During supper Remus received a note from Professor McGonagall. Please report to the trophy room at 6pm exactly this Sunday evening (17th) for your detention.
"Detention?" Lily, sitting next to him, had noticed the slip of paper. "What did you do?"
Remus was torn between looking contrite and looking amused. "Hex Black."
"Good for you!"
Remus just nodded and began putting food on his plate. "He's n-not all that bad, and they did rescue us this morning."
Lily's nose crinkled up. "I guess..."
After curfew, Remus went to his dorm to spend some time alone-or try to. Almost immediately Black followed him, trying to get him to join them in a game of exploding snaps which Remus turned down. Black stood there looking like he was going to say something else, but then just mumbled an 'all right' and left. Remus returned to his book, not really paying attention to the words. What do I do about them? he wondered, idly flipping through the pages. He really missed hanging out with them, more than he'd like to admit. However being friends with them was very different than being friends with Lily.
Lily's not sharing my dorm, she's not with me as much as they would be. They'd see me more. There's more likely a chance of something happening, of me slipping up, of them seeing that humanity is merely a mask...
He bit down on his lower lip so hard he drew blood. The familiar taste oozed into his mouth and he just ran his tongue over the wound until it healed up, and the last bit of blood was swallowed. It was probably gross but by this point in his life he was very used to ingesting his own blood.
He leaned his head back against the headboard and stared at the curtains hanging down the end of his bed. He closed the book and ran his fingernail along the cover. I enjoyed spending time with them. I did. I want to. What do I do?
He was still staring at the curtains when Black and Potter came in a good half an hour later. Remus jerked out of his spaciness and quickly went back to his book, ignoring the looks Black was giving him.
()
On Sunday evening Remus showed up at the trophy room at five till six and had to wait miserably with Filch leering at him since apparently Remus was going to be serving the detention with someone else, as per McGonagall's orders... until Black finally sauntered in at five after. Oh great, of course, of course it's with him, Remus thought, gritting his teeth. He had the feeling this was gonna be a more difficult detention than the one with Hagrid had been.
"You're late," Filch growled.
"Am I?" Black pretended to look shocked. "I must invest in a watch!"
Filch sneered and shoved buckets into both their hands. "You'll be cleaning off as many as the trophies as you can until you're told otherwise... hopefully you'll be forgotten... hehehehe..." He lurched off, cackling to himself at the thought of them cleaning all through the night.
Black put his thumb on his nose and waggled his fingers at the retreating caretaker then sighed rather dramatically. "I suppose we better start, eh? Should have smuggled a radio in. So, what are you in for?"
"Hexing you."
Black nearly dropped the bucket he was carrying. "But I told Pomfrey and McGonagall both that Slytherins did it... I swear I did! Someone else must have seen it happen, then. Maybe Farrow was peeking out of the library."
"No, I-I went to McGonagall and t-told her," Remus said, glancing around the room. He intended to start on the opposite side of the room as Black however Black just followed him and began cleaning off the trophy next to the one Remus started with. "What d-did you do?"
"We were caught in the girls' bathroom on the fifth floor," Black answered and Remus's jaw dropped. Black laughed. "We were replacing the soap with frog spawn soap, or trying to. As I said, we got caught. Peter's a rotten lookout. James has got his detention later in the week. Guess ol' McGonagall thought I'd do better with you, huh?" He grinned at Remus who didn't reply. "I wonder what these people did to get their name engraved on metal," Black pondered as he half-heartedly scrubbed. "Imagine, living your whole life and you end up a name on a trophy."
"That one th-there ended up being a Minister of Magic so I'd s-say she did more than j-just end up a name on a trophy," Remus said, glancing over.
Black looked down at the name then made a face. "Did she? Huh." He set it down, half of it still dirty, and picked up another. "I intend to be known for more than just whatever this lot did. I'm going to be famous one day."
"For what? Being annoying?"
Black snorted. "Not for being Head Boy, that's for sure." He studied the shield and then propped it back up, only the name cleaned off.
"You have to c-clean the entire thing, not just the name."
Black stuck his tongue out then picked it back up. "If my name is anywhere on here, it'd be Quidditch. If I join. You like Quidditch?"
"N... not really..."
"How can you not like Quidditch? It's brilliant. James is definitely going to be on the team. He's definitely going to be on some of these awards for Incredibly Talented Quidditch Players." He finished polishing the shield properly and picked up another. "I bet you'll be on here too somewhere. Award for Geniusness or something." Remus tried not to smile at that, and finally finished the trophy he had picked up. He carefully set it down, making sure it was prominently displayed, then went on to another. "I wonder if there's an award for being Astonishingly Good-Looking, I'd get that one. You know, you need to be our friend. It just makes sense, doesn't it? James will be the Quidditch player, I'll be the Heart Breaker... we need a Nerd on the team."
"And Pettigrew?"
"He's the nice one," Black said in a 'duh' voice.
"And what team is this, exactly?"
