomorrow is slowly slipping through her fingers and she can't seem to hold on anymore. She understood the consequences of her actions, but she truly felt in her heart that if they could just push through this time apart, then their future would be so much brighter.
"You thought we could be a family?" Regina whispers in a deep, sultry voice, that jolts awake the butterflies in Emma's stomach that have been hibernating since the day she left.
"I did," she confesses as the front of her boot kicks a little hay absentmindedly from her nerves. She's a fiddling, bumbling mess, and she just wishes she could communicate more distinct sentences right now. "Please say something," she implores and takes one more step closer, leaving only one more step before they are in each other's arms once again.
"I don't know what to say," Regina concedes, barely audible enough for her to hear.
Emma's heart takes off racing in a marathon to win this woman's heart back. Her heart outweighs every logical bone she has in her body, and she finds herself reaching out for her ex before she ever grants her hands permission to do so.
"I told you four months ago that it just wasn't the right time for us to be together," she softly begins to explain, taking Regina's hands in her own.
"And you think now is any different?" She quips with a smug smirk plastered across her flawless face.
"I honestly don't know," she admits through a long, drawn out exhale. "But what I do know, is that you need to finish what you started and be the best doctor you can be." Again, Regina doesn't mutter one word and it feels like someone just stabbed a sword right through Emma's heart. "Do you hate me?" She timidly questions, her hands tightening around Regina's while her thumbs caress the warm skin.
"Yes," she firmly demands.
A small smirk tugs at the corner of Emma's mouth because she can see her ex fighting against all her instincts to forgive her and to just understand where she is coming from.
"Good," Emma states with conviction and tugs the beautiful woman closer.
Regina's mouth parts to protest, but Emma doesn't allow her the opportunity before she slams their lips roughly together. Fireworks erupt as her eyes flutter closed and her heart swells with so much love. She releases one of Regina's hands and grips the back of her neck, commanding that she comes closer while she deepens the kiss.
To her total surprise, Regina doesn't hesitate to kiss her back. She pushes forward into those deep, red, plump lips, that she has been dreaming about for four long months and guides them apart, so she can claim that mouth once again. Her tongue anxiously dips inside, no longer able to control herself, and brushes against Regina's.
A tiny whimper resonates between them and even though she feels the emotion in her heart, she knows that sound came from Regina. This only encourages her to continue. It's a raw, animalistic roughness to the kiss, confessing just how much they missed each other and needed to feel one another yet again.
Regina's delicate fingers find the lapels of her jacket and ball the material into tight fists as they continue to become reacquainted with one another after four long months. Emma nips at her bottom lip just the way she likes and relishes in the little whimper she creates in the process.
Emma seems to be pulling away far too quickly, but lately, she finds herself always winded, no matter what she does. She makes sure Regina knows that she doesn't want to actually part, by holding onto her neck for dear life and connecting their foreheads.
"I love you," Emma finally confesses. "I've loved you for a long time now and we may not be able to be together right now, but I know you are my future."
"I love you, too, Emma, you're just...such an idiot. I know you want me to finish with my career, but I want to be here for you...for this baby," she announces and just like that Emma's insides to turn to mush and she's falling even more in love with her.
"But-"
Regina presses her index finger to Emma's lips, demanding that she shuts up and allows her to finish. So, she obeys seeing as she has been the one doing most of the talking so far.
"Let's go inside, sit down and talk about this."
Emma inhales as much oxygen as her lungs can accept and slowly breathes out all her worries and fears. "Alright."
"Hi Rocinante," Regina happily greets her horse and lovingly scratches his nose. "Has she been a pain while I've been gone?"
"Hey!" Emma lamely whines her defense, provoking an adorable smirk to grace Regina's smudged lips. She smiles proudly to herself at accomplishing her goal of smearing the woman's lipstick.
"I'll come visit in a little bit," Regina assures her horse before she slips her hand in Emma's and guides them to toward the door.
XXXXX
Emma strips away her coat and boots while Regina watches her intently from the bed that was once theirs. She's perched at the edge, sitting with poise and class while ghosts of their past bodies roll around behind her, haunting Emma's mind. Imagines of the life they shared for a brief time, play like a movie behind Regina's back, taunting her.
"So," Emma swallows hard and pushes those images from her head, "Do your parents know you are here this time?"
"They don't, my mother also informed me that you moved, and you would not be here when I arrived," Regina states so matter of factly that Emma's heart actually hurts.
