They traveled for a long time before they came to back to where they had originally started.
"This looks familiar." Melisandria said, looking around.
"We're back where we started, and only in five days. Not bad, eh?" Varric remarked.
Behind them, Carver said, "Think we could... take a break? I feel... wrong."
Melisandria looked at her brother. He looked like he was going to be sick. "Let's make camp if you're sick."
Varric chuckled. "I'll wager it was those deep mushrooms we found."
Carver fell to his knees. "No, it's..."
Melisandria felt her heart drop. "Carver!" she cried as she ran to him. She held his head in her lap, trying to comfort him.
"It's the blight. I can sense it." Anders said, coming up to them.
"Just like that templar, Wesley." Carver said. "I'll be just as dead, just as gone."
Shaking her head, Melisandria said, "I won't let that happen, brother. There must be some other way!"
"I'm not going to make it. Not to the surface, not anywhere. It's getting worse."
Melisandria looked at Carver, seeing the same signs in him as there was in Wesley. She looked at Anders as he said that there might be something they could do.
"I stole the maps from a Warden that had come to Kirkwall. I wanted to know if he was looking for me." Anders explained. "He wasn't. The maps were for planning their own expedition into the Deep Roads."
Hopeful, Melisandria asked, "Does that mean the Grey Wardens are here?"
"If the Wardens are here, I know where. We could bring Carver to them..."
Melisandria looked at her little brother.
"And, what? Become a Grey Warden?" Carver asked.
"Is becoming a Grey Warden a cure, Anders?" Melisandria asked.
"Yes, I suppose it is," he replied. "But it's not without a price- one not everyone is willing to pay."
"What does that mean?" Melisandria asked, trying to get all of the facts. "What price? Maker's breath, Anders, spit it out!"
"The process of becoming a Warden is... unpleasant. And irreversible." he explained, then he looked at Melisandria. "It also means you might never see your brother again."
Melisandria looked at Carver. Her baby brother, dying from the blight, after having insisted on coming with her. What would her mother think? She had to do something, something to save Carver's life.
"He might survive the blight, but at the cost of becoming a Grey Warden." Anders continued. "It's not an easy life. Trust me."
"You got away from them, Anders. You're not a Grey Warden anymore." Melisandria pointed out.
"You think I got away?" he asked. "Eventually they or the Circle will drag me back. I've got no illusions about that."
"Is this even possible? How does someone become a Grey Warden?"
"I can't tell you. But it's not something you can undo once it's done... even if you want to."
Melisandria looked at Carver. He was getting worse and worse the longer they waited.
Carver tried to lighten the mood by saying, "This just keeps sounding better and better..."
"They might agree to it, however." Anders added. "That's if we can find them in time."
Melisandria nodded. "If there's even a chance, we must take it. I can't lose Carver, too."
"Then I hope I'm right." Anders said.
Melisandria helped Carver up and they followed Anders. They walked a ways before Anders stopped.
"Hmm." he said, looking around.
"What's wrong?" Melisandria asked.
"I think they're nearby." he replied. But at the sound of darkspawn, he pointed out the obvious. "Or it could be darkspawn."
"Great..." Melisandria muttered as she readied herself for an onslaught of darkspawn.
It was a small group of darkspawn that took no time to dispose of. As Anders killed off the last few, a group of people came walking up.
"Anders." one of them said.
"Fancy meeting you here, Stroud." Anders replied.
"I could say the same." Stroud added. He wore the garb of the Grey Wardens. "I thought you were through fighting darkspawn."
"I'm not here to fight darkspawn." Anders said. "I came looking for you." He looked over as Melisandria helped Carver over, his arm hoisted over her shoulder.
"You... mean the boy as a recruit?" Stroud asked. "Of course you do."
"We came down here for an expedition to find an ancient thaig. We were betrayed when an associate of ours locked us in a chamber. We were forced to find another way out of the thaig, but..." Melisandria started to explain, as she looked at her brother. "My brother got sick as we reached the entrance we used to get in here in the first place." She looked back at Stroud. "Please, messere, you must know something that can help him. Anything!"
"I'm sorry." Stroud said, shaking his head. "I know this comes as no comfort to you, but we do not recruit Grey Wardens out of pity. It is no kindness."
"You think it's kinder to let Carver, my baby brother, die from the blight?" Melisandria asked, bewildered.
"Sometimes it is, yes."
Melisandria looked at Anders, silently pleading with him.
