Author's Note:

Surprise! I figured since we're getting close to the end and I don't want to wait an entire month before starting to post book two I thought I'd get an extra chapter out a week! It'll still take a couple weeks to finish up book one but I am just super excited to begin book two I thought it'd be nice to do this :)

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Sirius seemed a little distant on Monday, and Remus knew it was because of him bringing up the broken arm. He was desperate to apologize, to fix things, but didn't know how without making it obvious. Sirius seemed fine with James and Peter however whenever he spoke to Remus there just seemed to be something... stiff in the way he spoke. Or maybe Remus was just imagining it. That was a possibility. Was he just projecting? As the day progressed, though, Sirius seemed to relax a little more until Tuesday he was back to normal (which proved to Remus he had been upset on Monday). He... really wanted to say he was sorry but figured that would put Sirius back into a shell, so he left it alone.

Dearest Remus, 8/5/72

Only seven weeks now till you come home for the summer! Less than, really, by a couple days. Wait till you see the plans I've made for the garden! Your father's getting me a really beautiful plant called... well, I don't remember exactly what he called it. Some kind of bell? Like bluebell but not quite. But it makes this lovely chiming sound when the wind blows, like wind chimes. I've been sitting out in the garden when the sun's out enjoying the sound. I think you'll like it too. Lyall says it blooms through July so you'll have time to enjoy them too. They still chime even when they're not in the ground so once they grow some more I'm going to try to cut one to put in a jar by the window to see if it works that way.

I mentioned the possibility of us educating you at home after this, by the way. Lyall is worried since he works so much but I'm sure I can do plenty out of books. You can't actually practice any magic however I don't think that's too terribly important, is it? Sometimes I think it might be easier for us... for YOU... if we were more Muggle. We'd have an easier time hiding the truth. I have not mentioned this to your father though but perhaps it's something we can talk about once summer comes around. Your father's not doing a particularly overly magical job as it is. Perhaps we could move to a Muggle town, and start anew. You'd be even safer. Or would the M be more suspicious if that happened? I don't really understand them much.

I miss you, darling, and I cannot wait to see you. I love you so much!

Love, Mother

"You all right?" James asked, voice penetrating Remus's thoughts. "You've gone quite pale."

"Is your mum okay?" Pete asked, since he realized Remus was reading the letter his owl had brought him.

"Y-yes. I mean-I think so. Nothing bad." He swiftly folded the letter, jamming it down into his bag. He should probably start reading his letters privately in case one of them saw the words. He knew Sirius often read his letters privately. Whenever the stately owl brought him something he'd just tuck it away, and that would be that, like he just did when the owls came a few moments ago. "She's mostly all right," Remus finally said, trying to smile.

Move to a Muggle town. Was his mother insane? He and his father pretending to be Muggle? His father would die. Sure his mother ran a fairly Muggle household but magic was everywhere. His father used magic every single day, for everything. Plus the Ministry would probably know. The only way to truly escape would be move to a different country. Or was that what his mother meant? She had some American relatives. What if she wanted to move to America? America was enormous, they'd definitely be able to hide there.

Remus stirred his porridge, thinking. Wondering, about what it would be like. Going possibly to a Muggle school. Not having to really hide as much as he was. Oh, but they'd know he was different. He'd still have to fake an illness. One that would be difficult to explain to the teachers at a Muggle school. Plus... didn't Muggle schools have gym? A class period dedicated to... sports or something? Ugh! No, it wouldn't work out at all. He'd still be faking every single day, trying to be normal. Unless she still meant to educate him at home even in a new town, a new country.

He slid his bowl away, not hungry anymore. He felt like weeping. Or raging. Throw a temper tantrum. Punch a wall. He wanted to stay at Hogwarts! It was as safe as anywhere! He liked his little house in Hogsmeade, liked it more than the basement at home. He liked most his classes, liked learning, liked practicing. Above all he liked his friends-Merlin, he felt ill imagining not having his friends anymore (he knew one day that would happen but for now he could pretend, push the inevitable mental breakdown off until it happened).

I have that idea from Fawley up my sleeve though, he thought, staring at the ceiling. It was raining out so the ceiling was full of grey swirls, fake rain pattering down which disappeared long before it reached the heads of any of the kids eating. He half considered writing to his mother with this idea however knew it'd be better to save it, to say in person. It would wait till summer, providing she was still on this weird kick of hers. Not that his father would ever agree to go completely Muggle. Or... would he? For Remus's safety? He had given so much up already, would he make one more sacrifice?

Gave up his job, to keep Remus safe.

Gave up his family, to keep Remus safe.

Would he give up magic?

