A/N: Miraculously, I had a little time to write. Hope you enjoy!

The scream ripped through the silence and Gibbs bolted upright, swearing when he hit his head on the shell of his boat. Taking the steps two at a time, he reached his bedroom in record speed and when he saw Jenny crumpled on the floor, he immediately crossed the room.

"Jen?"

She jumped as he touched her, but she didn't move away. He reached out to wrap his arm around her shoulder and he pulled her into him, cradling her against his chest. She was shaking violently and as he stroked her hair, he tried to figure out what had caused her to end up on his floor.

"What happened, Jenny?"

"I keep dreaming about it. Every time I fall asleep...I can feel his hands all over me, I can taste the blood...How do I make it stop?"

He pressed a kiss to her temple, tightening his hold on her.

"It takes time. And I'll be here to help you. I promise."

She raised her eyes to his, and the fear he saw reflected in their depths nearly took his breath away. Burying her head in his chest, she tried to regulate her breathing, embarrassed at the way she had reacted to a dream.

"Jethro?" her voice was muffled against his chest.

"Hm?"

"Please don't give up on me."

Though her words were a mere whisper, he heard them as clearly as if she had shouted. He kissed her hair and took a deep breath, relishing the scent of her perfume.

"Never," he murmured into her hair.

As much as he hated to admit it, Gibbs was tired. He hadn't slept much in the past few days and the absence of his favourite redhead hadn't helped matters. She'd been in MTAC pretty much non-stop for the past three days, and he had only glimpsed her once as she'd gotten what he assumed was her hundredth cup of coffee for the day. He blinked as he tried to focus on the report he'd been writing, but his eyes simply refused to cooperate. He was just so damn tired.

His team was due back in the office in a few hours, and more than anything, he wanted to know how Jenny was doing. Sighing, he pushed his chair back from his desk and made his way towards the steps. He knew the Director would have to come back to her office eventually, and he intended to wait for her until she did. It didn't hurt matters that she had a particularly comfortable couch in her office.

Smirking slightly, he entertained himself by browsing at the papers she had left sitting on her desk before sitting on her couch. If he took a deep enough breath, he could have sworn that he could smell her perfume embedded into the leather. His eyes closed, and before he knew what had happened, he had fallen into a relaxing sleep that he would have denied needing until his very last breath.

When Jenny finally stepped into her office an hour later, she froze in her tracks as she caught sight of the former marine sleeping on her couch. Laughing softly, she shook her head and slipped off her heels, wanting to be as silent as possible. He looked more peaceful in sleep than he ever had awake and she ran her hand lightly through his silver hair. He shifted at her touch and she sighed. She'd been intending to take a nap of her own, but now that was looking impossible.

"Jethro."

She shook his shoulder gently and smiled when he tried to throw her off.

"Jethro, get up."

"M'sleeping."

"Yes, on my couch. Move."

He grunted in response and she frowned, shaking him again.

"Seriously, Jethro. I was going to take a nap. Move."

He shook his head, opening his arms.

"Room for you, too."

She frowned.

"You're not serious."

He shrugged, cracking open one eye.

"Suit yourself. S'comfortable."

She sighed, glaring at him.

"I know. It's my damn couch!"

He smirked and she sighed again. Sensing that she wasn't going to win this battle, she sat down next to him and he pulled her down to lay in his arms. She nestled into his embrace and it wasn't long before she found herself giving in to the exhaustion she had been fighting for so long.

When Gibbs opened his eyes, he was surprised to find that Jenny was nowhere to be seen. Just as he was preparing to search the building, she re-entered her office, offering him a tired smile. He returned it and watched her as she moved to sit behind her desk. He would never tell her, but he had always secretly loved to watch her work. He found her concentration endearing, and the way her eyes flitted around her screen was amusing in ways he couldn't describe.

Though he didn't know it, Jenny was in no way concentrating on the words in front of her. Her focus was consumed by trying to keep her breathing under control. She couldn't quite understand why, but she suddenly found it very difficult to breathe, and she could feel the hot prickling of tears in her eyes.