He saw the desperation in her eyes and felt his heart sink. Melisandria Hawke had stood by him through everything since they met, always supporting him at every turn. He began to fall in love with her, but wasn't sure if she felt the same way about him nor did he have the courage to ask her- especially with the way she acted around Fenris. Anders knew that no matter what, for the sake of their friendship and everything she has done for him, he needed to convince Stroud to save Carver and make him a Grey Warden.
"Stroud, trust me when I say this one is worth your time." he said. "With the Blight over, you Wardens don't have recruits lining up." he added.
"This is no simple thing, Anders." Stroud pointed out. "This may be as much a death sentence as the sickness, and you know it."
"I don't care!" Melisandria cried. "He is my brother and if there is a way- even if it is a long shot- to save him, then I have to take it! I lost Bethany to an ogre when we had to fight our way out of Lothering during the Blight and I couldn't save her. Now I am begging you, Ser Stroud. Please! Save my brother!"
Anders himself was beginning to feel desperate. "He'll die anyway. Take him and try..." He looked at Melisandria. "I'm asking you."
Stroud sighed. "If the boy comes, he comes now, and you may not see him again. Being a Grey Warden is not a care. It is a calling."
"I don't care," Melisandria said, trying to be strong for her brother. "Carver has always said that he needed to find his calling, find his own way. He hates having to always protect me; the least I can do is give him the chance to find his way, make himself into the person he wants to be."
Carver looked at his big sister. "Are you sure about this?"
"Carver, I wish it hadn't worked out this way." Melisandria replied, trying to smile.
Stroud looked at his men. "We must move quickly if we are to make the surface in time." He came over to Melisandria and Carver and took Carver's other arm, wrapping it over his shoulder and taking him from her.
"Then... I guess this is it." Carver said to his sister. "Take care of Mother."
"I will, Carver, I swear to you I will." Melisandria said, her eyes brimming with tears.
Trying to swallow them, Melisandria stood up straight and pulled her arms in close to her chest as she watched her brother leave with the Grey Wardens. When they disappeared from sight, Melisandria and her companions made their way to the surface. Melisandria managed to find a large ogre skeleton along their path, so she grabbed the largest bone she could carry for Hammer and they continued on their way. When they found their way back through the entrance and along the Wounded Coast, they made their way to Kirkwall, coming in through Lowtown.
"Home, sweet home. Finally." Varric said, sounding relieved. "I wonder if Bartrand came back to the city. You think I'd be that lucky?"
Melisandria sighed, her heart heavy. "Revenge isn't exactly the most pressing thin on my mind right now."
"I know." Varric replied. "I'm... sorry about what happened to your brother."
Melisandria tried to smile to show her appreciation.
"He'll make it." Anders said, trying to be supportive. "Carver's stronger than he thinks."
"Thank you, Anders. I know how being in the Deep Roads must have been hard for you, let alone trying to find the very people you were avoiding just to help me." Melisandria said as she hugged him.
Anders returned her hug, squeezing her tightly to comfort her. He let her go when she pulled away and looked towards the Old City Slums where her uncle's home was.
"I should have seen Bartrand's betrayal coming. I'll find that maggot if it's the last thing I do." Varric said. "I imagine you'll be heading home to... tell the family?"
Melisandria nodded. "I don't have much choice."
"You'll be a wealthy woman, Hawke. It wasn't all for nothing." Varric added.
"If only Carver were here to share in the glory." Melisandria said as she turned and walked away, bidding her companions goodbye as she tried to hide the tears that were falling from her eyes.
Anders and Varric watched Melisandria sunder away, her shoulders heavy and her arms wrapped tightly around herself, her packs, her staff, and the ogre bone hanging on her back. They could see how upset she was, but there was nothing that they could do. They went on their way as she disappeared around a corner and veered off to their own path home.
Melisandria opened the door to her uncle's home and walked inside, preparing herself for the worse. Her mother and uncle turned when they heard the door open. Hammer came running up to her, prancing around her, glad to have her home. She presented him with the ogre bone as promised, but he set it down and started whining.
"Oh, my baby! You made it home!" Leandra said, running to her daughter, but her face fell when she didn't see Carver by Melisandria's side. "Carver isn't with you?"
Melisandria shook her head. "He got sick with the blight, much like Ser Wesley did. Anders knew where to find some Grey Wardens, though, so we sought them out and they took him in."
"Is he... coming back?" Leandra asked, tears brewing.