()

The Lupins had moved to a country house somewhere in the deep depths of America, hidden away from prying eyes. Lyall learned how to drive (the American way, on the wrong side of the road), driving ages to a nearby town for his new job. There wasn't a scrap of magic anywhere in the house except around the basement, silencing spells, locking spells. Other than that the Lupins pretended to be Muggle. And got away with it, hardly interacting with anyone. Ever again. Remus sat at the table with his mother as she recited from a book to teach him (not that Muggles would have a giant book titled Muggle Education). Remus was twelve. Then thirteen. Fourteen. He and his mother sat at the table as the seasons passed by in the windows behind them. Sometimes Lyall was there, mostly he wasn't. It was just Hope and Remus. Sixteen. Eighteen. Seasons passed by faster and faster. Twenty. Twenty-two. He looked more like his father than he'd probably turn out to be, but he was still small, delicate. Twenty-five. Thirty. His mother was aging, grey hair, wrinkles. She still recited from the book. He was fifty now, then sixty. His mother shrank into a skeleton and now he had the book in his hands, an elderly man, carefully reading the words, the only words he ever knew anymore because this wasn't just his home; it was his world now. His prison. His grave.

Remus jolted awake, loud sobs escaping his mouth. He gasped for air, trying to breath, hiccuping sounds escaping out as he struggled. Finally he was able to get some oxygen into his lungs and he collapsed onto his side, hands over his eyes, body curling into a little comma shape as he cried.

Amidst his tears he waited for Sirius to open his curtains... but it didn't happen. He's still mad at me, he thought as the tears finally began tapering off. He gave one last sniffle then edged his way out of his bed, wiping the snot from his face. When he slid out into the cool dorm he saw Sirius's curtains were open, his bed empty. Immediately Remus's eyes darted to James's bed. He tiptoed over, pulling back a corner of James's curtains. Sirius was there, limbs tangled with James's limbs as they both slept soundly.

There was a letter next to Sirius, probably the letter that had come that day. Angry slashing across the cream parchment. Remus felt a wave of curiosity... then shut the curtains. It wans't his business.

He went into the bathroom to wash his face off, trying to shake off his nightmare. His strange, strange nightmare. He hadn't died, hadn't transformed, hadn't been caught. It was just him withering away in hiding. For safety. He jerked his chin up, staring miserably at his reflection. Other werewolves did that. Hid themselves away from the world, disappeared into who-knows-where to live. Or not live, more like merely existing. It didn't seem like living, not to Remus. No one but his parents. Nothing but the confines of the house. He couldn't do it. He'd rather die. He'd rather be caught then end up like that. There had to be a nice balance between remaining hidden and actually living. He turned around, leaning against the sink, surveying the bathroom. What would happen after Hogwarts? Would it be like that even if they remained in Wales? Just that little cottage, nothing else.

He slid down to the ground, burying his face in his hands again, definitely not cried out quite yet.

()

On Thursday the Marauders got (some) revenge against Snape. When the four went into Potions Remus and Peter headed for their normal desk but James and Sirius led them to a different one, a little bit farther back. The reason was soon obvious: Sirius put a sticking spell on Snape's seat just as he sat down. When he stood up later, to go get water for the potion, there was a loud ripping sound and his robes were split open. It wasn't the seat of his pants like James had hoped for, but it was something. Snape looked at his robes with horror then his eyes snapped up to the Marauders before he snatched his cauldron, storming to the back.

"That it?" Remus whispered, thinking it was a bit of a dull response.

"No, just the beginning," James replied. They were sitting together, having partnered up. Sirius and Peter were at another desk. "We've got more."

Remus glanced at Snape. "Like what?"

"Er, we'll figure something out..." James frowned. "The problem is not getting caught. Most of what we've come up with is flat out attacking him which-well, I want to be sneakier about it. Y'know?"

"Hmm." Remus drummed his fingers against the desk as Snape returned to his seat. "Can you provide a distraction?"

James blinked slowly. "Distractions," he said with a grin, "are my specialty. Everyone or just Big Nose?"

"Just Snape."

"Got it. Let me know when."

Remus dug around in his potions kit. "When," he said, sliding out of his seat.

James wadded up a piece of parchment, throwing it at Snape. He threw a couple more until Snape turned in his seat, glowering. James began babbling about the ripped robes as Remus walked to the front of the room, past the desk where Snape sat. His hand went so fast he doubted anyone would notice. He didn't even pause, just kept going until he reached Slughorn's desk. He had an empty jar in one hand, asking Slughorn for some more porcupine quills, saying he had used them up. Slughorn refilled the jar and Remus returned back to his seat.

"What did you do?" James whispered. He hadn't seen Remus's hand flick the petals into fire under Snape's cauldron.