"Going for coffee. Want anything?"

She shook her head slowly and he frowned. He could sense that her demeanour had changed, but he wasn't sure exactly how. He glanced at her once more before walking out of the room and as soon as the door shut behind him, she blinked. Tears dripped onto her shaking hand and she stood to make her way unsteadily to her couch. Perhaps staying awake for nearly seventy-two hours straight hadn't been her brightest idea, but somehow she didn't think her current state could be chalked up to simple exhaustion.

Sinking down onto the soft leather, Jenny placed her head in her hands, trying to stop the sobs that racked her body. She didn't look up as she heard Gibbs return, and when he spoke, his voice was rough.

"Damn it, Jen."

She flinched at his harsh tone, and he frowned. He knelt in front of her, trying to catch her eyes and when she wouldn't look at him, he understood.

"I'm not angry at you. I'm angry at the sick bastard who did this to you."

She shook her head, still not looking at him, and he tried again.

"Hey...it wasn't your fault. You were attacked, Jen. And when I find the bastard who hurt you, I'm going to break his damn neck."

Her breathing was heavy, and he moved to sit next to her. She laid her head on his shoulder, gripping his shirt tightly in her fingers.

"I feel like I'm going to be sick," she moaned.

He kissed her hair gently and ran his fingers through the long red strands.

"Jethro..." her voice was low, pained, "I hate this so much."

Gibbs nodded, his hand still tangled in her hair. Jenny closed her eyes and sighed, willing her heartbeat to slow. The beep of her intercom made her glance up and as Cynthia's soft voice filled the room, she frowned.

"Excuse me, Director. You're needed in MTAC."

She stood, swaying slightly on her feet and Gibbs reached out to steady her. He looked down at her seriously and as she tried to walk away, he placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Jen. You're exhausted. This can wait."

Her head shook, and she raised her eyes to his. The viridian irises seemed to be screaming that she wished she could agree, but she stepped away.

"I have work to do."

He knew it would be pointless to try to convince her to stay so he simply nodded. She swept past him without another word and he frowned as her door swung shut behind her. Making a mental note to try talking to her later, Gibbs decided to make his way back down to his desk. Maybe something would come along to distract him.

Hours later, Gibbs frowned as he stared at his screen. He hadn't seen Jenny since she'd left for MTAC, and yet he knew she hadn't left the building. He'd been periodically glancing up at the catwalk to see if she passed, and as it neared 21:00, he sighed. Finally, he decided that he wasn't going to wait for her any longer and stood from his desk, making his way to the steps. He scanned himself into MTAC and as his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he searched for Jenny.

He found her near the middle of the room, her arm resting on her chair, barely holding her head up. Her eyes were watching the screen, but he seriously doubted if her mind registered any of the images that flickered across it. She glanced at him as he sat down next to her, and he offered her a smile. Returning it tiredly, she checked to make sure no one was observing them before she spoke.

"What are you doing here, Jethro?"

"Wondering where you were. It's late. You should go home."

Her head shook slowly.

"I can't. I have work to do. Besides, it's not that late."

"21:00. You need to rest."

She frowned, grabbing his wrist to check his watch.

"I didn't realise it was so late."

He looked at her seriously, and her tired eyes met his slowly.

"Jen. Go home. If anything major happens, they'll call you."

She was silent for a long moment and he wondered what could possibly be going through her mind. Finally, she nodded and he smiled.

"Get your coat. Cold out."

He lightly touched her shoulder and as he stood, he held out his hand. She took it and he led her to the door, smiling as she walked out in front of him.

"Jen?"

She turned.

"Thanks."

Her eyes filled with confusion and she frowned.

"For what?"

"Letting me help you."

Jenny hated being bored. She'd already finished the work she'd brought home with her, and now she was pacing her study, trying to find something to occupy her time. She hadn't wanted to admit it to Gibbs, but she'd been deliberately working more frequently, trying to convince herself that her life was perfectly normal. Most of the time, she was able to believe the lie, but when she had nothing to distract her, she fought to ignore the panic that she felt rising in her chest.