"I don't know." Melisandria replied. "But he is alive…"
Leandra couldn't contain herself any longer and fell to her knees weeping. She had lost her husband and now both of her youngest children, not knowing if Carver survived becoming a Grey Warden. Melisandria knelt next to her mother, pulling her into a hug and letting her cry. She could feel her own tears spilling over and down her cheeks. Gamlen felt helpless, his sister and his only niece both crying. He rubbed Leandra's back, trying to comfort her in a way that he wasn't sure would help. Hammer lifted his head and howled for Carver, a lonely and sorrowful howl.
The next few days went by quickly. The treasure they found in the Deep Roads made them a fortune and Melisandria was able to buy back her family's estate from the slavers. She moved her mother into her old home and soon after, Bodahn Fedic and his son, Sandal, approached her.
"Mistress Hawke, we wish to repay the debt that we owe you." Bodahn began. "We wish to repay this debt by serving you."
Melisandria was taken aback. "Bodahn, there's no need. I was happy to help you and your boy."
Bodahn shook his head. "But I owe you a debt for saving his life. This is how I wish to repay you."
Smiling, Melisandria nodded knowing that no matter what she said, Bodahn would insist. "Very well, Bodahn. Besides, I could use the help around the estate."
Bodahn thanked her many times over and soon he and Sandal had moved in as well. Melisandria gave them their own rooms, seeing as she had three extra. Sandal insisted on sharing a room with his father, though, so they ended up taking the largest of the three rooms available.
Things began to progress rather nicely for Melisandria and her family. She had built a name for herself and everyone knew who she was. Even Viscount Dumar was beginning to take notice. The viscount requested Melisandria's presence shortly after she returned. He had asked her to speak with the Qunari Arishok, as he had asked for her by name. This surprised Melisandria, because she never gave her name. It seemed as if the presence of the Qunari was unsettling- more so than before- and they were beginning to wear their "welcome" thin. He had asked what she had done, and she was honest with him. Viscount Dumar asked if she would be willing to appease the Arishok.
Accepting, Melisandria decided to check up on everyone. She visited Aveline first, as she was the nearest and her first companion.
"Aveline, you look well." She said when she arrived at her office.
Aveline turned and smiled. "Hawke, long time no see. I hear that congratulations are in order. Seems you really turned things around for yourself."
"Thanks, Aveline. Have things been well while I've been away?" Melisandria asked.
"Good as they ever will be." she replied.
They sat for a short time longer and caught up on things. The guard was nearly repaired from what was left of former Captain Jeven's mess. Melisandria bade her farewell and moved on to visit Fenris. She left the Keep, but as she made her way down the stairs, Bodahn ran up to her with news.
"Ah, messere there you are!" he said, panting. "If only you humans didn't all look the same."
"What is it, Bodahn?"
"Varric wanted me to give this to you." Bodahn said, handing Melisandria a very large and heavy coin purse. "This is your share from the treasure you found in the Deep Roads, after what you had already received to buy your estate. Varric felt as if you needed a little extra after what happened to your brother."
"Thank you for bringing this to me, Bodahn." Melisandria said.
"I wanted to thank you again, messere, for letting my boy and I stay with you."
"I didn't ask for you to be my manservant, Bodahn." Melisandria said.
"But I owe you a debt. And I will serve you faithfully." Bodahn replied.
"I know you will, Bodahn, and I appreciate all the help you have been since we met." Melisandria said with a smile.
Bodahn nodded and left Melisandria to her business. Melisandria knew she needed to thank Varric, so she decided to stop by the Hanged Man to see him and Isabela after she visited Fenris. Stretching her arms above her head, Melisandria breathed in and began her walk to Fenris' mansion.
It had been weeks since she had seen him. She came to a stop at his front door and looked at it. She felt nervous, but she opened the door and stepped inside. Fenris never seemed to feel the need to lock the door, as he was an incredibly capable warrior. She walked through the main entry room and up the stairs to see if he was in his chambers. The door was closed, so she knocked. When the door opened and Fenris saw Melisandria standing there, his eyes widened and he pulled her into his arms.
Melisandria gasped, but being in his arms again felt wonderful.
"You're back..." he said, breathing in her scent.
"I'm back..." she replied, taking in his.
They held each other for a few minutes before Fenris pushed her away and took a good look at her. She looked tired, a little thin, and like she had been through the Fade and back. She was a little pale from a lack of sun, but she looked well. Melisandria saw that Fenris looked about as tired as she felt, like he hadn't been able to sleep for a while.
"How was the expedition?" Fenris asked, offering her a seat.
