A/N: Here is another chapter for you.
Before anything else, I'd like to invite you to join the Harmony & Co. (18+) Facebook Group. The most awesome community of Harry and Hermione Shippers on the planet!
Secondly, plugging my new one-shots: Nerds Win In Life; Always Constant; and The Golden Girl. I wrote the last two for a writing challenge for Harmony & Co. So if any of you out there have already read those one-shots, I owe the group for providing the prompt which led to those fics.
Lastly, I recently got invited to join a writer's forum here on FFN. So you'll be seeing more one-shots from me soon. Please do not fret because I will still regularly update My Cheating Heart. I sort of have this crazy goal to finish the story before 2019 ends. So I am keeping my fingers crossed!
Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. It is just a girl-bonding session that our dear Chief needs.
Looking forward to your reviews, faves, and follows.
My Cheating Heart
By: tweety-src-clt9
Chapter Twenty-four: What Does Love Feel Like?
It seemed ironic that despite Abim's arrival in Britain the next day, Hermione's afternoon is not busy. Not at all. Everyone would expect her to be running about, but all the test she needs to do on Harry's blood was finished in the morning. The test was just a mere confirmation of the potency of his magical ability. His blood had some essence of basilisk venom and phoenix tears, that she was already able to confirm from the results of the blood sample analysis she conducted this morning. This makes Harry, the only living human to be immune to any sort of snake venom. Furthermore, the healing properties in the phoenix tears makes Harry immune to many forms of poisons. It's like his magic and the mixture of the essence of the two creatures in his blood, made him super dosed with some sort of elixir of health against harmful things he could swallow, may it be food, liquids, and potions. His bloodstream is filled with a magically recharging personal vitamin.
Now here she is again, sitting by her desk and reading progress reports of each patient from Rosier and Irie. There is an obvious pattern. Patient A, Freddie Weasley, had the worst condition, and the severity of the infection coincides with Irie's report on who's who on his list of the order of victims. Once the cure is set, Freddie will have to be treated first and so on until the last pureblood patient. After that, a vaccine formula will be created and distributed to the non-purebloods. And then, case closed. She and the rest of the team will be heading back to Switzerland.
When she leaves this place, she will be safe from all the prying eyes of the British magical community. She will be away from the intrigue, the rumor mill, and the Weasleys. She would be away from Ginny and the rest of the ginger-haired family. Lastly, she'll be away from Harry again.
But do I want to stay away from Harry?
That was the million-dollar question. Because in all honesty, she is so confused.
On one hand, she feels really bad for being super reliant on Harry for his help in finding the cure for this blasted epidemic. She knew that one of the reasons why he is so eager to be a test subject and a supplier for potions ingredients (the basilisk venom and his blood), is because of his guilt and love for her. This makes her feel bad because she did not want to take advantage of him.
On the other hand, even though she had forgiven him a long time ago, the knowledge that he slept with other women and paraded them in front of her still bothers her. What makes her even more confused is Viola's statement when they talked, that he's never been with anyone after that night he made that rash comment about hating the baby. She needed validation. She just wants to know if she can trust him again.
To make it even more confusing, Harry seems to be very determined to accomplish every item on that bloody checklist. The only items he is missing are numbers 2, 9, and 10. Item 2 is having all his fuck buddies ask for her forgiveness. Item 9 having him kneel outside the Malfoy home, which she would personally hex him for if he does. And lastly, Item 10 which states that he grants her the divorce after failing to secure her affections. In a short period, he's made very good progress on the list and there was Viola's confession. Not to mention the whole business of being the potential Master and Mistress of Death if they go ahead with whatever ritual necessary for the life-altering commitment they plan to risk just to get a second chance with Viola Lily. So many things have happened that she's just unsure of what to do and how to feel anymore. To add to all her problems, there was a very real threat to her life.
And yet, despite all that has happened, she had never felt so alive. She has never felt so human and so in tune with her feelings not since Viola Lily died. She was used to her robot-like self. All work, no emotions. But being back in Britain, being with Harry again, it's like the walls she built around herself are slowly crumbling down.