Black shrugged. "The Quartet of... ummm... Cool...ness..."
Remus couldn't bother hiding his laughter at that. "That is a dumb name."
"You come up with a better one, then," Black said rather hopefully, moving on to yet another trophy, all of his hardly cleaned at all. But Remus just shook his head. "Anyway, you promised to help us out with the bat-bogey hex, didn't you? Plus that sneezing one you put on me was jolly good. You have to teach us."
"How c-come you lied about it?"
"Huh? Oh, that, well... I wasn't gonna turn you in, and figured maybe I could get some Slytherins into trouble."
"But why didn't you turn me in?"
"Friends don't do that."
Remus slapped the trophy down, the noise echoing off the walls. "We're not friends!"
Black just smiled at him. "We could be."
Remus's chest seized, like Black had reached right in and grabbed hold of his heart with his bare fingers. I wish it were that simple. He did, he wanted it to be so bad, and only just now realized. After a week of being bugged by Black, it was just that simple statement that hurt Remus and made him question everything. His thoughts from the previous night came flooding back.
"Why? Why do you want to be friends with me so bad?" he whispered, picking up another trophy and rubbing rather furiously at the name.
Black's smile turned to a frown and Remus expected him to make a joke or something, but Black just shrugged. "I don't know. I just do. I think you're... neat. Look, as soon as I met James... it was like... urf... like um..." He scrunched his face up in thought. "Like um, like we were meant to be together. Like, uhhh, instant connection! And I felt the same about you, too."
"So what, I'm your... destiny?" Remus asked incredulously.
Black began laughing. "Merlin you make it sound so weird and dramatic! I'm just meaning that I felt this sort of connection with you, same as I did James. I knew I wanted him to be my friend and I know I want you to be my friend. And if there is one thing I've learned is that even though I usually don't listen to my gut instincts, I should. And this time I am. Or trying to. Does... that make sense?"
Remus ducked his head again, not wanting to answer. Yes. It was a perfect description of how he felt about-Lily. And, unfortunately, Black. He wanted to be their friends (and Potter and Pettigrew, even if Potter thought he was mental) even if he knew it was wrong. Was this what Black felt? Without the it-being-wrong part.
It's a bigger risk than Lily.
"You know, if you hang out with us and stuff, you don't have to talk. If you don't want to."
He kept rubbing at the name on the trophy, feeling Black just watching him. I don't know what to do... He wished he had someone to talk to but-but there was nobody. In the school. In the world. The loneliness felt crushing, pressing in on all sides, suffocating him. I have nobody... because nobody can know... But instead of that making him more adamant about saying no... it pulled at something inside of him. It sort of felt like the whole werewolf thing was inside a bubble, deep within him. He knew it wasn't. He knew any second the wolf could emerge and destroy everything... but he realized if it did, it wouldn't matter if they were friends or not.
If I do slip up... they'd see regardless...
There's no point in hurting myself even more than I already am... is there?
"I-I suppose I-c-could... give it... a proper try..." he found himself saying and Black grinned so broadly Remus thought it must have hurt.
"Brilliant! On one condition."
"Wait, you're the one making the conditions?!"
"You have to think up a better name than Quartet of Coolness. Please?"
"Oh-fine but I have a condition too."
"Name it."
"You actually polish those trophies instead of swiping the rag and declaring it done."
Black stuck his hand out. "Deal."
Remus looked down and then shook Black's hand. "Deal."
Half an hour later neither boy noticed as Professor McGonagall took a quiet look into the trophy room. She saw the two boys sitting on the floor, talking and laughing as they worked, and she smiled, leaving the room quickly, glad her intuition of throwing the two into detention together had been right.
()
Remus and Black worked on trophies for two and a half hours, though the time went by with all their chattering. McGonagall finally came in and shooed them out of the trophy room, walking with them up to the tower so they wouldn't get in trouble for being out after curfew.
Once inside the common room Black spun around to look at Remus. "Was all that the truth or was it just for the detention?"
Remus stared up into his face. "T... truth," he replied.
"Good. Come on then, I think James and Peter are in the dorm."
They were indeed in the dorm, tossing back and forth a bubble made from Drooble's Best Blowing Gum, trying to pop it. Potter was poking it with the sharp end of the quill while Pettigrew smacked it with a hairbrush. The bubble just drifted back and forth between them.
"...lling you it won't pop," Pettigrew said as Potter jabbed it viciously with his quill. It drifted towards Remus who batted it back towards the other boys. "Heya Sirius, welcome back!"
"Thanks!" Black said, striding in. "Guess what? He's our friend now."
Potter raised his eyebrows, looking back and forth between them. "Wait, what?"
"We had detention together and my irresistible charm won him over."
Remus wanted to say, Is that what you call your constant annoyance? however didn't want it to be taken the wrong way, or upset Black, so he kept the teasing to himself.
"Are you just being illusional again?" Potter asked.
"No! Tell'em, Remus!" Black said.
