...a...aaaa...wha...a...Whaaaa...Whaaaaaa... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! ! ! ! ! ! ! !"

"Kakyoin! Kakyoin, calm down!"

Zecora shook Kakyoin, yet he only stopped screaming when she nearly slapped the very red out of his hair.

"I... I'm okay now..."

"Shaking the bed whilst sweating profusely, that is not something to take lightly."

"It was a, terrible dream... But, I can't remember what it was."

"Perhaps for the best, some fears have yet to rest. Come now just down the stairs, in just a few moments, we shall soon be in the air."

She opened a window for Kakyoin to get some light and air, but it was only he who noticed the cut on his hand.

"When did...?"

My Little Pony: Friendship is a Bizarre Adventure

Part 3: ~Stardust Coachriders ~

Episode VIII: Testing Our Trust, Baby

"AAAAAGH! MY DOG!"

Kakyoin looked to the side. A child was crying over a dog, a dog with it's skull cut clean open, and brains falling out.

"I... I remember vaguely. There was a dog but, when?"

"A disgusting crime, but the world is full of evil, our goal is not to clean every bit of grime."

"Y-You're right, Ms. Zecora."

They neared the airplane, yet Joseph was argued with the merchant.

"What're you talking about!? I gave you the money, that means it's mine, that's how it works literally everywhere anywhere!"

"I'm sorry sir but, this baby has an incredibly high fever, and no doctor in town to find a solution. I'll gladly give you the money back. Look, here he comes with your friend."

Rainbow Dash carried a baby in a small basket with the woman from before following her. She gave an upnod at Joseph as an idea struck her mind.

"Why don't we just take the baby with us? He's so small, it wouldn't mean a thing to the plane."

"Rainbow Dash! You can't be serious!"

Polnareff snickered as he kicked the landing wheel of the aircraft.

"Actually Old Man, that's a pretty good idea! The only Stand to move at this speed with a long range is [Star Seraphim], and although we've seen strange Stands, this thing is definitely normal! We should be just fine! What do you think, Jotaro?"

"Nothing scares me more than Granddad's shitty flying skills."

"Heh! Kakyoin?"

Kakyoin stared intently at the baby. He knew he heard crying from somewhere before he woke up. The baby leered at him with an open smile, with small fangs. He blinked and the baby was struggling in his sleep like before. He shook his head before nodding.

"Yes... I believe we should take him too."

"There ya go! Any objections?"

No one. The baby boarded on. Once more cramped and squished together. Despite this, Kakyoin and Polnareff began to doze off. Once they closed their eyes, they opened them to an amusement park. They were at the top of a ferris wheel, and the dead dog from before was in front of them.

"T-This is! This is a continuation of my dream this morning! Polnareff we're in a dream!"

"... Oh okay."

He sat down with a calm smile as Zecora appeared next to him.

"Oh hey. Apparently we're in Kakyoin's dream."

"... Huh?"

Kakyoin shoved a finger in Polnareff's face as he paled.

"Don't take this lightly! We're in grave danger!"

"Only if you think so! Notice how me and her are calm. Look!"

An ice cream cone and popcorn appeared in his hands as Zecora wore a strange crown that resembled a flame.

"I made these appeared with a thought, even Zecora's getting into it."

"I am the Fire Lord, who rules over all flame in this world."

"See?"

Kakyoin ran a hand through his hair with a groan.

"Please, understand! How are we all in the same dream?! That dog was killed here and I was attacked, see this wound!?"

Zecora began to wonder before looking around cautiously.

"This is no dream of pleasantries and hotdog stands, this is the nightmarish work of an enemy Stand!"

"Thank you, Ms. Zecora!"

Polnareff snapped his fingers as an elegant Burger King paper crown appeared on his head.

"Puh~lease! You two are always so serious, I'm telling you getting worked up only makes it worse."

"Polnareff, you fucking idiot, I'm trying to tell you we have no control here! We're not dreaming of Stands. We're being attacked by a Stand of Dreams! [Death 13]!"

"But we're in a dream."

Kakyoin was ready to throw Polnareff out of the ferris wheel before laughing could be heard.

{ "Hahahahaha! He's right! Kakyoin is right about you, fucking moron! " }

Everyone turned to the corpse of the dog. The source of the voice. Something began to protrude and expand in the dog's head. Rainbow Dash appeared next to it with a jolt.

