A/N: I can't control myself. It's a real problem. If you are hoping that I can maintain this updating schedule, you may be as crazy as I am! All jokes aside, I am enjoying the writing process and your encouragement SO much! This is a much different story than Hear Me, and the response has been so kind, aside from a very lovely troll who was much more inspirational than they could have ever imagined. Maybe next time spell the word "pedestal" correctly if you want to be taken seriously, though. But what do I know, right? I'm just a dumb Laxus apologist.
For the rest of you, I hope you enjoy Part III. It's about to get introspective af
Part III: Awakening
The room was silent as she walked in, her breath echoing in her own ears. She surveyed the room to delay the inevitable. It was as organized as ever, the chaos from Freed and Bickslow's harried emergency care nowhere to be found. She was thankful. It would take her long enough to get over the terror of watching Laxus writhe on the infirmary bed without being confronted with the evidence again. A breeze from the open windows ruffled the drapes, and the last traces of daylight bathed everything in a warm, golden glow.
Finally, she allowed herself to look at the figure on the bed. For the first time that day, Laxus was peaceful. His chest rose and fell at regular intervals—the only indication that he'd pulled through. She crept closer, both intrigued and afraid of his stillness. A chair sat by the side of the bed, and Lucy folded herself into it, her eyes never leaving the man before her.
The thick, ropey lines underneath his skin had receded, but faint blue lines still lurked around his neck and shoulders. She figured that was what Wendy had meant by not having been able to remove all of the venom in one sitting. The covers were pulled up to his chest, hiding the wound left by the serket's stinger. If not for the dull patterns still imprinted on his skin, he could only be sleeping.
He looked so young, despite the fact that his feet nearly hung off the bed. Her mind flashed back to his smile when they'd danced last night-it seemed so long ago now. The youth of his face had been undeniable then. This felt like a poor imitation. His eyebrows were relaxed and his jaw unclenched, but there was no life, none of the man who'd teased her one moment and shuffled away, embarrassed, the next.
Against her better judgment, she reached out a hand to rest against his shoulder. She held her breath, hoping she didn't disturb him, but needed to feel him-to confirm that his wasn't some cruel trick being played on them all. Maybe that would make it real.
He didn't stir.
With a single finger, she traced the fading lines on his skin, tracing a vein that snaked around the ball of his shoulder and up his neck. She stopped when she got to his face, not wanting to push her luck. Sighing, she pulled her hand back and laid it in her lap. It felt wrong to sit here and stare at him. People had done that at her mother's wake all those years ago. They just sat and waited, not saying a word. She'd never felt more alone then.
This is different, she told herself. Laxus is alive.
"Hey," she breathed quietly, breaking the silence that sat heavy in the room. What were you supposed to say to an unconscious person, much less one you barely knew? She tried again.
"You had us all worried there for a minute," she breathed, leaning in closer. "But we shouldn't have been, should we?"
She half expected a sarcastic remark in the affirmative, but he still laid there, unmoving before her.
"It was stupid of you to do something like that. Brave, but stupid." She laughed then, a quiet sound that barely passed her teeth. "But I can't blame you. I think I would have done the same thing in your position. Just…don't scare us like that again, alright? If…if you hadn't made it. I'm not sure what any of us would have done," she said, surprised by the truth in her words. If he had died, she knew deep in her bones that he would have left a hole in the world that nothing could fill.
She took one of his hands in hers, startled by how cold it was.
"Just please get better soon," she pleaded with him, rubbing circles on the back of his hand. "We all need you. Your team need you and I—" she stopped, paranoid that he might be able to hear her somewhere in there. However, she swallowed and went on. He was asleep. She might as well say what she was thinking.
"I think I need you, too."
She lingered for several more minutes, watching the even rhythm of his breathing. After a time, she patted his hand and rose. Lucy left him with a promise to visit him again the next day, and she exited with a soft sigh.
Days passed, and Laxus didn't wake. She tried to keep her spirits up, to remind herself that Laxus' strength would serve him well. She had to believe that he would wake up- and be the man they all remembered when he did.