"D-do you mean delusional?" Remus asked.
Potter coughed, looking rather embarrassed. "Erm, possibly. So, is it true?"
Remus went over to his bed and sat down on the edge, kicking his trainers off. "So it would s-seem. If... you're okay with a nutcase hanging around," he could not help but add.
Now Potter looked even more embarrassed and gave Remus a sheepish grin. "Heh, right, well-uh, sorry. About that. I don't really think you are, you know." Suddenly he jumped up and opened his desk drawer, pulling a chocolate frog out. "Here! Peace offering. Besides, you know, Sirius's a bit mental and I don't mind him."
Black kicked at Potter's ankles, sending him dancing away laughing. "You're the mental one," Black said.
Potter responded to that by hitting Black with a pillow, and Black dove for his bed to get a pillow and whallop back. Remus just opened up the frog, watching as the two smacked each other violently while Pettigrew made a sort of 'eep!' sound and scurried over, jumping onto Remus's bed.
"D... do you want the card?" Remus offered, wishing he could offer the frog too but not wanting to offend Potter. He held onto the frog while it wiggled. It's just a spell, it's not real, I'm not hunting it, he reminded himself as the spell slowly wore off.
"Ooh, thanks!" Pettigrew said happily. "Are you our friend, then? Really?"
"Mmmhmm."
"Good."
"HAH!" Black shouted, triumphantly pumping his fists in the air as he had knocked Potter head-over-heels and was now straddling him, pinning him down. "I win."
"Gerrof me, you great lump!" Potter moaned then wriggled himself free, his glasses askew.
Black beamed from the floor. "So, anyway, now it's the Quartet of Coolness."
"What? No! Merlin, Sirius, I told you to never call it that!" Potter groaned. "First the Dashing Duo, then the Trio of Trickery-but Quartet of Coolness is just pushing it. Not the Quartet part, the name part," he added quickly to Remus.
"I agree," he replied, finally taking a bite of the frog since it had stopped moving.
"Gryffin-dudes," Black said.
"Bloody hell, you suck at coming up with names!" laughed Potter.
"Yeah well, I've tasked Remus with finding us a decent title," Black replied.
Remus, he thought, realizing it was the same thing with Lily. He figured asking them if he should use their first names would result in them laughing at him, and he didn't want that. Sirius. James. Peter. He looked around at them, carefully repeating their names in his head. A few days ago I had no friends, now I have four... though, really, he still felt nervous about the boys simply from the fact he was sharing a dorm with them and having more chances to screw up.
Black-Sirius flopped down onto his bed pulling out a broom catalog, while P-James began chewing up another piece of gum. He blew up a large bubble and flicked it into the air then started working on popping it. The other one was floating somewhere above Spinnet's bed.
"They don't pop," Pett-Peter said adamantly.
"They haven't met me," James replied then got into his potions kit, pulling out his silver knife. Remus involuntarily flinched, thinking wildly they figured it out and James was going to come at him with the knife, but all he did was jab the bubble which remained intact. "Man, okay, c'mon Droobles, this isn't..! HiiiiYAAAA!" James slashed at the bubble, sending it bouncing around wildly. "Drat."
"Told you!" Peter said, smirking now. He unwrapped a piece of gum then offered another piece to Remus who shook his head. He didn't think it'd be safe to have werewolf spit bobbing around the room like that. Peter shrugged and put both pieces in his mouth, blowing a huge bubble nearly twice the size of his own head, a mixture of blue and sorta reddish purple. Peter poked at it and it did float though just barely, hovering near the floor. James gave it a kick, sending it careening off of the end of Struthers's bed and then knocking about near the heater in the center of the room.
"I wonder if hot or cold would make it pop," James said, rubbing his chin. He grabbed at one of the other bubbles and jammed his wand against it. "Verdimillious!" he said and the bubble flew off in a shower of green sparks. Intact. "Okay fine, fine. Maybe they aren't so easily popped..."
"Jimmy, look at this broom," Sirius said, flapping the catalog. "Now, if I got a broom, it'd be this one for sure."
Remus pulled himself back on his bed, listening intently as the three boys began talking and arguing and laughing and joking like they always did, however this time he let it in instead of over him, and it felt pretty good. He laughed at some of the jokes though didn't really join in the conversations. They mostly talked about brooms, and he had zero knowledge about that. Sirius came over and showed him the broom he wanted, and Remus nodded as if that was a good broom but he couldn't tell you the difference between that one and any other broom in the catalog. At least Sirius seemed pleased with Remus's response.
The three went back to talking about brooms and then Sirius realized how quiet Remus was being so he subtly shifted the conversation, leaving an opening for Remus to join in but Remus didn't know what to say. He wasn't really sure how to have proper conversations yet, so he just kept quiet. None of them seemed bothered by this though Sirius tried his best, which Remus appreciated. He just hoped with time he'd be able to figure out how to act and talk and seem like a normal human being and not a-well, lunatic beast.