Oh hey guys, what's going on?"

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?"

"What the what is where now?"

She was hit with blood spatter and jumped back with a yelp. A megaphone stuck out of the dog's skull.

{ "Welcome! To My Dreamworld of Death, you stupid bitches!" }

"... Not again..."

Polnareff looked down at his ice cream as it was suddenly that of earthworms. His paper crown caught ablaze as he threw both items at the dog. Death Thirteen finally appeared as he slithered from the hole. It was like that of a strange mix between a clown and a reaper. A Venetian clown mask rather than a skulk with a tall crown. Arms that held a large sickle with a black robe. It swung the scythe and caught everyone but Kakyoin. Pinned to the wall by the blade as the edge neared their throats.

"Ah! Everyone! Summon your Stands!"

Zecora was the first, and only one to respond.

"W-We can't!? We're being dealt with, like ants!"

{ "Isn't it romantic, to die in a dream? Die." }

The scythe cut easily into the wall, yet they all vanished. Death Thirteen leered at Kakyoin.

{ "They got lucky and woke up... But you, Noriaki Kakyoin..." }

The sound of clocks ticking soon echoed powerfully throughout the entire world as Death Thirteen towered over him. Then, it all suddenly stopped.

{ "It's Time To Die..." }

On the plane, there was an argument among the group, causing everyone but Kakyoin to wake up. Someone had to change the baby. Pinkie Pie rolled her eyes and dug into her hair.

"Fine! I'll get Polnareff to do it! HEY, POLPOL, ARE YOU AWAKE YET!?"

"Gyah! Mèmè, I can hear you just fine, just stop yelling!"

"Good. Change the baby for us would you, he's starting to smell."

"Why me?!"

"Cause you just happen to have 'crappy' luck! Get it?"

"Je jure que tu me détestes."

Polnareff took the dirty diaper off and shrieked at the sight and smell.

"U-Ugh! Why'd you go and do this now!? Aren't you ashamed of yourself?!"

"Polnareff he's like three months old, shut up I'm flying here, just change him."

"Fine, Old Pissy Pants."

"Good to hear, Dirty Toilet Licker."

The girls all laughed as Jotaro looked back at the baby. He could've sworn that he spoke. Then he noticed Kakyoin. Muttering his sleep as he fidgeted. Then, flew into a frenzy.

"STOP IT! STOP IT, NO! NOOO! ! !"

He thrashed around wildly and kicked the controls before being restrained by Pinkie Pie's Candy Shop and Ra using small golden bars to keep him still. Yet the damage had been done. Joseph couldn't even adjust his headset he wore to focus on flying the plane.

"We're going down! What the Hell!? Why!? Why can't I just fly a single plane without something fucking up?!"

In the Dreamworld, Kakyoin couldn't move. Even so, Death Thirteen grabbed him by the noodle hair and shoved his half of his head into the wall. Like a strange sponge, he was sucked in and became one with it.

{ "You fool! Fucking Imbecile! Now we're all going to die if Joseph doesn't fix this plane right!" }

"Going to- Your User is the baby!? But-But you can't be anymore than six months!"

A loud buzzer sounded off as Death Thirteen laughed.

{ "Eleven months! I'm eleven months old and an utter genius! I may shit myself, but my intellect runs circkes around you jokers!" }

"But if what you said earlier is true, then they can all hear me! I kno-"

Death Thirteen shed eyeballs from his eyes into Kakyoin's mouth as he began to shout. Choking him and disgusting him all at once. It laughed with a flourish off it's scythe.

{ "You idiot! You're as bad as Polnareff! I knew you would try to snitch on me like a filthy rat, but announcing you will!? You're proving how much smarter I am! In fact I think you did that on purpose! Is that it?! You liked to get choked? Hahahaha! What a creep!" }

Kakyoin couldn't believe this. Kinkshamed by a baby while choking in an amusement park by eyeballs. He hated how embarrassing this was, but what he hated more was that he couldn't warn his friends. Then, it hit him. He had taken the switchblade from the girl sent back to Hong Kong. He wiggled and squirmed, with enough luck to free one arm he took it out and began to carve into his other arm.

"Grr! I'm still awake?"

{ "No one's going to notice a cut from a blade not even half as big as my dick, and I'm still a baby!" }

"You need more than a change of diapers... A bar of soap and a good spanking should do you good..."

