"For starters, I think it comes down to honesty."
They'd finished their hot chocolate and moved upstairs to Sayori's room. Monika was leaning against the doorframe and Sayori was whizzing between her closet and bureau, assembling her outfit for the day. The first few rays of the sun were shining in through the bedroom window, and some birds could be heard chirping, as well. Monika was reminded faintly of that first morning when she'd woken up in this new world. She hummed thoughtfully before replying.
"Well, naturally," she said. "I've always tried to be honest with you though, haven't I?"
Sayori, who had been considering a polka-dot tank top, hummed thoughtfully and returned the article to its drawer. "Well, I'm sure you've tried to be honest, but I don't that you've succeeded one hundred percent…no offense."
Monika looked at her friend confusedly. "None taken, but…well, I'm sure that I haven't lied to you at all. Not once."
"Well, it's not really a matter of lying…" Sayori continued. Having had finally gathered the pieces of her outfit together in one place, she began to lift her shirt up and over her head before pausing and looking over her shoulder at her friend questioningly. "You don't mind if I change, do you?"
"Oh, not at all. It's your room, after all," Monika replied, gesturing for Sayori to continue. As she did so, she turned away from her friend – somehow, it didn't feel right to watch her as she did it.
Sayori smiled and gave a thumbs up before resuming undressing. "Well, like I was saying – and it's a little bit hard to describe, but – lately, it's seemed like you've been holding something back from people. It's like sometimes you won't want to talk at all and other times you'll say too much. Whenever people talked to you, you clammed up, but whenever you talked to other people, you were super blunt."
Monika thought back to her conversation with Yuri the day before and winced. "That's fair."
Sayori nodded in acknowledgement before looking off to the side nervously. "Sorry, it feels weird to talk about you so…umm…meanly."
Monika shook her head emphatically. "It's not mean, Sayori. I promise. This is actually helping me a lot, so please continue."
Sayori took a breath and smiled. "Okay. So I think that it's important for you to be more honest in both of those situations that I just mentioned – to say what you're really feeling, you know? That way, you'll still have something to say when you're uncomfortable and you'll be less, you know, bold when you, yourself talk." She punctuated her point by balling up her shirt and lobbing it into an overstuffed hamper which was slouching forlornly in the corner of the room. She hopped up on one foot. "Oh! Score!"
"Nice," Monika said with a wistful smile. "Well, I understand what you're saying, but how will being honest make me feel better about talking to people?"
Sayori hummed, slipping off her shorts. "Well, it may not right away. It's possible to pull off a conversation while still feeling really uncomfortable and stuff." She paused for a moment, staring off into space. Then, as though she was blowing away a cluster of rainclouds, Sayori shook her head and reached for a flowery t-shirt. "Anyways, if you're honest with how you're feeling and what you truly want to say, then people will understand you a whole lot better."
Monika stroked her chin thoughtfully. "So, let's say I was uncomfortable in a certain situation. If I were to, say, tell people that I was feeling that way…they'd give me time to recollect myself?"
Sayori slipped on a pair of denim shorts and considered the question for a moment. "They might. But what's important is that they'll, like, expicitly know how you're feeling. From then on, if the conversation goes wrong, it's no longer your fault."
"I see," Monika mumbled distractedly, still deep in thought. "It's 'explicitly,' by the way."
"Yeah, that," Sayori said with a giggle. She trotted past Monika with a skip and a smile. "And now it's time to brush my teeth~"
Monika cracked a smile. As Sayori passed her on the way out the door, she playfully nudged her friend with an elbow. "No bra?"
Sayori sighed dramatically. "Oh, how I wish that I needed one. I'm barely a b-cup. It wouldn't even do anything."
Monika chuckled. "Well, I think that…" She trailed off and covered her mouth. "N-Nevermind."
Sayori turned back to Monika, eyes wide and curious. "What?"
"It's nothing," Monika said, her smile faltering a bit. "Go brush your teeth."
Sayori didn't reply immediately, but instead planted her hands firmly on her hips and stared down Monika for a solid few seconds. "Monikaaa. Think about it."
Monika regarded Sayori quizzically for a moment before the tumblers fell into place. "Oh, right. Honesty. Okay, well, I was just going to say that…" She cleared her throat. "That I think they suit you just fine."
Sayori blushed a little. "O-Oh."
Monika gulped, her gut twisting around itself quite suddenly. It was with a significant amount of effort that she opened her mouth again to ask, "D-Did I mess up?"
"No, just…" Sayori covered her mouth with her hands, but Monika still saw her smiling wider than she'd ever seen her before. "That's, like, the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me. T-Thank you so much."
Monika chuckled. "The nicest thing ever? That's hard to believe."
Sayori squinted over her hands. "You meanie." She turned on her heel and marched into the bathroom.
Monika's smile faltered. "W-Wait, did I offend you or something?!" Monika asked, rushing over to the bathroom door. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to – I meant, like – I was trying to say that you – "
"Monika, relax," Sayori said. She was already combing her hair, and by Monika's estimation, she seemed fine. She offered up a small smile. "I know what you meant, I was just making a joke."
Monika sighed and crossed her arms, looking down at the ground. "Okay…"
Sayori grabbed a nearby tube of toothpaste and regarded her friend sympathetically. "Sorry. I probably should've told you that I wasn't being serious."
"No, no, it's fine," Monika said.
Sayori hummed. "Sometimes, you can feel uncertain even when you say the right thing. It's super frustrating."
Monika chuckled dryly. "Yeah. I just wish I had more confidence, or – I just wish I knew what I was doing wrong."
Sayori brushed her teeth swiftly and gargled some water, spitting it out gently into the sink below. "It's hard to know. Talking to people is a skill, but it's not like other skills where the problems are tangible and have direct solutions."
"Or where improvement is something that can actually be measured," Monika remarked bitterly.
Sayori squinted at her friend half-jokingly. "Of course, it would be easier if I knew what was bothering you specifically…"
Monika looked off to the side. "Sorry," she said quietly.
With a hum, Sayori walked out of the bathroom and patted her friend on the shoulder. "It's okay. Things are going to get better, I promise."
"How?" Monika asked incredulously. "Your advice is great, but…I mean, you're telling me to be honest with other people when just talking to them at all is already difficult. Saying what's really on my mind all of the time would be – I mean, how could anyone talk without holding something back, even if it's only a little? And it seems like the only way that I could possibly improve would be to keep throwing myself into social situations and flopping around like a dying fish until I get the hang of it."
Sayori smiled sympathetically.
Monika's shoulders slumped.
"Oh, no…" she groaned.