Hey guys, here's the next chapter. This one took me a while to write and I rewrote it multiple times. I'm not a hundred percent happy with it, but I still like it. I hope you guys do too. Let me know what you think, I love hearing from you guys. Enjoy!
Clarke groaned as she slowly opened her eyes. She was in a tent and it wasn't very bright inside, but the light affected her eyes anyway. She squinted to try and decrease the brightness and brought her arm up to cover her eyes, only to groan louder as she pulled at her injuries.
She felt a hand grab onto hers and lower her arm slowly back down onto the bed she was laying on. "Clarke?" She heard her favorite voice filter in her ears. She opened her eyes fully to see Lexa leaning over her, a look of concern on her face, and a moment later her mom appeared on the other side of her bed.
Clarke tried to sit up and she felt two sets of arms helping to maneuver her body to sit up with as little pain as possible. "Ugh, what happened," she croaked.
Lexa brought a cup up to Clarke's lips and helped her drink from it while her mother explained her injuries, "You have a minor concussion, a laceration on your forehead which I already stitched up and contusions on your ribs and spine. I want to keep in eye on you to make sure the impact didn't cause any internal injuries."
The word impact seemed to be the spark Clarke needed to remember exactly what had happened. "Octavia and Lincoln?" She asked, no longer caring about her own condition and praying that they somehow survived.
Abby's face fell and she shook her head, "I'm so sorry Clarke."
Clarke's shoulders sunk into the bed and her eyes burned with unshed tears. She exhaled shakily before looking to her mother, "Bellamy and Raven?"
"They're okay. I'll go find them, they've been waiting rather anxiously for you to wake up," her mother said. She smiled sadly and squeezed Clarke's arm comfortingly before leaving the tent.
Clarke played the previous events over in her head and vaguely remembered Lexa running after her as she raced back towards the mountain before it exploded. Her eyes widened and she turned to the girl still sitting beside her, "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine Clarke," Lexa answered.
Clarke stared at Lexa and raised an eyebrow, not believing her for a second. Lexa rolled her eyes, "Fine, I took some damage to my ribs, but I'm fine. You got the worst of it and your mother already checked me over."
Clarke looked at the brunette for a moment before she seemed to accept the answer. Then her thoughts drifted to Octavia and Lincoln. "They're gone Lex," Clarke whispered. "It's all my fault."
"No Clarke, it's not," Lexa said reaching up to brush a strand of blonde hair behind her ear.
"It is though. Everywhere I go, death follows. I can't even save the people I'm trying to protect," her voice cracked.
"Don't do that. It's not true," Lexa argued.
"How can you say that? Do you know anyone responsible for more death than I am?"
"Me," Lexa answered simply. "Every loss that occurs in my coalition, is my responsibility. I am responsible for more death than anyone."
"That's not fair Lex. You're not responsible for every death that happens out there," Clarke countered.
"Neither are you," Lexa said.
Clarke sighed and squeezed Lexa's hand. "Thank you," she said. She still wasn't entirely convinced, but Lexa comforted Clarke with such sincerity, maybe she was right.
Lexa leaned down to place a gentle kiss on Clarke's lips, only breaking apart when the tent flap opened and Bellamy and Raven entered. Both of them had red rimmed eyes and tear streaks on their cheeks. Their hair and clothing were a mess and they both looked so broken. Lexa sat up but she never moved from Clarke's side.
Bellamy and Raven came up on the other side of the bed and they both seemed to scan Clarke for any visible injuries, relieved when they didn't see anything major. "I'm so sorry," Clarke said, barely able to hold back her tears when she saw her friends and the state they were in.
"She's gone Clarke. I was supposed to protect her and I failed," he whispered.
"Bellamy, you know that's not true. She was strong, she was her own person, and she could take care of herself."
Bellamy's eyes seemed to soften and he nodded his acknowledgement. "What even happened in there?" Raven asked weakly.
"I don't know. I thought they were right behind us," Clarke answered sadly.
"I don't know how to do this without her," Bellamy quietly admitted.
Clarke reached for Bellamy's hand and she let go of Lexa to reach for Raven. Raven took Clarke's hand and then she reached for Bellamy as well. The three of them held onto each other tightly. With Octavia gone, the three of them would need each other and they were all more than willing to be there for the others. They had a bond and it may not be by blood, but it was there and it was powerful, and they would get through it somehow. Together.
