Chapter 46
Hey everyone, so I realized after reading through my story that I had actually lost Chapter 46. It's on my computer however it's a tad corrupted, So I'm retyping everything. luckily it's still there so I don't have to try to remember everything I wrote, since it has been so long since I wrote it. So here's the lost chapter including the original A/N...Hiya everyone! It's been such a long time. I'm really sorry. A lot of crap has been going on. Family trouble, financial issues, yaknow, boring real world crap. I've also been working my ass off lately in other things. Anyway, Last time we left off Raven had just finished her session with Leland, with a lot on her mind. What will the outcome be? What fate shall our favorite witch choose? Fing out here. ONWARD TO THE BATTLE FIELD!
Raven was in deep thought as she walked Gotham's streets. What Leland had said to her about having a choice in all this still echoed in her mind. For years she'd felt like someone else was laying her life out for her. That she didn't have anything but the illusion of choice in her life. The ciry of Gotham, where she now lived, was a choice made by her parents. Nevermind that it was a breeding ground for criminals and crazies. Never mind the fact that Raven had given her parents how much better Metropolise City was. Gotham was what her father and mother had chosen, Raven's opinion be damned.
Then a miracle from hell happened. She'd gotten accepted into Gotham academy for having good enough grades. The only problem was she hadn't ever applied. Instead her mother had filled out the application FOR her. Mrs. Bleu had decided that it would be a "good way" to help Raven get into a good college while subsequently boost her "low self esteem." Translation to Raven; her mother wanted her to lose the black clothes and meloncholy music and become quote-unquote "normal."
Raven had dreaded attending the frumpy school, filled with the offspring of Gotham City's Elites. Nothing but a bunch of stuck up snobby rich kids. Oh but how good it would look on a college education. Raven always felt that it was just her parents way of becoming friends with wealthy people. Obviously it didn't work as she didn't attend for very long. The moment she set foot on campos to pick up her uniform, the rumors flew. Things from how a poor country bumpkin like her got into such a prestigious school, to rumors about her being easy because she dressed the way she did. It only took a week before Raven ended up bloodying some preppy jock boy's nose. The following day she was expelled. Apparently Gotham Academy had a zero tollerance policy for violence. Never mind that the jock boy had been the one to instigate it by asking how much it cost to "ride the new girl." The unknown boy wasn't even suspended.
'There is no sense in dwelling in the past, Raven dearest.' Cherie's voices echoed in her head as she walked past a coffee house. The smell of over priced burnt coffee filled Raven's nose as she shrugged.
"Who's dwelling? I didn't even wanna go to that stuck up school anyway." She said aloud. She stopped when she noticed a group of people sitting outside the coffee house, snickering and pointing towards her. Raven felt her face grow hot as she quickly covered up the rainbows and star sweater. She decided to pick up the pace and quickly rushed past them to HAven house.
~0~
Raven groaned as she walked into the entrance of the halfway house. It had taken her an hour to walk back from her session with docter Leland. An hour of people staring at her the whole way. Of course she was very much used to being stared at. She was under no illusions that her usual way of dressing wasn't exactly normal. Dressing Goth wasn't normal. she knew that. However, at least in her usual attire she felt like herself. she felt, what was to her, normal. Though, she was extremely gratful to Sue-sue for lending her clothes out. After all the only thing she had left was the red dress that URiah had put her in and there was no way in hell she was going to wear that again. Terrible memories aside, the dress was practically in ribbons.
"Come to think it, I don't really need magic to set the damn thing on fire now do I?" She mumbled to herself. Cherie looked up at her and flicked his tail.
'I would not advise such an action Raven dearest. least you be sent back.' was all the advice he'd offered. Raven huffed.
"What? I can't just throw it into the furnace?" She asked. Cherie said nothing, just let out a low growl in response. "I was kidding, jeeze."
Raven was so engrossed with her conversation with Cherie, she hadn't noticed the group of girls watching her.
