But No One Did

It's amazing how normal life can feel after someone dies, how normal it feels not to see or talk to someone every day. Ever so often I would dial Opie's number and the fact that he couldn't pick up the other line wouldn't hit me until I heard his voice came through the speakers during his voicemail greeting. We talked every single day when he was alive (except for his stint in Stockton. Even then he would call whenever he could and if I wasn't available he would leave me messages to let me know he was alive and doing relatively well), so it was natural for me to dial his number without thing about it at random hours of the day.

But now that's changed. Now when I heard his voice it was just a horrific reminder of what had happened and it was like a punch to the gut every time. Seriously, just when I thought I would be able to go a day without breaking down into ugly, choking sobs, I would unconsciously dial his number and I would be right back at square one again.

Because of that, I had convinced Happy that I was better off staying at home. I got distracted too easily and my headaches became too debilitating for me to be helpful at the garage. The clubhouse was no longer a safe haven because all I saw when I thought of going there was my twin's lifeless body laying in the chapel. I actually had a panic attack thinking about going in with Happy to spend the day at the clubhouse while he dealt with club business. After that I had tried to explain my re-opening wound logic to him using the phone calls as an example along with the clubhouse. Since he had seen firsthand how hard it had been for me to spend time at my apartment after David was killed, it didn't take long for him to understand the soundness of my logic.

That's how I found myself sitting in my garden, trying to decide what changes I wanted to make to it. When I had first started planting seeds and plants, it had been pretty haphazard. Rita had mad suggestions of what would be best to grow in our climate and I was eager to try them all. Now I knew what thrived and what I could tend to the easiest, I wanted to take the time to organize it all properly.

Plus, I needed a project. Normally I would throw myself into my work, but that didn't go over so well now. The garage was a no go because of I the previously listed reasons. My restaurant… well, I got mixed receptions there. If I went in without wearing a wig, everyone wanted to play twenty questions about my injuries. That's if they didn't feel so uncomfortable that they avoided eye contact. If I wore my wig, people seemed to be more unnerved for some reason. A couple of days after the wake, I tried going in to check on the restaurant and bar and finally had to bail when the fifth table of diners started questioning me about Opie's death and how it happened. I kept trying to give the line that it was "an incident" at the county jail, but that was too vague for their liking. I then tried to hide at the bar, but customers who had enjoyed more than a couple alcoholic beverages were even more inquisitive (and pushy) than the patrons in the restaurant.

That's when I finally went to my office. But there was no work for me to do there. Cody had graciously taken over the day to day operations while I was in the hospital so everything was up to date. We had a brief meeting just to touch base about everything (mostly so I could pretend I was still an active participant at my businesses) and then I finally called it a day.

After that, I realized I had less breakdowns if I stayed out of the public eye. So, staying at home to garden became the activity of choice for me. I took my phone out into the yard with me so I could listen to music and completely "Zen out" while I worked. Or the off chance I was needed for anything I would hear it ring.

"Hey, Princess. Can I help you with anything?" Happy asked as he sat down on the back stairs beside me.

I shook my head before I rested it on his shoulder answering, "Still in the planning stages." I sat back so I could see his face and leaned in to kiss him. "Not that I'm complaining, but I wasn't expecting you home so soon. Or… Wait! Did I space out so bad that I didn't hear you drive up? Because I don't remember hearing your bike."

"No, you didn't," he replied with a soft snarl. I sat back to give him a questioning look that actually caused him to soften his expression. "Sorry… Didn't mean to scar you, Princess."

"It's not that, Grumpy. It's just that now I'm beyond curious to hear what happened."

"I'll start with the good news," he stated as he took my hand in his to kiss the back of it a few times. "We're partnering with Nero to go into the 'companion business'."

I snatched my hand back with a disgusted look on my face. "How is that good news?"

He gave me a patient look as he reclaimed my hand but this time, he just held it. "It's a legitimate business venture that can help us to move away from our other partnerships."

"Move away…? Wait! Does that mean no more guns and drugs?"

"Not yet. But it's getting us on the right track."

I leaned in to place a soft kiss on his lips. "I'm sorry. You're right, that is extremely good news. Alright, please tell me the bad news isn't THAT bad."

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Not everyone is excited about our shift in focus."

"Shit. Who…?" Then a thought dawned on me. "Clay… He's the one pushing to stick with what you know, right?"

