Hi everyone! I just wanted to clarify a few things before we get into so good Brucas content:1) Peyton didn't have anything to to do with Ted's death, it was another girl called Pia that had been seeing Mouth. It was really just a set up for some Brooke and Kate angst and showing that this is still very much affecting Brooke in significant ways.2) The baby's name is Maya - it was originally Ellie and then I changed it but I missed a few name changes in previous chapters so my apologies! I'll get those changed asap (apologies if a few more slip through)Without further ado... it's time to begin again.

Chapter Nineteen – Begin Again

"I'm fine, mom." Brooke insisted as she spoke with Victoria on the phone as she arrived at the hospital.

"Honey, please do not lie to me—"

"I'm in a good place and I know I went a little crazy at dinner—"

"Justifiably so. I can't believe she would stay once she saw you and Kate there, she should have left!" Victoria exclaimed, annoyed about the entire situation. As soon as Brooke had calmed down, she called her mother, just for an extra ear to unload onto."I knew it was too much to ask that this family could have a period of peace from all the hurt and drama."

"She was hoping I wouldn't remember who she was, and that Kate didn't say anything." Brooke concluded. She had significantly calmed down after their disastrous dinner party. She couldn't control what happened to her dad and it wasn't like she had to be friends with this girl, so she just decided to put it behind her and move forward. "I have more important things to worry about, such as the fact that Kate is intent on making my life miserable right now..."

"Are you two still not speaking?"

"Barely. She's acting like I'm the one who wronged her. I guess it's just another thing that's too good to be true—that Kate and I would get on longer than a few months." Brooke grumbled as she spotted Lucas walking towards her with two coffees in hand.

"I'm sorry honey, I really wish I could be there with you."

"I'm fine mom, I'm a big girl."

"I know. I also know how strong you are. You've been through so much Brooke and you always come out the other side with a smile on your face. You can do just the same right now."

"Thanks momma. I gotta go, I love you."

"Love you too honey, call me later."

"I will, bye." Brooke hung up the phone and gratefully accepted the coffee from Lucas. "Thank you, what did I do to deserve this?"

"I'm a firm believer that good news should also come with a coffee." He told her.

Brooke raised her eyebrow; "What kind of good news?"

"A patient is coming in today with Ollier's disease and I was thinking you could remove them the tumours from his growth plates, so I can get in there and reconstruct the hand."

Brooke eyed Lucas curiously as a small smiled graced her face; "Hold on—I'll do the dissection?"

"If you're up for it."

"Hell yes I am, but you're not just giving this to me because you're trying to cheer me up—"

"Oh, that is exactly why I'm giving it you." He teased, but he wasn't lying. He wanted her to smile again and what better way than with a kick ass surgery? "Plus, you're kind of a good surgeon…" he complimented as Brooke smiled widely.

"Oh ok" she said with a giggle as they made their way into the hospital. She normally wasn't keen on any kind of special treatment, but today, a difficult and bloody surgery was exactly what she needed.

"By the way, I'm going to talk to Peyton tonight…" Lucas said as Brooke looked at him, completely surprised. He'd been avoiding her all week and camping out at Brooke's house, but he realised it was probably time he dealt with things. Peyton was holding on to something that wasn't there and he needed to make that clear.

"Oh. That's—that's good?" Brooke said as more of a question. She was nervous for him and she didn't want to assume she knew how he was feeling about it.

"Yeah. It will be. It's just – it's over Brooke and I need her to realise that so we can both move on and be happy." He told her. What he really wanted to say was 'so I can move on and be happy with you' but he knew that wouldn't help the situation in the slightest. He went about his relationship with Brooke entirely wrong the first time and he was determined not the screw it up again. "So you'll be glad to know that you can have your spare room back" he told her.

Brooke smirked, "Yeah, I was thinking of turning it into a second closet space…" she said as Lucas laughed. "You think I'm kidding"

"Oh I know you're serious, I have seen first hand the amount of clothes you have Brooke, it's a miracle that everything doesn't fall out on top of you when you open your wardrobe" he teased as Brooke shoved him lightly.