Her eyes flickered to the decanter of bourbon on her shelf and she shook her head. She'd promised herself after the last time she'd spent drunk of Gibbs' house, she wasn't going to drink heavily again. Managing it hadn't been easy, but so far, she had only taken the occasional drink after work. Picking up her phone, she sighed as she dialed his number.

"Yeah. Gibbs."

"Are you busy?"

"No more than usual. You okay?"

"I'm bored."

"What?"

"I'm bored," she repeated, "I need something to distract me."

"Isn't that what television is for? Or books?"

"Or building a boat in your basement?"

"Hush."

She laughed and ran a hand through her hair.

"Well, if you aren't going to help me, I don't want to talk to you."

"Not much I can do from here, Jen," he reminded her.

Jenny blew her hair out of her face, rolling her eyes. As if he could see her, Gibbs laughed and she frowned.

"Anything else?"

"No. I guess not."

"If you do need anything, call me."

"I will."

He hung up and she tossed her phone in the chair behind her desk. It bounced and landed somewhere with a clatter. Knowing she had already resigned herself to a drink, she poured a generous amount into a crystal tumbler. Shuddering as she swallowed, Jenny walked back into her living room , decanter and tumbler in hand, and as she sank down on her couch, she sighed to herself. Surely she could handle a few drinks.

As his eyes slowly opened, Gibbs could sense, rather than see, that he was no longer alone in his basement. His body tensed instinctively and he found himself searching blindly for a weapon. As his other senses began to awaken, he frowned. The distinct scent of perfume filled the room and as he realised that he recognised the perfume, he slowly relaxed.

"Planning on shooting me, Jethro?"

"Jen?"

He could see her now, leaning against the skeleton of his boat, her eyes bright in the darkness. He reached out to click on the lamp he kept near the old couch he had, and as the dim light flooded the space, he blinked rapidly.

"What're you doing here?"

"Told you I was bored," she said simply.

He frowned. There was more to her unexplained appearance than she was telling him, but he didn't have the slightest idea what else it could be. He sat up slowly and when he took in her clothing, he was even more confused. Normally, she dressed impeccably when her drivers dropped her off, but the yoga pants and oversized shirt suggested that she'd driven herself. Jenny didn't drive often, unless she was trying to avoid being seen, so she must not have wanted her security detail to know she'd come to him.

She still hadn't moved, but as he stood, she smiled. Her hair was down, slightly tangled, and her makeup was smudged a bit around her emerald eyes. She'd been crying.

"What's wrong, Jenny?"

"Nothing."

He was directly in front of her now, and he could detect another scent, barely noticeable under the camouflage of her perfume. She smelled of bourbon and he suddenly understood.

"Didn't want to drink alone?"

A frown crossed her face and she tilted her head slightly in confusion.

"I haven't been drinking."

Even she could feel the twitch of her right eye, and he glared at her.

"Fair enough," he said sarcastically, "then walk to the table and back without stumbling."

She glared.

"Are you serious?"

He cocked an eyebrow at her and she sighed, pushing off of the boat. She made it halfway to the table before her foot slipped and it wasn't until she turned to glare at him again that he noticed she was barefoot. No wonder she had seemed so small. He walked closer to her, looking down at her sadly.

"Jen."

She sighed, running her hand through her hair.

"Fine. Yes, I had a few drinks. More than a few. Satisfied?"

"Did you drive?"

Her head shook.

"Taxi."

He nodded, reaching for his own bottle of bourbon. She couldn't tear her eyes away from his throat as he swallowed, watching the tendons and muscles in his neck move, and she frowned. What was wrong with her? Why had she seriously thought she could lie to him?

Gibbs poured her a good measure of bourbon in an empty mason jar and as she took a long drink, she closed her eyes. She jumped as his hand reached out to brush against her cheek and when she looked up at him, he smiled.

