Regina Mills was no stranger to pain.

In fact, it had become such a factor in her life that it'd become somewhat comforting. Because without a fail, it's always there.

As a child, Mother would never physically lay a hand on her, but that didn't apply to her magic. Though the bruising would never surface, her figure was all but molded into the wall of her chambers by the amount of times she'd be chained out and left to starve because she disobeyed her mother's order. She had been slapped, burned, whipped and tortured by her so called husband when she was barely a woman. Had lost two precious babies all because 'my throne belongs to Snow, and I won't have you tainting it with whatever child you may bear" he's tell her. Not to mention the royals she would be forced to bed in order to sway their voices, lands, or monies into deals.

Then it was Rumple and his sick and twisted ways of his teachings. Throwing her into the air and expecting her to ground herself mid panic, knives thrown at her direction just to she can attempt to bring up a protection barrier when she barely knew how to lite a fireball. Of course he would heal her, but never fully. He'd only remove the cuts and bruises, but left the rest as a reminder to work better, and to be a smarted student.

Then it was at the hands of Greg, and his electrifying vengeance against her. She'd never felt her body burn like that before.

But greatest pain she felt, was the day she lost her son. The day he neglected her as a mother. He was away from her, and without a single memory of their time together.

She's spent more nights crying herself to sleep than she truly cared to admit.

Physical or mentally Regina Mills was used to pain.

She could hear Robins panicked pleas, she could faintly make out Roland's hysterical cries calling out for her and his Papa but she was too far gone in her haze to register his words. She tried to move, but her body betrayed her, she felt his hands cradle her face, as she kept moving it from side to side.

"Regina, I need you to listen to me okay? I know it hurts but I need you to breath. Slowly." He begged her. Ever so slowly she managed to crack open her eyes, as she tried to concentrate on his voice.

"That's it love, just look at me and breath, I need you to calm down a bit so we can have someone look you over okay. Just breathe." He whispered as he did everything in his power to try and sooth her, his hands running through her hair, hands caressing her face, anything to try and get her to calm down her breathing. He could hear her struggle for breath, knew her ribs had still not healed. His own past experience he knew that in a panicked state it would only hurt more.

He managed to get Roland to snap out of his own haze, and asked him to find. So putting on a brave face, his son stood tall and ran towards the door in search of Granny.

Seeing her dry lips, he reached over for the glass of water that was placed near the bed, and lifted her head. She opened her eyes slowly, managing to breath out his name in a pained whisper.

"Shh, its ok Regina, I've got you. Drink some water."

Once she managed to drink half the glass, with eyes half lidded she asked him what had happened.

"I don't know. One second we were all outside watching the sky light up with colors, we assumed you had something to do with it. Then it all stopped, Roland cried your name, and there you were. God Regina I was so scared. I thought you were dead." He declared as it finally hit him. He could help the tears that fell from his eyes, as he lowered his forehead to hers. "I thought I'd lost you Regina." he said as he kissed her brow.

"It's ok, I'm here." She managed to breathe out. Though she felt her lungs, throat, and ribs protest against it.

All thoughts were lost to them both when they heard the door burst open, and Granny was at her side in an instant as Roland was held in the arms of Little John, and Will behind him.

"It's about time you woke up child." Granny said as she ran her fingers through Regina's hair.

Although she had managed to regulate her breathing, it was becoming a chore just to inhale. Her body felt like it was about to give up, at every touch or movement it felt like she was being burned from the inside out.

"I feel like I've been run through blender Nana." Regina whispered to her as she leaned into Granny's hands. Her pain getting the better of herself, her body and mind begging her to relinquish and just close her eyes all together. But she couldn't slip into that, she needed to stay awake.

"That's because you were. You're all bruised up, broken more bones than I can count on my hands, and all because you're too damn stubborn to accept our help!"

"I had to keep everyone safe." she half moaned as her brain was slowly registering every one of her injuries.

"And you've been out cold for 10 days now Regina. What were you thinking! Do you have a death wish? Is this what it's all about?"

"Just make the pain go away..." Regina begged. She felt like her body was on fire, her head was spinning, and she could see the black spots begin to form in her vision. And oh how she wanted to give in to it.

"Hush my sweet girl, it'll go away soon." Granny whispered, just before she turned to Doc and asked him to get them herbs they had gathers the day before and to brew it up before he brought it to the room.