/
"Octavia? Octavia?" Lincoln yelled, stumbling through the reaper tunnels. He was covered in ash and dust that clung to his skin with the help from his blood and sweat. His entire body ached and he was searching desperately for the love of his life.
Octavia groaned as she opened her eyes. It was dark, and she couldn't see much, but she knew where she was. Her and Lincoln had followed Emerson into the reaper tunnels just as the mountain blew. Part of the tunnel collapsed and then everything went black. "Octavia?" She heard a faint voice calling her name and her ears perked up.
"Octavia?" She heard again. She tried to push herself to her feet, but for some reason she couldn't move. "Linc," she called out, her voice quieter than she intended. "Linc," she called again and she heard fast footsteps approaching.
"Octavia," he breathed when he finally saw her on the ground. He ran to her side in relief, but his eyes widened when he reached her side.
"I'm stuck," she said as he stared down the rubble that Octavia's lower half was pinned under. He immediately pushed aside his own pain and went to work removing the rocks that she was pinned under.
He removed the rubble down to the biggest boulder that had her pinned down, "I'm going to try and lift this. I need you to roll out from underneath it," he said knowing that this boulder was too heavy for him to hold for too long.
Octavia nodded her understanding and Lincoln grunted as he used all his strength to move the boulder. Octavia groaned in pain, but she rolled her body to the side and pulled her leg from under the rock.
Lincoln dropped it the moment she was free and he was by her side helping her up. Octavia rose to her feet, but her leg was badly injured and she could barely put any pressure on it. Lincoln took her arm and put it over his shoulder to help lead her out of the tunnels, but Octavia wasn't ready to go just yet. "We still need to find Emerson," she said through grit teeth.
"Octavia he got away and I need to get you to a healer," he argued.
Octavia scanned the ground of the maze of tunnels and found some drops of blood and scuffed gravel. "He was injured in the blast too," she said, motioning to the trail she saw. "I won't go back without him."
Lincoln sighed, but didn't argue. He knew Octavia needed to do this and he would help her. He led her down the path and they came up to a body on the ground. He was wearing Azgeda colors and the scarring on his face only confirmed his origins. "Let's hope our friends fared better than this," Lincoln said as her and Octavia continued down the path.
It didn't take them long to hear voices just ahead of them and they slowed down to make sure they didn't give away their arrival. They slowly and quietly followed the path until they saw Emerson and three others. They all looked like they had been affected by the explosion as well. Two of them were bleeding heavily and walking slowly behind the other two. Emerson was being helped by the warrior who seemed to be the least damaged. It looked like his leg had been badly broken.
Octavia and Lincoln came up from behind and took out the two guards in the back silently, before the others could notice. By the time Emerson and his other guard noticed, Octavia and Lincoln were on them. Lincoln dispatched of the warrior helping Emerson and Octavia punched Emerson in the face, sending him to the ground, and then pulled his hands behind his back and bound them tightly. He tried to struggle but he was not in the right position and another punch to the jaw shut him up quickly.
Lincoln helped both of them up to their feet and all three of them limped out of the tunnels. Once they came out into the sunlight Lincoln whistled, three short blasts. The whistle was quickly answered by two long ones and then two Trikru scouts dropped down from the trees. "We need to get him back to Heda now," Lincoln said, pushing the bound Emerson towards the two scouts. They grabbed his shoulders roughly and started to lead him through the trees, not caring about his injuries at all.
Lincoln turned to pick up Octavia and carried her bridal style behind the two guards leading Emerson as they returned back to they're hopefully well friends.
/
Clarke, Bellamy, and Raven were all sitting together outside around a fire. Clarke didn't want to stay in the infirmary and she managed to convince everyone to let her out. The three hadn't left each other's side and they tried to provide as much comfort for the other as possible.
The camp had been moved away from the mountain. No one wanted to be close to it because of the negative memories, stench of smoke, and danger of any possible aftershocks.
The three friends were all struggling, each of them blaming themselves for their loss. It was irrational, it wasn't any of their faults, but they all found their own way to blame themselves. They were sitting by the fire telling whatever memories they had of their fallen friends, trying to remember the good times they had shared.
Lexa had been watching them from afar. She was letting them mourn their friend on their own, but she never took her eyes from her love. She noticed that Echo had been keeping a close eye on the group from afar as well, but she didn't dwell on it. She was being watched by one of her scouts, so she wouldn't be a problem, but she didn't seem like she was trying to deceive them.