"Are you talking to your cat?" a familiar voice asked hautily. Raven snapped out of her converation and looked to see Brit giving her a look as if she were insane. Raven bit her lip and tried to think of a good enough story, or else she'd be revealed to be a meta-human. A term in which she hated.
"Uhm, no." She said, crossing her arms and frowning. 'Oh yeah. that was a great response.' She thought to herself sarcastically. Raven then watched as Brit and her companions walked up to her.
"I saw you!" She shouted, pointing her gloved finger towards Raven. "You were talking to your cat as if it could talk back!"
"Nope." Raven snapped. She continued to deny it in the hopes that Brit would believe her and just go away. Sadly it didn't work, as Brit was soon standing directly infront of her. She stared down her nose at her as if Raven were radioactive. Raven, however, remained defiant and returned her stare with a glare.
"You act like some kind of weirdo." Brit spat, "Where did you go today?"
"That's none of your business Prissy." Raven spat back, "Now leave me alone."
Raven then stepped past the girl and made her way to her shared room. What was that chick's deal anyway? She rolled her eyes as she heard Brit talking amongst her gaggle of followers.
"She's obviously hiding something." She heard Brit say. High school or halfway house; some things just never changed, Raven thought to herself as she climbed the stairs only to be ambushed by a much more welcoming face. Sue-sue seemed to be in full on joy-mode when she saw Raven and Cherie. Even going as far as to hug them on sight, something Raven had yet to get used to.
"Welcome back roomie." Sue-sue welcomed cheerfully. "How was your time in town?"
"Good, I guess. Not exactly a lot to report." RAven mumbled. Sue-sue smiled and watched Raven go over to her bed and plop down. Cherie, having hopped down from Raven's shoulders, now curled up on the pale yellow pillow at the head of her bed.
"So, is he like, a therapy pet?" Sue-sue asked. Raven propped herself up on her elbows and scowled.
"What?"
"A Therapy pet. For anxiety or something? I saw an artical about how people have pets like that." She explained. Raven looked to Cherie, who in turned opened an eye to look back. She paused for a moment to think over the idea. She then laughed.
"Yeah, I guess you could call him something like that." She said. Sue-sue smiled again.
"I was just curious." She said as she moved toward her own bed. "I see him with you, like, all the time."
There was a pause between the two before Sue-sue spoke again.
"So what does he help you with?"
"What?"
"Cherie, silly. You said he was a therapy pet. So what does he help you with?" She asked again. Raven pursed her lips.
"You ask a lot of personal questions. yaknow that?" She said, perhaps a bit too harshly. Sue-sue looked down at her hands as she grew very quiet.. Raven bit her lip then flopped down on her back again. her dark blue hair standing out against the pale yellow bedding.
"Anger. I guess." She mumbled as she stared up at the cieling. "Guess you can see how well that's going."
"So you have ander issues?" Sue-sue asked, returning to her usual chipperness. From inside of her head Raven heard Cherie snort.
'Oh sweet child. you have so little an idea.' this statement prompted Raven to give him a sideways glance. Which he responded to by rolling over and showing his back to her. the sound of his amusment echoing in her mind.
"Uh, yeah." Raven mumbled, not moving from her spot. she heard the bed springs from bed of Sue-sue's side of the room creek.
"Don't worry. You'll get the hang of it." She said. her voice so full of positive energy. It seemed like nothing in the world could bring Sue-sue down. Her happiness and joy just sort of rolled off of her in waves. "And with Cherie with you, I'm sure it'll be much easier."
Though despite how annoyingly cheery she was, it didn't really bother Raven all that much. If anything, she found Sue-sue's positivity refreshing. It was nice to be around someone so cheerfull. It somewhat counteracted her own negatie moodiness. She actually kind of liked it.
'That much is obvious, my dear Raven.' Cherie's voice mewed. Raven rolled her eyes
"Uhm. Raven?" Sue-sue's voice broke her from her train of thought. "Did you fall asleep?"