"Where are your shoes?"

She shrugged. He picked up his sander, knowing she wouldn't mind him working and as he turned to his boat, he saw her lean against the table. He waited, knowing she would speak when she was ready, and tried to pretend that he wasn't worried.

"Jethro?"

He smirked. He'd known that he wouldn't have to wait long. Alcohol had always made Jenny more talkative than usual, and when something was bothering her, it became ten times worse.

"Hm?"

"Why is this so hard for me?"

He turned to look at her and frowned. She was picking up various tools from his desk, examining them as though she'd never seen them before, and he suddenly realised that she was nervous.

"I mean, I've been shot before. More than once. I've been kidnapped. Had the shit beaten out of me by old boyfriends. Tortured. Why is this so hard for me to move on from?"

She waited for him to answer and he looked at her carefully, staying silent.

"It shouldn't be this hard, Jethro. I hate feeling like this. I've never been this fucking fragile before and it makes me sick."

"There's no rule book, Jen."

"Why do I feel guilty? I feel like it's my fault."

He shrugged.

"Maybe you should. Maybe this is all your fault."

Jenny's eyes flashed, and he knew he had her.

"That's not fair, Jethro,," she began, her words more than a little slurred, "I didn't ask for him to pin me down in that parking lot. I didn't ask for him to hit me, and I sure as hell didn't ask to be raped! It's not my fault."

She had picked up his knife and was pointing it at him accusingly. She turned it over in her hands thoughtfully, mesmerised by the glint of the light on the blade.

"Sometimes, I wish I could just cut it out of me. That part of me that feels scared every time I'm alone in the dark. I loved the dark. Loved the night and I loved being able to enjoy it by myself if I wanted. He took that away from me. I don't even feel safe opening my curtains anymore. I used to lie in bed and look at the sky before I slept. Remember?"

He nodded, thinking about the many times she had kept him awake in Paris talking of constellations and the sheer vastness of the universe.

"I can't do that now. How is that fair? What gave him the right to take away the parts of myself that I still love? This isn't my fault, Jethro."

He reached for the knife still held in her hand and gently set it back on the table. She raised tear-filled eyes to his, and when she reached for him, he gathered her in his arms. She whimpered against his chest, but refused to let herself cry.

"Shh..." he kissed her hair, "Come on, Jen. Let's go upstairs."

She nodded and he led her to the steps, guiding her carefully so that she didn't fall. When they reached his room, he opened the window slightly and she frowned.

"What are you doing?"

He didn't answer, leading her to the bed. He pulled her into his arms as they laid down and he pointed to the window.

"Look, Jen."

She followed his finger and frowned.

"What?"

"Cassiopeia. Your favourite constellation."

Jenny's eyes lit up as they landed on the stars and she turned slightly to look at him.

"Why?"

"You deserve to be able to look at the night sky whenever you want. That sick bastard is never going to lay a hand on you again, and I'm going to keep you safe."

She kissed him and settled back into his warm embrace. Her eyes stayed locked on the stars that she'd never thought she would feel safe enough to see again and when she finally fell asleep, Gibbs kissed her cheek lightly.

"Love you, Jen."

Jenny cursed under her breath as she hung up her phone. She'd just been asked—no, ordered was more like it—to hand over jurisdiction to the FBI on the latest case Gibbs was working on, and she knew he wasn't going to take it well. Rubbing her temple slowly, she wished more than anything that she could take a nap to mentally prepare for the rest of her day, but wishing was pointless. She would simply have to grit her teeth and get through it as best she could. Sometimes, she really wondered why she had accepted this job.

The door of her office opened so forcefully that it bounced off the wall and almost closed on its own. Jenny glared at Gibbs as he approached her desk, anger evident in every fiber of his being.

"What the hell, Jen?! You gave our case to the FBI?"

"I had to."

"You could have fought against it! They're just going to screw up everything we worked for!"

"Close the door, please."

"You really don't want me to do that."

"Close the goddamned door, Jethro."