Every day, after she was sure the Thunder Legion and his grandfather had time to sit with him, she'd slink into the infirmary to talk to him. For hours, she'd keep him company, though she figured it was more for her benefit than his. When she ran out of encouragements for him to get well, she moved on to updating him about the guild. How Nab was finally zeroing in on his perfect job and how Mira was compiling a new dinner menu to unveil next month. She talked about how much the Thunder Legion missed him and how Master grew more concerned every day that he didn't wake up, despite Wendy's assurances that he would recover on his own time.
She talked about herself. Embarrassed at first, she quickly found herself telling him things she hadn't told anyone. Maybe it was the fact that he could offer no judgments while unconscious, but she felt lighter every time she told him about her mother and how much she missed her. How much she'd hated her father for what he'd done to her and her guild, but how she regretted waiting so long to reconcile. Now, she'd never have the chance to.
"I didn't think I'd miss him at the time, you know? I would have given anything to never see him again, even after chasing him all the way to Acalypha. Can you believe he had the nerve to ask me for money?" she laughed, shaking her head.
"And then Tenrou Island happened. By the way, I never thanked you for that, did I? We would have been goners if you hadn't shown up out of nowhere. One of these days, you'll have to tell me how you managed that," she said to his still form.
"I never thought that seven years would change so much. Coming home felt like going to Edolas. Everyone was the same, but not. When I got the news about my dad, I couldn't feel anything at first. But then I went home and saw that he'd sent a present for me on every birthday that I'd been gone. Not once did he give up hope. In the last letter he sent, he told me how much he loved me." Tears filled her eyes, but she blinked them away. She didn't think she still had the tears left, but still they came. "I had my dad back in that letter, but I never got the chance to tell him that I loved him, too. He died with the hope that I was still out there somewhere."
She scrubbed her face with her hands, glad she'd forgone mascara that day. Fanning her face, she couldn't help but laugh at herself.
"I'm such a mess, aren't I? Pretty pathetic, huh?"
She sniffed, once again thankful that no one could see her puffy eyes and reddened face.
"But if my dad's letter gave me anything, if Fairy Tail has taught me anything, it's that I can't ever give up hope. I won't let that faith be in vain, so I know you'll wake up. Maybe then you can make fun of me for being so ridiculous," she joked, extending a hand to brush a lock of hair off his forehead. His hair was softer than she imagined, and she combed her fingers through it.
A knock at the door made her snatch her hand back and straighten in her chair. The door opened and Wendy peaked around, a small smile on her face.
"Is it okay if I come check on him?" she asked.
"Of course!" Lucy said, getting up. "Don't let me get in your way. I'm sure someone else wants to sit with him for a while, anyway."
Wendy's smile pulled down at the corners. "You don't have to leave. I'll only be a minute."
She shook her head. "I've been hogging him enough." Turning back to Laxus, she patted him on the shoulder. "I'll see you later," she promised. She turned to go, letting Wendy work her magic.
Raucous voices and the dull roar of conversation greeted her as she stepped into the main hall. The difference in volume made her jump, and she figured Freed or Levy must have placed runes around the infirmary to dull the sound. She smiled at their consideration.
She spotted her team sitting at a nearby table, and with a wave, she went to join them. Natsu and Happy sat eating, the plates stacking up in an unstable pile beside them. Gray and Erza, deep in conversation, looked up as she approached.
"Hey, Luce!" Natsu greeted around a mouthful of mashed potatoes.
She grimaced. "Hey, guys. What's up?"
"Not much. We were thinking about taking a job," Gray said, his fingers playing with the buttons on his shirt. "You in?"
Lucy sat down at the table, but shrugged. "I need the cash, but I'm not sure if I'm up for it," she said.
Erza frowned. "Why not?"
"I just…don't know if I'd be able to stay focused."
Gray smiled, one side of his mouth pulling up higher than the other. "Laxus will be fine if you're gone for a day, Lucy."
Her face flushed and she shook her head. "This isn't about Laxus!"
"Isn't it, though? You've spent as much time with him as his team has. I didn't realize you were so close," Erza said.