She sat down and he sat next to her. "The expedition was a success." Melisandria said with a smile and put the coin purse on the seat next to them. "Varric sent this over earlier. It's a part of my share from what we found."
Fenris picked it up and felt the weight of it. "That is quite the success, I gather."
"There was enough to buy back my family's estate and give my mother back her home." Melisandria added, relief in her tone.
"I'm happy for you." Fenris said, but he saw Melisandria's face fall. "What is it?"
"I... it's nothing..." Melisandria told him. "Carver caught the Blight and Anders, fortunately, knew where a group of Grey Wardens were. We took Carver to them and after some convincing and pleading, they took him in. I still haven't heard any news as to whether he survived or not."
"He may have survived, Mel, do not give up hope just yet."
"But I don't know when or where I will see him again; I may even never get to see him again." Melisandria replied, trying not to cry.
Fenris sighed, not knowing what to do or what to say. He could see how worried and upset Melisandria was, so he put a hand on hers and tried to be positive for her.
Trying to make a better mood for their conversation, Melisandria looked at him. "Enough about me, then. How have you been?"
"I have been well, considering. It has been three years and still no sign of Danarius. I wonder if he has given up." he replied, sounding almost disappointed.
"Hopefully he has, but isn't this what you wanted?" Melisandria asked him.
"Yes, but what am I to do now?" Fenris asked. "What do you do when you stop running?"
"You build a life, Fenris. Start over." Melisandria offered. "Find a way to move on with your life."
"I don't know how." Fenris said, standing. "My first memories are from receiving these markings, whatever life I had before it's gone." He looked at Melisandria, knowing she was just trying to help. "I shouldn't be troubling you with my issues, they are not your problems."
"They could be." Melisandria said with a smile. "Or, maybe I can give you a few more."
Smirking, Fenris replied, "Only a few?"
"The good kind." she added. "Fenris, we're friends. Whatever I can do for you, I want to do because I care about you. You're my companion, my friend, my ally- I would do anything for you."
"You're a beautiful woman, Melisandria Hawke." Fenris said, a hand to her cheek.
"You think I'm beautiful?" Melisandria asked, slightly taken aback.
"You know I do not like repeating myself." Fenris said with a smile. Then he began to wonder. "Has no one else gotten your attention?"
Melisandria smiled. "Do you see anyone else here?"
Fenris let his hand fall as he turned away, a sudden look of sadness on his face. "I'm an escaped slave and an elf, living in a borrowed mansion. None of these things bother you?"
Melisandria touched his shoulder. "Fenris, I'm a refugee and a mage, hiding behind a title and wealth to keep out of sight of the Templars. Does that not bother you?"
Fenris looked at her. She was being honest and trying to cheer him up. "You raise an interesting point," he replied with a smile returning to his face. "I will have to consider it."
Melisandria smiled. "Take all the time you need, Fenris." She kissed his cheek before she turned to let herself out. "I will be waiting for your answer. I need to go check up on the others, but if you have need of me, come find me at the estate."
And with that, Melisandria Hawke left Fenris in his chambers and left his mansion. She was beginning to see signs of the same spark she had seen the night in the moon flower clearing. She felt a small flushing burn on her cheeks as she thought about that night, remembering the kiss Fenris had given her.
Melisandria kept walking through the streets of Hightown and stopped by her home. She walked inside and felt safe. As she proceeded up the stairs to her room, she went over to Sandal. He handed her a rune, the same one he had shown her in the Deep Roads when she found him in the middle of dead darkspawn and a frozen ogre.
"Boom." was all he said.
"There he goes again." Bodahn said as he came up. "He's always making these runes, though I have no idea how. It's just his gift."
"Has he always been this way?" Melisandria asked.
"For as long as I can remember."
"Does it run in your family?"
Bodahn sighed. "No, but to be honest, Mistress, Sandal isn't even my son by blood. I found him wandering around, all alone, in the Deep Roads. I looked for family, anyone who might miss him, but there was no one. So I took him in and raised him as my own."
Melisandria smiled. "He is lucky to have you as a father, Bodahn. Blood or not, you took him in and raised him, giving him the love a father would to his son. You protect him, care for him, and that's what make you his family."
"Thank you, messere. I shudder to think, though, what will happen to him when I pass." Bodahn said.
"I will promise you this, Bodahn," Melisandria said. "I will take care of Sandal no matter what. You and your boy are part of my family now and I look after my family. You have nothing to fear."
Bodahn again thanked her many times over and Sandal left for the kitchen, saying he wanted pie. Melisandria chuckled at that and went to find her mother.
