Monika was alone again.
She sighed and picked her fingers up from the piano. Judging from how sore they were beginning to feel, she supposed that she'd been practicing in between chapters. Thinking carefully, she could even recall the next verse of her song. She played a riff experimentally with one hand, and found that she could do so perfectly.
Memories about a time when she didn't even exist, and skills to match those memories, too. It was beyond eerie.
She pulled her hand back again, feeling her digits throb. Should she even bother practicing anymore? He would make sure that the song would get made. What was more, she already knew that she wouldn't mess up when she inevitably performed it onstage. He wouldn't let her.
Monika frowned. But she was here. Here here. Awake. Did he expect her to practice while her fingers hurt? Or was there something else that he wanted her to do?
And then, as if on cue (and Monika knew that it was, indeed, on cue), the sound of footsteps echoed in from the open door of the music room. Soon thereafter came tired panting, and a moment later, Yuri burst into the room. She halted instantly, her foot catching on the ground with a shrill squeak, and in the instant that followed before she turned away, Monika could make out the faintest glimpse of tearstains on her cheeks.
Monika's brow furrowed in anger. First he gave her some time alone with Sayori, then he hurt one of her friends. What was his game? She was starting to wonder whether he was worth all of the trouble that she was going through for him.
With a sigh and a shake of her head, Monika discarded those feelings for the time being. Her friend was in trouble, and she had to help. She cleared her throat.
"Hey, Yuri! What's up?" she asked, trying to keep things casual so as not to put too much pressure on the emotionally sensitive Yuri.
Yuri wiped off her face before turning back around, and Monika pretended not to notice. "N-Nothing," Yuri replied. "I'm sorry, I d-didn't mean to disturb you."
"It's no problem," Monika said. "Um, do you come here often?"
"Yes, occasionally. I come here when I'm…" Yuri trailed off and played with her hair. "Well, I come here sometimes."
Monika offered what she hoped was a natural-looking smile. "Well, it's nice to see you." She paused to think of a topic that she thought was pretty neutral. "Um…Sayori came by and told me that setting up the booth went okay."
Yuri whined and looked down at the ground. "I-It went…fine…"
Monika's throat seized up. Had she already messed up?
But she quelled her anxiety quickly. She'd chosen a perfectly normal thing to talk about, and she was confident that what she had said hadn't been unpleasant. The reason for Yuri's reaction must have been an association by her between what Monika had said and something external that had upset Yuri. Something upsetting had happened to her around the time that she'd set up the booth.
Holding her cards for the time being, Monika swiftly responded. "Did something happen?"
Yuri shook her head. "N-No. I'm fine."
Monika sighed. Then, she thought of something. "Is
this how Sayori feels when she deals with me?
it about your poem?"
Yuri sighed and didn't respond.
Monika hummed, got up from the bench, and walked around the piano to be closer to Yuri, leaning on the instrument with her back.
"What's so important about this poem?" Monika asked. "I've seen you…Well, you've been struggling with it for days."
Yuri's hands started fidgeting with each other, and her eyes fixated themselves on a crack in the floor between her feet. "It's really personal…"
Monika looked off to the side. "Well, if it really upsets you that much, we don't have to talk about it. I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable."
"T-Thanks," Yuri replied.
Monika huffed. Yuri was unhappy, and she didn't want to talk about why. But if Monika said nothing, then Yuri would remain sad. But, the last time that Monika had pressed her into something that she'd felt uncomfortable with, she'd gone completely off the deep end. So if she said anything, she risked upsetting her friend even more.
Was this the extent of her power?
Monika gritted her teeth. No. Yuri had been crying when she'd first walked in. Monika couldn't just leave the conversation there. She would take a calculated risk for the sake of her friend. Monika took a deep breath.
"Um," she muttered. Monika shook her head and spoke again, with more vigor.. "If you don't do anything, you're going to keep feeling uncomfortable. Until something changes, nothing will get better, and you're the only one who can make that change happen."
"I know," Yuri said with a sigh.
The two stood there for a few moments, perfectly silent. Monika's hands gripped the piano tightly. Had she messed up?
"I…" Yuri breathed.
Monika perked up at that, causing Yuri to visibly shy away.
"O-Oh, sorry," Monika stammered, waving her hands. "Please continue. Sorry."
Yuri smiled amusedly. "Did you know that you have a tendency to apologize a lot?"
Monika frowned. "Really?"
