Chapter 2

Sara watched the TARDIS appear and smiled when it was finally solid.

"Hello," she said, and the door opened.

She walked inside and immediately stopped. The Doctor stood at the console, wearing a mischievous grin.

"I quite imagine this must be what the grandmother felt like right before the wolf ate her," Sara told him.

"Oh Sara, plain and tall, you worry too much."

He whirled around and started fiddling with the controls. The door closed behind Sara.

"I didn't expect to see you two…" she paused, realizing it was a one, not a two, in the room. "Where's Clara?"

"She had some bibs and bobs to attend. Couldn't make it this trip."

"That makes no sense. Try again."

"She had a funeral. I'm not good with funerals."

"I imagine not." Sara walked closer, watching him engage, push, pull, press, and type. "So where are you off to then?"

TARDIS appeared next to Sara. She smiled at her friend, but said nothing.

"The ball of Reginal Regional Proper Grand Kagrean."

"That's the mouth full. So some planet?"

"No. That's the title of the man," he reached under the controls and did something, "who is something of a king on Reginal Prime."

"That's still a mouthful." Sara sat down on the nearest set of stairs. "And what peril is he in?"

The Doctor stood up straight. "My dear Sara, plain and tall, he is not in trouble. He is having a ball."

She hesitated. "Such as a real ball? With gowns, dancing…"

"A masquerade ball, but yes. And he invited us."

"Us? Clara and you?"

"Me plus one. You're my plus one."

Sara laughed. "No. I am not your plus one. I know how you like to adventure, you love peril, and danger, and to mess about with time and space. I am not your plus one. That's Clara."

"There will be no adventure." He suddenly disappeared behind the control. "TARDIS, my dear, what is this flashing light for?"

"The cleaning droid by room 4,203 is malfunctioning. It has been for some time and you ask me about it every time you see the flashing light," TARDIS replied.

"Right." He reappeared. "As I was saying, Sara, no adventure, peril, danger, messing about with time and space. It is simply a ball."

"Simply does not exist in your vocabulary. Well, it does, you just don't really grasp the meaning of it."

He suddenly rushed over and sat down next to her. "TARDIS and I have talked from time to time about the adventures you go on."

"If you wish to call them that. I don't anymore after learning what you and Clara do."

"Adventure can be anything that is not something you do every day. Would you agree to that?"

"I could, if I didn't know you better."

He laughed, shaking a finger at her. "Not one to pull wool over your nose."

"Or eyes, for that matter," she kindly corrected him.

"Yes, well, wool or not, when was the last time you went to a ball?"

"I've never been."

"And one that was put on by royalty? That was lavish and succulent and fanciful and exuberant?"

"Since I've never been to one, I'll say never, again."

He laughed. She smiled.

"That's what his balls are like. And I even picked out the perfect gown for you. You'll be stunning."

"Doctor, who I do so like and very much enjoy talking about balls with—"

He laughed at her joke. She paused to give him the moment, then continued.

"I am not going to this ball, or anywhere else outside of the TARDIS with you. I don't like what you do."

"I told you, this ball is none of that. Think… Safe. It's safe."

"Even when you don't go looking for trouble, Doctor, it always finds you. Somehow, it always finds you."

"Not this time."

She narrowed her eyes. "No. This is wrong. There is no way you'd do something so dull, so mundane, like going to a ball."

"I would! I am going to! I am doing it for my dear TARDIS and my Sara, plain and tall."

"Oh? I'm your Sara now?"

"Well, technically, our – TARDIS and mine – but yes, at the ball, mine. My plus one."

She teetered on the edge of agreeing, then shook her head. "No. You are a magnet of trouble, peril, and disaster. I can't trust that."

"Do you really not trust me?"

"You? Yes. Your fate or whatever it may be, no. It doesn't seem to have your best interest at heart."

He considered that for a moment, then shrugged. "Now that I would agree with." He turned his eyes back to her, smiling. "It's a very pretty dress, matching shoes. You'll be stunning. And I spent a fortune on it."

"Now he's exaggerating," TARDIS chimed in.

"I did!" he retorted, smiling at her.

Sara looked in her direction. She was looking at the monitor with her hands pulled behind her back.

"Tell me, TARDIS, is what he says true about this ball? Is there no peril, danger, adventure?"

She looked at Sara. "As far as I can tell, he is correct. But, Doctor, Sara is correct in that you attract danger. It may be safe now, but when you walk through the door, all bets are off."

"Is this the part where human men beg to get their human women to go along with their plan?" he asked.

Sara and TARDIS both laughed. Sara laughed hard enough she began to cry.

"What did I say?" he asked.

She laid her hand on his shoulder. "Okay. Okay, okay, okay. I will go. But, the minute peril appears, danger starts up, or adventure becomes your kind of adventure, I am coming back to TARDIS and you're on your own to fix your own disaster."

"I think that's fair. Don't you think that's fair?" he asked TARDIS.

"No. Because you still won't tell me why you suddenly decided to do this. She is right about the fact that attending a ball is not you. It's boring, quiet, not terribly exciting by your standards."

He sat up straight. "Well, it seems to be that you and Sara have been going on these types of adventures quite often, and you seem to enjoy them, as does Sara, plain and tall. So I decided that while Clara had to be away, I'd give one of your adventures a try. Just to see what you two found so entertaining or interesting about them."

Sara was too surprised to think of what to say. TARDIS' silence was hard to decide since her face reflected no emotion. She slowly walked over to him and leaned over, staring for a long time into his face.

"I'm unconvinced," TARDIS told him. She walked away. "I'll be watching, Doctor. And if something appears out of the normal, I will come to take Sara away. I expect you to be attentive while she's with you, and protect her."

He smiled when TARDIS turned around. "I will take good care of our Sara, plain and tall, my dear."

TARDIS nodded her approval once and disappeared.

"Have you ever read the book?" he asked her.

"What book?"

"Sara, plain and tall."

"I can't say that I have."

He suddenly popped the heel of his hand against his forehead. "Of course you haven't! It won't be published for another sixteen years! Well, on one of your type of adventures with TARDIS, you should read it. It's in the library. I noticed when I peruse the logs you spend a lot of time there. Like reading do you?"

Sara laughed. "I do, and I will." She grew very serious. "Now, about this dress you're so proud of, let's see it. And I'll be the judge if it was worth the few dollars you spent on it."

"It was more than a few dollars, for someone. I didn't actually buy it, so much as borrowed it."

"You lifted it?"

"I borrowed it. I plan on putting it back. Eventually."

"So you lifted it."

"Oh trust me. This ball is so far from the time and place it was lifted from, no one will notice."

She shook her head but laughed again.

He stood and held his elbow out. She stood up next to him, sliding her arm around his, and the two headed down the hall at the top of the stairs.