{ "... Wait did you swallow those eyeballs just to say that corny line?" }

Rainbow Dash used Star Seraphim to kick the the plane into a more stable state in the air h as Joseph used Hermit Purple to stabilize the controls. Just in the nick of time did he pull the plane back up.

"HA! SEE THAT, SHITTY PILOT SKILLS MY ASS! EAT A DICK JOTARO!"

"Hey Grandad, there's a coconut tree incoming."

The plane lost a wing and before impact, Jotaro and Joseph made eye contact.

"Told you, you were a shitty pilot. It was too good to be true."

"GODDAMMIT! ! ! !"

They crashed, which woke Kakyoin up. Miraculously, no one was injured. They made camp there, as Egypt was finally within reach. Polnareff was infuriated.

"Even though we all lived, this is literally all your fault, Kakyoin! What the Hell happened!?"

"... I... I don't know... Am so, tired, drained... Am I unfit to go on?"

Joseph shook his head.

"I doubt it. It's been over a month since we left Japan. We've practically been at war since, it makes sense to be weary."

Zecora looked the baby over with a surprised look.

"The child's fever is gone, although close, this day has been won."

She sat down next to Kakyoin and spoke quietly.

"His fever was one I have seen many times over, although cruel of me to say, his life should be over."

"W-What? Why?"

"That specific fever is a symptom, one that comes when one has developed, when one has matured enough to wield a Stand as a weapon."

Kakyoin's eyes widened.

"Like Mrs. Kujo... But that means, the baby is..."

She looked down at his sleeve, bloodstained and still wet. She pulled it back with a small gasp. Crudely carved onto his forearm was were the words, Baby Stand.

"When did this happen?"

"On the plane, when Ms. Pie and I had you restrained. Though their attention was on surviving, I could not ignore the blood on your sleeve suddenly appearing."

Pinkie Pie and Joseph started a fire and began to cook as Jotaro and Rainbow Dash used the radio. They knew the risk of DIO and His minions, but in their minds, this was vest for the baby. As everyone huddled around the fire, the baby growled to himself. He was hungry, and the food was just about done. He should've been the one to taste it, not Polnareff! He was perturbed, until he saw the scorpion by his side.

"ah! when did- i have to kill it, fast!"

It almost killed him with it's poison stinger. Yet the baby was one step ahead. He used his safety pin to stab the scorpion and held it up smugly. Then he saw not just Kakyoin staring at him, but Zecora and Pinkie Pie too. Kakyoin stood up.

"I'm not alone on this, am I!? That baby, he just killed a scorpion in a blink of an eye!"

Everyone turned to look at the baby. Pinkie Pie nodded.

"I saw the scorpion right there in the crib and the baby remove the pin, but... I blinked and it vanished."

Zecora shook her head.

"I too could have sworn, that very child held it up with much scorn!"

Joseph was shocked yet, skeptical.

"So neither of you can confirm what he's saying, did the baby kill it? Is it even still there? The heat today was strong after all. It just hit sunset."

"Mr. Old Man! I swear!"

Kakyoin searched the crib as Joseph held the baby. Nothing. He glared and reached for the child.

"It's in your clothes isn't it!? Where are you hiding it?!"

"Kakyoin! That's enough! We're going to discuss it in the morning."

"But-But, Joseph!"

"In! The morning!"

Joseph then tried to spoon feed the baby, yet he refused to open his mouth.

"Huh? What's with you, aren't you hungry?"

He was starving, and soup smelled so good, but he couldn't open his mouth. Kakyoin unknowingly saved the baby's cover.

"I know what I'm talking about! I don't know where he his the scorpion, but I know, one hundred and one percent! That baby is a Stand User! Look!"

He rolled up his sleeves, expecting the group to get it. But no one did. Everyone, but Zecora, took a step back.

"... N-! No! You have to believe me! Please! Ms. Zecora?"

"... I have my doubts but... It could also be a case like the [Sun], I am positive the number of us that know for sure are none."

"Ugh! J-Jotaro? Dash!?"

The two looked away with a huff. Kakyoin turned to Polnareff, but knew all too well he was crazy in his eyes. He only had one person.

"Nana... Please...!"

"... I... Trust, Kakyoin."

Everyone was surprised, Kakyoin himself felt relief like never before as Pinkie Pie spoke up.