"We're not," Lucy said, feeling uncomfortable with her line of questioning. She hoped that would be the end of it, but with a single arched eyebrow on Erza's part, she found herself spilling the beans. "We're not close. We've only really talked once, but I still feel like I should be here. I don't know why. It's not like he needs me or anything, and I know it sounds crazy," she said, tilting her head so her hair covered her face. She couldn't believe she was admitting this out loud, much less in front of Natsu and Gray. "But I feel like I see a lot of myself in him."
Gray's brow furrowed, and it took less than five seconds for Natsu and Happy to burst into laughter.
"Oh, gosh, Lucy, that's hilarious!" he wheezed, spewing chunks of food everywhere. Gray hissed and leaned out of the line of fire.
"I'm not sure what's so funny about it," she grumbled.
"I mean, it's Laxus," Gray said, shrugging, as if that answered her question. "Guy doesn't say anything if he can't grunt it out. He's about as emotional as a doornail. I mean, I respect the guy, sure, but I wouldn't say he's anything like you."
"They both have yellow hair," Happy added from his perch on Natsu's shoulder.
"That's true," Natsu agreed. "Maybe Lucy does his hair up in pigtails when she visits him," he sniggered. "They'd have more in common that way."
Lucy glared. "Shut up, Natsu."
"Come on, Lucy, lighten up," he said, leaning over the table so he could playfully swat at her arm.
"Not this time," she said, not letting up the harsh look on her face. "He nearly died. The least you could do is show a little compassion."
Natsu blinked in confusion. "Laxus is gonna be fine. He always is."
That was it. Lucy rose out of her chair, sending in screeching behind her. She leaned over the table to get in Natsu's face. "You weren't there to see how close he came to not being fine. You'd be singing a different tune if you knew how worried we all were while you were off having fun. This is someone's life we're talking about. How would you feel if that was Happy in there, or any one of us? Don't you remember what happened to future me in Crocus? How awful you felt?" She knew she was hitting below the belt, for when she mentioned the other Lucy's death, his expression crumbled and he broke their gaze to stare at the tabletop.
"You're right," he admitted, his tone contrite. "I'm sorry."
She nodded and sat back down, still feeling a little high strung.
Gray threw an arm around her shoulder. "Cut him some slack, Lucy. It was hard for us all to imagine Laxus needing any help at all. It's not something that any of us thought could happen."
Lucy sighed. "I know, but it did happen."
"We will try to be more sensitive in the future," Erza promised. "I'm sure Laxus will appreciate such loyalty when he awakens."
Some of Lucy's earlier embarrassment flared back to life, her face pinkening.
"In any case, I agree that it would be prudent for you to stay here," Erza said. "It's clear that your first priority is ensuring that Laxus is adequately taken care of. It would be selfish of us to expect you to abandon your post."
Lucy smiled at her friend. "Thanks, Erza. I promise I'll go on the next one."
"It won't be the same without you," Gray said.
"I'm sure you'll survive," she said, laughing.
Gray smirked. "That's what you think. Trying to wrangle Captain Pyro is a job in of itself. I'm not sure how we'll do it without you."
"Hey! Watch your mouth, Ice Princess," Natsu warned.
"What are you going to do about it?"
"I'll show you what I'll do about it!"
"Boys," Erza said, and though her tone was low, they immediately settled, turning to face her with huge smiles and frightened eyes. "That's better. Natsu, it's your turn to choose the mission. Choose wisely."
"Aye, sir!" he and Happy cried in unison, saluting. "Maybe we can take the sea monster mission that Lucy refused to go on last week!" In seconds, they ran to the mission board, snatched a flyer off it, and ran back to the table, displaying it to the group with identical smiles.
Erza leaned in to inspect the poster and nodded. "This is suitable. Do you have any objections, Gray?"
"Other than it was Natsu who picked it out? Nah," he said.
"Then go get approval from Mira, Natsu, and we'll be off."
Erza looked back at Lucy. "You'll alert us if anything should happen while we're away?"
Lucy smiled and nodded. "Absolutely. Make sure you guys stay safe."
"Tell that to Natsu," Gray quipped, waving a hand in the direction Natsu and Happy had gone.
She supposed that was good enough.
Rolling her eyes, she drew each of them into a hug, and did the same with Happy and Natsu after they came back from the bar. She held her embrace with Natsu as the rest of the team made their way out. When she pulled back, she couldn't help the wave of affection that swelled within her at his contrite expression.