His eyes widened slightly, but he did as he was told. As he turned to face her again, he could detect the barely-contained rage that caused the slight tremor in her body, and he sighed. Though he knew it hadn't been her fault, he needed someone to direct his anger towards.

"Sit down, Jethro."

"No."

"Then listen. I had absolutely no choice but to turn over our jurisdiction. The body we found had been dumped at the Naval base, not killed there. Not our case."

"Come on, Jen. You know—"

"What I know, Agent Gibbs, is that I am still your boss. I'm not your little probie anymore, and whether you like it or not, you do still have to respect my authority, regardless of whether you respect me."

"That's bull, Jen. You know damn well that I respect you."

"Do I?" her eyebrow arched and his glare intensified, "You undermine me constantly, you barge into my office like you own it, and you question even the simplest of orders. You don't respect me at all."

She was still shaking, and he walked closer to her, expecting to see tears in her eyes. They were dry, but there was a coldness in them that he hadn't seen in quite awhile.

"Jen," his voice was softer, "you honestly don't believe that I respect you?"

Her silence was all the answer he needed. He took a step closer and she automatically stepped back, shaking her head.

"Get out of my office."

"Jenny—"

"Now, Agent Gibbs."

He stared at her for a moment longer, trying to decide if she was serious. Sensing that she was, he nodded, opening the door and when it closed behind him, she sighed as she sank down into her chair.

"Gibbs! I thought we lost our case to the FBI. What are you doing down here?"

He offered a smirk and handed the scientist a CAF-POW. She smiled and grabbed it from his hand, immediately sucking down the drink.

"Do you have anything on our other case?"

She frowned.

"What other case?"

"The one you're supposed to be working with Ducky on. The Director, Abs."

Finally, it dawned on her and she sighed, shaking her head.

"No. Afraid not, Gibbs. There's just not enough to go on. The video doesn't give us a clear look at his face, no DNA to run, nothing distinctive other than the tattoo that millions of other people have."

He nodded. Disappointing though it was, Gibbs hadn't really expected any different. Abby was watching him curiously, and he tilted his head.

"Problem, Abby?"

"It's just...you usually discuss this when the Director's here, too. Is something wrong?"

He shook his head.

"Gibbs...is she okay?"

"She's fine, Abs."

Something must have shown in his face, because Abby frowned. Her bright green eyes narrowed at him and she shook her head.

"You guys had a fight, didn't you? Gibbs! You can't fight with her right now! She's upset, she's stressed, she's probably scared. You have to fix this."

He simply stared at her before turning and as he walked towards her door, she called out after him.

"The kids don't like it when Mommy and Daddy fight."

Abby's words circled around in his head for hours after he had gone home from work. He hadn't seen Jenny since she'd told him to leave her office, and he figured that she had preferred it that way. Still, no matter how angry he'd been, he didn't want her to work herself to death. Her car had still been there when he'd left, so he knew that she was probably in MTAC overseeing some kind of op. Picking up his phone, he sighed as he called her, wondering when their lives had become so difficult.

She didn't answer, not that he had truly expected her to, and he dialed her office phone. It too went to her voicemail, and that struck him as odd. It wasn't like Jenny to ignore her calls when she was in her office, regardless of how busy she was. He tried again, and this time, she answered on the fourth ring, her voice slightly breathless.

"Shepard."

"Why are you still working?"

She sighed as she realised who had called and he knew if he could see her, she would be frowning.

"Jethro, unlike some people, I actually do the work my superiors ask me to do."

He smirked and imagined her glaring at him.

"Fair enough."

There was a slight pause and he knew she was trying to figure out why he had called. Her working late was nothing out of the ordinary, so it must have been for a specific purpose.

"Is there anything you needed, or was this call merely to annoy me?"

"Both. Wanted to say that I shouldn't have yelled at you today. Wasn't your fault, and I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

She was silent for a long moment, and he took a drink from his mason jar. When she finally spoke, her voice was warmer, floating down the line softly.