"What? No, sorry. I um... I spaced out." She admitted. Sue-sue laughed.
"I said you'll get the hand of it." She said, "WE all do eventually."
"You ever have anger issues?"
"Um, well...no." Sue-sue mumbled, "But I know you'll get through it."
Raven laughed, "Thanks for the vote of confidence."
~0~
Raven ran as fast as she could down a long dark hallway. She didn't know what was chasing her, just that she desparately needed to get away from it. As fast as possible and as fr away as possible. It radiated rage and hatred and somehow it seemed to always be on her heels. No matter how far or fast she ran it was always right behind her. Ash she continued running she noticed the hallway getting narrower and narrower. The walls began to close in on her and just when she starting to gain some distand from whatever it was chaing her, she tripped. It didn't take long for the darkness was upon her. Enveloping her in a sea of black. She couldn't see anyting. She couldn't hear anything. It was quiet for a long time. It reminded her of the hellish dimension she'd been imprisoned it.
Raven had never been afraid of the dark, not even as a child. In fact she had always found great comfort in it. She could hide in it and be alone, nothing could hurt her in her own little darkness. This, however. This was terrifying. She was alone and felt so small with the threat of monsters so imminent. Mosnters that would eat her, sould and all and leave nothing behind to prove she ever existed. She wanted so desparatly to escape. To feel the sun on her dark skin again. To never ve afraid of monsters that wanted to devour her again.
A voice echoed in the darkness, but Raven avoided it. No doubt it was a monster wanting to eat her. They always played tricks to get her attention To being her out of hiding. They'd pretend to be familiar faces. People she cared about, people she loved. It was never them, however. No one would ever come. Noe one cared about her. No one ever did.
"Raven?"
~0~
"Raven! Wake up!" Sue-sue's voice ran loud and clear. Raven gasped as her eyes focused on her face, which was filled with such concern. "Are you ok?"
Raven was quiet for a while before responding with a nod as she ran a shaking hand through her hair. "I...I'm fine. Just...just another nightmare."
Sue-sue sat back on the bed as Raven sat up. A cold sweat had started to form on her forehead. Cherie looked up at her with worry. He had seen what happened in Raven's mind. He hadn't experienced the pocket world with Raven. Jason Blood and the demon Etrigan hadn't found him, he'd escaped thanks to Raven. So he had no idea of anything that had happened to his master. Now, however, he'd caught a small glimpse of what she'd suffered. silently he craled onto Raven's lap and was quickly enveloped in Raven's arms.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"What?!" Raven snapped unintentionally. Sue-sue flinched, but gave a soft, kind smile.
"Do you want to talk about it?" She repeated, placing her hand on Raven's knee. "Sometimes it helps to talk about your nightmares."
"No." Raven said dryly. Sue-sue's smile dropped as she nodded silently and stood to leave. She was stopped however, when Raven grabbed hold of her pajama sleeve. She looked down at Raven who only stared straight ahead.
"But..." She hesitated. Chewing on her bottom lip for a moment before slowly looking up at her room mate, "...but could we talk about something else?"
Sue-sue smiled warmly and sat back down in front of her. "Of course Raven. Anything you need."
So this chapter originally took about a month to write. back then I was experiencing some serious writters block as well as some computer issues. Actually I'm STILL experiencing computer issues. the computer I own now is basically a glorified tablet, with just as much memory space. I can't even run a proper word document on this thing and have been using notepad for everything, which doesn't exactly have any sort of spell check, which for me is very important. I have my entire computer on an external hard drive, and I think before that my computer had a virus. which may have explained the corrupted file. Also back then I was oing through a lot of weird shit, some of which I'm still experiencing. I hope this clears up any confusion in regards to the weird jump between chapters. I was unaware this chapter was even missing until I happened to revisit the story tonight. which is when I decided to transcribe the whole chapter that originally took one or more months to type in one night. it's currently 2am as I'm typing this A/N. I think I'll take a well deserved rest after this. see you all in the future chapters.