They spent the rest of the night watching over her. Eventually she had succumbed to her sleep once more, but Robin and Granny had never been more grateful than to see her breathing. They stilled her when she stirred too much for fear she injure herself even more. Half her body was covered in tight binding in order to help set her bones, they knew she was in no way comfortable but they did their best to keep her soothed. The Herbs that Granny made her drink was able to alleviate some of her pain, but 10 days wasn't enough time to heal all of her wounds.

/

Granny had left the room in early hours, and Robin eventually fell asleep on the chair while holding her hand, so he didn't get a chance to see the moment Roland snuck into the room. The little boy had been kept away since her awakening, so here he was climbing up to her bed to protect her. He was after all her Little Knight. Once he was settled up on the bed, he slowly made his way to her side and slipped under the covers next to her. She had fallen hair covering her face, so as best as he could he took his little hands and moved them away from her pretty face.

"Gina you gots to wake up again. I haven't seen your pretty eyes in so long." he whispered as he shaped her face with his fingers.

"Little John said you opened them today, but they took me away. He said I had to wait 'til you were better but I just can't wait that long." He was so concentrated on the ministrations that his fingers were doing on her face, and on the story he began to tell her that he missed the occasional curved lips forming on her face.

She began to rouse from her slumber when she felt hands caressing her faces, and when she realized it was Roland speaking to her, she couldn't help but just linger with her eyes closed, listening the tales of his day.

Slowly, she opened her eyes, and noticed he was inches from her face, while his hand was running through her hair.

"My Little Knight" She whispered to him, as his eyes finally locked in with hers. His tiny mouth dropped open, as his eyes grew wide. She couldn't help but smile at his reaction.

"Gina you're awake." he breathed out as tears began forming in those beautiful brown eyes.

"I am." She said, she tried to lift her hand to wipe his tears, but was stopped immediately as a sharp shooting pain ran through her arm the moment she attempted to do so. She tried to suppress the groan of discomfort, but it came on so suddenly that it escaped her lips, causing a certain outlaw to wake.

"Roland what are you doing on the bed, I told you to stay out son!" He said as he rushed to get the boy out of the bed.

"No! Don't!" Regina tried to scream.

"Regina you're hurt, he knows better than to be here."

"But Papa, I just missed Gina." The little boy cried as he tried to fight his father's grip.

"Robin, please just leave him here with me. Please." She pleaded with him.

"I don't want him to hurt you love."

"He's not going to do. Please, just lay him back down okay?" She whispered.

"Okay, but Roland you must be careful. She's in a lot of pain ok son?"

"Yes, Papa." The little boy was all too eager to get back in bed with his Gina. He settled himself under the covers again, not quite right against Regina, but leaving the tiniest of spaces between them as he played with her hair.

"I'm happy you're awake now Gina." The boy said as he leaned over to kiss her cheek

She smiled happily as she beckoned Robin to sit down in the space next to her.

"Can you go and get Granny, I need more of the herbs she brought yesterday."

"I'll be right back." He said as he leaned down to press their foreheads together.

"I'm sorry I hurt you." Roland apologized.

"You could never hurt me. You're my Little Knight."

/

The following days of her awakening were troubling ones. Day by day she slowly got her energy back, her bandages were changed to see the progress of her healing bones. Her bruising was getting better, the dark blues and purples making way for the yellows and greens in some areas. Her ribs though we're still an alarmingly shade of purples and reds.

And that was just the physical healing process, for the Regina Mills was quite possibly the worst patient to have ever lived.

She was restless, short, and her attitude was limitless. Snow had tried and failed to speak with her, Granny just scolded her while she cared for her injuries and brought her lunch.

So it was a week later when Regina had enough of the situation. Granny was out with the Men gathering food, Robin had left to settle Roland down for his nap. She felt better today than she had since she came to the world of the living, so today for the first time she would summon her magic, and heal what her body had been slow to do.

Sitting up on the bed was harder than she expected, but like hell if she wasn't determined to at least sit up without anyone's help. She was tired of being coddled. Groaning as she sat, she finally managed to rest her back against the headboard, close her eyes, and rest her head against the board.

She felt like she had just ran a dam marathon and she hadn't even used her magic yet. So she

took a couple of minutes to just get her bearings together, and her breath, she just sat there. Thankfully, aside from a nasty gash on her leg, and some bruising, her sister managed to keep the broken bones to the upper half of her body. So as taxing as sitting up was, Regina needed to get out of that bed, and get into a bath tub. She felt filthy, even though she had been sponged bathed, she needed to feel actual water on her skin.