"He's come through for us when we were all in tight spots! It was his subtle thinking that got us off that first plane alive! When J. Geil had us pinned down, Kakyoin was the one who gave you the opening, Polnareff. Even with [Wheel Of Fortune], we would be paste right now if he didn't save us with that winch cable! I believe in Kakyoin, no matter what. He's not only the last person to go crazy, he's the last person to hurt an innocent person unless he was absolutely sure. Y'know, like how you all went swinging at that bar when we were looking for the driver!?"

Everyone looked down at that. Pinkie folded her arms and looked at the baby.

"My Pinkie Sense has been going off ever since Polnareff went to sleep, and that baby is the reason for it. You can call us crazy if you want."

"... Thank you..."

Kakyoin was saved. Everyone was doubting the baby now, and he knew it. The child was in a bind. Everything was perfect until that pink witch opened her mouth! Jotaro approached the baby with a steely gaze.

"Open your mouth."

The baby simply stared at him, then Star Platinum poked his stomach, forcing him to spit the scorpion out. Like a smoking gun, the evidence was there and it was clear, Kakyoin was right all along. Joseph placed him near the radio.

"Now then, tell us all you can you little munchkin. [Hermit Purple]!"

Joseph sent his thorns into the child's head and radio, the device turning on as His voice was heard. DIO.

"Manish Boy... I, DIO, have need of you. I respect the intelligence you have... But what good is it to waste on fooling poor fools. With your newfound power, I, DIO, can show you how to grow, into a true man. All you have to do... Is kill the Joestars... But be careful, they're tricky, like how they're listening in right now. Right, Joseph Joestar?"

"What!?"

The radio blew up as the baby smiled, and took a handful of powder from under his turban, blowingit in the faces of everyone. Without warning, they all fell asleep. They all woke up in the center of the strange amusement park. Polanerff eyes widened in fear.

"Damn! That little shit! He had some strange drug just in case he was found out!"

Jotaro looked around with Joseph.

"So this is his Stand ability...?"

"Ugh~ Are those tentacles! Why're those here!?"

Polnareff's hair suddenly extended and split apart, tying him down in between two pillars.

"What the Hell!?"

Jotaro's chain lifted up on it's own and began to choke him.

"Betrayed by my own key chain... This is literally the second worst fucking dream."

Joseph's mechanical arm inflated and became too heavy for him to even budge.

"Holy Shit! T-This is what Kakyoin tried to save us from!? W-Where is he?!"

Pinkie Pie began to float off the ground as her hair and tongue became like that of large balloons. She flailed around helplessly with muffled grunts. Rainbow Dash's hair melted, the liquid forming sad clown makeup on her face as her shoes became heavy weights.

"No! You cant do this, this is pure evil!"

Zecora's fingers became matchsticks that were burning at the tip. She hissed in agony, only to realize that even her mohawk had became a strange series of candles. The wax melted quickly and burned her scalp as it drizzled down.

"A world of insanity, ruled by a child of vanity! Only a single rule does he follow..."

They all saw it. Death Thirteen floating their way as numerous objects with silly faces laughed and chanted a single word in a sing song fashion. Lali-Ho. It flourished it's scythe and swung it around masterfully.

"And that rule is to send us to the gallows!"

Jotaro glared at Death Thirteen before raising a fist.

"[Star Platinum]!"

Polnareff remembered then, that terrifying fact.

"Jotaro! We can't summon our Stands her-"

Star Platinum appeared from a sudden puff of smoke. Then, threw a flurry of thunderous punches right at Jotaro, sending him into Polnareff. Polnareff acted as a sling shot, firing Jotaro back to Star Platinum, another series of attacks before he was thrown into Pinkie Pie. Popping her balloons from the force. She flew around as air escaped the holes before she laid completely flat at Joseph's feet.

"Pinkie! You're still alive, right!?"

"Pffftthhpb."

"Oh thank God."

Jotaro fell next to Rainbow Dash. He could only sit up as he rolled his shoulder.

"No wonder people don't get back up when I hit them. You weren't kidding around Dash."

"See! See!? Your Stand's just insanely strong for no reason!"

