CHAPITRE 5 - The moment of truth

Unconsciousness was like a blanket wrapped around her to protect her from the outside world. After a difficult journey to her room and more tears, exhaustion had finally won. Not a single dream had troubled her as it seemed that the reality was already enough nightmarish.

But she couldn't escape indefinitely. Even the queen was accountable. Especially the queen.

A few knocks on the door remained unanswered. Anna's sleep had barely been disturbed. Moment later, the hinges creaked a little under the push of the housekeeper who noted to have them oiled. She made her way through the dark room, instinct pushing her towards the curtains. A hand clasped on the thick fabric, she decided otherwise. The child she cared for wasn't just difficult about waking up today. Quietly, she approached the bed and pulled the covers to reveal a mess of red hair.

"Your Majesty. Morning is here."

No reaction. She reiterated, accompanying the words with a slight shake of the royal shoulder. Peaceful breathing quickened, Anna's eyes suddenly opening in the middle of her mop. She pushed her hair back with great difficulty, her eyelids fluttering furiously as she tried to identify the person leaning over her.

"Gerda ? What-" She cleared her throat. "What are you doing here ? Where is Astrid ?"

"She had a bad cough, your Majesty. I preferred to give her a task where she would not pass it to anyone. I hope my presence will satisfy you in the meantime."

Odd, Anna couldn't help but think. Gerda hadn't taken care of her daily life since...years. Since Elsa had isolated herself in her room. That thought did not fail to remind her of the previous night. So, not a dream. She grimaced as she passed her hand over her tear-red eyes. Then again when the curtains were opened and a whitish light went through the windows.

"It's still snowing."
"What ?"

It was enough to pull her out of the ditch that her miserable condition made her dig. She made an effort to straighten up, shivering as soon as the blankets fell around her. Outside, silent snowflakes were falling.

"It's a little early for that. The harvest fest had barely passed."

She shouldn't have been surprised. The kingdom suffered a strange climate for years. Fall snow was nothing by comparison to that summer, a lifetime ago. During an afternoon, Anna had been happy to bring out the coats and scarves to play outside. She always loved snow and saw this event as a gift for her birthday. Hours earlier, she was upset that her sister was not joining her on her special day. She had been hoping for months, this request being the only answer she gave when asked what gift she wanted. But she only had toys and books to welcome her after breakfast and the absence had never been so heavy. Then the snow had started to fall.

But today was different. No fluffy flakes, perfect for building a snowman. The snow became water again as soon as it touched the window, turning into sad streaks. Almost like tears.

"Kai cleared your schedule for the morning."

Anna was forced to turn her attention to Gerda, noting how her gaze stayed too long on the bags under her eyes. She lifted her chin with all the dignity left in her.

"It will not be necessary."

"It's already late." Seeing the questions in the queen's eyes, she continued. "You just have the time to eat and refresh yourself before your afternoon meetings."

It was not what she wanted to know. A scathing remark tried to make its way out of her mouth but she bit down the words at the last moment. Her pride was a little bruised but her attendants were right. She barely felt able to get up now, so earlier... The rest had been a necessity.

"I will ask that your meal be served here."

Before leaving the room, Gerda smiled at her. A stretch of lips full of melancholy, yet encouraging.

Someting woke up inside Anna.

Gerda knew.

"Gerda."

Patiently she waited until the old housekeeper finished opening the curtains and turned to her.

"We both know that Astrid isn't sick."

For three days, the same routine had occurred. Gerda woke her up a little too long after dawn, had her meal brought to her room, and helped her prepare for the day. She didn't need to see Astrid to know she was in top shape. Something was going on and she was tired of it.

Gerda took a few steps towards the bed, clearly uncomfortable. Her gaze was fleeing and she was wringing her hands. A gesture that Anna had never seen her do, even before the wrath of the former king.

Anna felt a touch of guilt who was quickly swallowed up by her need to know. She had already been too patient.

"I just want to know why, are you doing here ?"

In her voice, she heard the plea of a little girl who never got an answer. Maybe that's what decided the servant. She sighed, her shoulders bending under a weight that the queen could not have guessed present.

"Princess Elsa asked me to watch over you for a few days."

A stupid idea crossed her mind. That still today her sister's voice had more strenght on the subjects of the kingdom than her own. But it was a petty thought. One fueled by her insecurities about her right to rule. In addition, Gerda had said that Elsa had asked and not ordered. A detail that was important.

"Like she cares about me."

She grunted like a surly teenager.

"You are mistaken, your Majesty. Princess Elsa always cared about you. Not a day gone by without her asking me about you."

"It's not enough !"

Anna cried out to stop the fiery housekeeper.

"It's not enough."

She says more calmly, fingers clenching in the blanket.

At one time she would have been so happy to hear that. But not today. Not after this reunion a few nights earlier. Elsa couldn't play with her heart like that.

She jumped when Gerda's hand landed on her shoulder. Warm and reassuring. Tears in her eyes, Anna looked up, meeting her gaze. Despite all these efforts to barricade herself, part of her wanted more.

"Please. I just want to understand. I'm sick of all these secrets."

Gerda sighed again. Slowly, awaiting the reprimand that never came, she landed on the edge of the bed.

"I can only tell you what I experienced."

Anna nodded furiously, her expectations low.

"Years ago, your mother made me promise something. I can still see her. She was petrified with fear but fierce like a lioness protecting her cub. She squeezed my hands so tight. Gerda, she said. Promise me to never leave Elsa alone. She must never be alone with the king. The same day, things started to change."

Anna suspected what day it was. Her world had exploded. The selfishness of the child she was never made her wonder if Elsa's world too broke down. It seemed obvious that it had been the case.

"When your parents die... Well... The courier announcing the sad news was barely gone and the king was already giving orders. Even you didn't know it yet. He ordered that the princess be moved. Said that she was no longer part of the royal family. He told the staff not to interact with her anymore, to behave as if she didn't exist. Some people have been against his will. Few. The princess was already so effaced."

"He what ?!"

She had tried to contain herself. Anna hadn't wanted to interrupt Gerda for fear of never knowing more. But she was too furious. Flabbergasted too. It was a lot at once. All of her beliefs flew away. She always knew her grandfather could be a cruel man but she thought he had some limits. What monster was going after his own family like that ? And all this for what ?

He hadn't given Elsa a choice.

Anna had managed to endure everything. Elsa's silence, her absence, her secrets. Despite the hurt and the anger, she kept trying to reach out for her sister. But the death of their parents had shattered her. She had cried for a long time in front of Elsa's room, begging her to open it, to talk to her at least, but the door remained closed and her sister silent.

Because Elsa was not there.

It didn't erase everything. Elsa still pushed her away. But at least Anna had a track to follow. She was no longer lost in the unknown.

She knew what she had to do.

"Where is she ? I saw her the other day, it means she still lives here."

"In the east wing. But what are you going to do, your Majesty ?"

Anna pondered for a moment. Things had to change. Even if Elsa refused to see her, she refused to leave her the choice on certain points. She was the princess of Arendelle, next on the line of succession, member of the royal family. She would uphold this truth.

King Runheard could go to hell, it was his place.

"Give my own orders."