"It's so nice to be home again, to feel like an Amell." Leandra said when she found her near the fireplace.
"Mother, you deserve to be here again. I'm not only going to restore the Amell family name, but I am going to make the name Hawke one to be proud of." Melisandria said.
"I know you will, dear. I will have to get used to living here again. Maybe I should even find you a suitable husband." Leandra said with a smile and wandered off.
Smiling, Melisandria asked if Hammer wanted to go for a walk and left the estate with her mabari at her side. Melisandria remembered the day when Hammer had chosen her.
Bethany was home sick, having eaten some deep mushrooms she found in the forest nearby, but Melisandria and Carver were out playing one day and they came across a barn where a local man was breeding mabari. He knew the children well and asked if they wanted to have a look at the pups. Excited, they eagerly said yes and the breeder took them to a stall in the barn near the end where a mother mabari and her six pups were staying. The mother watched as her pups chased after one another, seeming content. She looked up when she saw the man bring Melisandria and Carver into the stall. Looking over them, the mother mabari seemed to nod in approval as the man asked if they could pet the pups.
Carver and Melisandria couldn't have been more than ten and twelve at the time. They were ecstatic as the pups came up and played with them, their mother keeping a watchful eye. When it was time to go, Carver and Melisandria said goodbye to the mabari and her pups, thanking the man for letting them play. As they walked back home, the man yelled stop and as the siblings turned, they saw one of the pups running towards them, carrying a hammer. They watched as the pup stopped right in front of them, staring for a moment before it came over and placed the hammer at Melisandria's feet. He barked at her, wagged his nubby tail, and danced in circles around her. When the man finally caught up, he recognized the mabari pup's actions and smiled.
"Well, little Mel, it looks like this one likes you. He seems to have imprinted on you."
"You want to come with me, boy?" the young Melisandria asked the pup, squatting in front of him.
The pup barked and lunged at her, licking her face over and over again.
"He's your mabari now, Mel." the man said as he came up to them. Handing her a collar, he helped her up and said, "This mabari will follow you no matter where you go. He has imprinted on you which means that you are his human and he is your mabari."
Mel took the collar and buckled it around the pup's neck. "There we go, boy."
The pup licked her and they were off, waving goodbye to the breeder. As they walked home, Carver began to pout.
"What's wrong, Carver?" Melisandria asked.
"You got a mabari and I didn't!" he said, clearly jealous.
"Well, I didn't choose to be imprinted on, Carver. I just got lucky. Maybe you'll get a mabari soon, too!" Melisandria said, trying to cheer him up.
"But it's not fair! I deserve to have a mabari more than you do! You're a stupid mage and I am going to grow up to be the best warrior that anyone has ever seen!" Carver cried and ran off.
Melisandria called out to him, but he ignored her and ran all the way home. Looking at her new mabari companion, she sighed. "Why did you choose me, little one? Am I that more worthy than my brother?"
The mabari seemed to nod and barked. Smiling, Melisandria rubbed the pup's ears. "We need to think of a name for you, boy." she said as they continued back home.
When she reached her house, her father was waiting outside for her. "What happened? Carver came in crying and won't tell us anything." Malcolm said.
"Papa, when we were playing, we met the mabari breeder and he let us see the pups." Melisandria replied, the pup coming to a stop next to her. "When we left to come home, this little pup came after us and the breeder man said that he had imprinted on me. This mabari pup is mine, just as I am his."
Malcolm looked at his daughter, seeing the truth in her eyes. "So Carver is simply jealous?"
"I guess so... Papa, he seemed angry at me, like he hates me for being a mage..." Melisandria said.
Malcolm came over to his daughter and pulled her into a hug. "My dear sweet little flower. Your brother is not like you or Bethany. He does not possess magik. He does not hate you, nor does he hate Bethany or I for being mages. I think he is either jealous or he grows tired of us having to hide so often. Carver is a free spirit that needs to be able to spread his wings and fly, but he can't do that if he's always protecting you and your sister. You have to understand that and know that one day, he will choose a path that you cannot follow him on and he will no longer protect you as he does now."
"I understand, Papa. I have to become strong and brave like you so that Carver doesn't have to protect me, right?"
Malcolm looked into his daughter's elfroot green eyes and smiled, "If that is what you want to set as your goal, then go for it. I just want you to understand that you have a gift- though it may seem a curse at times- and that you have to learn for yourself how to control your magik, discover how you want to use your magik, and understand the limitations and the dangers that magik possesses. While magik is a beautiful thing and a gift from the Maker, I want you to realize that because there are bad mages out there who use blood magik and consort with demons, those who are not mages will fear you and fear what you could become if you resort to the foul dark magiks."
