Second Chances

by AVR92

Everyone has second chances in life.

When you go from having everything to nothing right in front of you is like everything has been ripped away because of the lies and secrets that you've told … Doesn't matter how long ago the lies or secrets were told but it destroys your life in the future. You might not be punished for it when it happened but lies find a way of getting the truth out and secrets can soon be revealed to those that you don't want to know.

I however, have always told the truth even when it hurts. And yes, I've told lies in the past like who took the last bit of chocolate or the last bit of the milk but never told a lie that I could never handle … I've always had the best interest of the people I care about and I've always made sure that they looked after but my whole world was torn away from me in seconds, I went from laughing and being the happiness I had ever been to having it turn to sad, cold and bitter hate towards life.

I had cried all the tears I could but my heart was still crying of pain and horror … I watch myself, falling from a tall tower but no one to catch me when I hit the bottom. The room around me is so still and no sounds are being made apart from the crying heart that pains me. I lie in my bed not wanting to let people fear my pain or hear the breaking voice box, not really wanting to be comfort not even by my own husband who is unfortunately dealing with his own pain.

As months go by; I and my husband are still feeling the pain that crushes us both but arguing about everything, to being a fake happy couple to the world beyond our home.I sadly, watch wizards and witches pass my office being all happy and chirpy. It's a day like this, I really wish my best friend was here to lift me and tell me something I need to hear only he knows what to do but not being able to see him for 3 months, keeping the wizarding world safe was more important but then he is one to know what to do.

My other best friend is my husband who I no longer want to be around because the arguing and heart still are not bringing us together … The healer spoke about it, taking time and letting the dust set between us and that we won't feel like this forever. The families have tried to keep us from falling apart but whenever we seem to be in the same room, we cry and shout blame at each other. I know a few of the families have tried to reach out to our other best friend but knowing there's nothing he can do until he is back.

We spend a great deal of time away from each other and spend it with friends unlike me, I spend most of my evenings and days away from the world not wanting the "Poor you" look or I go and see my mother-in-law who helps me keep my mind at ease. Sometimes, my husband will appear for his dinner obviously not wanting to be alone or have the silent suffering.

I've come home from work a few times to find that he has invited friends over … I've been offered to join but not really wanting to so I make my way to the bedroom and hide away for the night, letting the tears fall down my face and hugging myself to sleep. One afternoon, he had invited family over and all I wanted to do is sleep and get through this painful day without shedding a tear but instead, I snap and argue with my husband.

As I arrive in my office this morning and letting a big sigh out in hope that something will make me happy again but nothing apart from work and reports to file and sort out that will keep my mind busy and away from my negative thoughts. I still watching everyone around me, being happy and cheerful about life … I sighed as I looked into my lunch, not feeling very hungry. I pushed it away in hoping it will disappear as I turned to look back at the paperwork.

"Well, if you're hoping it will disappear then you are mistakenly wrong unless you cast it away" He spoke.

My head shot up as I couldn't quite believe what I was hearing or seeing … I saw him and I stood up, feeling my eyes watering already I slowly made my way to him and he hugged me. I could feel my heart, beating fast and my tears falling leaving a wet patch on his shirt.

"Hey" He chuckled, as we pulled out of the hug and he tried looking into my eyes but I held onto his arms. "I don't need a wet patch"

I chuckled slightly, hugging him again. I think we must have stayed like this for a while before he took us out and sat us in a quiet corner of the Leaky Cauldron … I watched him as he got us some drinks, I saw him talking to people that were happy to see him and were wanting his attention but he was making it clear, he had other priorities to attend to and came over to me.

We sat quietly for what seemed forever; I wonder if he knew, of course he knew … He's our best friend who loves us both dearly. I wonder if he could feel my pain or at least see my pain.

"How was your trip Harry?" I asked, not wanting to talk about my pain.

He shrugged his shoulders. "You know how it is Mione, fighting for your life and wanting to make it back alive at least I won't have to go away again like that for a good few months unless otherwise"

I smiled slightly at this which soon turned into a not a smile, looking out of the window seeing people chatting away and making plans. He took one of my hands into his and spoke. "I'm so sorry"

I could feel the tears coming as he spoke to me … I couldn't look at him, I couldn't let him know I was in pain but how stupid is he? What did he have to be sorry for? It's not his fault things have happened. I just nodded and wiped my tears away with my free hand and faced him with a smile.

"That's great news, Harry" I tried not to cry.

"Hermione, please look at me" Harry begged, holding my hand tight.

I slowly turned to look at him as the tears fell down my face. Harry sat closer to me and hugged me tight to him … Harry could feel my pain and he felt helpless, I cried a lot that afternoon and Harry just held me in his arms. When we did pull away from each other and Harry looked around and saw it was nearly empty.

"Okay, so the plan is to get something stronger and we can talk," Harry said.

I nodded as I wiped the tears away. It wasn't long before Harry came back with two glasses of butterbeer and two glasses of firewhiskey.

"Have you seen him?" I asked.

I looked at Harry and he nodded.

I nodded and down my firewhiskey and spoke. "What do you know Harry?"

"I know you're in pain Hermione and I know you've shut everyone out," Harry answered. I stayed silent. "Hermione, I'm so sorry I wasn't here for you and Ron, I'm sorry I couldn't fix it"

I let more tears down. "How could you have possibly fixed it?"

Harry shook his head. "I don't know but…"

"He's gone Harry" I cried. "He's gone"

Harry nodded, letting his eyes fill with water. "I know"

"It hurts" I cried more. "It hurts that I can't cuddle him, I can't feed him, I can't watch him grow into a boy"

"What happened?" Harry asked.

I shook my head. "He fell asleep and never woke up again, I let Ron go out with Dean and Seamus while I stayed at home with our baby boy, I watched him fall asleep…"

"Please don't" Harry muttered, letting tears fall.