"Oh whatever…" she grumbled.

"I'll call you later. We can hang out." He told her casually as Brooke nodded and Lucas disappeared to get ready for the day in the attending's lounge.

She really felt for Lucas and Peyton. It was a horrible thing to have to go through, all circumstances aside. Brooke knew Lucas really cared for Peyton. They'd been through a lot together as doctors, as friends and as more than that. She knew he would always want her as a friend, but as a couple? It wasn't meant to be. They weren't right for each other. Perhaps they were just too similar.

What was still undetermined however, was whether Peyton was going to take any of this.

Peyton had been avoiding Lucas all day. She was surprised when he called her saying he wanted to talk, and then she realised that this wasn't a good thing. Lucas had made it clear he didn't want to make amends and deep down—she knew he wasn't going to change his mind. She knew what he was going to say and right now, she didn't want to hear it. She said she would talk to him, but she had been doing her best to postpone, until Lucas managed to hunt her down on the way out.

"I uh—I can't talk right now." Peyton said as she tried to walk past him, but Lucas had enough of the avoiding and the not talking. He wanted to sort this out—tonight.

"Peyton, please just listen to me!"

Peyton spun on her heel to look at him; "I don't want to listen to you because I know what you're going to say!"

"No you don't!"

"Yes, I do! You're going to say Peyton, I love you, but I love Brooke more! I'm not blind Lucas, I'm not stupid. I see the way you look at her, everyone does!" she screamed at him as he fell silent, not knowing what to say back. "See. You can't even disagree with me Lucas. So go ahead. I'm listening. Say it!"

"Peyton—I don't regret the time we've spent together. I really don't. You will always mean so much to me but—we don't work. We just can't get on the same page and we don't make each other happy and I think you know that. I don't want to lose you as a friend and I realise that we may not be able to be there for each other right away, but I really hope we can get to that point someday. So please. Let's stop this fighting, let's try and get to a better place." He insisted as his eyes filled with tears. Just because he was the one ending it, didn't mean it didn't hurt him to do so.

Peyton nodded as she wiped away her tears, "Are you really going to choose her over me?"

Lucas shook his head; "No. I'm choosing me over you." He said, making it clear that this had nothing to do with Brooke. He was removing something from his life that was making him miserable and that was that.

"What can she give you that I can't?" Peyton begged to know.

"Herself." Lucas said immediately. While he wasn't doing this for Brooke, it didn't changed that fact that he was hopelessly in love with her – and he didn't want to pretend otherwise. "She can give me herself and I can give her me. She has been a light at the end of a very dark tunnel. We had our chapter Peyton and yes, it's ended the hard, but I'll never take what we had for granted… but it's gone and we need to move on."

Peyton merely looked at her feet. She knew that he was right, but she didn't want to admit it. She also knew that he really should have been with Brooke this whole time. She was selfish and manipulative and pulled him in based on a long term friendship all because she was lonely and jealous. He deserved better and he had found better. If she really loved him, she would just let him go.

So, she did just that. She took one last look at him before turning and walking away. It was all she could do in that moment. It was all the closure she could allow herself to get. Maybe one day they could make amends and be friends, but right now - it was just too hard. Lucas had found his soulmate, and she had no one.

In the following few weeks Peyton and Lucas kept themselves to themselves. They didn't want people questioning them about where things went wrong or giving them sympathy. They just wanted to get on with things. Lucas even stayed clear of Brooke. He didn't want to rush into something straight after the end of his relationship. He knew it wasn't right and he knew it wasn't fair. Brooke was thankful of this too. She knew she rushed into things with Julian and she didn't want Lucas to make the same mistake without giving himself the time and space to really get over his relationship with Peyton.

While Brooke and Lucas kept their distance from one another, Brooke turned her attention to her relationship with Kate. They were both adults, they both knew the same pain—why couldn't they just put it all aside and be there for each other? As hard as she tried to make things work, Brooke found herself snapping one afternoon when Kate walked past her in the ICU and completely ignored her.

