A/N: This is Aman's Story.
Warning: Auto corrects and typos are always behind my back so please forgive me for any mistakes. And please don't get mad at my attempt at typing Hindi, it is NOT my First or Second language so I am prone to make mistakes.
One can say that Aman was kind of the person who was pampered a lot, judging from the way his family was always doting on him. And they could say that Aman was lucky to have this kind of a family who loves him a lot. But he would beg to differ.
For Aman, all this pampering and doting was always suffocating. Not that he doesn't like it at all, more like, the over affection always sets him on the edge and always seemed like his own family was constraining him in a small cage.
His only breath of relief was in the form of Goggle. He always used to follow her everywhere, getting into trouble with her and that small space of freedom was all that he ever wanted, and was available in plenty around Goggle.
Then the accident happened. And he was still dependent on Goggle, willing to show her that whatever happens, he will always be by her side and never will judge her as a weak person. He learnt to adjust with the disability, he guided her, observed her and supported her only when she needed it as he knew what it was like to be smothered, having no freedom to do what you want.
He was the one that stood up for her whenever people made fun of her, ignoring the people who make fun of him for doing so. He vowed to stay beside her until the day she doesn't need him. He noticed all the details that no one ever noticed about her and he knew that they were each other's anchors to the real world.
Then came their teenage years. He had discovered that he was attracted to boys and it scared the shit out of him. He knew that his family won't accept it, Goggle might, considering the way she eyes girls, but didn't have the hope that his family might accept him for who he is, so he started distancing himself from them. It was not so obvious but it was there.
He started a pattern for dating, always going out in 3s, always go out with a girl and a boy to avoid suspicion. Often he was beat up for being gay but he controlled his temper and took it all in silently. Goggle used to patch him up but never questioned him about what happened and he was happy for that.
Then came the time when Goggle got her boyfriend. She was completely over the moon, the happiness radiated out of her and he was really very happy for her for finding herself a boyfriend. But all good things come to an end and there was a small mishap and that ended with Goggle being forced to break up with him.
And Goggle was distraught. She started avoiding nearly everyone, stopped talking and started losing weight and then the family grew concerned and asked Aman to talk to her about it, almost like they couldn't talk to her about anything. That was another thing he hated about the family. They always sent him to talk to Goggle and never took the initiative to talk to her. It wasn't like they didn't love her, he could see the pity and helplessness that he knew Goggle wouldn't like whenever something happens. So he complies.
He holds her while she cries, he supports her when she needs, he stays with her when no one does and the bond grows strong. College happens, job searching starts and all he wants is to finally give in to his wanting and get far away from the smothering love of his family, to be set free.
And that's what he does. He says that he has got a job in Delhi and he leaves everyone behind, wanting to taste the sense of freedom. He rarely contacted them unless they contacted him. The only person he would voluntarily contact was Goggle and even that slowly started to decrease when he met him.
Kartik... Aman couldn't explain what he felt whenever he sees that man. He looked just like an over energetic grown up boy who was constantly on the move, shamelessly flirting with anyone and everyone he could find and his boldness. It was both annoying and endearing.
He could still remember the first time they met. Aman was new to Delhi and was searching for a job and a place and he was currently sitting at a park bench, not knowing where to go when he approached him.
"Mere saath love ride par jaaoge? Usne mujhe yeh dare diya hai" he said, pointing to a girl, later he came to know as Devika, and looked at him in reply. "Please haan kehdo varna mujhe usko Rs. 100 dena padega" he said with his puppy dog eyes. (Will you go with me on the love ride? She gave me a dare) (Please tell yes or I will have to give her Rs. 100)
Aman just stared at him before saying yes, it wasn't like he was doing anything productive anyways. "Ek shart par. Tumhe mujhe rahne ke liye ek jagah suggest karni padegi. Main yahaan naya aaya hoon toh..." he said, a little unsure about himself. (On one condition. You have to suggest me some place where I can stay. I'm new here...)
"Theek hai, manzoor, ab chalo" he said like an excited puppy as he dragged Aman along to the love ride. After that short ride, he introduced himself and Devika before offering to share his place with him, stating that maybe they would be able to afford the place together, hell, he'd even got him a job at the same place. (Ok, I agree, now come)
And slowly they got to know each other, became partners, best friends and Aman had to try very hard to suppress his blush around Kartik and that was when he realised that he was in love with the man in front of him but was afraid to speak it out to him.
But he didn't have to worry much about it as one day, Kartik suddenly asked "Tumhe ladke pasandh ya ladkiyaan?" startling Aman. "Ab kyoon is baath pooch rahe ho? Mujhe dekkar kya sochte ho?" Aman asked. "Tum itna sexy ho ki main tumhe khaana chahta hoon." Kartik blurted out. "Achcha, toh tumhe ladke pasandh hai?" Aman asked in surprise and hope. (Do you like boys or girls?) (Why are you asking this now? What do you think of me?) (You are so sexy that I want to eat you) (Oh, so you like boys?)
"Haan, maine batha toh tha?" Kartik asked, slightly confused. "Oh... Shaayad main us samay distracted tha, tumhari soch mein" Aman said. "Jawab do na?" Kartik whined. "Mere saath ek date par chal, phir dekhte hain" Aman said, praying that he caught the correct signal. (Yeah, I had told you before) (Oh... maybe I was distracted at that time, thinking about you) (Give me an answer) (Go on a date with me, then we'll see)
Kartik just blinked and them gave him such a bright smile that it just lightened Aman's heart to see that he was able to make Kartik that happy. Soon, they shifted into the same room and his introduction to the other side of Kartik happened. The depressed, insecure guy who was hurt many times over and constantly lives in fear. Aman learned his small quirks that showed what he needed and gave him what he needed, the affection, the love and the support that he needed.
After learning about this insecure side of his love, he couldn't even think about going back to his family during holidays, he just didn't have the heart to leave this beautiful man behind, battling the world all alone and so, he decided to stay back and keep it a secret. It's not like the family was going to welcome them with open arms if he ever introduced Kartik to them. He didn't want to cause Kartik any more hurt than he already has.
He could still hear Devika's words from the time she was giving him the talk. "Kartik ko bohot chote padi hai zindagi mein. Yahi hai pahli baar after a long time I'm seeing him this happy. Agar tune kabhi soch bhi kiya usko hurt karne ki, mujhe nahi patha ki main tumhara saath kya karoongi" she had said. (Kartik has been hurt many times over the years. This is the first time in a long time I'm seeing him this happy. If you even think of hurting him, I don't know what I'll do with you)
And even he could never think of hurting him. This was the first time he has ever felt whole, complete and he was happy that someone could understand him other than Goggle, someone was willing to be there for him and he couldn't lose this at any cost, for both of their sakes.
But fate, it seems, was not on their side as circumstances forced him to go back home, tagging Kartik along with him and now, their whole world is dangling on a thin line that can snap at any moment.
A/N: And, that is the sevent installment of the series. Hope you all like it. All comments and criticism accepted and appreciated! This fic is betaed by girl. with. passion! Any prompts are welcome. Kartik is up next!
Thank you all for reading!
Rasi10 signing off
Published on 2 March 2020