"Heda! Heda!" The voices rang out from the trees and Lexa found herself by Clarke's side quickly. The group had all risen to their feet and Clarke already had a knife in her hand ready to strike. Lexa had a hand on her sword as well and she waited to find out was going on.
Three bodies came out of the tree line, two of them she recognized as her guards, dragging another man who was clearly injured. She heard Clarke's breath hitch and she turned to her questioningly. "Emerson," Clarke breathed, recognizing the injured man the moment he was dragged into the clearing.
Lexa's head shot back to the injured man and recognition dawned on her. He was the bastard who offered her that deal back on the mountain and he was the reason Clarke had been forced to serve Nia for so long. She felt an anger simmer deep in her bones and she bared her teeth, storming towards him. "Tie him up in the prisoner's tent. I want at least four guards on him at all times," she growled her orders, barely able to contain her own rage.
Clarke watched as Emerson was dragged off towards the tent, but not before he flashed a smirk in her direction. Clarke felt her muscles tense and she could feel her hand gripping the blade in her hand tighter, but before she could react she saw movement out of the corner of her eye.
She turned back to the tree line where a bloody and dirty Lincoln appeared, carrying an injured but very much alive Octavia. "Octavia," Clarke breathed in excitement and relief before she took off towards them, Bellamy and Raven behind her.
Lincoln lowered Octavia down to her feet just in time for her to be wrapped in a tight embrace by Clarke. "We thought you were dead," Clarke said relief evident in her tone.
Then two more bodies collided with the two and Octavia found herself wrapped up in the arms of her best friends and brother. They stayed that way for a while before the four separated, tears streaming down each of their faces. "I'm sorry," Octavia replied, not realizing exactly what effect her idea to go after Emerson would have on everyone. "I saw Emerson and I failed getting him once. I couldn't again."
Clarke shook her head, "Please don't do anything like that again."
Octavia smiled, "No promises."
The group laughed and Bellamy enveloped his sister in another embrace lifting her from the ground and spinning her in the air. He had never felt a worse pain when he thought his sister was dead and he had never felt more relieved in his entire life than he did in this moment.
Clarke and Raven smiled and let brother and sister reunite and they turned to Lincoln. They had both grown to care for the man and were extremely relieved to see him alive as well. They pulled him into a tight hug, which he returned enthusiastically.
Moments later Lexa and Abby walked up. Lexa reached out her forearm towards Lincoln and he gripped it firmly with a smile on his face and Abby started to examine his injuries. Lincoln allowed her to look him over but then directed her to Octavia who he was much more concerned about.
Abby ordered Octavia to the healers tent and Bellamy picked her up to take her there, not willing to let her walk on her own and not willing to leave his sisters side. Raven and Lincoln followed as well, leaving Clarke and Lexa behind.
Clarke felt extremely relieved to see Octavia and Lincoln alive, but she couldn't fully revel in it knowing Emerson was so close to her. "I need to see him," Clarke said.
Lexa sighed. She knew she wasn't going to win this argument, but she had to try, "No you don't Clarke."
"I do. And you know it," she replied.
Lexa nodded, "Fine, but I'm in the tent too."
"Fine, but whatever you hear, don't react to it," Clarke replied.
Lexa narrowed her eyes. She knew she wasn't going to like whatever he said, but she was Heda. She could control herself. She nodded and the two of them headed to the prisoners tent.
There were two guards outside the tent, who opened the flaps for the two leaders to enter. Two more guards were inside and Lexa quickly had them dismissed. Emerson was tied to a pole in the center of the tent. His body was caked in blood, sweat, and ash, and it was clear that his leg was badly broken. His eyes locked on Clarke's the moment she entered and they never wavered. "You're the one who blew up the mountain," Clarke said and it wasn't a question.
Emerson smirked, "It's nice to see you too Clarke. Tell me, how has the assassin business been going?" His eyes widened in mock shock before continuing, "Oh that's right, I forgot. The people here don't know who you really are."
Clarke narrowed her eyes, "The people here know who I am."
Emerson eyed her momentarily. She didn't react as harshly as he had expected when he brought up her being an assassin and the Commander behind her didn't either. But there was no way Clarke had told her right? "Tell me, has The Shadow killed anyone recently."
"I'm afraid she hasn't, but keep talking and she just might," Clarke bit back.