Remus looked innocent. "I got more porcupine quills." He rattled the jar. "See? Anyway, if it's okay with you can you make the potion while I read the instructions? I'm not good at that part of potion making."

He settled back with the book, casting surreptitious glances at Snape. Thankfully his partner today was Avery and not Lily. If it had been Lily Remus never would have done it, since the scent would affect whoever sat next to him. After about five minutes he noticed Snape's shoulders shaking slightly. Then Avery began snickering. Soon both of them were laughing. Remus could smell it too, and had to resist the giggling that wanted to come up.

Slughorn approached their desk as they were both laughing so hard tears ran down their faces. One of the potion ingredients were amphyr petals, one of the first ingredients, and it seemed one of them had dropped or spilled a few petals into the fire. Though the ones for this potion were dried and therefore did not give off the scent, their giggly effect had come out in the smoke. Slughorn removed a couple points for their clumsiness (stating he expected better of Snape), told them they'd have to make it up later, then had them leave. They stumbled and tripped over themselves as they laughed their way out of the classroom. Slughorn put out their fire and got rid of the smoke before anyone else started (there were a few giggles nearby, and Remus gave in as well to his).

James nudged Remus then held his hand out under the desk. It took a few seconds for Remus to realize then he gave James a quiet low five.

()

"Brilliant," Sirius said when they were far enough away from anyone else so James could tell the other two. "Hit him where it hurts. His precious Pooottioonns."

"Unfortunately he'll have a chance to make it up," sighed James.

"Still, I bet he's furious," snickered Peter. "Embarrassed him, in front of the whole class! He probably blames Avery, too."

"No, he knows it wasn't," Remus said. "Not Snape. He wouldn't let anyone else handle making the potion, except maybe Lily. No. He's the one who handled the ingredients. He'll know he didn't drop any. He'll know someone else did it."

Snape was waiting for them on the next floor, knowing the route the Gryffindors typically took to their tower. His arms were folded as he leaned back against the wall, his robes still ripped in the back. As soon as he saw the four of them he unfolded his arms, storming over. "I know you did it," he hissed, wand pointing right between James's eyes.

"Did what?" James asked. "Rip your robes? Cause Sirius did that, not me."

"Guilty as charged," Sirius said, twirling his wand. "Was hoping to get your trousers, to be honest."

Snape's eyes darted back and forth between them. "No. The petals."

"What petals?" James asked. "The ones Sluggy yelled at you for?"

Snape's eyes glittered angrily. "Professor Slughorn. Yes. You did that."

"You caught me," James said with a shrug. "I turned invisible and put them in the fire." Snape's expression flickered slightly. James began laughing. "Merlin, I had nothing to do with that!"

"You sure seem paranoid, Snapey ol' chum," Sirius said, tilting his head. "Dropping petals and blaming us."

"I-did-not-drop them!" Snape took in a deep breath, nostrils flaring. The tip of his wand was less than an inch away from James now. "I don't know how you managed but you did."

James straightened his shoulders then reached up, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose, his finger brushing against the end of Snape's wand. "You're paranoid. Blimey. Not like it matters, Sluggy likes you. He'll give you a chance to make it up, eh?"

"PROFESSOR!" Snape snarled. "Slughorn! Stop calling him Sluggy!"

James-truly the most Gryffindor out of all of them no matter what McGonagall said to Remus-casually put his finger against Snape's wand and pushed it aside. "Paranoid, or confused." James's eyes went innocently wide.

"He sounds a bit confused," Sirius agreed.

Snape stared at James, then at Sirius, then glanced briefly at Peter and Remus. Then back to James. Then Snape flicked his wand, saying some spell Remus didn't recognize. There was a cracking sound. James's glasses. Cracks appeared across their lenses and James flung them off his face just in time: mid-air, the lenses exploded.

"YOU ABSOLUTE CRACKED CAULDRON!" James screamed. "YOU COULD HAVE BLINDED ME!"

"I know it's be a tragedy for you, Potter, to never see your own reflection again!" Snape retorted.

Then spells began flying since Sirius shot towards him. Snape ducked easily, sending a spell back. The other Marauders got their wands out though James had some trouble since his eyesight was pretty dang bad. Three (and a half?) against one so Snape knew he'd lose but he hit Sirius with that weird langlock spell before Remus's jelly-leg curse got him and he began flailing around, unable to stand upright. Then he was pushed backwards by a knockback jinx from Peter. He didn't go through the air but he did fall back, crashing into the ground. James shot the hairy bat-bogey hex but it went far above Snape's head.

"Langlock!" Remus tried, imitating Snape's wand movement. It didn't work. Not quite right. Snape howled in pain as his tongue began thrashing about-as if someone had grabbed the end of it and was yanking it about.