"Are you going to ignore me forever?" Brooke asked as Kate stopped and turned around, her face not giving away any emotions.

"I'm a little busy Brooke."

"Yeah, so am I, but I have time to acknowledge my family, you can't even look at me."

"Not now Brooke." Kate said as she turned to walk away, but Brooke called after her again.

"Is it because I look like him?" she asked as Kate froze. "Is it because I remind you of him?" she asked, wanting to know if having a living embodiment of Ted in her face every day was too much for her. Was that why she couldn't look at her? "Here's me thinking you'd want to keep whatever you could that was his around. We should be doing this together. We're family. Or at least that's what you told me. Dad is gone. My brothers and my mom are in New York. You are all that I have. Please don't shut me out anymore." Brooke begged. She couldn't believe that she was standing in front of Kate Grant, asking her to accept her.

Kate turned around and walked towards Brooke, then she pulled her in for a hug. Brooke didn't think she had ever hugged Kate in the 14 years she had known her.

"Ok." Kate simply said as Brooke felt the tension leave her body and she hugged Kate back.

Things just kept ticking along in Raleigh Med, with nothing major or significant happening. Brooke was still working exceptionally hard to get onto her neuro fellowship and she was slowly but surely getting there. She was every neuro attending's resident of choice, so there wasn't really much more she could do. Brooke did find it a little strange that things were so quiet in her life. Kate and Rachel were getting along, Lucas was barely speaking to her, but not through fault of her own, and her friends and family were doing well. It was almost uneasy that everything was ok, but she was determined to make it last for as long as possible.

One evening as she was cleaning up around the house, there was a knock at the door. As she opened it, she was surprised to see Lucas on the other side of it. They had barely spoken to one another in over a month, but he was growing more and more frustrated with not speaking to her. He needed to make she was doing ok. He needed to be in her life, so he decided to make a bold move. He'd always advocated making bold moves after all - he figured it was time he followed his own advice.

"Hey" he greeted quietly.

"Hey" she replied, unsure what to say next.

"Are you alone?"

"Yeah, Kate took Maya to visit her mom for the next little while and Rachel is at Johnny's." Brooke told him.

Lucas nodded as he looked at his hands.

"Do you—do you want to come in?" Brooke asked, seeing that he was too afraid to ask.

Lucas nodded again as Brooke moved out of the way of the door and let him into the house. He slowly followed her into the kitchen, not really knowing what to say. He watched her as she lifted some glasses and poured him a glass of water. It was more so she had something to do rather than just awkwardly standing there, staring, not having any clue how to approach everything that had been going on.

"I uh—I know we haven't really spoken in the past while—" Lucas began.

Brooke held up her hand; "Lucas, seriously, it's ok. You were going through some pretty big stuff, I don't think talking to me would have really helped that." she made clear. She missed him immensely, but she also understood that this was probably for the best. It wasn't fair to anyone for them to jump into something so quickly. They had been quick the first time and it had back fired massively.

"That's the thing" Lucas began; "through everything, you were the only person I wanted to talk to."

Brooke gulped as she realised she and Lucas were finally going to have to come clean with one another. They were finally going to have to fess up to all the feelings that had been brewing inside them.

"You were staying in my house." Brooke began as Lucas give her a minute to gather her thoughts and continue. "There's this unspoken thing between us and it's weird. It's super weird and I don't know why I do this to myself, you dumped me, rather publicly I might add, I don't know why I'm holding onto probably getting my heart broken again. I had this great guy propose to me, but I couldn't do it." She said, trying to understand the whole thing herself in that moment.

"It's all really complicated—"

"I know—"

"And I know it's so wrong but God—I want you Brooke. I want you so bad it consumes me. I've been moping around the hospital not just because it's over with Peyton but because I don't know if I would ever have another chance with you because God knows I don't deserve it. I didn't end things with Peyton because of you. I did it for me, but I wanted you to be there at the end of it all." He made clear as he started to walk towards her, but she found herself pulling back.