Emerson froze. Clarke had just admitted to being The Shadow in front of the Commander and neither of them flinched. It was unexpected that Clarke would share her identity, but he wouldn't let Clarke get the upper hand, "So you told the Commander who you are. Only, she doesn't truly know who you are. What you are."
"Call me what you like Emerson. I've heard worse, I've called myself worse. Your words mean nothing," Clarke replied, her face hard, eyes cold.
"You think you're safe now that the Commander knows your secret. What happens when her people find out who you are? What happens when they find out the Commander was already aware? They'll call for both your heads," Emerson sneered.
Clarke didn't let what Emerson said faze her, even though there were truth behind those words. Her reaction, or lack there of, only seemed to piss Emerson off more. His eyes shifted to Lexa, who had been silently standing behind Clarke the entire time. She was angry, but the only way you could tell was by her tightly clenched fists. "And you Commander. I thought you cared about your people, yet you let an assassin walk around freely."
Lexa felt her muscles tense at the words, but didn't react further. "Do you even know the extent of the monster standing before you?" Emerson continued.
Lexa's eyes flashed dangerously, and it made Emerson smirk. His eyes returned to Clarke, "You killed three hundred of her warriors, you burned over three hundred of my people, not to mention those you assassinated." Clarke felt a growl rumble low in her chest, but she couldn't let him get to her. "Your hands are stained red and I don't think that color will ever fade. You're a murderer, a monster, and I haven't even brought up your most gruesome kills yet."
Clarke's entire body tightened and her hand reached down to the dagger on her hip. Her eyes clouded over in anger and her muscles began to almost vibrate. Emerson saw it. He was getting to her now, and he pressed forward. "I know about your kills Clarke. I know about the times when you lost control, when your kills were so heinous, The Shadow didn't even get credit for them. Tell me, does the Commander know about that?"
Clarke snapped. She pulled the dagger from her belt and lunged forward, stabbing the blade into his leg. He cried out in pain and prepared for another attack, but there was none.
The Commander had her arms wrapped around Clarke's waist and was pulling the raging blonde backwards and out of the tent.
Clarke's breath was heaving and her muscles were coiled tighter than any other time she could remember. "I'm sorry," Clarke whispered when she calmed down. "I guess you weren't the one I needed to worry about reacting to his words."
"Are you alright?" Lexa questioned.
"I need some air," Clarke said blankly and she took two steps away before the Commander grabbed her arm and pulled her back.
"Clarke-"
"I'll be fine Lexa," she snapped back, before taking another deep breath. "I just need to be alone for a little bit."
"Okay," Lexa replied softly, not putting up any more of a fight.
"He'll have answers for you on some of Nia's plan," Clarke said.
"I'll see what he knows," Lexa replied. She watched as Clarke nodded at her response and then turned and left the camp, disappearing into the treeline.
/
Clarke walked into the treeline and kept going. She needed to breathe, needed to be alone, and she needed to gather herself. She had told herself she wouldn't let Emerson get to her, but he had.
Clarke walked at a quick pace in the trees and she knew someone was following her. One of Lexa's scouts, probably asked to keep an eye on her, but Clarke wanted to be alone. She knew how to slip a tail, had done it multiple times before. She left no tracks as she moved and used the shadows and various intervals of speed to lose the guard following her.
When she was truly alone she stopped and took deep breaths. Images of mangled, injured, tortured bodies kept popping up in her mind. Images that she had locked down in the farthest place in her mind to never think of again. But Emerson had the key that opened the door to those memories and they were flooding Clarke's memory, burning her eyelids as the images resurfaced before her.
Clarke took deep breaths. She was starting to hyperventilate and she needed to calm down now. She closed her eyes and forced herself to think of something calming, something to get these images out of her mind and green eyes was the first thing she saw.
She focused on them. Drawing strength from their depths and used them to get her breathing under control. When she was calm she opened her eyes. The wind blew and she could feel the chill that spread across her cheeks where her tears had dropped.
Clarke growled in frustration. She had let Emerson get to her, let herself be reminded of that dark place that she had locked away in a desperate attempt to forget. "Damn it," she breathed and she pulled out a dagger.
She stormed up to the closest tree and plunged the dagger into the bark and pulled it back out, stabbing the tree multiple times with all her effort. Her body ached but she didn't care, she needed to forget. Needed to lock those memories away again.