"I really am sorry, Luce," he said, rubbing the back of his head. "I didn't mean to make you angry. I guess I didn't really want to think about what could have happened, either."
She hugged him again. "I know. I shouldn't have overreacted, either. We'll call it even if you promise to be careful."
Natsu threw his head back with a wide smile. "You got it."
"And don't set anything unnecessary on fire."
"Oh, come on, Luce!"
"Those are my conditions," she said, narrowing her eyes.
His shoulders heaved with an exaggerated sigh. "Fine. But only if you promise to take care of yourself, too."
She smiled at him, grateful for her dearest friend. Even when he said thoughtless things that flared her temper, she couldn't ask for a better person in her life. "Deal," she said, holding out her hand to shake.
Natsu's smile grew even wider, exposing his pointed canine teeth. Spitting into his hand, he slapped it against hers in a firm grip. She wrenched her hand back violently, stumbling back from the force.
"Natsu! That's disgusting! That's it, get out of here!" She snapped, pointing at the door.
His only response was a laugh and a quick wave as he did as she commanded. She watched him follow their teammates, her lips twitching in her struggle to maintain her stern expression. While relieved she wouldn't have to help slay the sea monster causing mischief off the coast of Hargeon—the thing spewed acid, no way was she having any part of it—she was sad that she'd given up time with her friends. They were truly like no other. When they had gone, she let her eyes trail back to the infirmary.
She didn't regret spending time with Laxus, but she'd let her friendships fall by the wayside during her constant vigil. Nothing could be done about her team for the moment, but they weren't the only ones she'd been neglecting. Looking around the guild, her eyes fell on Levy, seated at a table in the corner next to Gajeel while Jet and Droy looked on in envy.
"Hey, Levy!" she called out, walking over to her friend.
"Hey, girl!" Levy answered with a smile.
She came to a stop at the table, nodding hello to Gajeel and Pantherlily. "I just wanted to see if you were free tonight? I finished another chapter of my book a few weeks ago, and you're welcome to come over and read it."
Levy's eyes lit up. "For real? Awesome!" She struggled out of Gajeel's hold so she could stand up. "I can drop by later. We can make a sleepover out of it."
"Awesome!" Lucy smiled back, encouraged by her enthusiasm. "I guess I should actually go grocery shopping, then. Natsu cleaned me out last time he came over. Do you still like those spicy potato chips?"
"You know it," Levy laughed.
With promises to meet at Lucy's apartment later, Lucy headed out, running to the grocery store. Hopefully her team's job would last a few days and she could actually keep food in her fridge for a while. Back at her place, she hastily straightened up and tossed her pile of dirty clothes in the laundry. By the time she finished organizing her bathroom and hastily fixing herself dinner, the sky was dark.
She smiled at the tell-tale three knocks that rapped at the door. "It's open, Lev!"
The door opened and Levy greeted her, her hands laden with plastic bags.
"I felt bad for kind of inviting myself over," she explained, "so I brought snacks. And some movies. And maybe some craft ideas. I went a little overboard."
Lucy laughed. "It's fine. Honestly, I'm the one that should feel bad. We haven't hung out in forever and it's my fault." She helped Levy unload her bags onto the kitchen table, and they grabbed a few bags of junk food to take over to the couch. Once they got cozy, Levy went straight for the jugular.
"So what's this about? I get that we're overdue for a good old fashion binge-a-thon, but that's not why you asked me to come over."
Lucy groaned and leaned her head against the back of the couch. "You couldn't just let me pretend? Just for a minute?"
"Not a chance. I know you too well."
When Lucy didn't say anything, Levy leaned over and grabbed her by the shoulder, shaking her gently. "Come on!" She weedled, drawing out the last syllable. "You can't have any of the macadamia nut cookies I brought if you don't tell me."
Gasping, Lucy put a hand to her heart. "You wouldn't dare! I thought we were friends."
"The threat still stands."
Sighing, Lucy hung her head. "Okay, fine. You win."