Her thoughts were interrupted when there was a knock on her door. I swear, if it's another Weasley, I'm going to snap! Or file a restraining order! Or go all Lady Potter on them!
"Come in", she said. When Astoria Malfoy entered, she had a big smile on her face.
"Woah! You seem too happy to see me, 'Mione. Why?", Astoria chuckled as she placed a bag of food on her desk.
"I'm just happy it's you. I thought it was another Weasley", she said with exasperation.
"I see. Annoying lot they could be eh, demanding too", her friend agreed.
"You have no idea", she said sarcastically.
"Lord Potter handed this bag of food to me, to give to you. He says he's busy so he just wants you to get this", Astoria glanced at the takeout bag.
"Oh. How nice of him", she muttered. She was trying hard not to blush at the knowing smirk on her friend's face.
"Very nice of him indeed", Astoria teased.
"Tori, are you busy right now?"
"Not really, 'Mione. Why?"
"Can you stay with me for a while? We can share the food. Knowing Harry, he'd be sending over a lot. Besides, I need someone to talk to", she believes that this is her chance to help sort out all the polarizing thoughts in her head.
"Of course, I'll stay. And thanks for the offer but I already had lunch before coming here. I was on my way to see you if you needed any help in preparation for Deputy Omenuko's arrival and I ran into Lord Potter and well – here I am", her friend was like her. She tends to blabber sometimes. She's always found a soul sister in Astoria.
"That makes sense. Thanks for the offer but I finished the test and analysis for one of the potions ingredients. But I do hope you and Draco could extend your hospitality for Abim? Seeing as I am currently staying at Harry's. Of course, Abim can stay at Harry's but – ", now it was her turn to blabber.
"It will be an honor to have Deputy Omenuko stay at our home. For sure Draco will be so happy since he enjoys potion making very much. Maybe I have to rein in his excitement upon seeing the world's best medicinal potions maker", Astoria said.
Their eyes met and they shared a laugh over Draco's possible reaction to meeting one of his heroes. When Hermione got the invitation to be part of the ICW Medical Research Department, Draco was so excited for her since she would get to meet and work with the great Abimbola Omenuko.
Hermione's eyes went to the takeout bag Astoria brought to her office. She didn't even realize that she was too lost in analyzing her thoughts and emotions that it was already half past one in the afternoon. Amazing how Harry seems to have an instinctual knowledge of whether or not I already ate…
"Do you mind if I eat while we talk?", she said sheepishly.
"Oh no. Go ahead", Astoria grinned. She opened the takeout bag. To her surprise, there was a single white rose with its stem cut short just so it could fit inside. The rose had a red ribbon attached to the stem so that a tiny roll of parchment could be attached. She carefully took out the rose from the bag and settled it on top of the reports she read. When she saw the food he bought – a vegan burger, some fries, and strawberry milkshake – her mouth watered. It was clear that he remembered her comment at breakfast about cutting on the calories in preparation for Christmas. Harry even added charms to preserve the crispiness of the fries and to prevent the milkshake from melting.
She sat the food to one side of the desk. Away from the reports. She decided to read the note first. Untying the red ribbon, she unrolled the tiny piece of parchment.
Hope I got the flower choice right this time.
Enjoy the food.
See you at home,
H
She was unaware of the silly grin that graced her face upon reading the note. It was short but it oddly seems so sweet. Before she could stop herself, she picked up the rose and drew it close to her nostrils. She sighed. Harry Potter's moves keep getting better and better the more time she spent with him.
As she recalled the symbolism for a single white rose, her heart fluttered. It was a gesture of strong emotion and devotion. It indicates great esteem for the receiver and is a declaration of love and hope. The white rose means spiritual love, charm, and humility. In short, Harry Potter nailed his flower choice this time around!
"Well if you want to giggle like a schoolgirl, I won't tell on you Mione", her thoughts were interrupted by Astoria's teasing voice. She blushed. This is like being a teenager again! Harry Potter, what are you doing to me?