That seemed to surprise him. I hate that I did it, but I laughed at the look on his face. To apologize for that faux pas, I kissed him again. "Grumpy, don't look so shocked. From what Opie told me, getting out of coke smuggling is part of the reason Clay shot Dad and knocked me out."

"Opie told you that?"

I bit my lip as tears welled up in my eyes. "We… He didn't have a lot of secrets from me. Especially if it could hurt our family. After Donna, he became more open about club business. He was worried about… well something bad happening… just like it did."

Happy leaned forward to hug me sighing out, "Princess…"

"Don't," I interrupted. "I know why you're worried about me knowing too much. It's okay if you don't want to tell me as much as he did."

"It's not that. I'm sorry that talking about this has brought tears to your eyes."

"Oh that," I tried to reply dismissively as I let him pull me into another hug. "Nothing for you to apologize for. I still tear up when I think about Donna sometimes, so I'm sure the same thing will happen with Dad and Opie for a while. Sorry."

"It's fine."

We then shifted in our seats until I was sitting in his lap. This was the best part about being with him, we could just sit and snuggle in silence without it feeling strained or uncomfortable. It was rare that I sought the solitude of silence, but for now it felt like the right course of action.

After a few minutes of silence, I whispered, "Who else isn't thrilled about the club's new focus."

"What?" Happy asked sounding more like he hadn't heard me over him not understanding the question.

I sat back so I could make eye contact and said in a clearer voice, "You seemed surprised that Clay was an option, so…? Who else is trying to derail the club's plans?"

"I wouldn't say 'derail', but Galen isn't too thrilled about our new leadership or the changes he wants to make."

"He's not? Did he say that or how can you tell?"

"He and Jax duked it out before he shot up our bikes."

I stared at him for a couple of seconds trying to let that information sink in. He had said it in such a nonchalant tone that the severity of the situation didn't quite register. As his words finally penetrated through the fog, I felt my eyes go comically wide. Before I could start to panic, Happy placed a hand on each of my cheeks to force me to look him in the eye.

"We're all fine, Princess. Jax is a little banged up from the fist fight, but none of us got hurt."

"But your bikes are…?"

"Scrap metal."

"Fuck. All because Jax is President and wants to get out of scary smuggling?"

"More or less."

I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly saying, "I'm glad you guys walked away from the meeting today."

"Me too."

"So…?" I made myself comfortable again with my head on his shoulder. "If you got dropped off here, does that mean…?"

"I was thinking we could have chicken tenders and fries for dinner."

I sat back to check if he was joking or not… because it would be REALLY cruel if he was… He gave me an expectant look that told me he was being completely earnest. Thank God! That meant he finally got the night off from club duties. And it was all because Galen had a hissy fit and shot up their bikes. Wow, I could just… EW! NO! Galen could go sit on some rusty nails. There would be NO thanking him.

But Happy? I could just kiss him, so I did. And he accepted it willingly. While we were still attached at the lips, Happy somehow managed to shift his hold on me so that he could stand up and carry me into the house. I let out a small, surprised squeak into his mouth at how easily he was able to execute that maneuver and then I wrapped my arms around his neck to try to help make it easier for him to carry me. Not that he needed it in anyway.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Our room was still pitch black when I opened my eyes. That made me wonder what had woken me up if it was still the middle o f the night. I wondered, but not all that much. I quickly rolled over to cuddle into Happy's side, but he wasn't there and the reason that I was aroused out of my slumber suddenly became crystal clear.

"Yeah, I'll head out right away," he replied quietly into his phone. "Of course… yes… yes… I'll take care of it."

I couldn't hear any part of the other side of the conversation, so I sat up on the bed while I watched Happy pace. Shit. I should have known better than to think that we would actually get a night off. The universe wouldn't allow us that much of a reprieve.

He continued to pace while he listened to whomever was on the other side of the line. He would nod his head and hum out a nose of affirmation every once in a while, looking like he was making a mental list. That's the only reason I didn't call out to him to let him know I was awake. I didn't want to ruin his concentration.

When he was finished talking on the phone, he snapped it closed and then just stood there with his back facing the bed. I guess he hadn't noticed that I was sitting up. Or maybe he had and he was trying to figure out a way to break the news to me that I would be spending the rest of the night alone.

My poor Grumpy, I thought as I sat up even straighter with my back against the headboard. "Since your bike got shot up, you're welcome to borrow mine. I know it's kind of girly looking but it'll get you to where you need to be."