Star Platinum laughed dumbly, like an idiot who never got the joke but laughed when everyone else did. A frying pan appeared in his hand. He smacked himself with it, each time a stupid face would be there, each one more cartoonish than the last. He stopped once the heads resembled a dinner plate and spun around. With a puff of smoke, the head was replaced by Death Thirteen's head.

{ "Lali-Ho~! I'm a fake!" }

It began to morph into a strange amalgamation, an ugly fusion of all of their Stands as the original Death Thirteen spoke. It cut the head off and floated over the body.

{ "[Death 13] Is the most powerful Stand yet! No matter what you do or how hard you try, you'll never summon your Stand here! You're all asleep! Better yet, even if you were to wake up, you'd only remember my good friend, Jack Shit! Lali-" }

Death Thirteen stopped upon feeling a strange grip on it's throat and looked back. The one Stand that was missing. Hierophant Green.

"Lali-Ho."

Everyone suddenly returned to normal, healed even as the faces and odd sounds around the world vanished. Kakyoin sat in a teacup ride with a smug smirk.

"So it seems that when one summons their Stand before resting, it follows them into their dreams. Useful tidbit of information now, isn't it?"

Death Thirteen swung the scythe wildly, yet Hierophant Green turned into thin tendrils, and began to slither into the ears of Death Thirteen.

"It's time for that spanking, baby. My [Hierophant] loves enclosed areas, but he's quivering rather violently. He only does that, when he's tearing something up."

Death Thirteen moaned and whimpered. Even slicing itself in half, revealing that nothing was under the robe. However, Kakyoin, stood up just fine. Hierophant Green had already entered Death Thirteen.

"Now then... To lay this final dream to rest!"

He raised a hand and brought it down. Jotaro woke up with a weight on him. He sighed and saw the cause.

"Dash, you do realize we have sleeping bags, right?"

She opened her eyes lazily before jumping up to her feet.

"Hey! W-What're we doing on the ground!? Weren't we flying?!"

"Yeah, though I see the plane crashed."

Joseph looked back with a fierce glare.

"Don't even start. This old man just opened a can of soup, don't make him open a can of whoop ass next."

Mannish Boy sighed. No one remembered that he lost, in fact they had forgotten the crash. Then he saw Kakyoin hover over him.

"It's good that they forgot. It makes this so much easier. You're too young for me to physical harm you... But unlike Jotaro or Dash, I don't need to punch you."

He began to change Mannish Boy's diaper, but scooped a small piece of his poop up. He dropped and stirred it in a small bowl. He finished changing the baby, handed him to Joseph, who forcibly fed him the poop soup. Pinkie Pie hugged Kakyoin tightly.

"You're not the only one who remembered. I've always got your back."

Kakyoin slowly hugged back. Polnareff tilted his head at the sight.

"Que? What's with the sudden hugging?"

Everyone could do with a good hug every now and again! Y'know what? Group hug!"

"N-No thanks, I'm good!"

Polnareff turned to walk away but was dragged in by Candy Shop, nearly choking him. Joseph radioed for help but was confused upon hearing a team was already sent their way. No one cared Mannish Boy's cries, for some reason they simply didn't like the child. Still, everyone shared a similar thought. This was a band of nutjobs and freaks, but there was no one else they knew better than to trust their lives with. Mannish Boy was taken home and sent to a small orphanage as the group boarded a boat, headed for the Red Sea. Egypt was so close, as were the days to Holy's illness. Time was against them, if not the whole world. Jotaro looked out to the sea with a lit cigarette. For the first time he wondered, what was DIO planning this whole time? Only time itself would tell. He looked to Rainbow Dash by his side, leaning over the rail as she looked into the sea.

"You're not gonna fall overboard again, are you?"

"Shut up, not like you won't dive in."

"With sea life like this down there? I just might."

"Wait, you like the ocean?"

"Yeah. You didn't know?"

"I'm not sure you've noticed, but you're about as easy to read as the Rosetta Stone!"

"I am? I thought I was easy to read."

She groaned and looked out to the blue sea. Rainbow Dash didn't know what to think if her situation. She lost the shard back home, and was attacked by Nightmare Moon or Princess Luna, she couldn't tell. Jotaro offered her a rolled up magazine. Aquatic life.

"I'm not sure if you're into this kind of thing, but you're thinking too hard again. Just relax, we'll figure it out. We always do."

She looked between him and magazine before sighing.

"Yeah. We're the Star Crossed Duo, or whatever."