I shook my head. "No I need to" I choked as the tears fell even harder. "I watched him fall asleep, I went to bed and I thought, wow he had slept through the night at 2 weeks old but no"

Harry took one of my hands as I continued. "He was so cold Harry" I cried, making everyone look at us. "He was so cold and still"

**Harry's Pov**

At this point; some of our friends had walked in and heard Hermione … I saw Ron, standing there. I could see the saddest in the eyes as Hermione broke down in front of me.

"Hermione" I said.

"Bring him back Harry" Hermione cried.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and hugged Hermione tight to me. "You know I can't" I whispered which made Hermione cry harder.

"Please don't leave again Harry" Hemione begged.

I chuckled slightly at this. "You know I can't promise that but what I can promise is that I will be here for you and Ron" I responded.

Hermione looked at me. "Tell me, it gets easier Harry"

I sighed and shook my head. "It doesn't but in time, it will heal and he will just be a memory"

At this point; Ginny and Dean came over to us and I stood up to greet them. I shook Dean's hand and gave Ginny a kiss on the cheek and a hug. Ginny sat down with Hermione.

"Great healer isn't he?" Ginny asked Hermione who chuckled at this.

Everyone sat down and I got the drinks in with Ron.

"How did you get her to talk like that?" Ron asked as he looked at Hermione.

I sighed as I looked at her. "It's easy when I've lost so many people" I answered. "Just give it time and space, she'll be okay"

Ron nodded. "I just want to help her Harry"

"I know mate but nothing you can do, maybe you two could do with time away?" I suggested.

"Yeah maybe if she would come with me" Ron spoke.

"Talk to her Ron" I said.

"Thanks mate, I knew she would open to you" Ron responded.

With that conversation over; we went and sat down with the others and just chatted, everyone was pleased to see me back well and alive … I watched Hermione who obviously hasn't smiled for a long time but who could blame her, she tragically lost her only child which can't be replaced in a heartbeat.

I remember getting Ginny's owl the day Hermione and Ron had lost their son; I wanted to come straight back and be here for both of them but the mission was important and I had no other choice which I really hope Hermione and Ron understands … I would get regular owls from Ginny and Molly, worrying about Hermione and Ron's marriage. I would owl them back and say, I will be home soon.

As weeks went by and I watched my best friends grieve and cry over the loss that had obviously destroyed their happiness together. I remember only last week, I had come over to the Burrows for dinner and Molly who was like a second mother to had made a huge fuss over me and was happy to see me back but during the time I spent there … I saw an argument between Ron and Hermione which was quite upsetting to see but being informed by Molly and Arthur that this is happening quite a bit.

The argument would be that Hermione wants to be left alone to her thoughts and Ron didn't want to leave her alone … All he wants to do is be her husband and comfort her and help heal her pain but from what I've learnt over these last few weeks is that Hermione and Ron haven't been sleeping together, Hermione would spend hours at work and only go home when has fallen asleep on the couch or in bed and when they were together, Hermione would be arguing with Ron.

"She won't let him in Harry" Ginny said, in a concerning voice.

I felt sad hearing Ginny say that; it reminded me of how me and her lost our baby … The pain was unbearable, unfortunately for us our baby never got to even be born. Ginny miscarried at 14 weeks … I couldn't even be here for Ginny to help her grieve but when I did come home, things were different and feelings were gone and we knew it but as I look at Hermione and Ron, I want them to be able to get through this and not give up like me and Ginny did.

I smiled weakly at Ginny, squeezing her hand. "It will heal in time" I whispered.

Ginny had tears forming from her eyes, threatening to fall down her face. "I know"

I continued to look at Ginny and saw the ring on her finger. Yes, I let her go and we gave up our relationship of 6 years because of the loss of our unborn child but also Ginny always said she felt alone even when I would owl her when I could but when I let her go, she found love with someone else and I found that hard because I still loved Ginny with everything in me but Ginny got married and had a child with Dean Thomas.

When the arguing would stop; Ron final words would be 'fine have it your way' and apparate away from the Burrows, leaving Hermione to break down in tears and scream. This broke me to see this happening … I was about to go out there but Ginny held me back.

"Don't do it Harry" Ginny spoke softly. "Leave her to cry it out"

I nodded as Ginny let me go but I ignored her and made my way outside to give Hermione a hug.

It's been a few weeks and things have been busy in the Auror Departments; being sent away to these missions for 3 days or a week … I would take advantage and stay in the office late at night to finish the work as it was due in and Kingsley would come be asking me about it. I'm finding myself here most evenings when everyone else has gone home … Sometimes, it is really nice because I haven't got any distractions like Seamus always coming in my office and telling his jokes or problems that he has with his wife Leanne or I haven't got the stress of the young Aurors that are still in training.

I sometimes wonder about life outside the Auror Department; obviously I had a life with Ginny but she's been off the scene for 2 years and has moved on with her life with Dean Thomas, got married and had a baby with him. But here I am with a bottle of firewhiskey, going through weeks worth of paperwork. I'm actually working on the paperwork of the one I was on for 3 months which meant quite a bit of details, I had managed to do some of it when I wasn't protecting or fighting or hunting. But I had to leave most of it until I got back here.

"Still here Mr. Potter" I heard Kingsley say.

I looked up and slouched back in the chair. "Yeah I thought I would seem I've got piles of paperwork to get through" I answered.

Kingsley nodded. "Very dedicated Auror"

I smiled. "Thanks Kingsley"

"Well don't stay here too late, it's alright 9:40pm" Kingsley spoke.

I nodded. "I'll finish this and then go home" I informed.

Kingsley nodded and left. I sat back up and continued to work … It was only a little later, I heard a noise outside the office but as I looked up no one was there so I looked back down and then I saw a shadow in the doorway, I looked up to see her.

"Harry, what are you still doing here?" Hermione asked.

I chuckled. "Paperwork, could ask you the same?"