Knowing the physical battle that was to come, she took a deep breath and swung her legs to the edge of the bed. She proceeded to move her hands to the bedside table, and lifted herself up on her legs. The feeling was unusual after spending such a long time in bed, her entire body was stiff. For a second there she almost lost her balance due to the spinning going on in her head, but she righted herself before anything happened. Finally standing straight, she realized the flaw of her plan.

There was no bathing room in these quarters. "Naturally." She muttered under her breath. By the looks of it she was in one of the olds servants room, meaning her own room was a floor above this room.

But she was sick on moping around in this room, and in that bed, she wanted her room, she wanted to see through her balcony, she needed to get off this floor. She needed to get away from all the memories that haunted her on this floor. So with that, she got the adrenaline she needed, and slowly managed to reach the door. She leaned against the wall before she got to open the heavy wooden door. It was a small victory, as she crossed the threshold, and was happy that no one was in the hall, for if anyone had seen her, they would surely laugh at her appearance. Hair down, face pale, binding wrapped all around her torso and arms, covered only by a thin black nightgown would shock anyone around.

She had made her way to the stairs, using the wall as her support, and prepared herself for the journey ahead. Step by step, breath by breath, she had made it up the halfway up the stairs before she needed to sit down, or risk tumbling down. Another injury was the last thing she needed. She wouldn't let her exhaustion, she was so close to where she wanted to be, but the smiled that graced her lips was one of a victory won, for she was halfway to her room.

It was as she started to lift herself on the wall that she felt strong arms around her waist, and the forest scent coming from the only man who dared touch her that way.

Robin.

"You're the most stubborn woman I've ever met you know that. I should have known you would do something like this." He whispered as he took her weight in his arms, as she all but leaned all of herself against him.

"I just want to get to my room, I want my bed and I want my bath. So help me, or let me go." She whispered into the air between them, her eyes begging into his, trying to let him know just how much she needed to get out of there. It's bad enough she was locked up that long, but enough is enough, and she needs it more than she needs air at this point.

"You could have waited for me m 'lady, I would have helped you, You're in no condition to do this, alone none the less." He scolded her lightly, but helping her gain her balance regardless.

So off they went, stair by stair, as Robin all but carried her in his arms. He would pick her up in his arms in a heartbeat, but worried over the ribs that are yet to heal, and the arms that haven't quite reached their normal form, so he settles with the fact that she leans her weight on him, and he helps her until they reach the top of the stairs, and to the front of her chambers.

She smiles again to the fact that she's away from the room, away from her demons, at least the physical reminders of them anyway. So when he opens the door to her room, she all but forces him into it. All he did was chuckle at her enthusiasm, even though she was at a total loss of breath, he could see how happy she was to be there.

/

The water had done wonders. She felt like a human again, the tub with filled with rich scents of lavenders, and oils that smelled of her. He's helped her wash her back, and the arms that were still too tender to wash on their own. They didn't speak much during the whole thing, not when his hand lingered on her back lazily moving from side to side, not when his hands washed her hair, or caressed her face. No, only small smiles were shared, quick glances to each other eyes, and it was just right. No one had shown her that level of gentleness before, not the way it radiated of his body, allowing her to just enjoy their private moment. It allowed her to gain the strength she would need to heal her injuries, or at least speed up the process. Not even when she just let the water soak her body, eyes closed and just enjoying the moment. Minutes may have passed by, hours for that metter neither cared, as his heart swelled at seeing her so relaxed and content. She was a beautiful woman, and the thoughts that crossed his mind had to be pushed aside, for she was injured and in no state to do what his mind begged him to try.

He led her back to her bed, and a sigh of relief she let out when she felt the comfort of her own bed beneath her when it was all over as she was wrapped up in a towel.

"Do you want me to go so you can rest for a while?" He asked as he settled her under the covers, watching as her eyes closed.

"No, stay with me for a while." She asked him. And so he reached over got into her bed, and held her. She felt at peace finally, and she truly didn't know what it was that just being near him gave her strength, but she wouldn't question it now, she would just allow him to give her the strength her magic needed. So a while, she asked him to help her sit up on the bed.

"Regina are you sure you need to do this?"

"Robin, I can't just lay in bed anymore for the whole day while my sister is out there planning god knows what."

"How do you know she's even alive? Nothing's happened since you've returned, and from the looks of the sky that night, she must have not left in great shape either."