"I'm not going to be your rebound Lucas."

"You're not. If we both just wanted to feel better, we would have done this a lot sooner." Lucas pointed out.

Brooke kept backing away until she had hit the wall and there was nowhere to go. She looked up at Lucas as his intense blue eyes gazed into hers. "How can I trust you?" she asked in a whisper as Lucas's nose brushed hers.

"I've been the only person you've really trusted over the last year. Why should that change now?"

He was right. He had been everything to her over the past year and right in this moment—he was everything to her now.

"No more games Brooke. No more confusion. No more heart ache. I'm the guy for you Brooke Davis and I know I hurt you the last time-"

Brooke cautiously stood on her the tips of her toes and delicately kissed him, waiting for him to respond - which he immediately did. His hands found her hair as he took complete control of the kiss. They kissed like they had never kissed anybody before, the kissed with all the longing that was in their hearts. They didn't realise just how much they missed each other's touch until that moment.

Their passion for one another took over as Lucas ferverently kissed her, scooped her up in his arms and carried her upstairs, ready to show her just how he felt.

Two weeks later, Kate had returned from her extended trip to visit her mom. When she got home, she'd realised just how tired she was and the rest and relaxation was just what she needed to feel better. While she was there, it had also given her time to think. She'd been watching silently from the side lines for the past year as Brooke started to let Lucas back in again. She'd watched as she'd pined after him and he'd pined after her and Kate had said nothing. She didn't think it was her place. But she knew all too well how short life could be and she didn't want Brooke to waste time not being with the people she loved.

"Welcome home!" Brooke greeted happily as she hugged Kate and said hi to Maya. "Can I get you anything?" Brooke asked as they walked into the living room.

"I'm fine, sit down, I need to tell you something." Kate insisted as Brooke sat opposite her, a little confused. "I just spent two weeks back home just… thinking. I realised - there's a lot of things people don't say to each other that they should. So I need you to hear me when I say this. I know that you have been really hurt in the past. But I also know, and I have known for a long time that Lucas Scott loves you with all that is in him. 'Shout from the roof stops, write romantic letters to' loves you. Don't run from that. Life is far too short to run from what makes us most happy."

Brooke gulped unsure what to say. She was completely surprised by Kate's words. She knew that despite everything, she loved Lucas with all that was in her, but it was difficult to accept that he might actually feel the same way. Over the past few weeks, they'd been going on a few dates, they'd kissed, but the night they spent together hadn't been repeated. She was so scared to jump back into something, even though she had a funny feeling it would be the best choice she ever made.

It didn't take long for Brooke to realise that in that moment, she had to run to him. She didn't really know what she was going to say to him, but she knew she needed to see him, to be near him, to love him.

She knocked on the door of his newly purchased condo and a brief moment later, the door swung open and Lucas was surprised to see Brooke standing there.

"Hi" she greeted softly.

Lucas softened his stance and smiled at her; "Hi" he replied, before moving aside and letting her in. She looked at him for a moment, before she stood on her toes and kissed him, causing him to smile against her lips, eliciting a giggle from her.

"What was that for?" he asked as he wrapped his arm securely around her waist.

"I just really love you." She said as Lucas looked at her, a little surprised. They'd never said it the first time round, and a part of him was glad they didn't – because it made this moment ten times more special.

"You do, huh?" he asked with a smile as Brooke nodded her head and Lucas held her cheeks softly in his hands. "Well… I love you" he said as he delicately kissed her right cheek. "So much" he said as he slowly moved to kiss her left cheek. Brooke closed her eyes in an attempt to control her emotions and also to just be in this tender moment with him. "I love your brain" he said as he kissed her forehead, "I love your body…" he teased as Brooke let out a little laugh and he kissed the tip of her nose. "and most of all - I love your soul" he said as he tilted his head and finally kissed her lips. They wrapped their arms around each other, never wanted to release themselves from this moment, but they also knew that they could – because what they had would be forever. Their timing was finally right and Brooke knew they would love each other until the day they died.

She was more than ready for the rest of her life to begin right now.