"Oh...funny, she told me that if you came, we were expected to be in the same room together and get along," she divulges on the explanation she received from Cora and tentatively shuffles her feet closer to the bed. Despite all the nervous anxiety coursing through her veins, she sits down beside Regina.
"Well, it seems my mother will have some explaining to do once we get ourselves situated."
"I guess so."
"Emma?"
"Yeah?"
"Did you mean it?" Blonde brows furrow as Regina's eyes drift to meet hers, confused on what exactly she is asking. "Did you mean it when you said you want us to be a family?"
"Of course, I meant it, Regina. Who wouldn't want you as their partner in crime forever?"
"What about the baby's father?"
"If it's Killian, I highly doubt I'll ever see that man again. If it's Neal, I assume he will want to be a part of his son's life, but he's in a new relationship, he won't come between us," she gently explains and prays to some higher power that Regina won't freak out and leave her.
"Son?"
"Huh?"
"You're having a boy?" She breathlessly whispers sending a jolt of electricity to shock Emma's frantic heart.
"Yes," she smiles proudly, her hand automatically moving to its own accord to rest protectively over her baby boy. Regina's enchanting eyes gloss over as tears fill to the rim. The woman frowns, but Emma knows it's one of those adorable pouts for something that melts Regina's heart. "Regina?"
"Hmmm?"
"Do you think we can do this together?" She shyly investigates as the world begins spinning recklessly around her. Every negative thought zips through her mind, every rejection rings in her ear, while Regina continues to stare at her with a blank expression.
"I want to."
"But?"
"No, but's, I want to, I just don't know how we are going to stay in a relationship when we are so far apart. I wish you could come back to New York and live with me," Regina confesses as her fingers sweep golden locks away from Emma's shoulders.
"I know, but I can't fly in my third trimester."
"I know," she falls silent and through curious eyes Emma studies the way those chestnut eyes are shifting all around to examine her face.
"What?"
"I understand why you did what you did, but I'm still so mad at you. I feel like I missed out on so much," she pouts, causing Emma's heart to break all over again.
"I promise, you didn't miss out on anything important." She gently takes her hand and kisses her cool palm. "I was around three months when I found out. The only thing you've missed out on, has been my very unattractive feasts of inhaling everything around me. I would say in the past month and a half he's become more active, but other than that, it's just me getting fat," she so bluntly announces and hopes it will help soothe Regina's frustrations about everything.
"Emma, I have to be back in New York next week," she sadly explains, but Emma won't allow that minor detail to wedge another gap between them.
"I know, let's think about this. The baby is due in February-"
"February?" The brunette hopefully questions in a sweet cooing sound that divulges a little more about how much she cares for this baby already.
"Yes, hopefully he won't be as stubborn as you," Emma teases, earning herself an unamused look.
"Yes, because you aren't stubborn at all."
"Anyways, the baby is due in February. Maybe when he's three months we could come to New York."
"Emma, I have three weeks vacation during my residency. I could come back and visit after he's born and then maybe we could spend a week here in May and we could all go back together, so you don't have to travel alone with him. Oh, um...do you have a name picked out?"
"Not yet. I like Hunter and Flynn-what? You are making that same stupid face your mother made when I told her the names," she argues while Regina fails at masking her facial expressions.
"They are cute, I like more traditional names."
"Of course, you do." She rolls her eyes away, but then she feels soft lips pressing against her own.
"I like them," Regina declares against her lips, her warm breath tingling her skin and sending shivers down her back. "I don't care what name you choose, so long as I am right here beside you."
Instantly Regina presses her mouth firmly against Emma's, sealing her devotion with a kiss.
"Wait," against all her hormonal urges, Emma slowly breaks apart the kiss. "There's no way you can afford coming here two more times. I don't even know if I can afford my plane ticket home."
"Stop worrying, I will take care of it," Regina casually responds while leaning forward to capture her lips once again, but Emma pulls away, leaving her hanging.
"How could you afford that? Tickets are anywhere from eighteen hundred, to over three grand!"
"Well, I guess now would be a good time to explain my parents are very wealthy," she nonchalantly announces, provoking Emma's mouth to pop open in utter shock. She would have never guessed from the lifestyle they live, especially from their one-bedroom cabin that the family is wealthy. "My father was the mayor of our hometown in Maine and my mother owned a very popular, authentic Italian restaurant which did wonders for their savings when they sold it."