He jumped ever so slightly at the sound of my voice. When he turned around, he did it in a very slow, deliberate movement. I'm sure he was expecting me to be angry and have a look on my face that matched that emotion and not my tone or what I had just said. And knowing him he was probably planning out what to say to quell my anger and try to appease me.

I reached over to turn on the bedside lamp so that he could see that my facial expressions matched my tone and offer. His whole demeanor seemed to relax when he saw me and it was all I could do not to laugh. Even though he visibly relaxed, he still seemed apprehensive about approaching me, so I crawled across the bed to his side. As he turned to face me, I raised up onto my knees to lessen our height difference.

"Come here, Grumpy," I playfully commanded as I beckoned him closer to the bed. He took a couple of steps forward which allowed me to pull him into a hug and give him a soft kiss. "Although I hate waking up alone, I understand why you have t go. And why you can't tell me about it."

He ran the palms of both of his hands over each side of my head, just like he used to when he was trying to tame my hair when I had the worst case of bedhead. I wanted to ask him what he was thinking, but I swallowed that question and forced myself to wait patiently. He must have noticed the effort I used because I was rewarded with a deep kiss that nearly took my breath away.

While I was swooning, he hugged out a laugh then replied, "Thanks for the offer but the Prospects should have dropped off my replacement bike by now. Plus, you might need to ride it."

"Ride…? What? Why?"

He used the index and middle fingers of his right hand to try to smooth out my now furrowed brow. "I have to go meet Jax but you might want to head to the hospital." He quickly moved his hand down to my mouth to keep me from speaking the new thoughts that had popped into my head. "There was another home invasion… at the Roosevelts. I know you've become friendly with Rita and Eli, so I volunteered you to check in with them."

"Home…? Who got hurt?"

"Rita. She tried to fight the three men off and was shot."

"SHOT!? Do you know how badly hurt he is?"

He shook his head and kissed my forehead to try to calm me down. "No, that's why I was hoping you could check on her."

"Alright. I mean… Yes, of course I will. Shit. Unser, no Rita… those assholes have some balls."

"That's one way to describe it. So, you'll go to the hospital while I go meet with Jax."

I frowned at that comment replying, "That's about it, but… why do you have to have a meeting in the middle of the night."

"It isn't the middle of the night, Princess. The black out curtains are just doing their job."

I felt my cheeks heat up under an embarrassed blush as I said, "Oh."

He kissed me then hugged me against his naked chest. "Why don't you shower while I make us something quick to eat."

Before he could step away, I trapped him in a circle of my arms. He let out a soft noise of aggravation so I kissed him until I felt him relax in my arms. "I wish you were coming with me to wash my back."

"Andie…" He started in a warning tone.

"Hey! I know why you can't… I just wanted you to know I appreciate you…" I reached down to cup his naked butt cheeks and gave them a squeeze. "Every… last… inch… of you."

"Andie…" He whispered as he leaned in to kiss me.

Now that was more like it. I moved my hands up his back and hooked them under his armpits with a hand on each shoulder. As I opened my legs to encircle his waist, he moved his hands to my knees and pressed them down on the mattress to keep them closed.

"Andie… We can't…"

I almost started to pout at him, but the look on his face told me that he was not in a humorous mood. I immediately dropped my hands from his shoulders and held them up in a show of surrender. He remained close to the bed and actually moved in to place a soft, grateful kiss on my lips.

"You go shower," he ordered softly against my lips.

He then moved away from the bed to his dresser. I watched as he pulled out some clothes to put on. Now I could feel myself pouting, so I forced myself to move off the bed. I ended up beside Happy so that I could follow his lead and retrieve my own clothes. While we both pulled open drawers, I could tell he was pointedly not looking over at me. I guess I couldn't blame him because standing next to him, completely naked, prove to be a bit of a struggle for me not to entice him back into bed.

I turned to make a smartass comment, but he swiftly took a large step away from me. Oaky that was… not usual.

"Andie… Please…?"

I gelt myself scowl in confusion as I asked, "What? I wasn't doing anything. I swear."

"I know it isn't intentional… But you standing so close is…."

He trailed off there but I was able to piece together what he was trying to say. How could I not since it was almost exactly what I had been thinking too? But if he was having that hard of a time not giving into temptation then maybe… I should hurry the fuck up and get into the damned shower.