Hermione held up the files. "Same"

I laughed slightly and got another glass. "Have a drink with me, Hermione"

Hermione nodded and sat in the chair opposite me; I handed her the glass and the slouched back in my chair, taking a sip of my firewhiskey … Hermione took a sip of hers and then looked around the room, she noticed a photo on the wall and got up to look at it … It was a photo of me, her and Ron back at Hogwarts, all smiling and laughing.

She looked around at the other photos in my office; I watched her, picked up a photo and it was a picture of her, Ron and the baby … It was one that Ginny had sent me when Hermione and Ron had returned home, I remember rushing to over to their home to meet the little boy … He was only a few hours old when I held him for the first time. It was when Hermione and Ron had asked me to Godfather and I happily accepted. Unfortunately, it was only a few days later; Kingsley had told me that I was going on a mission for a few months … I had popped by to see Hermione and Ron but Ron wasn't there but I spoke to Hermione and held the baby boy before heading off.

Then I remember getting that owl just two weeks after being gone from Ginny that Hermione and Ron's baby has passed away … My heart was shattered for them, I wished I had been here for them through this difficult time which is obviously still a very difficult time for them as since I've been back all I've seen is Hermione and Ron argue, Hermione spends most evenings working late or they would be home but in away from each other … I only know this because Ron talks to me, Ginny has confided in me.

I stood up and walked over to Hermione who looked at me. "You still have a photo?"

I nodded. "I didn't have the heart to get rid of it" I answered.

I could see eyes were watery and Hermione failing to let them fall down her face. She put the photo down before downing the rest of her firewhiskey and giving me the glass.

"Another one?" I offered.

Hermione nodded. "Please"

I poured Hermione another glass and handed it to her before leaning against my desk and watching her. "Why are you not at home with Ron?" I asked.

"Needed to get some work done" Hermione answered, knowing I know she could have left it. "Why are you here?"

I was surprised that Hermione asked me. "Well being away for 3 months, not being able to look at these reports and get them filed … I'm here catching up" I responded.

Hermione chuckled. "Stupid question"

"Well I could be here because I've got nothing else to do" I said, downing my firewhiskey.

"My god Harry, what has life come to for us?" Hermione asked. "We should be out, partying and having fun but here we are, drinking firewhiskey and working on overdue reports"

I laughed. "What else do you suggest Hermione?"

Hermione smirked and got her wand out; changed my outfit so I was suitable for going out and she did the same with her clothes and smiled at me.

"Let's go" Hermione said, taking my hand.

We got into the Muggle world in the middle of London and found a club; we went inside and I got us a couple drinks and we found somewhere to sit … We were watching people dancing and laughing, I could tell Hermione wanted to go and dance but not alone, I offered my hand.

"Come on!" I yelled so she could hear me.

We got up and we danced with each other; I had never seen Hermione so happy and alive … This was taking her mind of things, she wasn't thinking about what has been going on, she was letting her hair down and just being free to smile. As we continued to dance with each other, Hermione put her hands on my shoulders and continued to move her hips, I put my hands on her hips … It was only when the song ended and changed to another one, we got some more drinks and found somewhere to catch other breaths.

"Thanks for coming Harry" Hermione laughed, taking a sip of her drink.

I smiled and nodded. "It just nice to see you laughing again Hermione"

Hermione smiled and leaned over to kiss me on the cheek but caught my lips, we didn't break away … I pulled Hermione closer and deepened our kiss before breaking for air. We were silent for a few minutes before Hermione sat back slightly. She was confused … I could tell by her facial expression.

"Um, let's go and dance again" Hermione spoke, loudly taking my hand.

I didn't have time to respond; we were in the middle of the dancefloor, dancing with each other again but not for long before Hermione had lips against mine again, this time it was longer and more passionate … Hermione put her arms around my neck and I pulled her close to me so our chest was touching, we continued to kiss each other hungrily before we broke for air again and I put my forehead against hers.

"Hermione" I breathed.

"I love you Harry" Hermione said, tearfully.

I kissed her on the forehead. "I love you too" I replied.

We soon left and we went back to mine; Hermione had passed out on the sofa … I sent an owl to Ron and told him that Hermione was with me and that she was okay. I sat in the chair just watching her sleep … My god, how could I have let this happen? Why did I kiss her? She's my best friend and my other best friend's wife who is grieving for her baby. I didn't want this to happen, it wasn't my intention. I sighed as I replayed the kiss in my head until I fell asleep.

The next morning; I woke up to find Hermione still asleep on the sofa, I sighed as I got up to put the kettle on and make some coffee for us and put some pancakes on … Hermione had soon woke up and came into the kitchen as I put the plate down on the table and she sat down as I sat with her. We ate our breakfast in silence, I didn't know what to say to her or what to do but Hermione soon spoke.

"Does Ron know where I am?" Hermione asked.

I nodded. "Yeah I owled him as soon as we got back here"

Hermione smiled weakly. "I'm so sorry Harry"

I shook my head. "All forgotten"

Hermione hugged me tight before pulling away and getting herself together. "I better go home, I'll see you at work" Hermione said, tearfully.

I just nodded and Hermione left. I had got myself showered and dressed for work as I got to my office … I cleared the two glasses away and put the firewhiskey away and sat behind my desk and continued to work. It was noisy out there now as it was nearly lunchtime … I couldn't focus today, just couldn't stop thinking about what could have happened between me and Hermione last night and what I did let happen last night but Hermione seems to have pushed it aside not really wanting to deal with it but as she came to my mind.I had a knock on the door; I shot my head up to see Hermione standing there with a smile.

"Want to get out of here?" Hermione asked.

I sighed and looked at the paperwork before looking back up at Hermione and nodded … We took the rest of the day off and spent it together, we eventually went back to my flat with a takeaway and beer. We sat and watched a film and chatted for a bit, we were laughing with each other. Things weren't awkward at all and it was like nothing had happened last night which is probably a good thing.