"What?" Emma shrieks, her mind tripping on the new information that so casually fell from Regina's lips. "I told your mother she should open a restaurant, she just shrugged and said, I'm retired." She mimics the older woman's careless shrug as her face morphs into shock and disbelief.
"Yes, well, that's my mother. Anyways, don't worry about the money for my visit or for you to get home, it will be taken care of. Besides, I know you are going to want to return to visit my parents with the baby."
"Of course, I will. I already told them, no matter what, this little boy is their grandson."
Regina smiles proudly as more tears fill her eyes. She cups her chin firmly and guides their lips back together again. "I love you so much, but don't you dare, keep something like this from me ever again."
"Never."
XXXXX
"Mother!" Regina exclaims as they walk hand in hand into the quaint cabin.
The door falls closed behind them as they are engulfed in everything Christmas. From the bright tree glowing in the corner of the living room, giving off that fresh pine smell, to the warm cookies baking in the over.
"Regina, darling! You came!" The older woman gushes as she rounds the corner from the kitchen. Her eyes instantly fall to their conjoined hands and somehow her smile grows even wider. "And you two figured things out! Isn't this lovely," she moves in to hug Regina, but the younger woman holds up her hand to still her mother.
"Mother," she sternly begins and tightens her grip around Emma's innocent hand. "You told me that Emma wouldn't be here."
"Well, I am not a mind reader, Regina," she dramatically defends, while Emma's mind wonders if she can steal a few cookies and slip out the back.
"You told Emma, that we would be expected to be in the same room and get along," Regina adds on, not once wavering in her mother's presence.
"Yes, well, maybe I meddled a little bit because I panicked when I heard Robin's voice," the older woman quips, folding her arms angrily across her chest, daring her daughter to challenge her.
"Robin?" Emma barks out as her mind reels with uncertainty. Regina squeezes her hand even tighter and turns her head to offer a weak smile. "Are you two back together?"
"No!" She hastily defends as her dark eyebrows pinch together. "When my mother extended the Christmas invitation again, I knew I needed to come here and try to straighten things out with you?"
"But you were together, before you came here?" Emma quickly retorts.
"Not necessarily."
Emma's face contorts painfully into disgust and confusion. "Did you sleep with him?" She snaps, provoking Cora into taking a few steps back, either to allow them privacy or because she's terrified Emma might blow up from the answer. Regina sighs and already Emma has her answer before she mutters a small yes. "Seriously?"
"Hey!" She snaps all too quickly, "you broke up with me, so you have no right to be mad at what I did while we were apart."
"More like who you did," she mutters under her breath which earns her a death glare and if looks could kill, they would be planning Emma's funeral right now.
"Low blow, Emma." She rolls her green eyes in defiance, but that's when she notices their fingers are still tightly bound together through their stupid little bickering. "Anyways, mother, you cannot meddle into my life like that," she whines and completely drops their small fight for now.
"Oh shush, it was brilliant, it worked and look," Cora enthusiastically beams as she carefully cups Emma's large bump, "we have a beautiful baby boy on the way."
"I can't believe you kept that from me," Regina argues, but her voice is losing its harsh willpower and she's growing soft from the idea of an infant.
"We knew you would be foolish and stay. Now you understand how firmly we stand about you finishing your residency," Cora scolds like a true mother, all while her thumbs gently caress the baby's protruding limb.
"He's always so active when you are around," Emma vocalizes without processing her words as her eyes drift down to the foot poking out the side of her stomach.
"That's because he loves me," Cora confidently states before she turns her attention toward her daughter. "Have you felt him yet?" Her voice is soft and angelic for either her son's sake or maybe for Regina's, because truthfully, the younger brunette appears a little queasy.
"No...not yet."
"Come feel," Cora happily offers, but Regina is quickly shaking her head.
"I will later, mother," she shyly responds. "I'm going to find daddy and give him a piece of my mind for not ratting you two out!" She growls before she turns on her toes and storms off in search of Henry.
"Are you okay?" Cora quietly inquires the moment her daughter is out of ear shot.
"I believe so. Is Robin the reason why you were getting all weird around me and why you wanted Regina to find out about the baby all of a sudden?"
"Of course," Cora shamelessly admits with a wicked grin. "I wasn't about to sit back and allow that man to weasel his way back into my daughter's life when she has a beautiful woman and child waiting right here for her."
Emma smiles proudly and leans forward to press a sweet kiss to the older woman's cheek. "Thank you," she whispers just before she pulls away.
"Don't thank me, you two are meant to be."