"Thank you."

"I'll let you go. Don't work too late."

"I won't."

Just as he was about to hang up, a thought occurred to him and he put the phone back to his ear, hoping he hadn't lost her.

"Jen?"

"Yes?"

"Just so you know: I respect the hell out of you."

He hung up and smirked as he took another drink. Knowing Jenny, she would work straight through the night, and since they had the weekend off, he intended to work on his boat until she called again. He picked up a hammer and nails, intent on making valuable progress and made his way to his boat. Perhaps his phone call had been enough to convince her that he really did care.

Jenny Shepard crept quietly down the stairs, hoping to find one Jethro Gibbs working on his boat and frowned when she didn't see him. She smiled softly when she realised that he was underneath the shell, his even breathing telling her that he was asleep. Not wanting to wake him, she backed towards the steps again and slowly made her way up them.

"Jen?"

Damn. She should have known better than to try to sneak up on a marine. She turned, looking at him curiously, and he frowned.

"What time is it?"

"03:45," she replied, running her hand through her hair.

"Didn't want to stay at your house?"

She shook her head, her eyes worried.

"I can leave. I didn't mean to bother you. I just figured you would be awake, and—"

"Jen. Stay."

Nodding, she walked down the steps again, and shook her head when he offered her a drink. He kissed her as soon as she was near enough, and she smiled as he wrapped his arms around her.

"You okay?"

Jenny was silent for so long that he wasn't sure she'd heard him. He was just opening his mouth to repeat his question when she spoke, her voice muffled by his chest.

"No."

He led her to the couch she had slept on the night of her attack and as they sat, he ran his thumb over the back of her hand.

"If it's what I said today—"

"No, Jethro. I know you were just angry at the situation. I'm just tired. In so many more ways than one. I'm trying to be everything to everyone, and I don't think I can do it anymore. I just...I can't."

He nodded, pressing a kiss to her hair.

"You're human, Jen. You're not superwoman, no matter what you want people to believe. It's okay to slip up every now and then."

She looked at him, pulling him in for a kiss and as she held onto him, he could feel her shaking. Breaking away, her eyes met his and they were filled with such honesty that he almost couldn't bear to look.

"Jethro...I love you. I know I haven't been the easiest person to live with right now, but please don't leave me. I don't know what I would do if I lost you."

He kissed her again, holding her as tightly as he dared.

"Not going anywhere, Jen."

She fought the tears she felt and buried her face in his chest.

"I've never loved anyone the way I love you. I can't lose you."

He frowned at how violently she was shaking and pushed her back enough that he could see her eyes.

"What's wrong, Jen? Where's this coming from?"

She broke his gaze, moving her body as close to his as she possible could.

"I don't like fighting with you," she murmured, "Not like that. It's one thing when we fight to relieve the tension at work, but I don't like serious arguments."

He nodded. Sometimes, their arguments were the best form of foreplay, but when they deliberately tried to hurt each other, it was another matter entirely.

"I can feel the darkness closing in, and I feel like I'm falling. I know that it's weak, but God help me, I need this. I need you."

He stood, holding out his hand and she took it, letting him pull her to her feet. Leading her to the stairs, he swept her into his arms, kissing her before walking up. As he carried her up to his bedroom, he could tell she was dying to ask what he had planned, but something in his eyes told her not to speak. He climbed in the bed after placing her on it, and pulled her into his arms.

"Jethro, what are you doing?"A.

"Showing you that you're not weak."

He held her against his chest and kissed the top of her head gently.

"I need you too, Jen. And right now, we're going to be together. No sex, no pressure, just you and me."

She smiled and nestled closer, breathing in the comforting scent of sawdust.

"And you don't have to try to be everything to me. There's only one thing I want you to be."

"What's that?"

"All I want you to be is Jenny. No more, no less. You already are everything to me."

For the first time in years, the tears that fell from Jennifer Shepard's green eyes were tears of happiness.

A/N: I hope you liked it. Sorry my updates will be random for awhile.