"Shut it", she huffed but it was a hard sell. She could feel her cheeks flush like a tomato. Astoria giggled and she joined in.
"Oh my gosh, Mione! You are still in love with him!", Astoria squealed in excitement.
"I am not… sure actually. I mean he's trying hard and all. And I admit that I am deeply touched by the change I've seen in him. And I know he's not just acting out. He's been consistent in the changes he made in himself ever since I left. I know that. I've seen too many proofs of that already… And I would not lie to you, I must admit that even if I try not to, he makes my heart flutter and – ", she was beginning to get frantic.
"Breathe, girl. Breathe. It's okay. No need to speak a mile a minute. Let's process everything together. So, spill. But one step at a time. I can stay and talk", Astoria reached out and took her hand, giving it an understanding squeeze.
"Thanks, Tori. I need someone to vent to", she grinned sheepishly.
"Okay, so tell me how do you feel", Astoria said gently.
"Well, to be honest, I am scared. What if it is all happening so fast? I mean he's so sincere in his guilt. Not that I want him to feel bad, but it's so amazing to see him working so hard to fix his mistakes. You know what I mean right?", she admitted.
"Yes, I understand. Draco was in a bad place too, remember? And his desire to better himself drew me to him", she could hear the understanding in her friend's voice. In a way, they are in a similar situation.
"And then he does these little things. Subtly taking care of me. Making sure that my needs are being met. Always going out of his way and his comfort zone to be of help. It's like, he's like – oh, I don't know! It's just like he's the Harry I fell in love with. You know, my best friend", her hands were making wild gestures. After weeks of being exposed to Harry James Potter, this is the first time that she ever took a moment to process all that has happened.
"Well that's great, isn't it? I mean it is very good that he is so sincere and all", Astoria smiled.
"Yes, it is. But I still have some uncertainties", she said in a small voice.
"What uncertainties?"
"He cheated on me. I want to know why. I have so many questions but I don't know how to ask them. He's doing so much but, I – I don't know. Do you think we need marriage counseling? I mean you studied psychology aside from obstetrics and childcare, so what is your professional opinion?", she didn't care if she sounded so needy and whiny. Astoria Malfoy nee Greengrass will never judge her.
"I don't think you need a full counseling session. What if you just get a moderated session for you to ask your questions. So that you can finally get your answers. I am sure he has some for you as well", Astoria started rubbing and pressing her right hand to help ease her tensed nerves.
"What do you suggest?"
"Why not ask him to talk, just both of you. But you each take a dose of veritaserum. Ten questions each and that is it. I can moderate if you want", her friend offered.
"I'll ask Harry if he agrees. Ten questions seem a lot but maybe, if we both take the time to prepare for the session, we walk in knowing what to ask", she said.
"Yes. You both come in with a list of ten questions in hand. As soon as all ten are answered, I would give the flushing potion. Then it's the other party's turn to get dosed and be asked. That way, there is a semblance of control. I can leave during the questioning session. Just call for me when each set of ten questions is asked", her friend added.
"Thank you, Tori. You don't know how much this means to me. You and Draco have been there for me ever since I made that choice to leave Harry", this time, it was her who reached out for Astoria's hand.
"You are welcome, Hermione. It is I who should be thanking you. When you took that chance to listen to Draco's offer of help, you have helped him lessen the guilt he's been feeling. You helped me and my husband in that matter. More importantly, the friendship we share with you is very dear to both of us", Astoria said with sincerity.
"Love you, Tori."
"Love you too, Mione."
"Since you'll be our moderator when Harry agrees, maybe you should know that I kissed him. I'm not sure if that has an impact on your –"
"Get out of here! Did you kiss him? When? Oh, my Merlin!"
"Shush! Your voice is too loud. The auror guards might hear", she admonished.
"Sorry", Astoria blushed.
