And Your Future's Paved In Gold

"Hey Drea? Are you almost ready to go?" Opie called out through the door.

I threw my shirt to the floor replying, "No! Can you come in here?"

Opie didn't hesitate to come in but froze in his spot when he saw me. I didn't get a chance to see his face because he was throwing his hands over his now closed eyes as he cried out, "Jesus Christ, Drea! You're… you're only wearing a bra!"

"So what?" I snapped out as I pulled on a tank top. "You've seen me in a bikini after I grew girly bits, this is no different… but fine… be a little… whatever… I have a shirt on now. You can open your eyes without them bleeding or whatever."

I laughed when he cracked one eye open to check if I was telling the truth or not. When he had confirmation that I was in fact clothed, he opened his other eye asking, "What's the problem, Sis?"

"This stupid cast is too big to fit through any of my long-sleeved shirts. Plus, it isn't warm enough to go outside in just a t-shirt, so now I'm sort of screwed."

"Ah… okay… I think I have a solution for that. Is there anything else causing you issues?"

I nodded as I sat down on the bed. I picked up the toque he had loaned me and kept my eyes on my fingers picking at a loose thread as I answered, "I really appreciate you loaning me this, but… I can't wear it."

"Why not?"

He sat down beside me and placed a hand over mine to still it. When I turned my eyes up to his face, he quietly asked, "What's wrong with it?""

"It keeps getting caught on my staples and that makes it tug them. It… It's kind of giving me a headache."

"Ah… Okay… I think I have a solution for that too. Get dressed and I'll be back in a minute."

After he left the room, I changed into a plain black t-shirt. I then pulled on a pair of black Doc Marten boots and sat on the bed to wait for him. I double checked the know on my sling before I slipped it over my head and placed my casted arm into it. I only wore it when I was out of the house because it was the easiest way for me to make sure no one accidentally bumped into me or I didn't knock it on something.

Opie came in without knocking and smiled when he noticed that I was pretty much ready to go. He held up a plain black baseball cap with a Velcro opening at the back saying, "This should be more comfortable."

"Thanks. It should do the trick." I stood up and turned my back to him. "Can you help me fit it properly?"

"Of course." He undid the Velcro and placed the cap on my head. He played with the sizing until he thought it would be comfortable. "How does that feel?"

"SO much better. Thanks."

"No problem. And this should be more comfortable too," he offered as he helped me pull on one of his black, zip up hoodies. Once he had it on my shoulders, he turned me around so that he could zip it up properly. The last thing he did was tuck the left sleeve into the left pocket of the hoodie after the pulled the hood over my hat. "Alright…? How's that?"

"Much, much better. Thanks again, Bro."

"Anytime, Sis. Okay… I guess all that's left to do is drive to the cemetery," Opie stated in a non-committal voice.

I walked over to the dresser and picked up my silver Aviator style sunglasses and put them on. When I turned around to answer Opie, he suddenly started laughing. I quickly took the sunglasses off and put them back where I found them.

While I glared at him, I said, "Well, I guess that answers my question."

"What question?" He asked in a much more subdued tone.

"Whether or not I looked like the Unabomber."

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Opie and I made it to the cemetery before everyone else. Mary was going to bring Ellie and Kenny here in about half an hour for the formal service. The MC was supposed to arrive around the same time too. Opie wanted to give us some time alone to say goodbye… together.

I don't go to the cemetery often. There's just something about seeing a loved one's name and the short years of their life that makes it so… final. It always hit me harder to look at a headstone than a funeral or memorial service. As soon as I read the words "Piermont 'Piney' WINSTON" I broke down into uncontrollable sobs. Thankfully Opie was there to keep me from falling over. He lifted me off my feet and carried me over to our father's tombstone where he went to his knees to sit down with me in his lap.

I traced the letters of our dad's name with my right hand as I asked, "You know what the last thing I said to Dad was?"

Opie rested his chin on my left shoulder answering, "Whatever it was, Drea, he knew you loved him."

"That's exactly it. I teased him about kicking his ass at Rummy and then he tucked me into bed. The last thing we said to me was that he loved me and I said the same. What…? What if we were still fighting when this happened?"

He hugged his arms more tightly around my torso. "Don't do that, Drea. You can't let yourself fall into the pit of 'what ifs'. You love him and he knew that at the end. That's all that matters."

"But… What if…? If I…? …I hadn't gotten so drunk? What If I hadn't brought up all that Scotch and tequila? Maybe… I… Maybe I could have done something to stop Clay."

"Or maybe he would have shot you with the shotgun instead of just hitting you over the head with it."

"Opie…"

"I'm serious, Drea," he said over my words of protest. "The more likely outcome would be that I would be burying you too. This isn't your fault. The only person to blame for us being here is Clay. This is his fault and his alone."