But as I got up to get me and Hermione another drink; Hermione had followed me in with the plates to put in the sink and we came face to face, eye to eye with each other … I leaned closer and pressed my lips against hers, she put her arms around my neck, I put my hands on her waist … Our lips still on each other as we kissed more passionately, I pushed Hermione up against the door.

Before I knew it; we had found our way to my bedroom and fell onto the bed … Still kissing, I felt one of Hermione's hand going through my hair, I let one of my hands slip down her body and into a skirt, our kiss broke as she let a moan escape her mouth as she felt my hand rub the outside of her knickers.

It wasn't long before we had each other clothes off and I was on top of her … I continued to tease Hermione with my fingers before she moaned.

"Harry-y" She moaned.

I grinned as I pressed my lips against hers again; I lined myself up with her and thrust into her, I held it there as Hermione moaned more … I continued to go in and out of her, getting quicker and faster.

"Oh fuck Harry!" Hermione breathed out, as she dug her nails into my back.

I groaned as I went in and out of her. "My god Mione"

"I'm gonna come Harry" Hermione said, breathlessly.

I did a few more before one finally thrust which made us both groan loudly. I collapsed next to Hermione as we both tried catching our breath … Hermione cuddled into me, rested her head on my chest and I rested my arms around her, holding her close to me. We must have fallen asleep because I felt the sun come through the blind as I looked down to see Hermione still sleeping in my arms, I smiled as I watched her.

But my smile soon turned as I thought about Ron. Hermione started waking up; she sat up quite quickly, looking around the room and then at me.

"What happened?" Hermione asked.

I didn't know what to say but I got up and put some bottoms on. "I'll make coffee"

I left Hermione in the room; it was only a few minutes later … Hermione came out of the room in my shirt and into the kitchen and sat at the table, covering her face with her hands and just cried, I put the coffee in front of her and sat next to her.

"Oh Harry" She cried into her hands. "How could we be so…?"

"Hermione, it's fine" I said, taking her hands away from her face. "We don't have to tell anyone not even Ron, just pretend it didn't happen"

She nodded her head before letting more tears fall. "But what if I can't? Harry, I'm a married woman…" She continued to cry.

I got closer and pulled her in for a hug. "You can Hermione, you're going to go back to Ron and make things work with him" I responded.

Hermione pulled away from me and looked at me. "But Harry…"

"No buts Hermione, we can't do this to Ron" I said, looking away from her. "He's my best friend and your husband"

She sighed and just nodded. "Nothing left to say then"

I just sat there and didn't say another word before she got up and stormed off … I could hear her around in my bedroom, sorting herself out before coming out and facing me. She got closer to me and hugged me … I hugged her back, kissing her neck.

"I love you Hermione but…" I whispered.

Hermione kissed my lips … I continued to kiss her back, pushing her against the door but the kiss soon broke when the door knocked, we got away from each other and went to answer it.

"Ah Harry, your here" Kingsley spoke as he came in and saw Hermione standing there. "Hello Mrs Weasley"

Hermione smiled. "Kingsley, Harry I will see you at work" She said before leaving me.

I sighed as she left and turned to Kingsley.

I closed the door and cried, slipping down the door and hugging my knees to my chest; banging my head against the door … How stupid could I have been to do that to Ron? How am I supposed to carry on now knowing what I've done, what Harry has done to his best friend? I could ask these questions a thousand of times but still have no answer.

I sat here for half an hour before; I felt someone touch me and it was Ron … He gave me a half smile and helped me to my feet, he sat me down at the table and put a cup of tea in front of me and held my hands into his.

"Hermione, we need to talk" Ron spoke. "I need you, I can't do this alone anymore"

I turned my head slowly to look at him; letting all the tears down his face, pleading me to talk to him, pleading me to love him, touch him but I couldn't … I feel guilty about not supporting my husband through this grief and sleeping with his best friend but maybe I've done this for comfort, not wanting any comfort from my husband.

"I need to go to bed" I spoke softly.

Ron nodded.

"Come with me" I said as I stood up and took his hand.

We got to the bedroom and Ron wrapped his arms around me and started kissing my neck but I slightly pushed him to turn around. I started kissing his lips.

I lay in the bed with Ron lying next to me, he was sleeping … I got up and put my pj's on and left the bedroom where I saw an owl, I took the letter and opened it.

I tore the letter up and threw it in the bin; I didn't want Ron to find this letter and as it clearly state it was a mistake. The next few weeks … We were all at the Burrows, celebrating Ginny's birthday.

I wasn't in the celebration mood but I had to snap out of it; after that mistaken night with Harry … Ron and I did talk and we decided that we didn't want our marriage to end and that we would talk to each other more which was doing. I kept my distance from Harry, I didn't want another thing to happen like that although … Since that night, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.

The party was big as Ginny had lots of friends … Ron had offered me to dance with him but I shook my head, he rolled his eyes and went off somewhere else. I took a look around the room and saw Ginny laughing with Luna and Neville, I scanned the room to see George, Billy and Charlie talking to each other … George had never been the same since Fred was killed. I wonder if that will be the same for me and Ron, will we ever feel the same again? Or is this grief always going to be there.

As I looked around the room; I saw Molly and Dean's mother, chatting away … I then noticed Ron was dancing with Lavender, he was smiling and laughing with her. They looked really close but I shook my head and didn't fill my thoughts with terrible thinking that Ron was having an affair … Who would blame him though? I had slept with Harry. Unfortunately, Harry wasn't coming tonight because he had been sent on another mission and won't be back for another week … I hadn't been able to stop thinking about Harry at all which broke my heart as I feel me and him have ruined a perfectly good friendship but as he states in his letter that he will always love me and Ron. As I sighed, I felt a hand on my shoulder … I looked up to see Harry standing there.

"Harry!" I burst out, standing up quickly and giving him a big hug.

"Hey Hermione" He spoke, hugging me back.

We pulled apart, holding hands. "How are you? I thought you weren't coming back for another week" I said.