Her frustration clouded her mind so much, she didn't realize the body in the tree above her until it was too late. Clarke spun around right as a body pounced from above and collided with her chest, sending her sprawling backwards onto the ground.
She rolled back onto her feet and gasped trying to restore some oxygen to her lungs from the hit. "Ontari," she sneered as she looked into the cold eyes of the person she hated almost as much as Nia and Emerson.
"Clarke," Ontari said with a smirk.
"What are you doing here?" She questioned, looking around for her knife she had dropped when she had taken the hit.
"I came here to talk," Ontari said.
"Yeah? Well I'm not in the mood," she said and she charged forward, taking a swing at Ontari's head. Ontari ducked under the blow and hit Clarke in the ribs.
Clarke's movements were slower than she would have liked thanks to her injuries from the explosion, and the blow to her stomach only made it worse, but she pushed through. Ontari kicked at her ribs, but Clarke dodged the blow and launched her own attack. Her first two punches were blocked, but her third connected with Ontari's jaw.
The brunette growled and charged forward again, but her moves were clouded by her anger, weren't as precise as they could be, and Clarke was able to block them all.
Clarke kicked out Ontari's legs from under her and the brunette went crashing to the ground. Clarke was on her in a second and she picked up the knife she had previously dropped and held it to the downed girl's throat.
"Nia's angry Clarke," Ontari said through her heavy breathing, not at all concerned with the current position she found herself in. "You made her look foolish, and she is ready to make you suffer."
"She can try," Clarke snarled.
"Oh she will Clarke. She knows your weakness. It's your heart," Ontari replied. "You may not care about yourself but you care about your people, your friends. I wonder what their screams will sound like."
Clarke pushed the blade into Ontari's neck a little harder, almost breaking skin, "Don't touch them."
"Nia has plans for them," Ontari continued, ignoring the threat. "She'll capture them. Torture them, kill them, maybe even turn them into a better version of you. That dark haired girl. What's her name? Octavia. She's a little spit fire. She'd be a good assassin. That girl Raven. She wouldn't, not with that crap leg, but I'm sure it'll be fun to hear her scream."
"Shut. Up." Clarke roared, applying enough pressure to break skin, a light stream of blood pooling around the blade.
"And that boy Bellamy. He seems to think it's his job to protect you, but who will protect him? I think your mother's screams will be my favorite. Nia's going to kill them all, and she's going to force you to watch," Ontari said with a wicked smile. "And then there's Lexa." Clarke growled from above her, but Ontari continued. "Nia's going to make her suffer most of all, and you're going to watch. And then when she's too weak to do anything, Queen Nia will torture you. She'll force Lexa to watch as your body is burned, branded, your skin ripped from your bones, your blood staining the floors and the walls. She'll bring you to the point of near death before she'll switch back to your precious Commander. She'll kill Lexa, slowly and painfully while you watch, and then, when you've lost everything, Queen Nia will kill you too."
"You won't win," Clarke grit out, trying to keep the images that Ontari was creating from playing in her mind.
"And how will you stop us? You don't know Queen Nia's plan. You won't be able to stop it," Ontari said with so much confidence, Clarke was afraid it was true.
She lost her focus for a second, and that was all it took for Ontari to spin them over, flipping positions, and reigning down blows onto Clarke's face. Clarke felt her cheek and lip split open before she brought her blade up to protect herself, and cut into Ontari's arm.
Ontari grunted in pain and Clarke was able to throw her off, and they both popped up to their feet. Clarke took another few hits to the face and gut before her knife dug deep into Ontari's side. She groaned in pain and staggered backwards, away from the blonde.
Clarke stalked forward, prepared to end Ontari's fight, but the brunette always liked to play dirty. She picked up a handful of dirt and threw it into Clarke's eyes.
Clarke hissed and stumbled backwards, using one arm to try and rid her eyes of the dirt and the other she held up to prepare to block the next strike. None came.
When Clarke was able to open her eyes, she was alone in the clearing, the only sign of Ontari was the marks in the dirt and a small bloodstain. Clarke looked around and listened, to try and figure out if Ontari was still in the area, and after a moment she realized she was alone.
Clarke dropped unceremoniously to the ground with a huff. "Fuck," she groaned as she crawled over to a tree to lean up against. Her entire body ached and her mind was full of images that she couldn't let come to pass. She needed to know Nia's plan. She needed answers. And she was going to get them, no matter what she had to do.