I tried to tell him I agreed with him, but my sobs stole my ability to speak. Opie shifted his hold on me so the he could lower himself down onto the ground and sit me more comfortably in his lap. I don't know if he wanted to cry or not, but I felt like I was shedding tears for the both of us.

After what felt like forever, my sobs finally started to subside. Opie had filled his pockets with tissues, so he pulled a couple out and passed them to me. I dried off my cheeks with one and blew my nose. I had to use the second one to so the same thing. I must have looked gross right now. Thankfully, it was etched into Opie's DNA that he HAD to love me, no matter what, so I actually didn't feel that self-conscious about how horrible I must look.

"I love you, Opie," I finally whispered as I turned to wrap my right arm around his neck.

He gave me a tight squeeze saying, "I love you too, Drea."

That's when I heard the familiar rumble of motorcycle engines approaching. Guess that meant the MC was here. Shit, that also meant that I had been sitting here crying for nearly half an hour. God, I seriously had to look like such a mess right now.

"I can't…" I heard myself stutter out. "I'm not ready to… to…"

"Hey, it's okay, Drea. Did you want me to take you back to the truck?"

I shook my head answering, "No, it's okay. I kind of… I'd like… I mean… There's Donna and… and David's buried here too, right?"

"Yeah. Actually, he's pretty close to Donna… Did…? Did you…?"

I stood up and placed my hand on his cheek. When he fell silent, I kissed his forehead then said, "I remember where she is. I'm sorry I can't… I mean… I'm sorry I'm leaving you alone…"

"It's fine, Sis. You know where to find me if you need me."

"That I do. Thanks. Love you."

"You too."

He then stood up to hug me one last time. Before he released me from his embrace, he pulled my hood up and rested it on top of my ball cap. He then passed me a stash of folded up tissues with a sad smile on his face. His thoughtfulness choked me up, so all I could do was smile to say, 'Thank you'.

I saw the guys ride into the cemetery, so I turned to make my way towards Donna's grave. I think the last time I was here was when I first got back from the UK. Ellie had gone missing, so Opie, Mary and I scattered around Charming and its surrounding area to try to find her. I couldn't see her until I got to Donna's grave site. She was curled up in a ball with her back pressed against her mother's headstone. I couldn't hear her crying, but the movement of her shoulders told me that's exactly what she was doing.

She jumped when she felt me wrap an arm around her after I had sat down on the ground beside her. When she saw that it was me, she threw her arms around me and buried her face into my chest as she continued to cry.

We ended up talking for a couple of hours while we sat facing her mother's tombstone. I had texted Mary and Opie to let them know I had found her and would make sure to get some dinner into her before I took her home. Opie decided to do the same with Kenny, so that meant only Mary was at the house when I dropped Ellie off at Opie's house. After that, Ellie and I spoke on the pone or met for a soda after school on a daily basis because getting a call saying that she was missing almost gave me a heart attack. She was having a hard time processing everything and really, who could blame her for that? She couldn't talk to Mary or Opie about her feelings for some reason, but I had almost no issues getting her to open up to me, so I made sure she knew I was available, anytime.

Man… Right now, that felt like a lifetime ago.

I knelt down in front of the headstone and pressed my right palm against her name and closed my eyes for a couple of breaths. When I felt a tear roll down my right cheek, I opened my eyes and sat, cross legged on the ground facing the ground.

"I'm sorry I haven't visited much," I quietly said out loud. "But… well… No bullshit, I hate this place. I hate that you were stolen from us and… well… I fucking miss you." I paused to dry my cheeks and compose myself a bit. "The kids are good. Ellie, she… she's amazing… and looks more like you every day. Kenny… well… He's a bit of a shit. But it's more like he's a little brother, not that he's actually getting into or causing a lot of real trouble. He's… He actually reminds me of Opie sometimes. But they really are good kids. They miss you too."

And that's when a fresh onslaught of tears hit me. I really hate crying, which is the biggest reason why I hadn't come here. Every time I saw her name carved into the smooth black granite it was like a punch in the gut. It was a reminder of how she was taken away from us, of how tumultuous my relationship with my Dad had become and of how hard it was for all of us to rebuild ourselves so that we could help each other come to terms with our new reality. Sometimes I felt like such a fraud because I don't think I've truly ever felt like myself ever since I heard the new that Donna had been shot.

Well… there were a couple of times, but… Even that glimmer of hope had been taken away from me.

Once I had my tears under control, I pressed my palm to her name as I solemnly vowed, "I will protect them with my last breath. I promise Ellie and Kenny will NEVER be without me to support them. I love you Donna and I really do hope you're watching over all of us."

I then forced myself to stand up and start wandering through the rows of headstones. Opie had said that David was buried close to here. I had to have visited his grave, right? There's no way that in nearly two years that I wouldn't have visited him, right? It seemed inconceivable but as I wandered the graveyard, none of this felt familiar. I didn't recognize any of these names or grave sites, except for Donna's.