Harry chuckled. "Well just prove how good an Auror I am"

I laughed and hugged him again. "It's so good to see you"

"It's good to see you too Hermione and looking happier" Harry pointed out.

I sighed, folding my arms. "Ron and I need to get past this and we will" I responded.

Harry smiled at me and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "I need to go and say hello to Molly and Ginny, I'll catch up with you later" Harry said.

I nodded as I watched Harry walk away from me; I then paid my attention back to Ron who was dancing dangerously close to Lavender, I noticed he had his hand on her arse, there was no gap between them, Lavender had her arms around him … I let a tear escape my eye before looking away, I went and got myself another drink and turned to look at Ron again … His hands were going underneath her skirt, I turned to grab the bottle of firewhiskey and left the tent.

I found a quiet area away from the tent to breathe … Was Ron really about to cheat on me? In front of a load of people, it's terrible thinking that maybe it would be better to let Ron go but something is obviously making us hang onto this marriage. Maybe the thought of having another baby would help us but do I really want another baby? Do I really want to stay in this marriage? I took a long sip from the bottle of firewhiskey.

"Shouldn't drink it like that" Harry spoke as he came to sit with me.

I chuckled and passed him the bottle. "Better this way" I joked.

Harry took a sip from it. "What are you doing out here?"

"I couldn't take much more of Ron roaming his hands over Lavender" I answered.

Harry nodded and smiled weakly at me. "I had noticed"

"How was your mission?" I asked.

Harry nodded. "Yeah it was okay, not as bad as the last one"

I smiled as I looked at Harry. "I always worry that you won't come back"

Harry sat closer and cuddled me. "I'll always come back" Harry whispered.

It felt so right being in Harry's arms; we heard laughing from a distance and saw Ginny come out with Dean, kissing him and cuddling him … Dean was obviously whispering things to Ginny which was making her laugh.

"Shall we go back in?" Harry asked.

I nodded and we went back inside the tent to see people were disappearing; I saw Ron and Lavender still talking and laughing at each other, I turned to Harry and kissed his lips softly.

"Take me home Harry" I said against his lips.

Harry nodded. He took me back to his place and we continued our little party at his.

I ran to the toilet to throw up; I spent most mornings getting up and running to the toilet to be sick … I just put it down to guilt of not being a good wife and betraying our marriage, I'm actually surprised that we hadn't been caught yet but then Ron was never around to notice if I come home anymore, I thought we were supposed to be trying but I think we've given up on trying to make each other happy and just not saying anything to each other.

It was only last week; we were together at the Leaky Cauldron … I and Ron had gone out for Seamus's birthday celebration. Everyone was there … Seamus was quite a popular bloke even back at Hogwarts even when he had gone against Harry in the 5th year and didn't believe him but it was all in the past. Harry and Seamus actually work together in the Auror Department. When we did get here; Ron had gone off quite quickly, I just sat at the bar, ordering butterbeer with a slight ginger until I wanted something stronger.

Ginny had come over to talk to me and she would ask how me and Ron are getting on and I would answer that we're fine when really it is a lie. Harry had turned up and he would be keeping me company for the night, Harry wasn't good with parties or social events … He didn't mind coming to them but if he can he will avoid them. I ended up having a good time with Harry whilst I also watched Ron, whispering and flirting with another girl we went to school with.

In some way when I see this happening with Ron, it doesn't make me feel too bad about sleeping with Harry at all but what if it isn't sex with Ron? What if it's just flirting and teasing the girls? I had thought about asking Lavender who Ron had his hands all over at the last party but it doesn't seem to bother Ron who it is or if it will get back to me.

Harry and I would soon disappear from the Leaky Cauldron and apparating straight to Harry's flat, clothes already off and into his bed. I would spend the night there and not feel a slight guilt towards Ron for sleeping with Harry.

But here I sat by the toilet being sick; this has been happening for about 6 weeks now and Harry came and stood in the doorway of the bathroom, giving me a concerning look.

"Are you okay?" Harry asked.

I nodded and smiled weakly. "Yeah, I'll be fine"

As this affair continues so does my sicknesses and headaches; Harry plead me to go and see a healer and find out what was going on … I refused and said it was just a regular thing until I went to the Burrows with Ron one day and Molly had made comments.

"Hermione, dear you're looking a bit peaky" Molly spoke.

I sighed. "I'm fine"

"Have you been sleeping?" Molly asked.

I nodded. "Yes"

Ginny spoke. "How are things with Ron?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't know, I barely see him and when I do see him," I took a moment before speaking again. "He's distance"

"You spend a lot of time with Harry" Ginny said.

"Well, we work in the same building and we have lunch together when we can" I responded.

Ginny raised an eyebrow and nodded. "Just feel something more going on than you're letting on"

"No" I lied.

The conversation was soon changed when Ron came in the room with Harry and Arthur. Later on that day; I and Harry were outside, with beer bottles in our hands … We were laughing and talking about things but as I took another sip of my beer, I ran to the toilets to be sick again. Harry came running after me and held my hair back and rubbed circles on my back.

Harry sighed. "That's it, I'm taking you to see a healer tomorrow" Harry said, as I sat back against the wall and Harry sat next to me.

We looked at each other and leaned closer to Harry and kissed him on the lips. We soon broke it off when we heard someone in the doorway of the bathroom.

"Thanks a lot mate" Ron spoke.

"Ron" I gasped as I stood up with Harry.

"Ron, it isn't what it looks like" Harry began to say.

"Please tell me your not?" Ron raised the question to Harry.

I could see the nerve in Harry before he answered. "Absolutely not" He lied.

"I was just thanking Harry for everything he's done for us" I replied.

I dare look at Harry; I'm hoping that Ron will believe that I just kissed Harry to say thank you.

Ron nodded. "Harry, I would like to talk to my wife on her own"

Harry nodded and left without looking at me. I turned around to look in the mirror at myself and thought how messed up this was until I felt his arms around my waist and leaned his chin on my shoulder, cuddling me. I shut my eyes, trying not to let the tears fall.