"So how are we going to do this?" Levy asked, stroking her chin. "Shrink style? The couch is too small to fit us both if you lie down…"
Lucy laughed. "I think I can manage to spill my guts. Though a cookie might make it easier," she said, waggling her eyebrows.
"Done." Levy snagged the box of cookies from the coffee table, taking out one and tossing it to Lucy. It hit her and the face and she sputtered in outrage.
"You didn't say how I should give you the cookie," Levy defended, stifling laughter.
"Okay, okay. In all seriousness," Lucy said, calming down and settling back into the plush cushions of her sofa. "I need your honest, take-no-prisoners opinion. Be brutal."
Levy nodded, no traces of laughter left on her face.
"Am I bonkers? Like, has how I've been acting lately been as crazy as I feel like it is?"
Levy's eyebrows flew up in concern. "What brought all this on?"
"My team took a job today, and when they asked if I wanted to come, I told them no. I couldn't just leave when…" she couldn't finish the sentence, dropping her gaze to the floor. It felt too real, like a secret she couldn't share.
"When Laxus still hasn't woken up," Levy finished, reaching out to pat her on the knee. "That isn't crazy. I totally get it."
Lucy looked up, surprised. "You do?"
"Yeah. I mean it's kind of obvious how much you care about him. It makes sense you'd want to stay close."
She said it so easily, and Lucy's mouth dropped open in shock. "What? What do you mean I care about him?"
Levy rolled her eyes, throwing her hands in the air. "Please, Lu. I know we haven't talked much the past week or so, but anyone with eyes and a working brain can see."
Lucy wriggled in her seat, feeling the weight of her friend's incredulous stare.
"I don't know," she said after a long moment. "I mean, I know that I care about him. I want him to wake up, but I don't know if it's the same thing you're talking about." When Levy went to object, Lucy cut her off. "But I guess it would be stupid to keep lying to myself. I do feel…connected to him. I never thought about it until the party. He was all alone, and I remembered how I used to feel that way. I didn't want anyone to go through that. When I asked him to dance, I didn't think he'd actually agree, but he did. And it was nice. He was nice. I thought that we could be friends."
"And?" Levy asked.
Lucy stuttered a laugh. Levy was too intuitive for her own good.
"And then he had to go play the hero, and I was terrified. I don't think I've ever been that scared in my life. I don't know what came over me, but I had to be close to him, even if Freed and Bickslow almost bit my head off. It's so strange."
"It doesn't sound so strange to me," Levy said, and her eyes were kind. "Sometimes it works that way."
"But I don't even know him! He's been unconscious this whole time, and I've said so many things. When he wakes up, he won't remember any of them, but it felt like the right thing to do at the time. I just didn't want him to be alone. I wanted him to know that there was someone else to know what it feels like to be abandoned and to not feel good enough for the people who are supposed to love you. I saw a little of myself in him." She tucked her hair behind an ear. "I told my team that today and they laughed at me. I guess me and Laxus having anything in common is a pretty funny thought."
"No offense, Lucy, but your team is full of idiots," Levy quipped. "Natsu's emotional IQ is in the negatives, and Gray and Erza are too bogged down with their own lives to pay attention to anyone else's." Grabbing a cookie of her own, she chomped down, chewing daintily before continuing. She pointed the last half of her cookie at Lucy. "Don't listen to anything they say. It makes perfect sense that you'd feel that way. You guys have gone through a lot of the same things. No offense, but neither of your dads are going to be up for father of the year awards anytime soon. That's a big common factor by itself. You both also tend to take blame upon yourselves. And not talk to anyone about it," she joked, throwing another bit of cookie at Lucy.
"I'm talking to you now, aren't I?" Lucy glared, popping the thrown cookie into her mouth, not bothering to chew with her mouth closed.
"And frankly, I'm shocked."
Levy squawked when a pillow hit her square in the face. The conversation was abandoned in favor of waging pillow war, but as she laughed with Levy, Lucy felt lighter than she had in days.
The next day, she and Levy headed to the guild, and after an encouraging smile, Levy left her at the entrance to the infirmary. With a deep breath, Lucy pushed open the door.
The Thunder Legion was already there, sitting so close together they looked more like a pile of mismatched limbs than three separate people. At the squeaking of the door, their heads snapped in her direction.