That was until I saw it. Down at the end of the row I had just turned into, there was a gray head stone with a small American flag attached to one side of it. I didn't have to get any closer to it to know that there would be a California State flag on the other of it. Jacob had insisted on it, along with the carved copy of David's badge on the front of the headstone beneath David's name and lifespan. The badge I totally agreed with, but I thought the flags were a little over the top because I wasn't convinced Jacob would be diligent about their upkeep. I'm not going to lie; I felt a wave of relief wash over me when I noticed that so far, the elder Hale hadn't let us down. Maybe he wasn't completely self-absorbed.

I said NOT completely!

Once I saw the name I had been seeking, I smiled sadly then quietly said, "Hey Baby Blue… Long time…"

Unlike Donna, I didn't really know what to say in this moment. So… I opted for silence. It wasn't often that I was afforded a moment of peace because every part of my life was loud and busy. Okay… Sometimes at the restaurant I could hide in my office, but that didn't usually last all that long. Just like when I was hanging out at TM, someone usually sought me out for some reason. Some days it was just to chat, but more often than not, it was to have me put out some kind of fire.

As I stood there staring down at David's grave, I noticed movement out of the corner of my eye. Given my breakdowns at Dad's and Donna's graves and how long it took me to find David's, it shouldn't have surprised me that I looked like Dad's service was winding up.

"Shit," I cursed out softly to myself before I knelt down in front of David's headstone. I used my right hand to keep myself steady as I leaned in to press a kiss to David's first name. "I miss you, Baby Blue."

As I made my way back to Dad's grave, I noticed a couple of people lingering by Opie's side. One of them was Jax and given how close we were that made perfect sense. But the other guy standing with them wasn't someone I immediately recognized. Why would he be standing with my brothers when everyone else from the club had started walking towards their bikes?

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Jax stopped mid-sentence and his back went ramrod straight when he noticed the hood figure walking towards them. Before he could voice his question, Opie turned to follow his best friend's gaze. At first Opie wasn't going to say anything, but then he noticed both Jax and Happy slowly moving their hands towards their side arms.

"HEY! It's fine! That's just Drea."

"THAT'S Andie?" Jax questioned in a disbelieving tone. "Where the hell has she been? Why wasn't she at the service?"

"She…" Opie hesitated while he tried to decide what truth to tell. "She had a pretty bad accident and had to stay in the hospital because of it. Her memory had been really messed up and she said that she wasn't ready to face everyone."

"Her memory?" Happy asked with his eyes laser focused on Andie as she continued to make her slow approach.

Opie nodded then answered, "When she first woke up, she didn't remember that Hale was dead, let alone how it happened. Ash those memories are coming back to her, she's been really overwhelmed."

"Shit. That fucking sucks," Jax commented in a quiet voice.

Happy didn't say anything before he took a couple of steps towards Andie. Opie quickly moved in front of him and stopped him with a hand on his chest. That was the first time Happy's eyes moved away from watching Andie. Opie almost backed off when he saw the angry look in Happy's eyes, but he forced himself to stand his ground. He owed Andie that much.

"Happy, look… I… I don't know a polite way to say this but she… Andie doesn't remember you… or that you two are in a relationship. Her doctor said it was best to let her allow everything to come back at her own pace. Please, don't be upset with her? She isn't ready to be around the club… At least, not yet."

Happy's eyes moved from Opie's face to Andie's approaching form a couple of times but he didn't say anything. Opie and Jax noticed a tick on his jaw that looked like he was gritting his teeth, but he didn't reply. At least not with words. Instead, he just nodded then turned and left.

Jax nodded towards Andie asking, "Is there anything I can do to help?"

"No," Opie almost snapped out. He paused there and forced himself to calm down before he continued, "Not right now. We're just taking everything one day at a time. Stuff is slowly coming back to her and shit like Hale's death have hit her hard. It's almost like she's grieving his death for the first time all over again, so it's… it's been hard for her… us… just like last time."

"I get that. But if there's anything you need, Ope, just me know, okay?"

Opie managed to not to roll his eyes when he answered, "Yeah, of course."

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I watched as Opie stopped the Nomad from approaching me and froze mid-step for a moment. Why was he coming towards me? I know Dad had trusted him to take care of me after David was killed, but he was a Nomad. He didn't have a home here, so why was he stalking towards me? Why was…?

By this time, I had made it to Opie's side and he immediately pulled me into a tight hug. While he kept my head pressed against his chest, I asked, "What the hell did the Nomad want?"

"He has a name, Drea," Opie countered with a chuckle.

I nuzzled my face against his chest as I replied, "So… What? That still doesn't answer my question."

He squeezed his arms around me replying, "I guess it doesn't… Well it… Ugh… I can't tell you without possibly delaying your road to recovery."

THAT got my attention. I pushed back against his chest with my right hand to give him a questioning look. Opie smiled as he caught my hand and added, "All in good time, Sis. All in good time, I promise."