"You know I love you" Ron began to say and I just nodded opening my eyes to look at him in the mirror. "Please don't leave me"

I shook my head. "I'm not" I whispered.

I didn't know if this was a lie or if it was the truth; maybe part of me thought that me and Ron could get through this and he would never find out about me and Harry sleeping together or is this me lying to myself knowing that our marriage has failed, not just because of our loss but the affair I found out Ron was having which no one knows about and because I hold secrets like them nights many years ago when war between the Dark Lord and Harry was going off, where Ron had left us for a few nights … Harry and I shared a night which was never spoken about.

"I'm sorry I hurt you" Ron muttered into my ear.

I let the tears fall down my face. "Who was it this time?" I asked, knowing why he was saying sorry and also knowing that I will find the truth out from her.

"You don't want to know" Ron answered, gripping his arms tighter around my waist.

I got out of Ron's grip and turned around to face him. "Let's go downstairs and eat dinner and then go home" I said.

Ron looked puzzled but just nodded. He leaned in to kiss me on the lips but I moved my head slightly so he caught my cheek. We went downstairs where we found Molly was dishing the food out … I made eye contact with Harry before taking my seat.

The next day; I went and stopped by Harry's office before going off to see the Healer but he wasn't there so I asked Seamus where he was, apparently out on a mission with one of the new Auror. I sighed to myself and just took myself to the Healer … When I did get there; she called me straight away and I sat on the chair, facing her.

"Hello Mrs Weasley, how can I help you?" She asked with a smile.

"I think I'm pregnant" I answered.

She nodded with a smile. "Right well let's get you tested and go from there"

I sighed quietly to myself and just nodded. It was only when all the tests were done and I sat back in the chair … She spoke. "You are pregnant"

"How many weeks?" I asked.

"I would say about 9 weeks" She revealed. "I know things have been difficult Mrs. Weasley since losing baby Jacob, I'm surprised I haven't seen you sooner"

I let the tears fall down my face. "I seem to cry every day, he's been gone 7 months"

"I know" The Healer said. "I thought I might have seen you before as Mr. Potter came by when he got back from his 3 months mission and said he felt you could do with talking to someone"

"I had Harry" I spoke, I smiled slightly.

The healer smiled. "Well it's big congratulations to you and Mr. Weasley"

Do I tell her? Do I tell her that this baby isn't Ron's? I know it wasn't because I haven't slept with Ron in ages … Do I tell her it's Harry's baby? Either way, it's going to come out unless I don't say anything about me and Harry but then how can I live a lie?

"I need to make a confession," I murmured.

She sat there quietly and waited for me to talk. "It isn't Ron's baby"

She looked at me with surprise and confusion. "Right"

I sighed in relief. "Been so stupid"

"Why is that? Why do you say that?" She asked.

"Harry was supposed to have come with me today as promised" I answered, tearfully looking down at my hands.

"Mr. Potter is sitting outside the room" She spoke. "I will see you in a few weeks to check the baby"

Harry was outside the room. I just nodded and got up to leave the room; when I got outside the room, I saw him and I smiled so brightly and hugged him.

"I'm so sorry, I hadn't forgotten just caught up with work" Harry began to explain, hugging me tight. "What happened?"

We pulled out of the hug. "I'm pregnant Harry"

Shit. That was all I could think; I didn't know what to say to her … I looked at her tiny swollen stomach and then back at her, I pulled her slowly in for a hug. I couldn't believe it, Hermione is carrying my baby.

We sat in the Leaky Cauldron in silence; I didn't really know what to say. I had thought about telling her to keep it a secret and pretend that it's Ron's baby but how would the baby look when it comes out … Or should I tell Hermione that we should come clean to Ron? I was supposed to help them stay together but no instead I did what I never thought would happen again.

Yes, all them nights ago when me and Hermione were left in the tent during the war; we shared a moment and it got heated between us but never in years to come that we would be back here, we had decided that we didn't need to tell Ginny or Ron about the night in the tent and we still don't need to tell them.

"What are we going to do?" Hermione asked.

She's going to hate me when I say this."I think we shouldn't tell Ron, you should tell him it's his baby" I answered.

I could see the tears in Hermione's eyes. "Harry…"

"We can't Hermione" I said, quietly. "It would destroy Ron if you left him"

Hermione shook her head. "Do you know how many times Ron has cheated on me Harry?" She asked.

I sent her a confusing expression. "What?"

Hermione looked out of the window. "Ron had a drinking problem, he would go out and sleep with any girl that would make a fuss of him, that was during my pregnancy and then when Jacob was born, I thought it was over the whole drinking thing and sleeping with other girls but I was so wrong because when I let him go out that evening, Ron didn't return home" Hermione cried softly.

This made my blood boil. "I'm gonna kill him," I hissed.

Hermione shook her head. "No please don't, no one knows and I want to keep it this way" Hermione spoke, holding my hands.

I sighed, rubbing the back of my head before looking back at Hermione and pulled her in for a hug. I couldn't believe it, I didn't want to believe things had got this bad with Ron and Hermione … I could see people looking at us and whispering, that made me angry that people can't keep their noses out of people's business.

"Come on let's get out of here" I said, standing up and taking Hermione's hand.

I took Hermione back to my office as I was still due at work. We couldn't leave things this way, we needed to talk about this.

"What are we going to do?" I asked.

Hermione shook her head. "My marriage is over Harry, I'm carrying someone else's baby" Hermione answered.

I nodded. "Maybe come away for a bit Hermione, I'm off to see Teddy for a few weeks" I began to say before she looked at me. "Andromeda needs help"

Hermione nodded. "Maybe that will do me some good"

I smiled and gave Hermione a kiss on the lips. The following day; I had come to the Burrows with Hermione where Ron was helping Arthur and George with a few things.

