Chapter Nine

It had been a long day, but then, Ben could hardly remember when days hadn't felt this drawn out. He had returned from Exegol with Finn and Chewie the evening before with no progress to report. All of today had been taken up by meetings. Ben wouldn't have been allowed to attend if not for his knowledge of the Force and the Dark side. His presence had been controversial, he knew. Tensions radiated from every member of the resistance. Their best fighter, their hero, had left them in exchange for the leader of those they had lived and died to oppose. No one seemed to agree and everyone seemed to have different ideas of what to do. Ben had heard a number of calls to eliminate the Empress before she gained any considerable power, as well as arguments that he himself should be executed for his crimes—which, Finn had reminded the group, wasn't up for debate in the time being. Many were still struggling to comprehend the fact their beloved Rey had truly turned to the Dark side. A few had even suggested that the Empress be held as a prisoner until they figured out what to do with her, but Ben knew her state was delicate despite her strength. Taking the offensive could destroy them, and it might destroy Rey as well. Would she understand that they had done what they thought they had to? Or would she feel betrayed and reluctant to trust in the future? He had grown to understand, eventually, that light will oppose dark—it was in their nature. But at first, finding his own mother leading the band of fighters that sought to destroy his new empire had struck him hard. It had confirmed what he had suspected for so long: he could never come home to her. Would Rey know her friends would accept her no matter what she had done? At least, Ben hoped that they would. Right now, the Empress's misdeeds were few, and Ben wanted to keep it that way. Sitting on the edge of his bed, he stared off into space. Despite hours of deliberation, it felt as if no one was any closer to a solution.

Ben blinked suddenly and looked behind him. He felt as though he had suddenly been hit with a wave of sound just high enough to be outside his hearing range. Rey stood before him, here, in his Resistance quarters on Ajan Kloss. "The bond, it…it still works?" he breathed.

"When I want it to," she replied.

Ben tried desperately to keep his mind from drifting. He was tired, and he'd had no time to prepare for her showing up in his room. Besides the wrappings on her forearms, she was clothed in one, long strip of sheer black fabric, looped and crossed over her body like the draping tunic from her scavenger days. A belt at her waist was all that kept the cloth in place, although Ben could already see more of her than he ever had. She had wonderful thighs, slender and strong…Focus, he told himself. He needed to find out to what extent they were still connected. "Neither one of us had much control over the bond before."

"Yes, when my power equaled your own," the Empress said. Ben watched her lips mold each word. "But that's the difference between you and me. You were weak. You never surpassed your masters. I killed mine and claimed his power for myself."

"I killed Snoke."

"With my help! You were complacent without me, nothing but Snoke's dog."

Ben seethed. She was right, of course. Without her he had been Snoke's to use. His search for power had made him weak, made him a thing, a weapon to be used by his masters. He wanted to be the one to wield himself. Did she want to use him as well? Rey had always made him feel safer, as though he weren't alone, but he desperately wanted not to be anyone else's weapon.

"No." She stepped toward him, speaking softly. "You won't be. I saw us both on the throne of the Sith, equals." She had reached him now, and stood above him, chin up, but eyes staring down to meet his. One of her fingers traced its way down his neck, catching on the collar of his shirt and tugging at the pin that held it closed. He shivered under her light touch. "We're strongest together," she whispered, her breath warm in his ear. "A dyad in the Force. We belong to each other."

The flame of passion that had flared up angrily within Ben was quick to accept the fuel the Empress offered, blazing into new forms.

Their ragged breathing drew together and the Empress's lips were on his, hard and hungry. Ben's entire body burned. She pushed him back against the bed. Ben lifted his hands instinctively to pull her closer and then stopped.

The woman on top of him wasn't Rey. Not his Rey. She never would have called him weak, called him nothing, he thought, he hoped. He had fallen for her perfect balance of gentleness and strength, the compassion she was quick to give and quick to retract. This was a shadow of what he had thought he had wanted, but now feeling her on him, he longed for the old Rey back. His Rey. No, she wasn't his. He had no right to decide how she should and shouldn't be. Maybe being Dark was her choice. Maybe…maybe this was how she had always been, underneath the shining exterior. Had she never really believed that there was more to him than Kylo Ren? Then what good was it, trying to be something better? No, no, she had told him to save her. He couldn't let that part of her down. Ben's hands found her shoulders and lifted her gently away from him. "I can't, Rey."

She stood up, looking up at him with big eyes, and then down at herself. Ben could see nearly all of her through her disheveled clothing. He felt something shift in her as her breathing grew shallow and accelerated and she crossed her arms over her chest. She blinked and failed to check the tears that rolled smoothly down her cheeks and over her flushed lips. Ben stood up, grabbing his crumpled blue cloak from the end of his bed. He reached out to drape it around her shoulders. Her flinch was nearly imperceptible but he felt it ripple out in the Force. He withdrew his hands. "Are you alright?"

She nodded slightly and took the cloak from him, pulling it tight around herself and sitting down next to him. "Thank you."

"Do you want to leave? It's okay if you do," Ben said softly.

"No." She leaned into him, cheek against his chest.

He wrapped an arm around her shoulders carefully, and smoothed wayward strands of hair back into place before tucking her head under his chin. "You're not alone," he whispered.

"Ben? How…" The name took him by surprise, but before he had time to react she had blinked and bit her lip. She shrugged off his cloak and stood up, turning to walk away and vanishing several paces later.

Author's Note: I definitely channeled a bit of my massive crush on Rey into Ben here.

Also how did everyone like the Empress's POV last chapter?