"It just happened. He did something miraculous that ended the curse on the item that caused the epidemic. I was so happy. I ran into his arms and hugged the stuffing out of him. I pecked him on the lips and ran away to look for Irie and Rosier. It did not even sink into me that I kissed him. I only realized that I did, when all three of us were walking back to the laboratory. Since I was distracted, I did not even notice if there was a difference in Harry's behavior after the kiss", she explained.
"Oh, so Lord Potter did something that ended the curse. It figures. He's rumored to be one of the most powerful wizards in Britain", Astoria stated.
Oh Tori, not just in Britain. He's the most powerful wizard alive. If you only knew that Harry Potter is more or less, the successor of Merlin as the Master of Death. He is Merlin's equal in magic.
"Yes. Even when we were at Hogwarts, he always did crazy and extraordinary feats of magic", she remarked.
"Well, that makes you suitably matched then. Most Powerful Wizard in Britain. Brightest Witch of the Age. Just like Merlin and Morgana, although hopefully with a happier ending", her friend stated with a dreamy look on her face.
Oh shit. Tori is getting closer and closer to hitting the mark. Must think of a diversion.
"Tori, what does love feel like? I mean what does loving Draco feel like? It's been so long since I felt love for a man that I am confused about how I feel about Harry", she decided that it's best to distract Tori by talking about Draco. Her friends were madly in love like that. She used to be jealous of the love they shared back when she was bitter. But as time passed, she learned to admire the love shared by her friends. They complemented each other very well. Their love is a beautiful sight to behold.
"Well, I did not like him at first. I am younger than you and I saw how mean he was at Hogwarts. So, I hated him in a little. But after the war, he looks so devastated and lost. I pitied him and started talking to him. Maybe he was desperate for anyone to just listen to him and be there for him, but he opened up to me. The more I learned about his horrors; I saw a different side to him. Lo and behold, I fell in love with him. I asked him out which shocked him but he said yes", Astoria had a fond smile on her face as she talked about her husband.
"Wow, I never knew that", she said. She always thought that Draco and Astoria started as some sort of pureblood marriage contract that had a happy ending.
"I guess all I can say is, for me, love is absolute acceptance. I accept Draco's past and I hold an optimistic belief in the man I know he could be. In return, he learns to accept my trust in him. He sees it as a responsibility he has to keep and nurture because very few people are willing to give him a chance because of his past. Our relationship works because it is not about a fiery passion but more of unconditional acceptance. We've seen the worst in each other but we make the conscious effort each day to make the relationship work. He is my confidante, and I am his. We are partners not just in our work, but in building our lives. He says I make him a better man. And to me, he helps me broaden my reality of the world. By sharing his dark past, I learn to appreciate how lucky I was that my parents never pressured me like his father does", to her surprise, Tori now had tears in her eyes.
"That is so beautiful Astoria", she sighed dreamily.
"Yes. I guess to me, love is friendship on fire", her friend had a big smile on her face as she elegantly wiped the tears from her face.
"Love is friendship on fire. That makes sense. It's so – well, it is very Draco and Astoria Malfoy", she had a big smile on her face.
"Oh, it is on fire indeed! Sex with Draco is brilliant", the blonde woman swooned. She playfully threw a parchment on her friend that she easily swatted away.
"Tori!"
"So prudish, Chief Healer Granger", her friend teased.
"You are breaking our deep girl bonding sesh here because of that sex comment", she huffed.
"Oh, I am just warming you up, Mione. After all, you're bound to make love with Lord Potter again, after all these years. Besides, you can't deny that the bloke is too good-looking. He must have your knees shaking with that smoldering gaze of his, eh?", the blonde woman wiggled her eyebrows playfully.
"I'm not even sure that I'm in love with him", she denied. And I will never admit to anyone that I still find Harry Potter as the most attractive man I have ever seen. Even at wandpoint, I will never admit that. Never.
"Remember dear, love is friendship on fire. You and Lord Potter seem to have the friendship spot on. I'm just preparing you for the fire", Astoria stood up from her seat and left her sitting slack-jawed in her office.
She was sipping her milkshake and eating the burger and fries but Astoria's definition of love is still on her mind...