"Oh Hermione dear" Molly said, hugging her and then me. "And you Harry"

"I need to talk to Ron" Hermione replied.

I could see the look on Ginny and Dean's faces that this wasn't a good thing, Molly looked at us all.

"Hermione, I think you really need to think about this" Molly responded, Hermione said nothing but let her eyes water up. "Harry, please talk to her"

I sighed and shook my head. "I can't"

"Is he here?" Hermione snapped.

This made us all silent before Arthur came into the room with Ron, George and Billy. They were all laughing, obviously someone said a joke … But the laughing soon stopped when they noticed us all in the room, Hermione again just letting the tears dry, Ginny trying to fight the tears, Molly looking like a white ghost before she turned to the boys.

"Who died?" George asked.

Molly sighed. "Right let's leave Hermione and Ron to talk"

We all went into the living room and left them to talk; I looked at Hermione before leaving and she nodded.

I could tell Harry didn't want to leave the room and in some way I wished he hadn't … I could have done it with him in the room but maybe it is better for husband and wife to talk alone. I have to tell Ron the truth about how I have been feeling and about our marriage being over. It was hard to start these conversations up but it's got to be done.

We sat at the table with 2 cup of tea on the table and the awkward silence between us. My heart was breaking and I was in emotional pain.

"This isn't going to be easy Ron but I think I need to…" I breathed as I tried to catch my breath, trying to find the right words. "I need to be honest with you now"

I could tell by Ron's face that he knew what was coming or expecting to come from me, as I looked at my rings on my finger before speaking again.

"This marriage isn't working anymore Ron" I spoke. "I have a confession to make but since Jacob died, since your drinking habit and sleeping with other women, I just don't feel we can get through this"

"Please Hermione" Ron begged, taking my hand in his. "Please don't leave me now"

"I have to Ron, I'm alone and I can't stop crying" I said, snatching my hand away and standing up.

Ron stood up and walked over to me and hugged me, trying to kiss me but I shook my head, pushing him away.

"No!" I nearly yelled. "It's over Ron"

"Then tell me how to make it right, Hermione?" Ron asked. "What can I do? Because you don't seems to be making things easy for me to make things right"

I shook my head. "There is nothing Ron"

I could see the anger in Ron's face, he was disappointed and not understanding what this is all about really, I have yet to tell him that I've been sleeping with Harry and having his baby.

"It's him isn't it?" Ron asked, looking out of the window.

I looked at Harry who was talking to Billy and George and I sighed. "Who?"

"Harry" Ron spoke. "I'm not blind Hermione"

"At least he knows how to teach a woman right" I pointed out, turning to look at Ron.

Ron scoffed. "Right yeah I'm sure he does" Ron said. "He messed Ginny around in the 6th year and the 7th year and then still continued to mess her around"

I laughed and shook my head. "No he didn't Ron, no one really knows what was going on with Harry and Ginny, not even me" I argued.

There was a silence between us for a short while before he spoke again. "Are you seeing Harry?"

I looked down at my tiny bump before looking back up at him and nodded. "I'm pregnant"

"Wow" Ron breathed. "You know what our of all them girls I did sleep with, not one of them got pregnant because I wasn't stupid enough to forget the protection"

"You still slept with them didn't you?" I asked, coldly. "There's nothing here anymore Ron"

I took my rings off and put them on the table. Ron said nothing apart from letting the tears escape his tired eyes.

"I'll be moving out and moving in with Harry until I sort myself out" I informed Ron.

Ron scoffed. "More like you'll stay with Harry and build a family with him well I hope he realises that the friendship is truly over and you can do one too" Ron spoke, harshly.

I just nodded and left the house, not saying another word and came face to face with everyone.

Molly spoke. "I'm so sorry it's come to this Hermione"

I shook my head and let the tears fall. "I'm not, you ought to be ashamed of Ronald" I burst out, Molly gave me a confusing look, a questioning look.

"Okay I think that's enough said" Ginny warned.

"No, you all need to know that this isn't my fault!" I nearly yelled. "Ron cheated on me with a numerous of women while I was pregnant, he would disappear for nights, he didn't even come home the night Jacob had died, he didn't love me enough to stop"

"And what about you?" Ginny questioned me. "You're not perfect, I know I'm not stupid"

"At least he's know how to treat a woman right" I spoke to Ginny.

Ginny laughed and shook her head. "He will get bored of you, he will be sleeping with the next Auror girl" Ginny said.

I was shocked. Did Harry cheat on Ginny? No he can't have, he would have told me about unless it was something to be kept a secret.

"Didn't tell you did he?" Ginny asked, looking at Harry.

"I think that's enough, I'm going in" Bill spoke. "To see if Ron okay"

Ginny was going to talk again but Molly spoke. "I think it's time we all took a breather and calm down"

With that; Molly, Arthur and George went indoors leaving me, Ginny, Dean and Harry outside but I could tell Ginny was ready to give it another go. Am I just about to discover why Harry and Ginny broke up? Was it really anything to do with me? Can he be trusted?

"Are you going to feed me a load of lies Ginny?" I asked.

Ginny laughed, looking at Harry. "Are you going to tell her?"

I looked at Harry who had a guilty look on his face; I knew Harry too well and when the split did happen between the two, I didn't press Harry for the truth back then but maybe it will be time now. Give him a chance to tell the truth.

"Ginny, just go inside," I said. "Please?"

Dean pulled Ginny inside and I looked at Harry … I got closer to him. "Let's go" I whispered.

We got away from the Burrows and we went back to Harry's flat … It was tidy just the way we had left it this morning, Harry went off to make some tea and I made myself comfortable on the sofa. I saw a photo on the fireplace of him and Ginny … I stood up and had a closer look at the photo. Harry was holding her and she was laughing … I smiled weakly at the photo, just imagining that to be me and Harry.

I had a horrible feeling in my stomach that Harry was going to confirm what Ginny had said about him sleeping with someone in the Auror was true but that was just my gut. If Harry does confirm it, will I ever be able to trust him? Harry came in the tea and I turned to look at him with a smile, trying not to let the tears fall … Is Harry about to break my heart?