The following day, Brooke was walking through the hospital when she spotted Lucas working at one of the computers to the side of the hallway. She walked over to him with a soft smile.

"Hey, how's it going?" Brooke asked as she stood behind him.

Lucas smirked, more than happy to see her right now; "It's going good. What are you up to?"

"I uh—I have an hour before I need to be in surgery again, I was thinking of taking a nap in the on-call room. You look tired, you should join me." She said with a suggestive smirk.

"You should really be a little more direct with your intentions Dr. Davis. I would hate for you to lead me astray..."

Brooke started to back away from Lucas; "Well, I guess you'll just have to come to the on-call room, if you want to know my intentions."

She then turned around and deliberately snaked her hips in a way that made Lucas go crazy. He quickly closed what he was going on the computer and followed her to the on-call room.

A little while later, Lucas was lying on the bed with a grin on his face as Brooke sat up and began to put her scrubs back on,

"You know… I think we'd make good sex buddies." Brooke joked. After everything they'd said to each other last night, she didn't mean it in the slightest, but there was no harm in teasing, right?

Lucas raised an eyebrow; "Seriously?"

"Oh yeah. We're both hot, we have incredible sex… maybe sex buddies is the way forward. Then you can actually find the head space to get over Peyton." Brooke suggested—only a little bit seriously.

"I am over Peyton—"

"Where have I heard that before? Oh yeah, before you left me for her at the gala." She teased.

"My god, you are mean." He teased back.

"That's why you love me right?" she said as she straddled his lap again, resting her hands on either side of his head as her hair fell around her face.

Lucas smiled as he leaned up and began kissing down Brooke's neck, causing her resolve to weaken. "Your meanness is one of the many, many reasons that I love you…" He joked. "I love that you're never afraid to stand up for yourself." He said, twisting the meanness trait to fit Brooke perfectly.

Brooke smiled as Lucas rolled them over, so he could have better access to her neck.

Brooke closed her eyes in pure ecstasy. He was barely doing anything yet he made her feel so alive. "You love me." She repeated.

Lucas lifted his head and looked at her lying beneath him. She was looked angelic. "I do. I love you Brooke Davis. More than I could ever express."

"You never told me that when we were together." Brooke said quietly.

"It kinda—it kinda scared me and then I was an ass and, well, you know the rest" he said as Brooke playfully rolled her eyes. "But I mean it Brooke."

Brooke smiled softly; "I love you too."

"I did something" Brooke said quietly to Rachel as she approached her at the nurse's station later that day. She wanted to tell her best friend about this more than anything, but she was nervous what she might say. She really cared what Rachel thought and she trusted her implicitly - she wanted her support in her relationship.

"… what kind of something?"

"The kind of something that I feel really good and sure about but I'm not sure you're going to feel the same..." She said, leaving Rachel completely confused.

"Ok… well, what did you do?" Rachel asked.

"I may or may not have gotten back together with a certain hospital owning plastic surgeon…" Brooke said as she tried to hide the blush on her cheeks and Rachel gasped.

"Oh my god Brooke Penelope Davis!" she exclaimed as Brooke pulled her into the side room so they didn't draw attention to themselves. "Way to go!" Rachel suddenly encouraged as Brooke looked at her confused. "How long has this been going on?!"

"Uh – maybe two weeks? But officially only last night cause I was sort of avoiding really talking about but then Kate made me see sense and here we are" Brooke said with an awkward shrug and a little laugh. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, it's all just been a bit weird but – I love him so much Rachel and I really hope you can be happy for us."

"Brookie" Rachel said as she hugged her best friend tightly. "I am so beyond happy for you because I know how happy you are when you're with him. I can see the way he looks at you. I can see how much he loves you and something tells me he's learned from his mistakes. You're finally getting your happy ending Davis. Enjoy it." She finished in a whisper as Brooke hugged her that little bit tighter, feeling more thankful than ever for what she had.

Yayyyyy!! Things start moving pretty quickly for Brucas now... but when you know, you know - right!?