James was still screaming at Snape, using obscenities now. He was shooting spells wildly until Sirius grabbed his arm, pulling him back. He was making frantic gestures and that's when Remus heard hurried footsteps.

James spit on Snape, probably aiming for his face but the saliva landed on Snape's chest. "You're going to regret this, Snivellus!" Then ran with Sirius guiding him, Peter right behind them. Remus scooped up the broken glasses and took off after his friends.

They were on the fourth floor, near the painting that led to that weird pit-filled passageway; that's where they went. Peter shoved the painting aside and the four scrambled into the darkness. They fled down the steps, stopping at the first pit. They didn't go any farther even though they could pass this one.

"Shit!" James swore, rubbing his eyes. "He's insane! He could have-the glass-! My glasses! I forgot my glasses!"

Remus took James's hand and pressed the frames into them. "I got them. No lenses though, they're completely gone."

James put the empty frames on his face. "I'll have to send these to my parents to get fixed. I have a backup pair here luckily. Old ones. Ugly ones."

"If they broke on your face..." Peter whispered anxiously. He began rubbing just under his own eyes, as if he could imagine the glass going into his eyeballs. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I guess." James fiddled with the frames then put them into his pocket. "Siri, are you all right?"

Sirius shook his head. "Nnnhhh. Glhhgnnng."

"You'll have to see Pomfrey," Remus said. "That's the same spell he used on me a while ago. It took Pomfrey ages to get it fixed."

"One of you will have to go with him, the other with me. I can't see worth beans," James said.

Remus and Peter looked at each other. Remus really didn't particularly want to go to the hospital wing but neither did Peter. They did wand-potion-book which Remus thankfully won. Peter pulled a face then left with Sirius, while Remus went with James almost immediately regretting winning as he kept having to grab James's arm to stop him from running in to things.

"I'm sick of Snape," James spat out. "He's going to get it."

"Yeah," Remus mumbled. "I know, we'll get revenge."

James rubbed his face. "He could have really hurt me. Again! You know, our pranks might be mean sometimes, but have we ever seriously risked his health? I don't think so." Remus didn't say anything, just seized James's sleeve before he smacked into a suit of armor, tugging him aside. "He's dangerous. Something's gotta be done."

"We'll get him back," Remus sighed. Of course they would. They always did. A vicious circle of revenge that Remus wondered would prove to be an ouroboros or if one day there'd be an end. Then he wanted to laugh. Of course there'd be an end: graduation.

"I don't wanna work on the confusing spell thing right now," James muttered. Remus glanced over in surprise. "I mean, it'd just be copying him. We need some time to pass before we can unleash that on him without it seeming copying."

Remus suspected that had more to do with the fact that they were all having a hard time doing the spell. Remus thought he could manage it but without a proper target they wouldn't know, and he was adamant about not using people. He really didn't want to use animals either but it looked like they'd have to.

"What spell was that that shattered my glasses?"

"I didn't really catch all of it, nor recognized it," Remus admitted.

"Ugh. Dumb Snivellus." James kicked at the floor then Remus pulled him back as he almost walked right into a group of students. "There's something not right about it," he continued once they were out of hearing of the others. "Some of these spells he's using aren't... like, regular spells, are they? If you've never heard of them?"

"I... guess." Remus folded his arms, having not thought of that aspect of it before. "I've heard of confundus."

"But it's... advanced. And he can do it. Maybe he isn't eleven. Maybe he's like, really older and pretending to be a first year!"

Remus couldn't help but laugh at that theory. "I think someone would notice. Besides, Lily's known him for a few years."

"Maybe he started it early on, to establish, um, establish a thingie. History." James stopped in his tracks, smacking Remus's face. "Oh Merlin I'm sorry I was trying to grab your shoulders! There we are," he said as he managed to put his hands where he meant to. "Sorry for hitting you. Anyway, you know there's rumors of stuff going on, right?"

"Stuff...?"

"Dark stuff. Like, the whole anti-Muggle stuff, anti-Muggleborn. The riots and all a few years back." James was nodding eagerly. "What if Snape's really involved in all of that and pretending to be a kid to like, try and turn other kids to that belief! He's really an older person, see, taking potions to appear young and-and um, what's the word that means like, getting access to the other side?"

"Infiltrate?"

"Yes! That! What if he's doing that?"

Remus smiled, snickering a little. "Um, that-that is an interesting possibility there, Jimmy, but if that were the case he'd probably be in a different house; most the Slytherins already believe in that Purebloods-Best-Bloods nonsense."

James's face fell a little. "Oh. Right. Well. It was a theory."

"A good one," Remus promised, patting James.

They continued going up to the dorms, James complaining about Snape the entire way while Remus kept having to stop him from running face first into just about everything they came across.