Smiling, Malcolm stood and looked at the pup. "So, have you thought of a name for the lad?"
The pup looked at Melisandria, as if he was waiting to be given a name. Melisandria thought long and hard on her way home and smiled at her father. Thinking of the hammer that he had brought to her, Melisandria spoke with a clear voice, "His name is Hammer."
From then on, Hammer had lived up to his name as he seemed to have a knack for running into things head on, literally, and often was uninjured after he head-butted things. There was one time that Melisandria had been cornered by some bullies, but before she used her magik-risking exposing her and her whole family to the village of Lothering- Hammer came to her rescue, head-butting and gnashing his teeth at the boys. In order to thank him for saving her and for saving her from a huge mistake that would affect everyone in her family, Melisandria went to the smithy and asked to learn some of the skills of a blacksmith. It took a few days, but she was an incredibly quick learner and had managed to fashion a medallion of sorts for Hammer. It bore a runic hammer with the symbols of strength, courage, and loyalty etched into the silver around the hammer. She presented it to Hammer, letting him take a look at it. Approving, he barked and sat with his head high. Melisandria smiled and fastened the medallion to his collar, then hugged him.
As Melisandria came back from her memories, she felt tears in her eyes as she had also remembered the times she and Carver had spent together, with Bethany, too. She missed her twin siblings, feeling as if it were all her fault that things happened the way that they had. She knew that nothing could have stopped them from happening, and that she had to let things run their course and hope for the best. She walked through the streets of Hightown and made her way into Darktown. She wanted to thank Anders again for what he had done for her and Carver, and for helping with the expedition.
She said a quick hello to Tomwise the Poison Maker and made her way to the clinic. When she opened the door, Anders was pacing a little as he read a rather large book, his back to the door. Smiling, she decided to sneak up on him and surprise him. There wasn't anyone around at that moment, so Melisandria assumed there were no patients or that Anders' assistants were gathering some herbs for him. As she came up behind him, he stopped for a moment, murmuring something to himself. Reaching up on her tip toes- as she was a head shorter than Anders- she placed her hands on Anders eyes, making him jump.
Anders dropped the book and spun, throwing a blast of spirit energy at her. She caught it, but the force of the blast pushed her back a ways, nearly knocking her off her feet. When Anders saw her standing there, holding the ball of spirit energy in between her hands, he stared in awe and then immediately realized what he had just done.
"Hawke! I am so sorry! Are you hurt?" he said, rushing to her as she breathed in and absorbed the energy slowly into her body.
"Anders, I'm fine. I thought I could surprise you, but I guess Justice gave you an extra edge when people sneak up behind you." she said with a smile. Rubbing the back of her head, she giggled in embarrassment. "I must apologize, I did not mean to startle you so. And don't call me Hawke, it's too formal. Call me Mel like everyone else does."
Anders sighed in relief and rubbed his temples. "Don't sneak up on me like that."
"Sorry, I just wanted to come and thank you for everything you did for me and my brother in the Deep Roads. I know it was hard for you to go back, but I appreciate it." Melisandria said.
"It was my pleasure. You were there for me when I needed someone after what happened to Karl. I could never have asked for a better friend, but I'm serious. Don't sneak up on me. I don't ever want to hurt you. And with the Templars nearly at my door..."
"Were they after you?" Melisandria asked, suddenly feeling the mood of their conversation changing.
"They were only checking out the refugees, but it's only a matter of time before they discover what I am doing here." Anders replied.
"You shouldn't tell me these things, Anders," Melisandria said, chuckling, "I might just have to lock you up, to keep them off you."
"Sweetheart, I'm not letting anyone lock me up, you included." Anders replied with a warm smile, but then the smile faded. "The Knight-Commander is out of control. Even her own people have been talking about it. The curfews, the midnight raids of mages' families. Everyone I know forced into hiding so they won't be made Tranquil."
"Is that making it harder for you?" Melisandria asked. "With Justice, I mean."
"In the Fade, there is no time. Emotion rules everything." Anders replied. "Justice doesn't know how to sit idle until the right moment to strike, and I can't say that I have any greater patience. I fear what my anger has made of my friend."
"Anders, you chose to work with him. Only you can make it work." Melisandria pointed out.