I abandoned the thought of finding an outfit. Instead, I practically ran t the bedroom door and pulled my robe off the hook on the back of it. As I slipped through the door, I could hear Happy laughing quietly to himself… Too bad it wasn't one of those days where that was a good omen.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I stopped by my restaurant on my way to the hospital. When I got behind the wheel of my Yukon, a brilliant thought came to me, picking up food for Eli. I knew how horrible cafeteria food at the hospital could be, plus if he was anything like me, he would be so focused on Rita that he would forget to take care of himself. Another bonus was that he would be less likely to dismiss me when he saw that I came bearing gifts.

When I found him, he was in a small waiting area for friends and family. I was all too familiar with it, but the last couple of times I had sat there I had the guys with me. Alright, more importantly, I had OPIE at my side.

DON'T! I mentally scolded myself. Don't think about that now. Focus on Eli and Rita. No one but Eli and Rita exist right now.

I continued my approach as I silently coached myself to keep my thoughts on the task at hand. Eli didn't notice me at all so I slipped onto a chair to his right and quietly asked, "Have you eaten since you got here, Eli?"

He kept his face in his hands as he shook his head. Since he had made no moves to sit up straighter or to look at me, I figured that was the only response I was going to get. Not that it bothered me at all. I know I wouldn't be very social if roles were reversed.

Not that I let that deter me at all. "You should eat something to help you keep…"

"Look…" He interrupted in a stern, don't even try to fight with me, tone. "I'm not going down to the cafeteria. Not until I hear something other than she's in surgery from the doctors."

"I get that," I replied meekly. He finally raised his head to look at me, probably to yell at me a bit more. But for some reason he remained silent. I raised one of the bags of food I was carrying in one hand and a drink carrier in the other explaining, "That's why I stopped by my restaurant to pick something up for you. I wasn't sure what you'd be hungry for, so I brought you some choices."

Eli stared at me for a few silent breaths. I could tell when the two other bags of food hit his eye-line because his eyes widened slightly. He started to smile softly as he shook his head then said, "Andie, that's… very sweet. But you didn't have to do that."

"I know, but… well… I also know there's nothing I can say that will ease your pain, so I figured I'd at least keep you fed. And I promise there's more than just doughnuts in here."

I forced him to take the first bag and he reluctantly looked inside it. I then continued saying, "The coffee here is actually pretty decent, so this is orange and apple juice and an iced tea."

"Andie… This is… Thank you for your thoughtfulness."

"You're welcome. So? Have they given you any updates?"

He nodded and suddenly his blood shot eyes turned from sad to devastated. "She's still in surgery, but they aren't hopeful that our baby will survive."

"Babe…? Oh, good Lord, Eli, I had no idea that you two… I'm so sorry." I paused as I felt my cheeks heat up. Isn't that exactly what I hated hearing people say? Yeah, but it didn't make it any less true for this situation. "I really am even though I know everyone is saying shit like that to you. Is…? Can I do anything for you?"

He pulled out one of the muffins from the bag as he shook his head. "There really isn't anything any of us can do. But this… This I do appreciate."

"Okay… and you're welcome." I stood up and stared down at him. I really wanted to give him a hug but I wasn't sure if it would be well received. Instead, I placed a comforting hand on his shoulder and said, "If there's anything you need or anything I can do, please don't hesitate to call. My staff knows that any orders you call in are to go on my tab. The menu is in one of the bags, just call and they'll deliver it wherever you are."

"Andie that's…"

"The least I can do," I interrupted. "I meant it; you need to keep up your strength."

"Thanks." He stared down at the muffin and picked at the paper cup absentmindedly. I guess that mean I had lost him to his thoughts. I started to back away but stopped when I heard him call out, "Wait! There is something you can do."

I perked up slightly saying, "Name it."

He turned his face up so that he could stare me down. Gone was the sadness and devastation, now all I could see was anger and rage. I knew it wasn't directly at me necessarily, but the circumstances that put that look in Eli's eyes made me sick to my stomach. It was bringing up all of the emotions I felt when Donna and David were murdered. Senseless acts of violence that hurt innocent people who cause no undo harm in the world. Eli and Rita really didn't' deserve this at all.

"you give your president a warning. I'm going to find whoever did this to my wife and unborn child. And when I do, there WILL be hell to pay. The damage I did to the clubhouse when I first moved here will be like an amusement park ride compared to the pain that will rain on the club if I find out they had anything to do with this."

"Eli…"

"No, Andie. You said you would do anything, so that's what I want you to do."

"And I will, I swear. But what I was going to say is that I don't think SAMCRO has anything to do with this…" I held up my hand to keep him from interrupting me again. "BUT if they did and I find out Jax and Happy have been lying to me, I'll be right at your side while you take them down. I promise you that."