"It doesn't matter, I know she's still out there. I need to do this." She told him as she closed her eyes and began to summon her magic. She waved her hand over her arms, and shades of lavenders and lilacs and silvers surrounded her arms, she felt the bones mending, the skin reattaching, what she wasn't expecting was the pull it was taking on her. She felt the blood trickling down her nose, could hear Robin's voice telling her to stop, but she needed to get through this. She leaned forward, hovering her hand across her ribs, abdomen, and her other side. She felt the cold sweat that broke through her, but she was almost done.

What felt like a lifetime later, she collapsed back in bed, with her bones mended together, leaving only behind the tale tale sign of old bruising. Robin rushed to her side once more, her breathing was labored, but the smile she gave him was enough for him.

"Why do you insist on doing these things to yourself Regina? Look at you, you're exhausted." He asked her as he ran his fingers through her hair, removing those stubborn strands that were starting to dry against her face.

"I'm okay, now. Just one more day stuck in this bed, and tomorrow I'll be good as new." She whispered to him as she settled against his side.

"Granny won't be happy about this you know she's going to kill me." Robin spoke

"She'll be fine. A couple cursed words my way, and muttering under her breath, she'll get over it."

"You're a piece of work you know that." He laughed into her hair.

He still couldn't understand the need to be near her, or the pull both of them have for each other, but having her in his arms once more, it's like the world he was living before were full of greys, but the moment he met her, his whole world burst into color. He wouldn't lose that.

He shimmied down the bed so he could be at eye level with her, wanting to gaze into those chocolate brown eyes that captivated his soul.

"You scared me so much Regina. You'll never know the anguish I felt when I saw you disappear that day, and we couldn't help you, we couldn't even leave the premises. And then when you came back, lifeless, I've never felt that anguish since Marian. Promise me you won't do something like that." He pleaded as he looked at her in the eyes.

Blinking back tears, Regina brought her hands to his face, cupped his cheek and kissed his nose. "If it means keeping these people safe, keeping you and Roland safe, I will do what I need to do to keep it that. I'm sorry you were worried, but I can't let everyone pay for my mother's mistakes. This isn't about anyone here but me. I won't have any more bloodshed on my behalf Robin. I can't."

"But you're not alone anymore Regina. As much as you'd like to think otherwise, you're not alone."

"I've never known anything but being alone Robin. It's all I've ever been. No one stays long enough. You won't either. Something or someone will push you away, because the day you realize what I'm capable of you'll be run-" She was cut off from her rant when she felt his lips against hers. She couldn't help the surprised moan that came her, but suddenly she was kissing him back, all thoughts lost as she felt his tongue trace her lips, his hands settling in her hair, moving her ever so slightly to deepen their kiss. And just as quickly as it started it was over as he pulled back still cradling her head, his eyes staring truthfully into hers.

"I'm not going anywhere Regina. I know what people think of you, I know why people still fear you, and I know you're past. I've spent many days running from your knights. But you know what." He said as he went to kiss the tears that began to roll down her face. "That doesn't matter. You were a woman blinded by pain and misery, misjudged, and never given the opportunity to be just you. Many know your past, but they turn a blind eye to the pain. You were the Child Queen and no one protected you. And for that I am truly sorry, but who I have in my arms now is not that girl, not the Evil Queen, who I have the pleasure to kiss and hold is Regina Mills. And I'm not letting go. So please love, stop trying to pull away, stop trying to find an excuse for the feelings I know we share, and let me hold you and kiss you, so I can love you." He declared all the while looking into her eyes.

He pulled her into his arms, rolling them slightly so he was on his back, and she was on his chest while. She couldn't make heads or tails out of the whole situation, but she knew he spoke the truth. She just didn't know if she was ready to let someone in when her heart was so raw.

"I'm scared Robin" she admitted.

"I know, and to be honest I am too. But I think we've both be alone for too long. I can't explain this feeling and pull I have for you Regina, but all I can say is how deeply I care for you. I see you with Roland and my heart soars the way he comes to you, and the way you let him in. I know you're still hurting, but to see you with that elusive smile on your face when you with him, it's magical in its own sense."

She raised her arms to his face, with tear stained eyes and kissed him. Kissed him because she too felt the same. Frightened as she was, she felt safe in his arms, he gave her the strength she didn't know she needed while his son became another source of light in her life. Lazy kisses traded for hungry moans, dueling tongues, roaming hands, and if her towel slipped open, well neither of them care much for it.

She kissed him because she could.

A/N:

I'm sorry its taken this long, but my muse is leaving me blank sometimes, so i hope this isn't too terrible. Please take a moment to review for they do make me smile.

you can find me on tumblr under: justfangirlingit

enjoy your weekend loves!