I sat down on the sofa and Harry sat next to me.

"Harry…" I began to say. "I just want the truth"

Harry nodded. "It wasn't supposed to happen but it did and I will always carry the regret to what I did to Ginny" Harry responded.

"What … What happened?" I asked.

"I was sent on a mission for 2 months, obviously I said no because Ginny was pregnant and I didn't want to leave her alone but I had no choice being the most trained up Auror to handle this mission so I took it, Ginny and I argued about it" Harry answered. "When I was due to leave, Ginny said there was no point in returning as she would be gone so we left the relationship on a rock, I knew she didn't mean it … I knew she was just scared that I might not come back alive which is the same with most missions but anyway weeks went on and I got an owl from Molly that Ginny was at St Mungo's and that she had miscarried the baby at 14 weeks … There was nothing I could do, I couldn't come back and be with Ginny but when I got an owl from Ginny, she told me it was over and that there was nothing to come back to … But when I did come back, Ginny had packed all her stuff and left before I could say anything so me being a stupid idiot, went out and got drunk on firewhiskey and ended up sleeping with one of the girls that was on the mission with us"

I just sat so silently; not knowing what to really say … I do remember Ginny moving her things out but I always thought Ginny would go back because she did this all the time when Harry went on missions, she knew what his job role was so she knew what she was taking on but she just wasn't happy about it.

I sighed. "How did Ginny find out about you and the girl?"

"Ginny had come back the next morning and found us in the bed" Harry answered.

"What happened to her?" I questioned Harry about the girl.

"She still works for Auror" Harry responded.

I nodded not really knowing what to say anymore; I have all these questions in my head … But being with Harry nearly everyday, talking to him but how do I know he still doesn't look at the girl? How can I be sure that Harry isn't going to do the same thing when things get tough between us? It was a really difficult relationship for Ginny and Harry.

They hadn't had an easy start. They wanted to be together during our 6th year but Harry couldn't put Ginny at risk, during the 7th year Harry and Ginny remained close but when it was all over with Voldermort, Harry still remained unsure to whether he wanted to be with Ginny but they eventually did get together but then Harry being an Auror changed a lot of things as Ginny wasn't happy Harry being at risk.

I still feel like that but it's what Harry wants to do with his life and I respect him for that. I stood up and looked out of the window … I then spoke again.

"How come you never told me about this?" I asked, turning to look at Harry.

Harry sighed. "It wasn't anyone else business just mine and Ginny just like you and Ron, you didn't tell me about Ron"

I watch Harry stand up and walk over to me … He took my hands into his and pulled me closer, letting our lips touch … I didn't push him away, I continued to kiss him before I knew it we were in his bedroom, stripping our clothes off and into his bed.

"Can I trust you Harry?" I asked.

There was a long silence before I looked up at Harry and he nodded. "Yes"

I sat up properly to look at him. "I can't go through all this again, what Ron did to me, I can't have them thoughts of worrying where you are all the time when you go out with the guys or if we have a fight I can't be worrying that you are with someone else" I said.

Harry pulled me in for a hug and spoke. "I would never hurt you"

After that night; I told Harry that our past relationships need to be forgotten and not to let it ruin us. I soon began the divorced process with Ron after a month of telling him that it was over. I told Ron that I didn't want anything from the house or any money from him, I just wanted a quiet divorce and we both agreed. I let Ron keep the house and moved into Harry's flat.

Harry and I remained close to the Weasley's family even when the divorced became final. Well I say close, we only go for dinners on Sundays and I go round to see Molly and Arthur when Harry is working late in the office or his missions. Ron never stuck to his word, he met someone else and still continued to be good friends with Harry. Ginny and I weren't close anymore, she couldn't get over what me and Harry had done to Ron and she said to me once mine and Ron divorce was finalised that she hopes Harry does the same to me as what he did to her. We never had any problems with Bill, Fluer, George or his wife, Angelina.

Harry is now a fully trained Auror which I threw a big congratulations party which led me to meeting this girl that Harry had a one-night-stand with … She was very pretty and I can see why Harry did, I can't lie and pretend that I don't feel insecure about it as her and Harry work together quite a bit on missions together but I had to push my fears away … I remember popping into see Harry on lunch breaks and I would hear the girl sitting at her desk, crying and moaning over the latest boyfriend to all the Auror department, Harry has warned her to leave her personal life at the door before coming into work. From what I hear from Seamus and Dean, that Harry has threatened to sack her because of trouble that she brings but then what I hear also from Harry is that she's brilliant at her job just emotional train wreck.

I scream as I crush Harry's hand.

"NEARLY THERE" The healer shouted, happily.

"I CAN'T BLOODY PUSH ANYMORE" I screamed.

"Yes you can" The healer spoke.

"Come on Hermione, you've got this" Harry encouraged.

"I HATE YOU" I shouted at him.

Harry chuckled. "Of course you do"

"Right, one more big push and then baby will be here" Healer said.

I cried and shook my head. "No, I can't, Harry please don't make me push anymore"

Harry kissed me on the lips. "One more and then he will be here"

I did one big final push and then heard a baby crying … I looked at Harry who was smiling and hugging me.

"He's here" Harry whispered.

It was a boy and his name was James Albus Potter.

"Come on James!" I called from the bottom of the stairs.

Harry came running down the stairs.

"Is he still not ready?" Harry asked.

I shook my head. "Nope, I told him not to leave things to the last minute" I answered. "Are you working today?"

Harry nodded. "Yeah but I'm not going in until I've seen James off to Hogwarts"

I smiled. "Can't believe he's going"

Harry smiled, putting his arms around me and kissing me. "He's going to be fine"

"I know," I said. "Anyway got this little one to think about"

Harry looked at the baby boy I was holding, he was only 8 weeks old. We had the perfect little family.