"I am trying," Anders replied. "I have not attacked the Templars openly. I help the mages here as best as I can, but this impasse cannot last. You're at as much risk as I am, Mel." Melisandria watched his face fall. "That's when I worry. What if your money and position aren't enough? What if the Knight-Commander turns on you? Everything I have done to control this, I don't care. I would drown us in blood to keep you safe."
Placing a hand on Anders cheek, Melisandria looked up at him with a warm smile, trying to reassure him. "Anders, I don't want to see you lose yourself, whether it's to you or to Justice. You have to stay in control."
"There will be more violence," Anders said as he put his hand on hers, feeling the comfort of her warmth on his cheek. "I know that. If you tie yourself to me, I will only hurt you."
"You keep saying that, Anders, but you haven't yet. I know you are a good man, a strong man. I don't believe that you could ever truly hurt anyone, especially me."
Pulling away from her, Anders backed away. "You don't want to do this, Mel. I don't have any control around you. You saw what I did to you when you only surprised me. I can't risk hurting you." He looked at her, a longing and aching look in his eyes. "I never thought I would meet another mage like you, another apostate. Don't tempt me, not unless you're ready for what that means."
Anders turned around and walked away, leaving Melisandria standing there, unsure of what to do. Hammer whined a bit at Melisandria's side. As she turned to walk out of the clinic, she said, "Anders, no matter what happens, no matter what goes wrong, I will always be here for you. You are one of my best friends and I will never turn my back on you. This much I can promise you."
And with that, Melisandria left the clinic with Hammer at her side. Anders turned and watched as she left, closing the door behind her. Anders felt like such a fool, but he had to warn her against himself and against Justice. There was no telling what would happen if he did lose control around her; Anders wouldn't be able to bear it if something happened to Melisandria. Alone with his thoughts, Anders began to wonder what Melisandria truly meant to him, and tried to understand the meaning of her words.
As Anders mulled things over in his head, Melisandria made her way out of Darktown and into the streets of Lowtown. She stopped by the Hanged Man to see Varric and Isabela. They were sitting at a table together, swapping stories and sharing a few laughs. When they saw Melisandria come up, they offered her a seat and called Nora over with a pint.
"So how are you enjoying to noble lifestyle, Hawke?" Varric said as Melisandria sat down. "You bored of it yet?"
Chuckling, Melisandria accepted the pint from Nora and took a swig before answering. "Not quite, Varric. It's going to take some time to get used to it, but at least Mother is happy."
"Any plans for the future yet?"
Shaking her head, Melisandria replied, "Just trying to take care of my family."
"That's probably a good idea, considering what happened in the Deep Roads with your brother." Varric said. "I'm sorry about what happened, Hawke."
"There was nothing that could have been done. I'm just glad that Anders was there, otherwise, I would have lost Carver for sure."
Varric saw the doubt in her eyes. "Still no news of Carver, yet?"
Shaking her head, Melisandria said, "No, and it's been weeks. It shouldn't take this long to hear any news from Fereldan."
Standing, Varric put a hand on Melisandria's shoulder. "Keep your hopes up, Hawke, news will come soon enough."
As he went to his room, Isabela put a hand on Melisandria's. "I know I'm not very good at this kind of thing, but I am sorry about your brother. I rather enjoyed Carver's company." Melisandria managed a smile and Isabela raised her mug. "There we go, Mel. Now drink up, you look like you need it."
Melisandria shook her head in amusement and drank. She sat there with Isabela for a while, drinking and catching up, joking around and sharing laughs. She and Isabela had grown very close, despite their near polar opposite personalities.
"I am glad to have met you, Mel, I really am." Isabela said.
"And I you, Isabela. Have you had any luck with the relic?" Melisandria replied.
"As a matter of fact, I have. I've been following a lead. I'm sooo close that I can taste it!" Isabela said, excited.
Laughing, Melisandria replied, "Are you sure? Last time you said that we went looking for a stash that contained several badly written poems and an old boot!"
"It could have contained the relic." Isabela said, chuckling. "I just wanted to let you know that I might soon be taking you up on that offer to help."
"Do I get a kiss from the feisty temptress when I present her with the hard won prize?" Melisandria said, flirting a little bit with Isabela, maybe because she had too much to drink.
Smirking, Isabela replied, "If you want. I'll even let you choose where I plant it."
They looked at each other for a moment and then started to laugh, having finally decided that they had had enough to drink. Melisandria said her goodbyes for the moment and left the Hanged Man, noticing that it had gotten dark. With Hammer still at her side, she began to walk home, stumbling a bit.