"It's true," Yuri replied. "Even if you haven't done anything wrong."
"Huh," Monika said. "Well, actually, that would kind of make sense…"
Yuri hummed, but as the conversation died down once more, her smile faltered. Monika cleared her throat and decided to press her friend a little bit more.
"I, um," she said. "What were you going to say before? I-If you're comfortable talking about it and all."
Yuri took a deep breath. "I…wanted to perform my poem onstage."
"Oh. H-Hey, hold on," Monika stammered. "You know you don't have to do that anymore, right?"
"Yes, I know," Yuri said clearly. To Monika's surprise, she was smiling again, however softly. "This is actually a poem that I've been wanting to…perform for a while now. Even before the festival."
"Oh," said Monika thoughtfully. "You mean, for the club?"
"That's right," Yuri replied. Then, both her smile and her posture dropped. "But I just can't do it…"
Monika clicked her tongue. So Yuri had been thinking about this for a while, then. "If you'd like," she began cautiously. "I could proofread it for you."
"I-I don't know," Yuri said, whining anxiously.
"Wait, i-it's entirely up to you!" Monika exclaimed. "But, um, it might be a good first step if you want to perform it sometime in the future. You wouldn't have to read it out loud. A-And maybe I could tell you if I thought the others would like it…"
Yuri didn't say anything for a moment. Then, she took a deep breath. "Well, if you really think that it would help…"
"I really do," said Monika with a hopeful smile.
Yuri stood still for a moment before reaching into her pocket and pulling out a sheet of pristinely folded notebook paper. She handed it over to Monika, who, with a polite node, unfolded it and began reading.
Finding that she couldn't sit still, Yuri began pacing back and forth across the length of the room. Occasionally, she looked over at Monika, but only for seconds at a time. Mostly, she kept to herself, scratching her forearms absentmindedly.
"This is, uh. Good," said Monika suddenly.
Yuri stopped in her tracks. "R-Really?"
"Yeah. Very good," Monika continued, bringing a hand up to her chin and looking up at Yuri. "Did you write it for anyone in particular?"
"U-Um…yes, I did," said Yuri, sweeping a strand of hair back over her ear. "I-I don't think I mentioned anything about that, though."
"No, you didn't," Monika said, looking back at the poem. "I could just tell."
Yuri blushed profusely at that. Monika stood up straight, walked over to where Yuri's feet had taken her, and handed the poem back.
"Well, whoever they are, I'm sure they're really going to like it!" said Monika with an oblivious smile.
Yuri sighed and looked at the poem, herself. "I don't know…"
Monika frowned sympathetically. "You never know when the opportunity might pass you by."
Yuri looked up confusedly. "What?"
"To read the poem, I mean," Monika said. "You know, it's the festival, everyone's eyes are on us…I know you said you were nervous, but this may actually be the best chance you ever get to share your poem with the world." Her gaze wandered to the clock overhead, and her smile faltered. "Your only chance."
A few moments passed in silence. Then:
"Do you really think…" Yuri said quietly, hesitantly. "That our friends would like it?"
"Yeah. I'm sure they would," Monika replied.
Yuri nodded, almost to herself. "Okay. Then, if it's not too much trouble…can I read out my poem before you go up?"
Monika chuckled and smiled – almost to herself. "Of course, Yuri. You can do whatever you want."
Yuri took a shaky breath and managed a small smile. "I don't just want to. I have to."
Monika's heart leapt up into her throat. "N-No, I wasn't trying to pressure you again – "
"It's okay," Yuri said plainly. "You're right. There will never be a better time to share my poem. And if I don't do it now, I'll wallow in doubt and solitude forever. So, I have to."
Yuri looked back at Monika and smiled, her eyes set and determined. "And I trust your judgement. If you believe that everyone will like it, then I can believe, too."
"Well…" Monika said, scratching the back of her head. "I-If you say so."
Yuri smiled warmly at Monika. "I do. Thank you very much for help. I'll go get ready, now."
"Sure," Monika replied. "Good luck! You're going to do great."
Yuri nodded, turned on her heel, and left the room, moving gracefully and quietly.
Taking a deep breath, Monika stretched her arms and turned back to the piano. Another rough road leading to a (presumably) positive ending. She just couldn't figure him out. Was it that hard to make her and her friends happy with no strings attached? He could write whatever he wanted, but he'd still gone out of his way to create conflict and tension before granting them resolution and happiness. He always had.
Why?