"Sorry, guys. I can leave if you want more time with him," she said, not wanting to intrude. As close as they were to Laxus, it felt rude to interrupt their privacy.
"Nah, it's alright," Bickslow said, standing up and sending Freed to the floor in the process. Evergreen helped him up, and he dusted off his coat.
"It's almost time for lunch," Freed said, "and Laxus would not be pleased to know we were neglecting ourselves while he is incapacitated."
"Please. He'd have our asses for how pathetic we've been regardless of whether we skip a few meals." Bickslow's eyes were hidden behind his signature visor, but Lucy was almost certain that he was rolling them.
They filed past her, and Evergreen gave her a pat on the shoulder as she went, but Lucy saw that she too had dark circles under her eyes. Her heart ached for her.
She made her way across the room to where Laxus lay, still and quiet as ever. In all the time Lucy had known him, before this week, she could never have imagined him this way. Laxus had an undeniable presence, even when he said nothing. It was disquieting every time she sat with him, half expecting him to have a snarky comment at the ready, only to be let down every time.
He still lay on his back, the covers drawn up beneath his arm, but markings from the serket venom were more faded. Their only remnants were vague, bruise-like trails curling around his wrists and neck. She was happy to see that Wendy's periodic healing sessions had prevented him from becoming gaunt and sallow over the days without food. It was hard enough to watch him as it was. As it was, the only indicator of his continued unconsciousness was the blonde scruff on his face two shades darker than the hair on his head.
"Hey, Laxus," she greeted, placing one of her hands over his and offering a gentle squeeze. "Sorry I'm late today. I had Levy over for a sleepover last night. I've been so busy recently that I feel like I've let some of my other friendships fall by the wayside."
"Not that I regret spending time with you, or anything," she said in a rush, realizing how her previous words must've sounded. Her face heated up in embarrassment. "I like visiting you a lot. It probably sounds crazy, but even though you can't respond to anything I say, I feel like you're my friend, too, and I don't want you to ever feel alone. At least not if I get a say in it."
She raised his hand up to rest her forehead against it.
"I had a good time last night, though. Levy definitely has some strong opinions, but she was a big help. I don't know what I'd do without her. She convinced me I wasn't completely crazy for feeling so connected to you."
Sighing, she set his hand down, opting to trace the distorted patters on the back of his hand.
"I remember when you fought your father in the Games, and it reminded me of my own dad. When he sent Phantom Lord after everyone, I would've given anything to have been able to do what you did. But at the same time, it must've been hard, no matter how much animosity there is between you. I'm glad we both have Fairy Tail to come back to, though. It's been the family that I've always wanted." Lucy smiled, ducking her head.
"Come to think of it, I never thanked you for what you did. Maybe this should wait until you can actually hear me, but thank you for taking care of Flare for me. It meant a lot, and I'm sorry it took me so long to say so."
She looked at him then, and felt a pit in her stomach. Would she ever get the chance to tell him in person? Would he even want to hear it if she did? She hoped so. Reaching out, she stroked his cheek with the back of her hand.
"You know, the rugged look suits you. You should consider growing a beard for real."
Without pausing to think, she leaned forward to brush a kiss against his cheek. His skin was warm and the stubble tickled her lips. She stifled a giggle at the strange feeling.
A deep inhale beneath her froze the laugh in her throat.
She jumped back, sending the chair she'd been sitting in skidding back. Laxus groaned, one of his hands coming up to scrub at his face, his heavy brows scrunching together against the light in the room.
Elation, shock, and panic warred in Lucy's mind as she watched him struggle into consciousness. She wanted more than anything to stay, to watch him open his eyes and smile at her. Then, with a jolt, she realized that he wouldn't remember anything that'd happened over the past week. For Laxus, he'd be waking up to what might as well be a stranger. They weren't friends. They weren't anything. Where did she get off claiming this moment for herself?
Without daring to even breathe, Lucy fought back the wave of despair that bubbled in her stomach. She'd deal with it later. For now, she'd do the best thing she could do for Laxus.
She ran.
A/N: Lucy is going through it, man. I promise these two will eventually talk, but today is not that day!
Much love to you all!