As she walked home, Fenris came around the corner and saw her. Coming up to her, he noticed that she was a little bit drunk.
"Your mother was worried, Mel. She came to the mansion asking where you were. I came to find you, to make sure you were OK." he said.
Mel smiled, feeling a little hot from the whiskey she had drank. "I was just drinking with Varric and Isabela." she said as she looped her arm around Fenris'. "Mother worries too much sometimes."
Fenris smiled, having never seen Melisandria drunk before. "Let's get you home."
They walked for a bit and at some point between the path leading to Darktown and the path leading to Hightown, Melisandria stood up straight, stretched and smiled at Fenris.
"That's better," she said as she glowed a bit for a brief second.
"What?" Fenris asked, confused.
"Oh, my magik is strange. Whenever there is an unusual substance in my body- for this instance alcohol- my magik isolates it and neutralizes it. That's why I am never sick or drunk." she explained.
"That seems like it is quite handy." Fenris replied.
"It can be, but most of the time, it can be rather annoying. Sometimes I wish I could get sick or stay drunk long enough to understand what my brother and sister went through." Fenris looked at Melisandria as she stared up at the moon. "I appreciate you coming to look for me, Fenris. I know how much Mother worries, so thank you." she said, smiling at him.
"It is my pleasure." he replied, returning her smile.
They walked up through the streets of Hightown and stopped at the door of the Hawke estate. Looking at Fenris, with his dark green eyes and white hair glistening in the moonlight, Melisandria asked if he wanted to come inside.
"Perhaps another night," he said.
"At least let Mother thank you?" Melisandria said.
Fenris nodded. "Very well,"
"Thank you, Fenris."
Fenris sighed in friendly defeat as he felt as if his heart melted at her smile. He had kept it closed to so many others, but the moment he met Melisandria, the ice that seemed to cover his heart began to melt and he had once more began to feel safe. He followed her inside, Hammer trotting ahead of them. Leandra was sitting near the fireplace in the library, watching the flames dance.
"Mother, I'm home." Melisandria said, coming into the room.
"Melisandria Helen Hawke, where in the Maker's name were you? You left without saying anything and have been gone for hours. I was so worried I had to find your friend here to ask where you were. Not even he knew!" Leandra said, using her motherly but furious voice.
Melisandria cringed a little at the sound of her full name being used. "Mother, I'm a grown woman. I'm twenty-two now, I can go wherever and do whatever I please."
"I know, dear, I was just so worried." Leandra said, suddenly seeming sad. "With no word yet of Carver and losing Bethany and your father, I always think the worst when I don't know what's going on."
"Oh, Mother..." Melisandria said, "Let's take you upstairs. It's late."
Fenris waited while Melisandria started to take her mother upstairs. As they reached the halfway point, Leandra turned and smiled at Fenris as she thanked him for bringing Melisandria home. Fenris put a hand to his chest and bowed slightly before Melisandria and Leandra continued upstairs. When Leandra was settled into her bed, Melisandria closed the door and headed back downstairs.
Fenris had moved to stand by the fireplace and turned when Melisandria came up behind him. "Is your mother alright?"
"Yes, she worries too much sometimes, and I fear it will one day lead to something awful." Melisandria said, worry in her voice.
Fenris put a hand on her shoulder. "Your mother is doing what she does best. She is merely trying to ensure your safety as best as she can."
Melisandria put a hand on his and smiled softly. "I know, but I worry about her just as much."
Fenris pulled her in for a hug, holding her close. "You should not worry so, it makes you look older." he said with a chuckle.
Melisandria played along as if she was offended, lightly smacking him. "You're mean." she replied with a giggle.
Fenris smiled, glad to see her mood lightened. "I should leave," he said. "It is getting late."
Melisandria blushed as she looked away for a moment. "You could stay."
Fenris lifted her chin and looked at her. "Perhaps on another evening. You need to rest. I shall see you tomorrow."
Melisandria nodded and walked him to the door. "Good night, Fenris."
"Good night, Melisandria Helen Hawke." Fenris replied with a smile.
Hearing him say her full name like that made her face burn. She felt the blush deepen when he kissed her forehead before he left the Hawke Estate. Closing the door behind him, Melisandria felt her heart pounding. Putting her hands to face, Melisandria started to sing to herself as she moved up the stairs to her room. She got herself ready for bed and slipped underneath her covers as Hammer came to lay in bed with her. Quickly falling asleep, Melisandria began to dream of happier times with her family, but they soon turned to nightmares again.